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She was here. She was really here. And she was not leaving, Cris told herself.
Joana came to her. She broke up with Eloy and came to her. That had to mean something. Except she had already said it once only for Cris to find her in his arms again.
Cris hated feeling this nervous about someone because it meant admitting you were vulnerable.
That’s the reason why she didn’t want to fall in love with anyone in the first place. Because falling in love, just like Joana herself said, included suffering. And Cris suffered when Joana wasn’t there. She suffered when Joana ignored her. She suffered most of all every time she saw her with Eloy.
With a sigh, Cris turned on her bed once again, facing Joana. The girl was sleeping, her breath slowed down and the purple hair was spread on Cris’ pillow.
Despite the turmoil of emotions going on inside her heart, Cris couldn’t help but smile at the sight.
Joana mostly definitely looked like a mess, but she also never looked more beautiful. Cris felt like the luckiest person in the world for being able to see her like that. Joana, just like Cris, didn’t like being vulnerable, but she was starting to realize the girl did exactly that today.
When Cris sent the text claiming they should stop talking unless Joana broke up with Eloy, with an overly excited Eva and a cautious Amira by her side, she had no hopes of actually getting a reaction out of Joana.
She was proved wrong when Joana appeared in her door. Cris thought she wouldn’t know what to do once she finally saw Joana (after not so politely kicking the girls out in the middle of her panicking), but the moment their eyes met, everything seemed to fall into place. Cris pulled her closer and allowed herself to get lost in Joana.
Only now, in the darkness of her room, Cris realized Joana had taken a huge risk with her. She didn’t know what could be expecting her when Cris opened the door, but she did it anyway.
Cris knew that this didn’t solve all of their problems and that it didn’t mean things would work out between them, but it looked like a great start despite all of their ups and downs. It looked like the start of something great.
Cris hoped with all of her heart that it was.
Joana moved on her sleep, throwing an arm over Cris’ waist, pulling her closer. Cris giggled quietly, carefully tucking some hair behind Joana’s ear. Joana somehow got even closer and buried her head in the crook of Cris’ neck. Cris held her tighter.
With a second thought, Cris decided to relax her hold of Joana a bit, fearing she would wake the girl up.
“Don’t let go.” Joana whispered so quietly Cris wouldn’t have heard if they weren’t so close.
“I won’t,” Cris assured, smiling at Joana.
Cris felt more than saw the grin on her face when she put her arms around Joana’s waist, making the girl comfortable.
Maybe this time Joana wouldn’t break her heart. Maybe it was really the start of something great.
One way or the other, Cris knew that even if everything went to hell tomorrow, it would have been worth it. Because there’s no other place she would rather be than by Joana’s side.