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“How come I’ve been assigned babysitting?” Sirius sighed, his legs propped up on the coffee table, the rest of his body spread out over the armchair in the Potters’ cosy living room.
“You’re not babysitting, I’m older than you.” Lily huffed, positioning herself on the arm of the chair, a cup of tea clutched in her hands. She groaned as the baby kicked again, closing her eyes to hide the pain.
“Well excuse me, but isn’t there a baby inside your tummy currently?” Sirius exclaimed, raising an eyebrow. “And who’s making sure that baby doesn’t just pop out any minute now?” He lightly punched Lily’s thigh which was positioned beside him. “Therefore, I am babysitting.” He finished his point, crossing his arms over his chest and sighing.
“Well trust me, as much as I love you so much Sirius, there are other people who I’d rather have here, in case said baby does just pop out any minute now.” Lily announced, taking a big gulp of her tea. “For example,” she swallowed her drink, the liquid scorching her throat, “Remus.”
“What about James?” Sirius questioned, looking up at the red head confused.
“Hm, he’s about as useful as chocolate teapot when it comes to the baby.”
“Chocolate teapot?” Sirius began to question.
“It’s a muggle phrase. The point is it that he has literally no idea how having a child works, he didn’t even realise the baby grew inside of me, I think he just assumed it appeared.” She placed her mug on the table, swatting Sirius’ feet off it while doing so.
“Wait, the baby grows inside of you!?” Sirius looked up at her, panic in his eyes.
“Merlin’s beard…” Lily looked away shaking her head. “I’m officially surrounded by idiots.” A sudden pain hit the girl, causing her to wince, which of course her friend noticed.
“You good Lils?” Sirius questioned, pulling himself up out of his slouch. She nodded in response, biting her lip.
“Yeah yeah, I’m good. Ignore me, he’s just kicking.” She grimaced.
“So, you think Sirius Jr is going to be a Quidditch player when he’s older?” The boy changed the topic, placing his feet up onto the coffee table once again.
“Sirius Jr?” Lily scoffed. “You’ve got to be kidding me?”
“James agreed!” He laughed. “Ask him.” The boy summoned a bottle of muggle beer from Lily’s kitchen with his wand, taking a sip slowly.
“Sure he did-” The pain hit her again. No no no no no no no no, not right now baby. You aren’t doing this right now; don’t you dare. Lily begged internally, placing a protective hand over her stomach.
“Lils?” She looked down to see the boy was reaching for her hand. “You sure you’re good?”
She nodded. “I’m going to take a shower, get your feet off my bloody coffee table otherwise I’ll hex them off you!” She hissed, pulling herself up off the chair.
“Yes ma’am. God, it’s like living with Minnie…” He laughed, turning to hang his legs over the arm of the armchair instead, sipping the beer.
“Watch it mister…” Lily scolded, pointing her wand at him. A smirk played across her lips, as the boy turned his attention to the tv, which was currently showing ‘Alien’ the film. Lily flicked her wand, sending a purple flash towards the boy, whose braided hair (done by Lily herself) suddenly became full of flowers. She giggled turning away, placing her wand in her back pocket.
“I wouldn’t keep that in there if I were you, I know someone who scorched their arse once because they kept their wand in their pocket. Also thanks for the flowers, they totally suit me of course.” Lily whipped around to see the boy’s eyes still glued to the tv. She laughed before hobbling towards the stairs.
However, before the girl began to mount the staircase, the now excruciating pain returned. She gripped the banister, her knuckles turning white. Closing her eyes, Lily dropped her head, biting her lip hard. Suddenly the pain stopped, allowing the girl to regain her posture. Before she moved though she felt something completely different and very new. “S-sirius…” She stuttered, looking down at her jeans, which were wet. “I think my water just broke…”
“Eh? Call one of those tap people… I don’t know how to fix plumbing.” The boy stated, his eyes still glued to the screen.
The red head whipped round, placing her hand over her baby bump. “Sirius!” She screeched. “I don’t need a bloody plumber. I need the hospital!” She cried, limping over to her friend.
“The hospital? What are they going to do? Bandage your taps together?” He finally pulled his eyes away from the film, looking over at his pregnant friend. “Blimey Lils, did you wet yourself or something?” He laughed, remembering that one time Peter pissed himself from laughing too much at drunk Prongs.
Lily’s patience was beginning to grow very thin, her eyes narrowing to glare at the boy, who immediately stopped laughing. “No you prat. My water broke…” She seethed.
“Meaning…”The boy began to question however stopped as he finally realised what that meant. “The baby’s on its way.” He finished, pulling himself up to sit up straight.
She nodded, frowning even more. “Hence why I need the bloody hospital and not the fucking plumbers!” She continued, her voice rising with every word. “So are you going to help me?” She growled, trying to stay calm as a slight contraction hit her. She watched as the boy leapt up, gripping his wand. She looked around the room. Sirius had almost frozen, like someone had hit pause. One would have assumed he might have fallen asleep upright (which has happened before to the boy) if weren’t for his occasional blink. “Sirius!” She cried. “Anytime soon would be helpful.”
He shook his head, sprinting upstairs suddenly. Lily shook her head. “Why couldn’t I have Remus on the one day I actually have the baby… Or even James. Hell even Peter would be more helpful than this twerp.” She spoke lightly, leaning against the back of the sofa. She turned her head and watched the long haired boy charge down the staircase, clutching an overnight bag tightly.
“Come on Lilykins, let’s go and have a baby.” He grabbed her hand before pulling her outside fiercely, slamming the front door shut behind them. He heaved her over to his motorbike, throwing her bag into the foot well of the sidecar he installed recently for Remus’ sake. “In you get.” He held his hand out to help her in.
Lily laughed. “No way. I am not getting in that death trap with you, especially as you’re currently slightly intoxicated.”
“Well, it’s this or apparating. Your choice.” He shrugged, placing his hands on his hips.
“Or, we call a taxi.” She added, reaching into her pocket for her muggle phone.
“Nu uh, think of the traffic!” Sirius snatched her phone away, throwing it over his shoulder. Lily sighed as she heard the screen smash.
“Well done you complete idiot!” She raised her arms angrily, crying out in pain as another contraction hit her.
“Motorbike or apparating?” Sirius ignored her, spinning his bike key around his finger quickly.
“For Merlin’s sake!” She grabbed Sirius’ hand, putting her weight onto him as she clambered into the sidecar of the bike. He fist pumped the air before sprinting around to the bike, throwing one leg over. After starting the engine and pulling his goggles over his eyes (but of course no helmet because ‘where’s the fun in that and of course I may be sexy as hell, but I don’t think even helmet hair would suit me! No Moony, appearance is much more important than safety. What’s life without a bit of risk eh?’), Sirius looked down at his smaller friend.
“Welcome ladies and gentleman to Black’s Bike. Please may I ask you keep all hands, arms and feet inside the vehicle at all times, unless of course I tell you otherwise. Please ensure your seatbelt is fastened tightly…” Lily sighed and looked down to realise there was so safety belt. “Hah! Jokes! There aren’t any seatbelts. Let’s go!” He revved the engine before pulling away quickly, Lily gripping onto the front of the car as tightly as possible as it seemed Sirius had no idea how the road system worked, and was just speeding through the busy roads.
“Sirius, slow down! I’d like to get to St Mungos in one piece preferably.” The boy ignored her and actually chose to speed up, weaving through the cars and buses. Eventually the pair made it to the hospital, the boy parking his motorbike outside the dilapidated muggle department store, which St Mungos was hidden inside. He ran around the bike, offering his hand to the pained Lily. The pregnant woman heaved herself out of the sidecar, dropping her bag into Sirius’ open hand.
“Thank you very much, call James will you.” She smiled before hobbling into the run down store/hospital. The boy stood there looking completely baffled, clutching her bag tightly in his hand.
“Right James. Yes. Of course.” He stammered, charming his bike with a locking spell before following his friend into the building. He hated St Mungos. Of course they worked their arses off and performed actual miracles sometimes but it reminded him too much of many traumatic events within his life. Like that one time his father had beaten him to the limit leaving the boy unconscious, and surprisingly his parents had deposited him in the hospital, covered in blood and bruises. He remembered the nurses asking how he had gotten so many injuries including a broken leg and several broken ribs. He remembered the piercing look on his father’s face and the sudden relief when Sirius lied, promising the nurses it was just hi being clumsy and falling down the stairs or out of a tree or fiddling with his mother’s wand.
Or the other time when Remus had possibly the worst full moon ever, during 6th year. Where the boy woke up completely ripped to shreds and his own blood puddled around him. He remembered Madame Pomfrey’s face when she found the boy he cared so greatly for. Unfortunately, Remus was bought to St Mungos for urgent, emergency care meaning the other marauders weren’t able to see their final member for weeks. He remembered walking in and seeing Remus curled up on one of the horrific hospital beds, tear stained eyes and scars and bandages covering every inch of his body. He remembered his heart breaking at the sight of his close friend.
Sprinting into the hospital, Sirius was met with extreme hustle and bustle. He spotted Lily leaning against a reception desk, her arms crossed tightly as she explained her situation to the rather dim nurse. He saw the staff nod rapidly, absorbing the girl’s information, a wheelchair summoned immediately. He held up his mirror in front of his face, his reflection resembling panic. “Come on James, Lily needs you!” A messy haired boy’s face met his, sweat and blood dripping down his panicked face. ‘What?’ The boy mouthed to Sirius, his eyebrows knitted together. Sirius just nodded, showing his best friend the hospital surrounding him. Immediately the boy disappeared, the mirror showing the darkness of his pocket.
“Mr Black, we are taking Mrs Potter through to the theatre. You may join until the father arrives.” A nurse ushered the black haired boy through a set of doors down an eerie hospital corridor. “Right this way sir, do you know if Mr Potter is on his way?” She asked gently, pushing a door open to reveal Lily lying on a bed already dressed in a hospital gown.
Sirius nodded, his throat dry. “Y-yeah, hopefully…” He glanced at Lily who looked slightly pissed and slightly worried. He smirked at her and nodded, the girl immediately understanding that her husband was okay.
“Wonderful, well she’s already 8cm dilated so we’ll begin soon if that’s alright?”
“Wait! We can’t start without James!” Lily cried as Sirius joined her side, wrapping his arm around her shoulder.
“Well, let’s hope he turns up in time shall we.” The nurse snapped, leaving the room quickly, her robes floating behind her.
“It’ll be fine Lils; he’ll be here in time, don’t you worry!” He smiled as he heard a door slam down the corridor. “Speak of the devil, I bet that’s him.”
Lily groaned slightly as she saw Remus sprint in, Peter on his tail. “Gah, we- we made it!” He breathed heavily, panting as he attempted the regain his breath.
“Told you, we should have apparated!” Peter squeaked, his breath also heavy. “But noooooo, Remus insisted on Floo!” Peter groaned, throwing his body into a stool in the corner of the room.
“Well I’m sorry I didn’t fancy getting splinched today, Floo was the safer option.” Remus glared at the chubby boy, making his way over to his currently pained friend. “You good Lily? Keep breathing, nice and slowly.” He made breathing actions with his hands before placing a quick kiss on Sirius’ cheek.
“No, I thought I’d just hold my breath until the fucking baby pops out.” Lily snaps, her hair sticking to her forehead. Remus flinched slightly, stepping behind Sirius.
“Nu uh, don’t use me as a barrier to the beast. I might love you but I don’t want to die before I see my little niece.” ((Keep reading, I’m not being dumb.)) Sirius gently pushed Remus away from behind him, a smirk plastered on his face.
“You love me? Awh, I love you too.” Remus smiled gently, as Lily cried out in pain. “Oh shut it, we’re having a moment here.” Remus grinned, stepping back quickly to miss Lily’s punch.
“Shut it!? I wanna see you try this, this is the most painful thing-” she stopped to grimace before continuing. “-Ever!”
“Trying being a werewolf, honey.” Remus joked before joining Peter in the corner of the room.
Before Lily could retort, the doors swung open again. “I swear to god if this isn’t him, I’m going to lose it!” Lily cried, her eyes wide. Much to the other boy’s dismay as well as her own, Marlene McKinnon, Dorcas Meadowes and her own mother sprinted into the room, her mother clutching a teddy bear. “Oh for fuck’s sake! I want James right now!” She slammed her head back against the headboard, closing her eyes tightly.
“Wow, nice to see you too.” Marlene sighed, plonking on the edge of Lily’s bed as Dorcas joined the boys at the edge of the room.
“Oh Lily dear, have they not given you any painkillers or epidural?” Eleanor Evans made her way to her daughter’s side quickly, throwing the teddy towards Sirius who caught it quickly and began to hand it back to her before forgetting he wasn’t actually a dog and now definitely wasn’t the time for fetch.
“Oh mum, the magic world doesn’t seem to have heard of the wonders of medicine and painkillers.” Lily smiled, her voice full of sarcasm as another contraction hit. The nurse entered the room again, pulling on a pair of gloves.
“Got enough people in here have we?” she snarled, glaring at the crowd of people who filled the room. The nurse ducked down, the room silent as they watched. “Right then, 10 centimetres. I think it’s time to get that baby out of you.” She smirked, ringing a small bell beside her. Quickly, a midwife entered the room, an elf behind her carrying a pile of towels in his small arms.
“Hello Mrs Potter, I’m-” the midwife began to introduce herself before Lily interrupted.
“I don’t care who you are but this baby isn’t going anywhere until my husband is here, capiche?” Lily growled, gripping Sirius’ forearm tightly.
“Sorry sweetie but if we don’t start pushing, the baby’s life could be in danger.” The midwife apologised gently, pulling her stool up towards Lily.
“Erm, sorry to interject, but if you can’t wait ten minutes then all our lives could be in danger.” Sirius pointed out, releasing his arm from Lily’s grip and replacing it with his hand. “Ten minutes, I promise he’ll be here.”
“I’m really sorry sir but we simply must-” Before the midwife could continue, a sweaty and bloodied boy entered the room, his glasses broken and his hair full of soot.
“I’m here, I’m here!” He cried, plunging his hand into his back pocket before sprinting to Lily’s side. “Nothing’s happened, has it?” He questioned, eyeing past Lily’s knees to double check no baby was there.
“Not yet, but we really must begin. I’m assuming you’re the father?” The nurse questioned, her eyebrows raised towards James.
“The one and only.” He smirked, grabbing Lily’s spare hand and placing a gentle kiss on her forehead.
“Right then, family only in here. Everyone else must leave!” The nurse swung around to face the crowd, who seemed to make no attempt to move. “Any time soon?” She growled, her patience wearing thin.
All of the group shared looks among themselves, no one budging. “They’re all family…” James’ voice echoed over Lily’s growls.
“Well, all out! A maximum of three only in here.” The nurse spat, pushing Sirius slightly off the bed.
“No, I want him to stay!” Lily clutched Sirius’ hand tightly, ushering him back to her side. Eleanor joined James, her hand brushing hair off Lily’s sticky forehead. “Well, he is going to be the godfather.” Lily looked up at the boy, who’s face was the definition of shock.
“Godfather?” He stuttered, his mouth hung wide open. James and Lily shared a look before the girl winced slightly. A smirk begun to cover his face. “Don’t you mean-”
“I insist you all leave this second.”
“Sirius, don’t you dare.”
“Can we go to the vending machine?”
“Dogfather.”
Sighs erupted throughout the room as the majority of the room poured out of the room. Remus leant down, placing a gentle kiss on Lily’s head while patting her husband’s back. Before leaving, his eyes met Sirius’, full of disappointment and pride of his outrageous pun.
“Well, shall we begin my dear?” The midwife, adjusted Lily’s position, a surgical mask pulled over her mouth. The girl’s mother gripped one hand, James the other, giving her a level of reassurance.
“Right then sweetie, when I say so, you need to push. If it hurts, just say and well charm you.” The midwife began, ushering the girl to push slowly. Sirius hovered behind her, his face full of emotions. “Push Lily, go on girl.”
“Come on baby, you can do this.” James soothed her, ignoring her grunts of pain. “What does it look like Pads? Can you see him?” He winced, his hand almost exploding from the girl’s squeeze.
“Well…” Sirius began, peering over the midwife’s shoulder. “I’d say it’s beautiful and it’s the wonderful miracle of life but that’d be lying. It’s bloody disgusting, it looks like the alien popping out of John Hurt, and the baby is absolutely horrific.” He covers his mouth in slight disgust. “How are you doing this Lily man? Like what the shit?”
“Really not BLOODY helping Black, so I’d shut up!” She groans in response as she pushes again, gripping her family’s hands tighter.
“Oh yeah right, sorry. Go on Lils, you can do this! Show em how it’s done! Go on girl!”
“This isn’t Quidditch Sirius.” James says sternly, his eyes full of laughter but his face serious.
Remus sits in the waiting room, his friends surrounding him. His knee bounces from nerves as Peter devours a packet of crisps beside him. “What’d you think they’ll call him?” He asks, spitting crumbs everywhere. “Or her, of course.”
“I don’t know Pete.”
“I think James is set on Elvendork still, but I’m pretty sure Lily won’t agree.”
“Nope, she won’t.”
“What would you call your child? Something Wolfy to go with the family?”
“No.”
“You’re not very talkative today are you?” The smaller boy launched the empty packet towards the bin, missing by a mile.
“I’m fine.” Remus responded, staring at the packet on the floor with a blank face. In actual fact, he wasn’t. Lily was his best friend, if anything were to happen he’d be completely lost. He couldn’t lose her, he was just hoping everything was fine. “I’m just…” He shook his head, reaching for the chocolate in his pocket.
Breaking off a bit, his eyes met James’ through the door. They were full of panic. His heart dropped, standing up quickly as the boy pushed the door open. “Well?” He felt Peter join him, Marlene and Dorcas’ presence behind them.
“We have a baby boy.” James beamed, his eyes tearing up a bit. His forehead glistened with sweat, his eyes red and his hand wrapped in a bandage. “We have a boy, me and Lily.” Dorcas was the first one to move, pushing through the doors in which James came from, Marlene following her towards the sound of a baby crying.
“You’re officially an adult now Prongs!” Peter smirked, patting his taller friend on the shoulder, before following the others, the door swinging shut behind him.
“I’m pretty proud of you Prongs.” Remus began before being engulfed in the other boy’s arms.
“Oh shut up you, don’t get all soppy.” James laughed pulling away. “Now come on and come meet your nephew.” The boy grabbed his scarred hand, tugging him slightly.
“My nephew?” Remus questioned, confusion plastering his face. James nodded, pulling him towards the room.
They entered to see Lily lying on the bed, her red hair falling out of its up-do, the group surrounding her. Her face looked tired, a faint smile still on her lips. A slight giggle could be heard and the whole group sighed in awe.
“Remy, come meet baby Harry.” Lily ushered him over, her pale hand reaching out. Remus crossed the room towards the bed, the group silent as the watched the interaction. Lily’s mother passed a bundle of blankets over to Remus. He had Lily’s eyes: big, bright and green. A small smile covered his tiny face, his eyes squeezed shut.
“He looks just like you, Lils.” He smiled, holding the baby close.
“Eh, I’ll take that as a compliment, even if Sirius did compare him to an alien…” Lily sighed, her hand grabbing James’. Remus looked up, his eyes meeting Sirius’, his smile widening.
“Of course he did…” Remus grinned, passing the baby over to Marlene. Stepping over to the bed, Remus felt a hand snake around his waist, Sirius pulling him nearer.
“So is Elvendork the name?” Peter beamed, cooing at the baby over Marlene’s shoulder. “Or has Lily veto-”
The room was full of Lily’s sarcastic laughter. “Oh Pete, you do make me laugh! That’s a definite veto.”
“I think it should be Sirius Jr personally.”
“No something very traditional, like Prospero.”
“Or Albus? Or is that weird?”
“What about something more normal, like Charlie?”
The room was full of suggestions from all parties, some slightly ridiculous than others.
“Oi, shut it you lot…” James growled, holding the baby tightly against his body, which was perched on the edge of Lily’s bed. “Everyone,” he began looking down at his wife. “We would like to introduce you to Harry. Harry Potter.”