Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

Yang could feel her skin tingling, knowing a pair of eyes were on her directly. It had been like this for days now, the blonde pretending she didn't know that her teammate was burning holes right through her. It wasn't a harsh stare, of course, it was that soft, longing look she knew all too well.

It was ironic, really. She'd always given Blake that look back at Beacon, holding back gentle sighs and soft smiles for the sake of team dynamics and friendships. That tight, gut-clenching feeling whenever the girl would give her a knowing smirk after a successful team attack, or when she'd simply brush against her, absorbed by whichever book she was reading at the time. Yang felt the intense spark of electricity shoot through her whenever they held hands or hugged - which they did frequently. Blake was surprisingly touchy whenever no one was around, and that was okay with Yang.

When Sun Wukong came around, she felt... lost. Yang thought they'd be together. Not because they were both faunus or anything, just because they seemed to get along. At first, at least. Blake had told her she was happy to meet someone else who knew of her struggles when they had first met. However, as time passed, it seemed the sentiment was far from the truth. Blake always seemed to grow frustrated around the boy's presence and some times even avoided him. Yang grew worried that there would be a repeat of Blake's disappearance from earlier that year, and decided to confront her teammate about it.

"I was wrong," she'd said. "He doesn't understand at all. He doesn't understand why I've done everything I've done. His social cues suck." Yang had ingrained Blake's next words to her mind permanently, specifically the longing and the airy sigh that came with them. "If only he was like you."

Since then, Yang Xiao Long has been a mess. Thinking constantly of those words, of what they implied. Yang had the qualities that Blake sought out in a potentially romantic partner. Now every look exchanged and every touch held a whole other meaning. Quite frankly, she had hoped Blake and Sun would get together, so she could move on from Blake and keep the team stable. But with the knowledge that her teammate had no interest in Sun? That she had the desired traits? No way was Yang sleeping.

Her feelings for Blake grew before she could even think of restraint, and by the time the tournament came around, Yang was working up the nerve to talk to Blake about those feelings. It had worked for her dad - not... well, but it had worked - why wouldn't it work for her? Everything had been great. They shared their victory, and Yang swore she had to physically restrain herself after their fight with team ABRN. The excitement of winning a match and their group huddling together had her heart jumping around. Despite the sweat and the bruises and the exhaustion, Yang had thought Blake was glowing.

Yang wanted to kiss Blake. So, so badly.

Then the fight against Mercury happened and there was a shift in their relationship. Even if it was brief, there was a feeling of distance between them, a chasm Yang felt she would never close. Blake came around, naturally, but the feeling had been so bitter... she couldn't handle it. She had been so desperate for Blake's approval, for Blake to trust her, to believe her, she really couldn't breathe. Since when had this girl burrowed herself so deeply in her heart? Little did she know, that was only a taste of what was to come.

Then came that night.

All she saw was Blake in danger and her vision went red, then black. She never remembered any of it, but she remembered the desperation she felt when she woke and realized Blake was no longer at her side.

She spent a very long time in bed, more at a loss of Blake's disappearance than losing her arm. That's when it dawned on her at full force.

She was in love with Blake Belladonna.

God, she cried night after night. Why had Blake left her? She didn't realize how much she needed her until she was gone. It hurt more than her arm had hurt, it had hurt more than any injury. In the moment, even the loss of Summer dulled in comparison. It made Yang so angry.

When she was finally able to get out of bed, her father had to talk to her sternly multiple times. It took week upon week upon week of training until Yang was finally back to speed. That's when the arm arrived. She had begun to get used to the imbalance of not having an arm, and she was hesitant to change yet again. But she came to, and the arm helped make her feel whole again. A can of spray paint later, and she felt her heart ease up a bit for the first time in months.

She knew her dad probably hated Blake for what she did. She wanted to hate Blake too. She really did. And for a while, she thought she did. Instead, Yang evaluated her feelings, and decided that the "hate" was really just hurt, and a lot of it. So, she put those feelings aside, put the thought of Blake out of her mind and focused on getting better, sparring with her dad, riding Bumblebee again. She even started up her search for her mother again. Taiyang was upset that his other daughter was leaving, but ultimately, he couldn't stop her.

Yang had found her mother alright, just had to follow the trail of bandits. She'd found Weiss too, and when they hugged, every inch of her burned. She had longed for contact with her teammates so badly that just a hug made her feel... whole. After the confrontation with her mother, she was back with everyone else... except Blake. Of course, seeing her little sister alive and well made her feel relief beyond compare, but she still felt that inescapable loneliness that had come with Blake's departure.

So, when they were all standing in Lionel's academy - Yang with the relic in hand after quite the confrontation with her mother - and she heard the word, "Yang," slip from her lips - those traitorous, beautiful lips - it took all of her restraint and willpower that she had built up in the past few months to not run up to her and... and do something. She wanted to yell at her, to throw something at her, to hug her, to... to kiss her. But ultimately, she remained silent, because all she really wanted was her team to be together again. Of course she would accept her back. It was for the good of the team.

Now they were here. With Blake looking at her like all the times Yang had looked at Blake back at Beacon. Yang had changed since the last time they had seen each other. She'd grown taller, had gotten more fit, had a much colder disposition. But she was still the same, and as much as she didn't want it, her heart melted at the sight of Blake Belladonna.

Yang hadn't stopped loving her.

After their little fiasco in the farm shed, when Yang thought that maybe, perhaps, Blake finally understood what Yang needed. No. She didn't. She didn't need a savior, or a protector. She needed a partner. Her partner.

"What is it?" Yang finally said, a little frustrated and annoyed that Blake wouldn't speak up on her own. She turned to her partner with an expectant look. Blake seemed surprised at getting caught somehow, and jumped a bit, her now exposed ears perking up. They quickly tilted downwards, matching her sheepish, flushed face.

"Sorry," she said. "You just look... different." She looked like she wanted to say something else, something more, but settled with "different". Yang wanted to squeeze it out of her.

"... Different?" The blonde arched an eyebrow at the choice of words.

"No, wait. Not in a bad way! I meant that, well, you just look," she paused, her eyes looking her teammate up and down. Yang could pinpoint the exact moment where Blake swallowed thickly and avoided her gaze. It almost made her angry how badly she wanted to kiss her. "Different," she finished lamely.

Yang snorted, rolling her eyes. "Thank you, that makes everything so much clearer." Her voice was laced heavily with sarcasm, but it wasn't venomous. Not in the slightest. It sounded almost playful, almost like the dry replies Blake used to give to Yang's puns and jokes. This caught Blake's attention, and she searched the blonde's face with hopeful eyes. Gorgeous golden eyes. And Yang still wanted to kiss Blake, so badly that she had to clench her fist until her nails bit into her palm.

Apparently, this was a sign to the faunus to move closer, and she sat next to the blonde, thighs barely touching. Blake's hand hovered near the prosthetic, looking at every detail, every inch, until she finally decided to hold the metallic hand. "Yang, I," she started, catching the attention of the girl in question. "I missed you," she said simply, lightly resting her forehead against the crook of Yang's neck.

So many things surged up in her mind at those three words. Anger, like why did she leave her in the first place? Why did she never call or send a letter or... Sadness. She probably meant that in the most platonic way possible. And of course, the feeling that won out was the strongest desire ever to wrap her arms around the girl and kiss her silly. She breathed in, closing her eyes. She could feel the flicker of faunus ears against her jaw, of Blake coming a bit closer, holding her hand tighter.

After a moment, Yang spoke up. Soft, so soft she barely heard herself, but she knew Blake would hear her. "I did too." More than you could ever know, Yang thought. She squeezed the warm hand that was in hers, and suddenly all the anger and frustration and loneliness seemed to melt away. It was concerning how easily her partner disarmed her, leaving her soft and shapeless in her hands.

I love you, I love you so much, the brawler wanted to declare out loud, so badly. Just as badly as she wants to kiss Blake.

She felt Blake pull away a little, felt those eyes on her again without having to open her own. She knew there was a smile on her face, and she couldn't bare to look at it. Didn't dare open her eyes lest she fall in love again.

Yang Xiao Long was defenseless.

Chapter Text

Yang had heard of them. Soul mates.

When two souls were connected, they had an unbreakable bond. No matter the distance, no matter the circumstance, two entwined souls would find their way back together.

Yang thought it was all some fairy tale at first. She thought she'd just… find someone, love them, and that was that.

But a word had crossed her mind when Blake had returned. Soul mate. When Blake had called her name, had been focused solely on Yang, despite the fact there was a room full of people that Blake cared about. It was almost selfish how good it made her feel. How it felt like part of her had returned, part of her soul had returned. Those thoughts burned the back of her mind, but as the night wore on and morning came along, they were put on the back burner.

Something else came over her.

Yang felt tired and restless all at once. Like when you spent a long day doing things but couldn’t fall asleep. Everything seemed slow and brown and gray and dull. She found herself lumbering through the house they had occupied. One look at her teammates indicated they felt the same. Except Ruby. The shining beacon of light. Ruby simply called everyone out so they could get going.

As misfortune would have it, through a chilling series of interactions (maybe it was partially Qrow's fault), Ruby dropped the relic into the well. She immediately yelled, insisting they had to retrieve it. Yang went along with a heavy sigh of reluctance, Weiss and Blake following as well.

When they reached the bottom, Ruby ran ahead to pick up the relic. Yang felt so… hazy. Uncomfortably so. She glanced at her teammates and they were practically swaying in place. Like they were asleep. Something in the back of Yang's mind was scared. Was alert. But it was suffocated by the thick pillow of apathy. Suddenly Ruby's scream pierced right through the haze and into Yang's mind. Her body immediately reacted, eyes wide and legs sprinting to the sound. Blake and Weiss soon followed, knowing their leader might be in peril.

That’s when they all saw it.

Yang could feel her heartbeat in her ears, and for a moment she was a little girl again. Watching Summer get lowered into the ground. That inescapable, all-consuming fear. Then the huntress instincts kicked in and they all ram, desperate to leave the structure. But that shrill, shrill scream of the Grimm it… she found herself on the ground.

Maria came soon after that, helping them up and out. She didn’t seem extremely affected, but it might’ve been because of her poor eye sight and poor hearing. After a series of running and falling, they finally made it towards the opening of a cellar. Yang was making her way up the stairs, Weiss behind her when the scream hit again.

She turned her head and Blake was so… so… so far behind.

She choked on her heart in her throat, lacking the energy necessary to call out. Those things were on her. Her eyes welled with tears and the image of Summer came back, watching Raven's back for the last time, her father's long sorrowed face. She was suffocating in her own fear. Blake was going to die and she hadn’t even told her how much she loved her. She couldn’t feel anything but that weight pulling her to the ground. She was sure some sound had come out of her.

“It’s… fine…”

Yang heard nothing but those words, hyper focused on Blake's existence. No! Yang wanted to scream. It wasn’t fine. She couldn’t breathe, couldn’t breathe, couldn’t-

Ruby's eyes flashed and suddenly she could move. The first thing Yang did was scramble up the stairs and bust open the door. There was time to breathe later. Her team followed soon after, and she scrambled through the house, a desperate feeling ramming into her chest. Blake. Where’s Blake? Where is she? Dust, why didn’t she go back? Blake could barely stand, why didn’t she go back? Why didn’t…

Her thought process was assuaged the moment Blake staggered into the room, and she felt her world be whole again for a moment.

She wasted no time in grabbing Blake's hand and running out of the house. Yang didn’t look back.

“I’m sorry, I’m so sorry,” Yang mumbled over and over, like an apologetic mantra. Blake seemed so shell-shocked that the words went right past her. It wasn’t even a few seconds later before The rest of their party left as well, the house alight in flames. Yang didn’t ask, didn’t think, just set Blake down on the back of her bike and revved it up. Everyone else soon followed and she drove off.

She kept her eyes on the snowy path before her but she felt those eyes on her again. Her heart hadn't stopped beating for a moment, and she was grateful that Blake's hadn't either.

Yang distracted herself by listening to Maria's story and explanation of what those things were. It left her feeling even more uneasy. They could’ve all died. Ruby, Weiss, Qrow, Maria, Oscar… Blake. God, Blake almost died. She silently cried, her heart wrenching so tightly she could feel nothing else. It was mostly silent for the rest of the way, but light conversation filled the awkward gaps.

Before Yang could tell, they were in a town, and she could hear Nora, and things felt warmer. Once they regrouped Yang felt better, if only marginally. She felt Blake sidle up beside her as they made their way to Jaune's newly introduced sister's house. She felt cold fingers lace with her left hand. Blake was alive. Yang thought she realized how much life meant to her after she herself almost died. But now she truly understood that life was precious. She turned her head, looked into those scared, golden eyes.

Yang cried then.

She saw her soul reflected in those eyes. Her world, her love, her everything. She had never felt the crushing weight of… this.

For a moment it seemed like Blake didn’t understand. Like it was a reprise of the farm shed. But with everyone away, the world narrowed to just them. Blake hugged her so tightly it felt like she was trying to crawl under skin, reach the very center of her being and stay there.

Yang wanted her to.

She never wanted to let go, crushing Blake to her body. She touched everywhere her hands could respectfully and appropriately reach. She touched Blake's face, her neck, her shoulders, her back, her hair… She couldn’t get enough, gripping the back of Blake's arms hard enough to hurt. But her partner didn’t care, hugging her back with just as much fervor.

I love you, Yang wanted to say more than anything. But Blake beat her to the punch in her own way.

“I’m so happy I’m alive with you,” Blake said, and suddenly Yang couldn’t feel her legs, knees ready to let go.

The brawler pulled away shakily, resting her forehead against Blake's. They were breathing each other in, eyes looking at every miniscule detail. Blake's hands curled around Yang's jaw and cheeks, and Yang closed her eyes. She felt Blake pull away and immediately press her forehead to her pulse. It was a silent confirmation. You’re alive.

Their moment was cut short by their teammates calling them in to the Cotta-Arc household. Blake's hand stayed in hers until everyone else was around. Made it better, made it feel like what they just shared was private. A silent affair between the two of them. After the first satisfying dinner in a long time, they all went to rest.

Yang was settling down on the floor, ready to close her eyes and rest, when she felt a body slide against her. She knew who it was without opening her eyes. Her soul recognized Blake's soul before her mind did. She couldn’t help how perfectly their bodies fit, despite whatever uneven crook or edge was in the way. Yang didn’t hesitate to pull Blake close despite the faunus being as close as physically possible already. Her back was to Yang's chest, and her head rested on her extended arm.

She breathed and all she could smell was Blake, opened her eyes and all she saw was inky black hair, reached out and all she could feel was Blake.

Yang felt choked up all of a sudden, fighting off another wave of tears. All the anger she had felt at Blake's departure had melted away. It was obvious Blake didn't even want to part ways with her for the length of a night's sleep. The fear that her partner would up and leave her again was present, it might always be, but it was being drowned out by Blake's words and actions and… and her very existence.

Yang fell asleep with Blake filling every single one of her senses. They'd have to talk, but that could wait another day.