Chapter Text
The Statesman floated ever closer to Earth- it would not be long, now, before they were within range to speak to Earth’s representatives and let them know about the 4500 refugees heading their way. Thor was excited. He was more cheerful now than he’d been on their whole, long journey. Bruce was in good spirits as well- he’d transformed back into himself about a week after Asgard burned, and he’d been looking forward to finally wearing his own clothes and sleeping in his own bed, and maybe groveling some at Nat’s feet for the Hulk disappearing both of them off into Space for two years. In fact, there was only one person on the Statesman who wasn’t abuzz with excitement… Loki.
Loki, if anything, had grown increasingly agitated as their journey drew to a close. While Thor seemed happy to forget it, Loki remembered that he would be unlikely to be welcome on Midgard. There, he was a war criminal, a villain of legend. Humans had short lives, but long memories- not enough time had passed for his past there to be irrelevant. Thor may have thought that the Midgardian’s regard for him would allow his dark little brother to pass onto the planet unscathed but… Earth’s Mightiest Heroes had a grudge against him. More than that, that second-rate sorcerer with the sad little beard would likely drop him through a portal to Odin only knew where the moment he stepped foot on the planet, and then Loki would be forced to kill the man, and murder was not the best way to endear a people to a planet.
Clearly, his brother needed a reality check.
Loki strode regally onto the bridge of the ship, bypassing Heimdall, stepping over Miek and waving off the Valkyrie, who was passing a bottle of… something between herself and Korg. Thor and Bruce were standing by the great window, with Bruce exclaiming excitedly about the planet Saturn passing by and Thor chuckling, ever indulgent of his mortal friends.
“Your Majesty,” Loki said formally. “I would speak with you.”
Thor turned his one good eye to regard his younger brother.
“Such formality, brother? What are you up to? It’s not necessary.”
“What I am up to, brother, is a bit of forethought that you apparently do not intend to engage in. And the formality may not be necessary in this moment, but it will be soon. You may as well get used to it.” Loki admonished, then turned his attention to Bruce, who was looking nervously between him and Thor. “I believe your input would be valuable as well, Doctor Banner. If we three may speak privately?”
Thor and Bruce shared a look, then Thor nodded and led them all to a storage area which had become the King’s “office.” It was cramped, but they could at least all stand without touching one another, and it afforded them privacy.
“What is it, then?” Thor asked, leaning back against the wall with an air of little concern.
“You have surely noticed that our journey is coming to an end—we are nearly within communication range of Earth.” Thor nodded, and opened his mouth to speak, but Loki held up a hand. “May I inquire as to what your approach to the situation will be?”
“Well, I shall attempt to raise Stark—he is most likely to be able to receive our call. He and Fury will be able to find us a place to land—”
“And you’re certain we will be allowed to land, are you?” Loki interjected, brows raised high.
“Of course!” Thor frowned. “I told you, they love me on Earth.”
“Yes, Thor, they love you. I imagine they will be somewhat more ambivalent towards thousands of refugees and the villain that once laid siege to one of their greatest cities. Humans may be short lived—no offense to present company intended, of course,” Loki turned briefly to Bruce, who shrugged, arms crossed, “but their memories are not so short as to have forgotten the damage I did years ago.”
“He’s right, you know. I mean, it’s been a couple of years, but immigration was sort of a hot button topic when I left. When the Hulk left, I mean.” Bruce turned to Thor. “And the team can do a lot of things, but I’m not sure they can just negotiate a small country’s worth of space for you. And that’s leaving out the complication of, well…” Bruce waved a hand at Loki. “I think we have to be realistic here. People are going to want him to be locked up or something. They’re not really gonna care about any recent heroic turns or, like… tragic backstories.”
“And I’ve no intention of being locked up.” Loki said firmly. “I’ve had enough of that. Nor do I intend to prostrate myself before that wannabe sorcerer—”
“Wait, who?” Bruce wanted to know, but Loki waved him off, gazing intensely at his brother.
“You need a plan, Thor. A diplomatic approach. For the sake of our people, I will be on my best behavior. I have given you the Tesseract, my best means of escape. I am prepared to stand at your side. But you may not be able to stand at mine- not at first. So I ask again—what will you do when we reach Earth’s airspace?”
Thor’s plan, as it turned out, was only slightly changed by Loki’s concerns. He still intended to approach Stark first, but he would get the lay of the land first. Rather than approaching Earth directly, The Statesman would hover in the vicinity of Mars. Heimdall and Loki would work together to access the Bifrost and send Bruce and Thor to Earth, where they could speak to Stark personally, get him and the rest of the Avengers on their side before what was left of Asgard made its approach. To Loki’s surprise, Thor decided that he needed his younger brother’s input to prepare for this meeting.
“They are my friends and shield brothers, but I am no diplomat. Whatever pretense you may have been using… it is you that was King for four years, not me. I need your skills. You kept Asgard and the realms in relative peace… the statue and plays were weird, though.” Thor said, nudging Loki’s shoulder. Loki stabbed him in the side with a pen, and then began to draft an address suitable for a King. “Perhaps less stabbing while we establish ourselves, brother.”
And so Thor and Bruce were teleported unsteadily to Earth, Loki’s address in hand. They came to rest outside the Avenger’s compound. They entered, and FRIDAY addressed them immediately.
“Welcome back, Point-Break and Doctor Banner. I will notify the boss that you are here. Please wait in the front room.”
When Tony came out to greet them, Thor and Bruce were both startled to find him looking more tired than they’d ever seen him.
“Nice of you two to drop by. I guess there’s a couple of long stories to share around the campfire?”
And so they sat, soon joined by Rhodey, and exchanged each other’s news.
“Wait, you’re saying I disappear for two years and everything goes to shit? What the hell, Tony?” Bruce exclaimed.
“Save your what the hell for after my what the hell, Bruce. How many homicidal siblings do you have, Thor? And what do you mean you’ve ‘brought Asgard to Earth’ do you mean you have literally a planet full of super powered people that you want to drop off in my backyard because that isn’t going to—”
“On the contrary, Stark, what remains of Asgard is less than the number of people that would fill one of your smaller cities, and most nowhere near as powerful as I. And anyway, technically Hela is dead and Loki has been really well behaved lately, so my homicidal siblings are not as numerous as you might—”
“Okay, okay, pump the breaks there, King Thunder. ‘Loki has been really well behaved lately’ is your standard for if we can trust him even being on this planet? And you’re okay with this? Seriously, you’re sitting there wearing my clothes and acting like this is okay, are you gonna back me up here or what?” Tony turned to Bruce, gesticulating wildly. Bruce shifted uncomfortably, tugging a bit at the too-short sleeves of the jacket he was wearing.’
“Look, Tony, leaving Loki and his history aside for now… what I know is that there are about 4500 people who have been trapped for almost two months on a space ship that some overpowered megalomaniac used to use for orgies, who have just lost their home and everything they’ve known. It’s been tight quarters, a whole bunch of technical difficulties that I could not just ‘throw one of my PHDs at,’” and here Bruce shot a small glare at Thor, who rubbed the back of his neck awkwardly, “And some how we all made it here. No one tried to kill anybody. Hell, even the Hulk didn’t smash anyone, and no one was awful to him. We made it here. Because it’s the best hope they have, Tony. And without Loki… I don’t think anyone would have made it off Asgard. In fact, there’s a good chance that Hela could have brought herself, her zombies, and her giant goddamn wolf here if Loki hadn’t shown up when he did and given us all a way to escape, so that, y’know, we could blow up the source of her power.”
“The source of her power being a planet.” Tony stated, one eyebrow raised.
“Well, it was actually pretty flat for a planet, I don’t know what we’d classify it as—”
“Yes, Stark, the source of my sister’s power came from the Realm Eternal itself. My father explained as much before he died. And so it became necessary to destroy our home. But Asgard is not a place—it is a people. And right now, those people need your help. As your friend, I am asking- I need the Avengers.” Thor finished, looking at Tony in earnest.
“Tony…” Rhodey said, taking in the pure stress on Tony’s face. Tony waved him off.
“Look, this isn’t even… I don’t make these kinds of decisions, okay? That’s what the U.N. is for, that’s why I signed the Accords. There aren’t any Avengers any more. There’s just me, Rhodes, a couple of possible friends in retirement, and a bunch of fugitives.”
“Tony.” Rhodey said more firmly, while Bruce’s eyes opened wide and Thor looked discouraged.
“What? What do you want from me, Rhodey? I’m not a king, I’m not a god, I am a man in a suit trying to keep the peace and have some accountability.” Tony snapped. Then he looked at Thor, and sighed. “Look, just… I’ll speak to Ross, alright? I’ll get you in front of the UN council and you can make your case, and I’ll push it through so you can at least let your people camp out over here in shifts so they can get some fresh air. That’s all I can promise. But your psycho brother needs to stay away from here. Away from the planet, in fact, maybe away from the entire solar system.” When Thor opened his mouth to object, Tony held up his hand. “Beggars can’t be choosers, Point Break. And right now, you’re begging. So figure out what to do with him, because I’m not touching it with a 10 foot pole.”
What Thor had to do, he decided, was get more perspective. Leaving Bruce and the address Loki’d drafted with Tony to begin the negotiations process, Thor asked Heimdall to help him seek out Steve Rogers.
When he found Steve, it was in a run-down motel in a small town in Italy. He was surprised and pleased to see Thor, and invited him in to sit at the small table the room provided and share some coffee. Thor went through the same rote explanation of events that he’d given Tony, explaining that he’d left Bruce at the compound soothing Tony’s ruffled feathers. Steve was, as always, an excellent listener, making sympathetic noises in all the right places and not staring at the patch over Thor’s missing eye. He let out a low whistle when Thor wound down by explaining the refugee crisis he’d brought to Earth’s doorstep.
“That’s going to be a rough run, bud.” Steve commented, leaning back in his chair. “I would help, but Tony probably told you that I’m currently… out of favor with the world powers. I’m not Captain America anymore.” Steve gestured to the bed, where his uniform lay, darker and dirtier than Thor remembered and with the star at the center of the chest torn off, leaving only an imprint behind. “I’m a Nomad now.”
Thor nods, going to rub a hand over his bereaved eye before thinking better of it- he can almost hear Loki now, telling him to quit picking at it. He gazes around the room with his one good eye before turning back to his friend.
“I am sorry that I was not here. Perhaps I could have brokered peace between you all… although, perhaps not. Peace talks were never my strong point. I would just hit something with my hammer to get my way. It’s Loki that has the silver tongue.” Steve frowns at the name, and Thor meets his gaze steadily. “It is why I need my brother now. I am King, and all the responsibility to my people rests upon my shoulders. I had abdicated, previously. I preferred to travel, to be here on Midgard with you all, with Jane. I was not ready for the throne. I still am not ready, but now I have no choice. If I am to rule well, I will need a sharp mind at my right hand— and no one’s is sharper than my brother’s, when he is well.”
“And when he’s not well?” Steve asks quietly. They both sit in silence for a moment before Thor leans forward—exhausted, Steve thinks.
“I do not know, friend Steve. As it stands, he tried to kill me—but he has done that in the past, and I’m not sure he’s ever really meant it—he has betrayed me, which he has not done in the past, not until the last decade, at any rate, and he has saved my people. He kept peace on our ship in impossible situations, at my side. He handed over the tesseract into my keeping, though he could have kept on as he was and I never would have known he had it—”
“Wait, the Tesseract? You’ve brought it back to Earth?” Steve interrupted, suddenly alarmed.
“Ah, technically speaking it is in the vicinity of Mars at the moment. It was in Asgard’s vault at the time of Ragnarok, and Loki used it to save himself. He kept it secret for longer than I would have liked, but that he came clean at all is a goof sign, is it not?” Thor looks hopeful, but at the same time some measure of the optimism is forced. Steve nods slowly.
“So do you think Loki will betray you again?”
“Most likely. It is in his nature—he is not the God of Mischief and Chaos without reason, you know. The nature of that betrayal—I hope, I pray to the Norns that it is some small mischief, as of old. You have only known him as the villain he was in New York, though I believe that that particular attack was not his own idea. In hindsight, it was too poorly thought out to be one of Loki’s own plans, and he was not in his right mind then. When we were younger, Loki was often mischievous to the point of his own detriment, but he was never cruel or careless of the lives of others as he was that day. At the time, I could not see past my own anger to realize he was not himself.” Thor narrowed his single eye at Steve, searching his face for something. “I hear that you know what it is, to have a loved one so out of control.”
Steve exhaled through his nose, his mouth twitching.
“Bucky. He was my best friend, before the serum. I thought I lost him during the war, before the ice. Turns out he wasn’t as dead as I thought.”
“Ah. I know the feeling.” Thor nodded sagely, sipping his coffee.
“Hydra got a hold of him. Brainwashed him. He did a whole bunch of awful stuff. He… he killed Tony’s parents. But it wasn’t him. It was the Soldier. I couldn’t… I couldn’t let them take him away, punish him for something he couldn’t help. Maybe I could have talked it out better, but at the time… keeping him safe was all I could think of, you know?”
“I think I do.” Thor leaned forward on his arms. “Tony says that he will do his best to help my people, but not if Loki is involved in the deal. Not yet. I need to figure out how to keep my brother safe, Steve. He will be on his best behavior, so he says, and I believe him sincere, but he will not consent to be locked away in a prison. Nor could I in good conscience allow it again—he has paid his share in time and blood.” Thor sighed. “But I must do what is right for my people; all of my people.”
“Of course.” Steve agreed. Thor gave him a shrewd look, and Steve cleared his throat, glancing away for a moment… and then, having come to a decision, glancing back.
“Look, try talking to King T’Challa of Wakanda. They’re a quiet, secretive people and an incredibly advanced country. T’Challa has a good heart, and his people are strong. Between the medical technology and the defensive systems, I don’t think there’s a better place on Earth. It’s where Bucky is.”
Thor leaned back, nodding in consideration. He gestured for Steve to continue, and there was something oddly regal in the gesture—something that made Steve realize for keeps that he was not just talking to his super powered friend, but to a King.
“Make your case to T’Challa and his council. I can help you get an audience with them. I’m not making any guarantees but… from the sound of it, Loki and Bucky aren’t as different as I would have thought. And if I’m going to stand for something, I stand for it whole heartedly. We both have to look out for our brothers, right? They… they deserve a chance to redeem themselves. To be themselves. Don’t they?”
Thor gave Steve a warm smile and a clap on the shoulder.
“They do indeed, my friend. If you could make the arrangements for me, I would be most grateful.”
Only a few hours later, Thor found himself being led to T’Challa’s throne room by women in red, with spears in hand. Steve followed behind him, a steady presence at his back. If all went well, Loki could abide here for a time, while everything else got sorted. They entered a large, round room, where an array of people sat in a semi circle, with the man that must be King T’Challa seated on a throne in the middle. Thor greeted the man as a fellow royal, with a hand clasped over his heart and a polite bow. T’Challa rose from his throne and gave a similar greeting, and welcomed him to Wakanda with a warm voice. He then greeted Steve as he would an old friend, and then settled back into his throne to hear Thor’s case.
Thor found himself unsure of where to start, repeating the basics that he’d given Steve and Tony of the destruction of his home, and the complicated diplomatic situation with the Asgardian refugees and his brother.
“Correct me if I am wrong, King Thor, but I am given to understand that your brother executed an act of terrorism in America some years ago, and has not paid for his crimes.”
Thor fought the urge to fidget, remembering lessons from so many centuries ago—A king must stand firm, a king must be confident. A king must not doubt his purpose.
A brother must defend his brother.
“It is somewhat more complicated than that, Your Grace.” He said, and then Thor launched into explanations about the Infinity Stones, and how four had surfaced on Earth in only the past few years, and how he believed, from the little he could get from Loki, that the attack on New York was not Loki’s sort of venture, not on his own.
“To be frank, King T’Challa, if my brother had in truth meant to conquer this world, and had all of his wits and reasons about him while attempting to do so, we’d not have known about it until he succeeded. Instead, he purposefully gathered the mightiest people on the planet and made it tremendously obvious what he intended to do… and in truth, Your Highness, my brother possesses great magic. He used only a fraction of it during the battle. I am not saying that he let us win,” Thor said quickly, turning to Steve, who was frowning, “I am merely saying… that he hoped to lose. There are greater powers in the universe than I, or even Odin All-father. I believe my brother fell into the thrall of one of those powers- a Titan. He will not speak much of it, but I know it troubles his sleep.”
“If what you say is so, you still ask much of Wakanda.” A woman who’d been introduced as T’Challa’s mother, Ramonda, spoke up. “You ask us to hide a criminal whose power may be a danger to us and our people.”
“Queen Ramonda, T’Challa, if I may.” Steve stepped forth, hands clasped behind his back, ever the soldier. “I fought alongside Thor in New York. I also had a difficult time with Thor’s claim that Loki would not be a threat. But I’ve gotta point out… you’re already hiding criminals. You’re hiding me, and Bucky. I appreciate the risks you’ve taken to do so. Bucky can be dangerous, if he’s not in his right mind, but your people have helped make him less of a risk, and more himself. Princess Shuri saved my best friend… my brother. I think you are more than capable of doing the same for Loki. And if he tries anything, well…” Steve looked at Thor apologetically, but then returned his gaze to the royal family. “I think we can handle it.”
Thor looked hopefully at T’Challa, who stared at both he and Steve with a sort of cat-like intensity, before exchanging a look with his mother and then gracefully standing. He waved his hand, and the women around him- the Dora Milaje, they were called—stood at attention.
“Bring your brother here. Let him speak for himself. And then we shall see if we have a place for him.”
After a few moments of Thor communicating with Heimdall, Thor lead the royal family out into the courtyard and bade them to stand back. There was a flash of light and the smell of burnt grass, and Loki was standing there before them, tottering a moment before finding his proper footing.
“A lack of access to the Bi-Frost direct has made our watcher’s landings far less gentle, Thor, did you notice?” Loki said, addressing his brother first before turning his head to the strangers behind him. “The royal family of Wakanda, I take it? I am Loki, of Asgard. It is an honor.” And Loki swept into a graceful bow, bobbing up to meet the eyes of a wary Steve Rogers.
“And the Captain as well. My, my, this is quite a reception.” Loki’s smile was all teeth, a warning glance from Thor barely phasing him. “I understand that you have offered your hospitality while my brother attends his kingly duties.”
“That is yet to be decided.” T’Challa said firmly. He considered Loki. “Your reputation proceeds you, trickster.”
“It often does.” Loki shrugged. “To change the past is impossible—or at the very least, it is generally unwise. What would you have me do?”
“Your brother seems to believe that you were not of your own mind when you attacked New York. I would have you tell us if this is the truth, or a mark of his love for you.” T’Challa said, arms crossed in front of him.
“I would say it may well be both—what reason have you to believe me?” But after another pleading look from Thor, Loki relented. “The truth, Your Highness, is that my brother is a sentimental fool—but he knows me well. I will admit that my time in New York is… something of a blur. I had two Infinity Stones close at hand, both of which affected the minds of those in close and prolonged contact. I will not willingly speak of what brought me to Earth that day, but for the sake of my brother and my people, left homeless by the Death Goddess herself, I will pledge upon my troth that while I am here on Earth, I will do harm to no human, unless in the direst need of self-defense. I will pledge upon my troth that I will not knowingly commit any act to the detriment of Wakanda or her people. Will you hear my pledge, King T’Challa, and bind me to it?”
Thor was gaping at his brother- such a pledge was not made lightly, and he is quite certain that those words had never left Loki’s lips. He could not help but speak.
“Are you certain, brother?” And Loki turned to him with a scowl.
“I would not speak so if I were not certain. Do we not need this, Thor? Are our people not desperate? Is this not the only way to ensure peace, to keep me out of some thrice-damned cell and in a position to be your right hand, should you need me? Or do you think I risk life and magic on a whim?”
“To pledge upon your troth, we do not have such customs here.” T’Challa said. “What does it mean? How will this pledge mean more than any other from your lips?”
“If my brother makes a pledge upon his troth, and breaks it… his magic would turn in on itself. It is a fate worse than death, and his soul would not walk in Valhalla at the end.” Thor said numbly, still staring at Loki in amazement.
“As my brother says. Though now that we have killed the death goddess herself… who knows, what will come of my soul? At any rate, if you will hear my pledge, I will make it. My life on the line for the good of Asgard. I believe that, at least, is a sentiment with which all of us here are familiar.” Loki said, his piercing gaze sweeping over the royal family and Steve. T’Challa looked at his mother, who gestured as if to say “It’s up to you,” and then over to Steve, who met his gaze and then nodded his approval.
“Very well, then. I shall hear your pledge.” T’Challa ruled. Loki bowed his head in gratitude, and Thor let out a breath he hadn’t realized he was holding. Loki knelt where he was and then—
“Wait a minute!” A teenage girl rushed forward, a screen hovering above a bracelet of beads on her wrist. She belonged to the royal family, Thor guessed.
“Shuri…” Ramonda sighed, and Thor started, realizing this was the princess that had helped Steve’s friend.
“For research purposes, Mother.” Shuri insisted. “I wonder if there will be a change that I can record as the pledge is taken. This sort of magic, it is new.”
Loki smiled at the girl from where he knelt on the ground, a smile that was less toothy and more genuine.
“She is curious, brother, like Banner, and your Jane. I wonder if all mortals are so. I do not mind. Do your research, young one. I too am interested in what you pick up with your device.”
Shuri grinned and inched closer, taking readings of Loki, of Thor, of the singed grass, and of her brother rolling his most royal eyes.
“Well go on, pledge away.” She chirped. Loki’s face became serious, and after a glance at Thor, he placed his hand over his heart.
“I, Loki, Prince of Asgard, Rightful Heir to the throne of Jotunheim, God of Mischief, Odinson, hereby pledge upon my troth that while I am on Earth I will do harm to no human, unless it is to save my life or the life of my brethren. I will take no action and speak no silver words that would be to the detriment of Wakanda, or to her people. This I pledge. Do you hear this pledge, T’Challa, King?”
Fascinated, T’Challa nodded. “I hear it.”
“And do you accept it?”
“I do.”
There was the faintest golden glow around Loki, and it swirled around him, just barely touching T’Challa. Then it receded, and Loki stood, brushing grass from his knees and pushing his long hair behind his ears.
“It is done, then. Are you satisfied?” T’Challa nodded and Shuri was already twirling away, saying that she had to get the recording to her lab, disregarding all protocol about taking her leave from visiting royalty. T’Challa shook his head after her, then turned to address his guests once more.
“As Captain Rogers pointed out, I am already harboring a fugitive. It seems only fitting that my second fugitive stays in the same spot. I have matters to attend to, but I’m certain you can escort Prince Loki to Sgt. Barnes’ farmhouse, can you not, Steve?”
“You want them to stay together?” Steve sputtered.
“Will that be a problem?”
“Uh… no, sir. No problem, just surprised me.” Steve said, casting a vaguely suspicious eye in Loki’s direction.
“Very well then. I will leave you to it.” T’Challa bowed his head to Thor, and walked away, speaking with his mother. Steve cleared his throat, and then gestured at Thor and Loki.
“Might as well follow me, I guess.”
Steve led the brothers to a trolley that carried them away from the city, to a group of farms. From there they walked to the furthest one, where a man with long brown hair and a single arm stood feeding an apple to a horse.
“How you doin’ Buck?” Steve called, and the man called Bucky turned to face them, smiling.
“Not bad, considering I’m what- 100 years old- and still working the farm.” The one arm wrapped around Steve in a hug, which Steve returned heartily. Blue eyes peeked over Steve’s shoulder and locked with green. Bucky pulled away gently.
“You brought friends?”
“Well,” Steve began, only to be cut off by Loki.
“I believe a more appropriate term is roommates- at least as far as I’m concerned. Sargent Barnes, I presume?” Loki asked, one regal brow arched high on his forehead. “Or do you prefer ‘Bucky’?”
“Uh… Bucky. My name is Bucky. I’m sorry, you said something about room mates?”
“Mm. Like you, I am… perceived unkindly by the governments of your world. While my brother here goes about his Kingly duty and gets that all sorted, I believe you and I will be sharing quarters. Oh, what a handsome horse!” Loki then blew past Steve and Bucky and laid his hand on the horse’s face, looking quite content.
“Um….”
“I’m sorry about this, Buck, it’s only for a while. He’s gonna be on his best behavior okay? One foot out of line…”
“And you’ll fight him in an alley behind the theater?” Bucky smiled. “Relax, Steve. I’m a big boy, you know. Always have been, in fact, unlike some.”
Steve punched Bucky’s shoulder, and introduced him to Thor. The three made conversation until Thor had to take his leave.
“Thank you, Steve, and you, Bucky, for looking after my brother. I will return as soon as my duties allow.” He raised his voice. “Loki, I am leaving now.”
Loki did not look up from the complicated braid he was plaiting into the horse’s mane. “Good riddance, then.”
Thor sighed, then smirked.
“Hopefully when I return, you will not be in foal.”
“Thor, I will stab you.”
“Not until you’ve made a better impression on these people, brother. Be well.”
With that, Steve and Thor took their leave, leaving Bucky alone with an extremely handsome alien-god-person braiding his horse’s mane.
Well, Bucky thought, I’m sure stranger things have happened.