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“sanha?”
eunwoo searches around, eyes wide as his heart races so fast it feels as though it's going to burst out of his chest. he keeps calling for the younger man, running running running, but there is only an empty, white room as far as the eye can see, and a piercing sound that hurts his ears.
if he listens closely, it sounds like someone is crying.
“sanha,” he tries again, panicked now as he runs a hand through his messy hair. “where are you?”
something in the distance shatters, the sound of a glass tide breaking against shore, and the shrill cry stops. the silence that follows is abundantly worse, digging deep in the hallows of eunwoo's ribs. it aches, sends a tremendous pain shooting down the length of his body, forcing him to his knees.
even still, he doesn't give up.
“sanha, if you can hear me, yell my name,” he says. his voice echoes off the sickly white walls, and he squeezes his eyes shut tight until color explodes behind his lids. fireworks that paint, ‘listen listen listen.’
for a long while, there is no sound besides his own breathing. he presses the heel of his palm right to the center of his chest, against his breastbone, and pushes down hard. his heart still beats beneath his rough touch, and he reminds himself that he is alive. he has to keep searching.
slowly, he manages to get to his feet again, though his legs shake. he leans against a wall to keep his balance, and sucks in a sharp breath. something rustles off in the distance. he doesn't see anything– it's all blank, vast white– but he hears it.
“sanha!” he shouts, voice hoarse now, throat so fucking tight. “please– if you can hear me, call my name!”
and then suddenly something hard knocks into his right shoulder; a force he can't spot with his own two eyes, but can certainly sense. evil right down to the bone. it sends him stumbling backward, colliding with the wall behind him so hard the air gets expelled from his lungs.
sanha's voice rings through the air just then. his words are muffled, warped as though someone is playing a vinyl backwards, but it's definitely him . eunwoo could pick him out anywhere.
another heavy pressure pins him against the wall. he panics, unable to move. sanha's voice grows louder– eunwoo swears he can see someone stumbling around in the distance– but he can't get there. he grunts, palms flat against the wall as he pushes with all of his might to no avail.
“sanha!” he shouts, pained edge to his tone. the figure– just a tiny speck far away– seems to stop moving around at the sound of eunwoo's voice. “sweetheart, come here! i'm h-”
his throat closes, cutting off his words. something hot burns inside of his mouth, as though his vocal cords have caught aflame. he tries to scream, the pain too much to bear, but no sound comes out. tears sting at his eyes, hot and heavy, and whatever entity that has been manipulating his body finally lets up. he collapses to the floor.
the figure in the distance seems to move further away, and eunwoo raises a hand, desperately reaching out for it though he knows it's much too far. he hears sanha's voice again, loud and clear this time, a simple, “eunwoo?” but he can't call back. his own voice has vanished, and his vision is blurry.
he slumps against the wall, defeated, before everything goes black.
and then–
the world comes into view again, but this time he is somewhere familiar. he sees four pale, blue walls that make up his bedroom, and a ceiling fan that spins and spins, and most importantly–
“sanha!”
eunwoo sits up fast, almost bumping heads with the younger man as he wraps his arms around him tight, silently refusing to let go.
sanha only burrows into the crook of his neck and asks, “hyung, are you okay? you were shouting in your sleep, and-”
“i was dreaming,” eunwoo cuts him off. his eyes burn, and his cheeks feel wet. he knows he's crying– can't stop– is in too deep when a damp sob tears up his throat.
sanha immediately jerks him back at arm's length, brows furrowed with concern. and it'd be cute too, if not for the heavy ache that stings at eunwoo's heart for making him worry like this.
“hyung,” sanha rushes out, sounding positively scared, voice raising in pitch. “i don't understand- what's wrong?”
eunwoo hiccups out another broken sob, and lurches forward to bury his face in sanha's chest. the younger man immediately wraps arms around his shoulders to keep him close. one hand draws patterns along his back to calm him down, and just– just knowing that sanha is here with him and not lost in some endless dream is enough.
“i had this nightmare that you disappeared,” eunwoo eventually manages to get out, words thick with tears. “you didn't- die or anything, i just literally couldn't find you. and i kept shouting for you but you couldn't hear me. 'nd i was so scared, sanha.”
there's this heavy silence that weighs down on them like a dozen barbells for a long, long while. sanha only traces words onto his back, through the fabric of his t-shirt. eunwoo concentrates hard on the younger's movements. manages to make out bits and pieces of sentences every now and then. things like, 'it's okay,’ and, 'love you.’
carefully, so as not to crack the atmosphere around them, that has been protecting them, sanha whispers, “you found me though, eunwoo. here i am.”
the older man only manages a broken laugh, throat burning, but the invisible pressure weighing his shoulders down eases up just the slightest.
sanha presses a kiss to the crown of his head, blush-pink against waves of ember.
he says so softly eunwoo almost misses it, “i'm not going anywhere. you haven't lost me.”
and– perhaps there's some truth to that yet.
eunwoo curls his arms around sanha's waist, clinging tight like his life depends on it, and simply breathes.