Chapter Text
“Okay, Riku! You’ve slept in long enough! Time to get up! You’ve got a big day today!”
Riku groaned and blinked his eyes open to see his boyfriend’s smiling face. Beside him, Kairi let out a louder groan and grabbed the clock set next to their bed.
“Sora,” she hissed. “Nine AM is not ‘sleeping in’.”
“It is if you get up at normal people times, Kairi!” Sora replied, grinning. She threw a pillow at him, and missed badly.
“Whatever,” she muttered. “Bathroom.” She pulled herself out of bed and staggered out the door.
“Come on, you too, Riku! Up and at ‘em!” Sora poked his cheek and Riku swatted his hand away, sitting up.
Sora wasn’t wrong, Riku did have a big day today.
Today was the day he started training Vanitas to control his personal darkness.
It wasn’t that he was nervous, it was that he was terrified. Terrified of getting something wrong, of not being able to be a good teacher, of not being able to fulfil what he’d promised.
Sora could see it on his face. “Hey, quit it. You’re gonna be great, Riku. You’re patient, and you care about Vanitas’s wellbeing. Sure, there’ll be rough patches, but you can do this!”
Despite himself, Riku smiled. “Thanks, Sora.”
“Hey, it’s just the truth!” Sora beamed. “Now, is there anything we can do to get you feeling more confident?” As Sora talked, Riku had been getting dressed. Now fully clothed, he turned back to Sora, smirking a bit at the adoring grin on his boyfriend’s face.
“Get me feeling more confident, huh?” he asked, and took a step towards him. “Well, I think there’s one thing we can do.”
“Great! What’s that?” Sora asked.
Riku’s smirk widened. “Well, I seem to recall someone claiming that I would never top.”
It was kind of like cracking a glowstick, what with how quickly Sora’s face became completely red. “Uh..?” he asked, as Riku stepped forwards until Sora was backed against the side of the bed.
Slowly, Riku traced a finger up Sora’s chest, continuing up his neck and tilting his head upwards with gentle pressure under his chin. “I think… that between the two of us, I think… you might be wrong,” Riku said, softly, his smile growing wider as Sora’s face grew redder. He could hear Sora’s breathing getting faster.
It was very nice, this feeling. Being in control, knowing that he wasn’t going to push Sora further than he was okay with, but also knowing that Sora would probably let him push him further than usual, if he asked.
Riku bent forwards and put a hand on Sora’s shoulder, holding him in place as he kissed him. Sora practically melted under his touch, so that Riku was also practically holding him upright.
The kiss broke off, and there was an excited, longing look in Sora’s eyes that Riku found quite enjoyable. He grinned. “Hey, Sora?”
“Y... yes, Riku?” Sora breathed, almost panting.
“…You’re right. I’ve got a lot of stuff to do today so I’d better get going,” Riku said, smiling brightly. He placed his hand on Sora’s chest and lightly pushed, so that Sora fell backwards onto the bed. “See you later!”
He crossed over to the door, but it opened before he could reach it. “goshdangedmorningtooearlydumbsexyboyfriendsIswearto – Riku?” Kairi said, looking at their boyfriend lying stunned on the bed. “What happened?” A mischievous grin crossed her face. “Are we teasing Sora again?” She moved over to the side of the bed to look at Sora, who had thousand-yard stare on his face.
“Not… quite, Kai,” Riku said, smirking again.
Kairi turned back to him. “Not quite? What do you - !!!” There was a sharp intake of breath as Riku snaked his hand up her back and gently grasped a handful of her hair. He didn’t pull on it, but his grip was quite firm, and Kairi stilled.
Riku’s smile grew wider, and he gently pulled back, raising her head up to look at him. “Sora wondered if there was anything he could do help me feel more confident. And honestly? It’s working pretty well.”
“Oh… good…” Kairi whispered. Slowly, tenderly, Riku leaned towards her raised head, kissing her harder than he usually did. Like Sora, she melted under his touch. She started to raise a hand of her own, but he gave a slight tug to her hair and she dropped it immediately.
Riku broke the kiss, and smiled at her. Kairi had the exact same expectant and longing look in her eyes that Sora did. “This helped a lot, too. Thanks, Princess.”
His grin widened as Kairi’s face turned just as red as Sora’s. “But, I have to get going,” he added, and released her hair, giving her the same gentle push so that she fell over the bed just like Sora. He cast a look back at them, lying upside down next to each other, and felt pretty good. “See you later!”
He closed the door behind him and walked off. Sora and Kairi lay there silently on the bed. After a while, Sora spoke.
“Kairi?”
“Yeah, Sora?”
“Our boyfriend’s hot.”
“Yep.”
The silence returned for a while, until Kairi said.
“Sora?”
“Yeah, Kairi?”
“I’m kind of glad he isn’t like that all the time. We would never leave this room.”
“Yep.”
Riku rolled his shoulders and grimaced. The high he’d gotten from Sora and Kairi had only carried him so far, and now he was staring across the training field at a very grumpy Vanitas.
“So, uh… Ven said you can summon your Keyblade again?” he asked.
Vanitas’s eyes narrowed even further than they’d started at. “Yes.”
Riku resisted the urge to roll his eyes. “May I see it?”
Begrudgingly, Vanitas held out a hand and summoned his Keyblade. Riku nodded approvingly. “How does it fit? Have you tried practicing with it yet?” he asked.
Vanitas shrugged. “Haven’t had a chance. Still talking to the old fuck.”
Riku drew in a deep breath, deciding to ignore the slight against Yen Sid. Reacting to it would only feed into Vanitas’s mood, if Aqua was anything to go by. “There are some targets set up here. Take a couple of minutes, get readjusted to it. My newer Keyblade was a bit awkward for me the first time I picked it up.”
Vanitas made no attempt to resist the urge to roll his eyes. “Whatever.” He strode over to the other side of the gymnasium Riku had asked to meet him in, and started attacking the targets.
Riku used the opportunity to take a look at Vanitas’s form. To his mild surprise, it resembled his own quite a bit. Though there was an edge of savagery that Riku wanted to think he didn’t have. His own strikes were more surgical; Vanitas’s were harsher.
But it was a similar enough basis that he could tell they’d had the same teacher. Not, he supposed, that either of them wanted to consider Xehanort (or Ansem, in Riku’s case) in that manner.
“There, I practiced. Happy?” Vanitas said, sarcasm dripping from his tone. He’d walked back over while Riku was lost in thought.
“Doesn’t matter if I’m happy with it,” Riku said. “You’re the one who has to use it.”
Vanitas looked at him oddly, like he was confused. The distrust was evident in his expression.
“A-anyway,” Riku continued, stumbling a little over his words. “I’m guessing Xehanort would have taught you to draw power from the Darkness out in the worlds, right? That’s what Ansem tried to teach me to do.”
Vanitas shrugged. “Sure. Whatever.”
Riku blinked. There was recalcitrant, and then there was Vanitas. “You know this is a two-way street, right?” he asked. “I can’t teach you if you aren’t interested in learning.”
Vanitas glared at him. “I’m interested. Just wake me up when we start.”
“We… have started,” Riku said, at a loss.
“Really? You haven’t even summoned your Keyblade yet,” Vanitas pointed out, smugly, like that was supposed to mean something to Riku.
“No? I want to talk you though what I want you to do first. I wouldn’t be much of a teacher if I just… expected you to know what I wanted you to do without explaining it,” Riku said.
There was a hardening in Vanitas’s expression. “Whatever,” he muttered, and Riku figured he was dropping the subject.
“Right. So, what I’m going to try to teach you to do, is recognize your own darkness as distinct from the big Darkness,” Riku said, internally cringing over his word choice and hoping it didn’t make him sound like too much of an idiot.
“Why?” Vanitas asked.
“Because the big Darkness is the kind that corrupts, and everyone has their own personal darkness that won’t corrupt them,” Riku said. “And yes, the big Darkness is probably stronger, but I don’t consider losing myself again to be worth using it. I’ve seen someone do that. Go further than I ever dared, until it consumed them. I don’t want that to happen to me, or to you.”
“Consumed?” Vanitas asked, interest piqued for what seemed like the first time.
“I think he fell into the Realm of Darkness. I’m not sure,” Riku explained. “He might just be dead.”
Vanitas shrugged. “Sucks to be him. If he was that weak–”
“Strength had nothing to do with it,” Riku said, quietly, but in a firm tone. “Yes, he was reckless and power-hungry, but it wasn’t entirely his own fault. And we’re getting off topic,” he added. “How familiar are you with your own darkness?”
Vanitas shrugged again. “It exists. Used to think it was all I was. Most of what I could do I got from negative emotions. You know, the only ones I had.”
“Right. Uh… But you know how to use darkness with your magic, right? Dark Firaga and all that?”
“Yeah,” Vanitas said, glaring at Riku like he was an idiot. Riku was trying very hard not to feel like one.
“Good! It’s like doing that, but you draw the power from yourself, and only yourself. It shouldn’t be too different from using your negative emotions to summon Unversed, right?”
Immediately Riku realized he’d said something wrong. “I didn’t have a choice in making Unversed,” Vanitas grit out. “They just happened, when I felt things.”
“I’m sorry. I didn’t understand,” Riku apologized. Vanitas rolled his eyes again. “But it should be the same principle. You’re not a channel for the power, it just comes from you. Would you be willing to try?” he asked, gesturing at the targets again, which had magically repaired themselves while they were talking.
“Try what?” Vanitas asked, suspicious.
“Using a Dark Firaga, or any other dark spell, with only your own darkness,” Riku said. “Here, I’ll show you what I mean.” He completely missed the way Vanitas stiffened as he summoned his Keyblade. “Like this.” He launched a Dark Firaga at one target, obliterating it.
“Now, you try,” he said, as the target reassembled. Vanitas glanced at him, suspicion and… something else that Riku couldn’t place in his eyes.
Begrudgingly, Vanitas raised his Keyblade, and gritted his teeth. Darkness pooled around his feet as he cast the spell.
Riku could smell the rotten scent of Darkness in the magic. “Not quite. I know it’s probably instinctive, but the darkness has to come just from you. Try it again.” He noticed the odd way Vanitas was eyeing his Keyblade. “Something wrong?”
“No,” Vanitas said, just a tiny hair too fast. He raised Lost Memory and tried it again, but Riku could still tell it wasn’t just his darkness in the spell.
“Again.”
If Riku had been a more experienced teacher, he might have picked up on the minute way Vanitas was wincing every time he failed. He might have noticed the anxiety that was beginning to grow on Vanitas’s face, the tension building in the other boy’s frame. He might have realized, before it became a problem, what was wrong.
But Riku was new to teaching. And he himself was only seventeen. Teaching is a learning experience for both the student and the master, and some lessons can only be learned the hard way.
“Again.”
“I… I can’t.”
“Huh?” Riku looked over to see that Vanitas was practically shaking.
“I… can’t!” And to his surprise Vanitas collapsed into a ball, holding his arms over his head with his eyes squeezed tightly shut. “I can’t do it, I’m too weak, just get it over with already!”
“Get… get what over… Vanitas, what’s wrong?” Riku had no idea what was happening, almost freezing himself in concern. He just didn’t know what to do.
Fortunately, he wasn’t alone.
“Put the Keyblade away!”
The command, in a tone that brooked no argument, rang out across the gymnasium. Startled, Riku let his Keyblade vanish, and there was an instantly noticeable, if minute, lessening in Vanitas’s shaking.
Into the room strode the last person Riku had ever expected. They crossed over to Vanitas and knelt down beside him.
“We don’t punish people for not being able to do something here,” said Donald, in a softer tone than Riku had ever expected from him. “If you can’t do something immediately, we want to help you learn and grow.”
Vanitas’s breathing was starting to slow. “B-but… I can’t do it…” he said, helplessly.
“Neither can I,” Donald said. “I couldn’t do any magic when I started out. It took time, and practice, to get as good as I am now.”
Riku resisted the temptation to point out the doubts he harboured over Donald’s skill. “He’s right. We all start somewhere, and nobody is perfect the first time. I’m not going to punish you for not getting it right away.” He knelt down beside Vanitas as well, but didn’t reach out for him, assuming he didn’t want any physical contact at the moment.
He should have known better. Should have realized that the only teaching methods Vanitas knew were Xehanort’s. Should have guessed that Vanitas would assume all teaching was a form of physical abuse. Should have noticed that Vanitas was trying to hide his fear. Should have –
Donald was waving a wing (hand?) in front of his face. “Riku, you still there?” he asked.
“Huh? Oh, yeah. I was…” Riku started, but Donald patted him on the shoulder.
“I know what you were doing. I’ll talk to you about it in a minute, but first we need to help Vanitas,” he said.
“I don’t need help,” Vanitas muttered.
“Too bad, you’re getting it,” Donald said. “Riku’s not going to punish you at all, right, Riku?”
Riku nodded. “If I’m hurting you, it means you aren’t learning.”
“If you’re not hurting me, how do you expect the lesson to stick?” Vanitas snapped, glaring at both of them.
“Because you’re a skilled, quick-witted person,” Donald said. “And most importantly, you want to learn. You want to get better, right? Get stronger?”
“…yes,” Vanitas said, looking away from them.
“And you know, that this is a way how,” Donald continued. “Right?”
“…I guess,” Vanitas muttered.
“Then that’s all the motivation you need!” Donald concluded. “You don’t need the threat of punishment to get better. And we’re not going to punish you. We’re not Xehanort.”
To Riku’s shock, a miniscule smile twitched onto Vanitas’s lips. “I guess you aren’t,” he said, and the smile was gone as quickly as it had arrived, replaced by a grimace.
Donald held out a hand to pull Vanitas to his feet. Vanitas’s hand flew towards Donald’s, but stopped before he slapped it away. “…No, I want to do this on my own,” he said, not meeting Donald’s eyes.
Donald nodded. “All right.” Vanitas pulled himself to his feet.
“Do you want a moment to calm down?” Riku asked. Without waiting for a response, he said. “Come back over here when you’re ready.”
“I..” Vanitas started, but then merely nodded, and walked to the other side of the gym.
“Get some water!” Donald called after him, and Vanitas did something Riku couldn’t see with his hand. Donald sighed. “They never said it would be easy, huh?” he asked Riku, smirking.
“I… guess…” Riku said. “I’m not really… this isn’t…”
“This is your first time teaching someone else,” Donald said, nodding. “So if Vanitas isn’t going to be perfect the first time, why should you?”
“Huh? But… I… if he can’t do something, he can try again until he gets it right. If I mess up, there’s more at stake than just my pride,” Riku protested.
“Yeah, and that’s why I was hanging about,” said Donald. “Riku, you’re new at this. It is important to get it right, but you don’t have the experience yet to do it perfectly. And no teacher is perfect. Even Master Yen Sid.”
“…I’m not sure if it’s his fault Mickey is the way he is,” Riku said, smirking.
Donald shrugged. “His Majesty is his Majesty. You see my point, right? Even someone who’s been a Master for decades can’t be perfect. And it’s only been a couple of months for you. So, stop beating yourself up for being new at this, ya big palooka!” He lightly punched Riku’s arm.
“Donald… If I do mess up… and people get hurt because of it…” The “again” hung in the air, unspoken.
“Then we’ll be there to help you pick up the pieces this time,” Donald said. “But it won’t come to that, Riku. We all trust you. It’s time that you started trusting yourself.” He smiled. “You care. You care about Vanitas, you care about your partners, you care about your friends. And that’s one of the most important things there is. As a teacher, and as a person.”
Riku looked down at his hands. “Donald… I’m scared that I’m going to fuck this up somehow.”
Donald nodded. “So is everyone who ever teaches anything. You gotta trust, in your student, and in yourself. And hey, if there’s one thing we know for sure, it’s that Vanitas is very stubborn!”
Riku snorted. “I think he’d prefer the term ‘determined’.”
Donald waved dismissively. “Six of one, baker’s dozen of the other.”
“That’s… that’s not the same amount–” Riku started to say, but he was cut off by Vanitas returning to their side of the gym. “How are you feeling, Vanitas?”
“Go fuck yourself,” Vanitas replied, but his mood seemed to have stabilized. “I’m trying it again.”
“Not so fast,” Donald said.
“Huh?”
“There’s one other thing we can do to distance you from your time with Xehanort,” he said, tapping the side of his beak with a finger.
“And what’s that?” Vanitas asked, instantly suspicious again.
Donald gestured to Vanitas’s dark suit, which he hadn’t taken off since he’d regained his own body. (It had been something of a fight to get him to take showers, and no one was sure he’d actually taken it off.) “We can go over to Twilight Town and get you some clothes of your own!”
Several emotions crossed Vanitas’s face. Riku registered confusion, distrust, anger, surprise, and for some reason, fear. “I’d go with you, too,” he offered, and Vanitas looked between the two of them.
“…If I can bring one other person, fine,” he said, slowly.
“Sure you can,” Donald said. “Who did you have in mind?”