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He came with one of the hottest days in the county. Esther was day drinking under the guise of sunbathing with Sharky and Hurk when a new voice floated over the airwaves. All of them.
"Esther, it's Steven. We need to talk."
She immediately bristled and voiced her outrage with a squawk. Esther lunged for the radio before anyone else could get a word in edgewise.
"Steven, what the fresh fuck are you doing here?!"
She could practically hear him sigh on the other end.
"It's taken some time, but I need you. I tried to get over you, but you're it for me and whatever happened－whatever happens, I forgive you. Can we meet somewhere? So we can talk?"
Esther could practically feel her blood pressure rise.
"Absolutely not. What you're gonna do is turn right back around and march your ass back home. I have nothing more to say to you."
"Fine. Then we can do this now."
"We ain't doing shit! We agreed not to have any contact afterward and I'm holding you to that. Leave me alone!"
"You're not getting rid of me that easy, Es. Not like last time. And I'm not ready to let you go. I love you."
She snarled in disgust into the receiver. Jacob was rubbing off on her.
"Listen here, fucker. If you don't get out of Montana bad shit will happen and I might not be able to stop it. You need to leave, like yesterday."
"Not unless you come with me."
She would have torn her hair out at that point but stomped her foot in a very John-like fashion instead. She'd visit that thought later.
"A past lover, Esther? How... cute."
Speak of the devil.
Esther dropped her head into her hands. This wasn't happening.
Sharky touched her shoulder and she leaned into it.
"I should let him get got. I really, really should."
She heard him cluck his tongue, "Might not be worth the trouble, amigo."
Hurk hummed in consideration. "Dunno, might be fun to watch?"
Esther snorted and moved to climb down from the roof.
"His family would have a fucking fit."
"Esther. I need to see you."
God, could he give it a rest already?
"Eat shit and hair, Steven."
She clipped the radio to her belt and climbed down the ladder.
"I've already eaten your ass, so that's not too far off."
Esther slipped down the rest of the rungs and fell flat on said ass.
Sharky and Hurk howled with laughter from their perches and Esther flopped to the ground and covered her face. The whole county was listening on the very open airwaves, no doubt the Seeds as well. She'd have to kill Steven herself. With her bare hands.
"Spread Eagle in Fall's End in an hour."
"See you."
"Kick rocks."
After significant teasing, Esther hopped in her truck and sped off down the road. An old rage unfurled from her chest and she grit her teeth. It'd had years to cultivate into something cold and heavy. Being subjected to the will of a narcissist did a number on her general tolerance for people.
She pulled up to the Eagle forty minutes or so later and was up the steps in two bounds, bursting through the door.
Steven was sat at the bar with his back to her. He hadn't changed in the six or so years since she'd seen him. At least from behind.
Esther and Mary May shared a look over his shoulder as the woman poured her a shot of something she hoped was strong.
She stomped up to the bar and Steven turned to face her with a grim look about his face.
He looked her over, unblinking.
"You look good, lost weight but good."
Esther gave him a dry look.
"Let's get this over with," She slammed the shot back and plead with her eyes for more. Mary May obliged her.
"Speak. You have three minutes."
Steven looked to his hands rolling the beer bottle between them.
"I miss you. Despite the shit you put me through, I still missed you."
She gripped the edge of the bar to keep herself from accosting him. It took everything in her not to hurl the shot glass straight through his face and then some.
"What I put you through?! What about the shit you put me through?"
He tried to catch her eye but she was far too busy glaring at a bottle of vodka that was sure to put her on her ass in under twenty minutes.
"I would've done anything for you, Esther. Absolutely anything, but you gave me nothing."
She barked a laugh, "Anything? That's fucking rich coming from you. You couldn't even wash your ass."
Esther looked at her wrist in a show of "times up".
"Oh, would you look at the time, we're done here."
He caught her arm before she could get too far.
"No, we're not."
Esther, within seconds, considered punching him straight in his crooked face and dropping him. Maybe even hand him over to Whitehorse or John at this point, she was so done.
In the time it took her to weigh her options, rough hands wrenched them apart. Esther looked up to see Jacob in all his redheaded glory with impatience etched into the weary lines of his face.
"She said you're done."
Esther beamed a smile at him that quickly turned to horror.
"What're you doing here? You could get in so much shit for this." She hissed, pulling him over to the side.
Jacob shrugged and thumbed back to the rest of the bar.
"Fairgrave cleared it out."
Esther visibly deflated and pushed into his space, resting her head over his heart. She definitely owed Mary May the fucking world for saving her ass when it came to Jacob. Maybe a nice fruit basket.
One of Jacob's large hands was at the small of her back, pulling her in closer while the other snaked down to her ass to give her a squeeze.
She pinched his side in retaliation.
"I'm still here."
Esther muffled a groan in Jacob's chest. He didn't even care enough to turn when speaking to Steven.
"Not if you want to keep breathin’."
Steven ambled to his feet with an air of defiance about him; the unmistakable clinking of dog tags on his breastbone. Jacob looked down at the woman in his arms with a sardonic smile.
"You got a thing for military types you wanna tell me about, sweetheart?"
She pressed her forehead harder into his chest with a muffled, "Nothing I can think of".
Jacob led her back to the bar, popped a squat one stool over and pulled Esther to firmly seat her in his lap. Mary May looked on in silence, the gleam in her eye held a hint of petty satisfaction.
Barkeeps were notorious gossips and Mary May was just as nosey as the rest of them. What did surprise Esther, however, was how much of a Chatty Cathy Pastor Jerome was. She'd most definitely be spilling this brand of scalding tea to him later.
Jacob hooked his chin over Esther's shoulder to give Steven a lazy grin full of teeth. None of them missed the grip the elder Seed had on her upper thigh.
Steven gave Esther a blank look that somehow conveyed his displeasure.
"You never let me touch you."
Esther shrugged with the Jacob-less shoulder.
"He might have blood on his hands every now and again, but at least he washes them."
The next glass she took a sip from was water. Esther shot a grateful look to Mary May. She practically owed the woman her firstborn.
"You need to let that go,"
"Fuck you."
"Or we'll never be able to move forward." He kept on.
Esther sucked her teeth and leaned forward, one arm resting on the bar for balance.
"Listen here, I've moved forward. I been moved forward, you cuck."
A hitch in Jacob's breath gave way to a chuckle that he smothered into her neck.
"Just because you can't get your head out of your ass long enough to see yourself as the problem doesn't mean I'm obligated to coddle you and love you through your bullshit."
She caught the subtle twitch of his left hand, one of his few tells that let her know he was getting angry. If he wasn't already at least.
"My bullshit? You're the broken one. I tried to love you and help you heal and you wouldn't let me. You ordered me like one of your dogs and cast me aside with no explanation when you didn't want me anymore."
Despite his level voice, he was still as emotional as ever, she mused. Rightfully so, but there was no way she'd tell him that because fuck him that's why. And not to say that being emotional was a bad thing or that men shouldn't be, quite the contrary in fact. It was this man in particular that had the uncanny ability to grate on her very last nerve.
She took half a moment to right herself and breathe.
"I had a traumatic upbringing, I'm working on it. But no amount of love is going to fix me. I have to fix myself and I'm doing a decent job, no thanks to you. What’d you want me to say? That I cheated on you? That I found someone else? I didn't, at that time at least."
She threaded her fingers through Jacob's.
All throughout their relationship did he accuse her of cheating. Assigning the same faults his previous relationships fell prey to.
"I don't want you and I don't love you. That's all the closure you're gonna get. You're fucking crazy for tracking me down all the way out here."
“I loved you more than it should’ve been possible－more than you deserved and even to this day you still give me nothing.”
She snorted into the rim of her glass, “Sounds like a personal problem to me, now get while the offer still stands.”
His face pinched in his confusion. There was a time where she found him attractive, not crazily but the way he carried himself and the way he spoke. Now? Now he was downright repulsive and she’d take her psychotic mountain man over him any day of the week. Hell, she’d take any of the Seeds over him.
“The offer of letting you go back to wherever the fuck you came from without getting shot.”
Jacob set his teeth to her neck, his reply ghosting over her skin. She’d imagine that he maintained eye contact while he bit at her. She’d have to reward him later.
“Look,” Esther caught his attention. “I actually like your Nonna so it'd be best if you went back home to her in one piece because you’re more likely to get there in a trash bag if you don’t. This is no place for you. With me or otherwise.”
Steven turned to Jacob, dismissing her with the blatant turn of his body and shift in attention.
"Does she speak to you like this? She's always liked to boss people around, just like her mother."
Jacob felt her stiffen, poised to unleash Hell like he knew she would. He'd pay money to see it, even. He, instead, grounded her with his hand moving to her stomach to press her back into his chest.
He took his sweet time, unhurried in his reply, as he rubbed his thumb into her waist.
"Look, Bret－"
"Steven."
"That's what I said." Jacob rolled his eyes. "Whatever your name is, Esther speaks to me just fine. Maybe she would'nt've spoken to you like a dog if you didn't act like such a bitch."
There was a brief pause as Mary May slipped on something invisible behind the bar, hiding her laughter with a cough.
A few things happened at once: as Steven rushed forward to knock the living daylight out of either of them, Esther landed a solid kick to his sternum, sending him ass over teakettle. If Jacob hadn't quite literally had her back, she would've sent herself and the stool skittering back.
While they watched Steven recover and get back on his feet, Mary May angled her shotgun right at Esther's bootprint on his shirt.
"Out."
Steven glanced at her and the gun before looking back at the pair. Jacob had already unholstered Esther's sidearm and placed in on the bar next to her elbow, finger resting lightly next to the trigger.
"You heard the lady."
Steven turned to storm out as Esther called out after him, "Don't worry about the beer! It's on the house!"
"You owe me $3."
"Fuck. You got cash on you J?"
The door slammed so hard it shook the frames hung up on the wall.