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Tony wakes up surrounded by warmth. It's everywhere around him, but he doesn’t mind, even when he tries to sit up and finds that he can’t move. He isn’t that worried about it: he knows he's still too tired from being out watching over Barton and Thor last night to make sure they didn’t get into trouble, so he’s perfectly content with staying wrapped up in this warmth for as long as he can. That is, until he hears a groan and a voice somewhere beyond the warmth whispering “stay with me” in one of the sexiest sleepy morning voices tony has ever heard.
Tony jerks his body forward hard enough that he tumbles off the bed, and slowly peeks over the edge to check if he can see where the voice came from. And what he finds is Thor’s best friend, James Buchanan Barnes, laying in the middle of the bed – right where Tony assumes he was, judging by the way Barnes’ hands lay on the sheets.
After Tony stands up from the floor, he goes into the bathroom to wash his face. As he begins to rub some water over his eyes, he feels the coolness of metal on his hand.
His first instinct, of course, is to assume that his nano-tech was activated by his heart rate skyrocketing when Barnes unknowingly startled him out of the bed, but when he opens his eyes and takes a second to study his hand, all he sees is a silver band on his left ring finger. He simply stares at it for a few moments that seems like hours. He was in shock and completely speechless, but instead of trying to remember how he got into the situation of even getting married last night, he does the best thing that comes to mind – which is to storm back into the area where the bed is located and starts throwing anything he can grab at the still-sleeping man.
At this moment in time, Tony does not care that he is half dressed as he continues to pelt Barnes with objects from all around the room. He just wants Barnes to get up so he can yell. After a couple of minutes, Tony is beginning to feel a little bit of stress leave his body as he keeps throwing stuff at Barnes. Because Tony is so focused on that, he doesn’t notice Barnes beginning to sit up and ogle his ‘husband’s’ half-dressed state.
Tony didn’t think about the fact that his state of undressed may imply the man still in bed will be half dressed too but once Barnes sits up Tony remembers. He remembers that Barnes is extremely attractive with his clothes on , but now that most, if not all, of those clothes are on the floor , Tony thinks, “holy shit, this can’t be real.”
“Y’know,” Tony freezes in place as Barnes’ Brooklyn accent cuts through his thoughts, “I thought waking up the morning after gettin’ married, we’re supposed t’spend the next couple days throwin’ our bodies at each other, not throwin’ objects, baby doll.” Tony just watches Barnes with an unamused look on his face and continues to throw things until he runs out of things to hit Barnes with – that’s when he finally decides to speak.
“Why, and I want a serious answer here Barnes, is there a ring on my finger?” Tony questions through clenched teeth. He doesn’t know what he’s expecting Barnes to say or not say, but when he replies – very seriously, Tony notes – with a deadly calm, “Oh, that’s because we got married last night,” Tony wants to bang his head onto his very sturdy desk back in his lab.
Letting out a deep sigh, Tony pinches the bridge of his nose. “Barnes, be serious for one goddamn minute! How the hell did we end up in this room, and married? Neither of us were drunk last night! Hell, I only had two drinks!” Tony notices that Barnes gets exceptionally silent and tries to leave the bed area quickly. Just before Barnes gets around the bed, Tony steps into his space and plants his feet right in front of him. “Ah, ah, ah,” Tony tuts, “you don’t get to walk away from this conversation. Sit your ass down and explain what exactly happened last night.”
“I’m just as clueless as you are, sweetheart. I’m definitely glad that it was you I got married to, Tony, but I honestly don’t know how we ended up here. Don’t worry though.” A shaky intake of breath and Bucky slowly continues, “You won’t have to stay married to me for long. One mention of you marrying the Winter Soldier and everyone will create an opportunity for you to have an out.” Trying to catch Bucky’s eye, Tony feels a jolt of pain. It’s a sharp enough that it makes his eyes misty.
“Barnes, that’s not- you are not the problem. I’m glad it was you that drunk me got married to, too. But sober me doesn’t want that, I don’t want you-”
Just before Tony can finish that sentence, Clint bursts through the door smiling like the cat who got the cream with a confused-looking Thor trudging along behind him. Tony keeps his eyes on Bucky for a minute longer, and sees a sad but understanding smile cover his lips. Clint plops himself down on a chair that is as far away from Tony as possible, while Thor grumbles about there not being any breakfast like Clint promised and takes to laying down on the bed behind Bucky.
Just as Bucky takes a deep breath and releases it is when Tony hears Clint begins to chuckle. “How’s married life treating you Tony?”
Tony sighs, “I’m sure it’s going as fantastic as you expect, Clint. I went out with you last night to make sure you didn’t cause any trouble and yet I ended up married to him somehow.” Noticing Clint nod along - almost mockingly - as Tony was talking makes Tony suspect this was Clint’s plan. “Don’t act like you’re that upset about it, Tony. I’ve seen things and know what’s really going on with you,” Clint divulged.
Just as an angry frown appears on Tony’s face he sees Clint grin devilishly. But before a full-out argument can start, Bucky clears his throat. “Clint, want to explain how this all happened? ‘Cause last I remember, I was showing Thor the different types of music, and then it all gets blurry.” Tony turns to face Bucky to silently thank him for keeping the conversation where Tony needs it, but a light ringing starts up in his ears and he feels his angry frown lose some of its heat as his whiskey brown eyes meet Barnes’ ice blue ones. When Tony pulls himself from the depths of those dangerously beautiful baby blues, he hears Barnes’ voice still reverberating around the room. “I know I didn’t drink more than one of Thor’s special drinks, Barton. And I know that because I was planning on training with Steve and Sam today. So, explain.”
Tony’s frown begins to turn more into a glare the longer Clint says nothing. But somewhere inside him, he knows that’s exactly what Clint wants. Clint loves when Tony’s emotions become too much and he explodes, so Tony takes a few deep breaths to center himself and calmly demands, “Explain.”
Tony watches Clint’s body slightly deflate at that one word as Clint sits up to begin the retelling of the night.
~~~~~~~
It was a normal night out with Clint, Thor, Tony and Bucky. Clint was planning some type of payback plan for Tony because he benched Clint for five months, but neither Thor nor Bucky knew what it was. All they knew was it was something that could possibly make Tony hold a grudge for a bit or possibly get his own payback once this was done.
When Bucky takes Thor to the jukebox across the room and Tony goes to the bathroom, Clint jumps at the opportunity just given to him. He swaps the drinks between the three men. He gives Tony Bucky’s drink, which is stronger than anything Tony is used too; Bucky now has Thor’s drink and Thor ultimately gets Tony’s drink. Clint doesn’t think any of them will really tell the difference or care enough to tell the bartender it tasted different, so he doesn’t worry about it.
It doesn’t take long for the effects to hit both Tony and Bucky, and even Thor is slightly drunker than usual since he chugged the rest of his Asgardian mead because, in his own words, “This stuff isn’t as strong as it used to be!” Clint gleefully watched as Tony and Bucky had let their fears go little by little and started enjoying the feelings of the other being as close as possible and seeming just as happy to be there with them. He lets them drunkenly talk and hold on to each other for a couple hours before he notices their eyes get droopy.
With the main two participants happily out of commission and third one who is happily ready to help, Clint is giddy that his plan is slowly coming to fruition.
He has Thor carrying Tony on his shoulder while he pulls the drunk super soldier along behind him with promises of good old-fashioned hotdogs from Brooklyn. As they get closer to the building Clint slows down a bit as he replays the plan in his mind to make sure he has everything set up and ready to go when they arrive.
He knows at the end of this he’ll probably end up running for his life for a week or two, but he’s happy it’ll be because his two friends will finally get together and stop all the mutual pining shit. Clint can only take so much of the longing looks, or the separate talks of “not being good enough” and “he can do so much better”, or even the passive-aggressiveness when jealousy rears its ugly head. He’s been dealing with Bucky and Tony pining from afar for over a year and now that Steve and Sam seemed to have started the whole pining thing, he decided it was time to play cupid for one couple and get shit done.
Finally making it to the building, he leads the other three men inside and gives Tony and Bucky a small slap on the cheek to wake them up a little. He whispers into Bucky’s ear, “It’s time for your wedding, bud. Remember? You and Tony are finally getting hitched, you just gotta walk down the aisle and say, “I do” and he’ll be yours forever!”
Knowing that with this version of Bucky it’s the only time where he can be easily persuaded into doing something - especially if it’s something that involves Tony - Clint waits for Bucky to process what he’s already said. Not even a minute later Clint watches how Bucky is basically vibrating at the thought of actually being able to marry Tony and then suddenly he sees Bucky’s perk up and look around before finding Tony and pulling him along to the altar.
Since both men are already dressed up, Clint pins a flower to each of their jackets, fixes their hair back how they like it and pulls a silver and a gold ring out of his pocket. He and Thor stand on either side of the couple and listen to the officiant go on with the whole shebang of the prewritten, boring vows. Clint rolls his eyes, and he can hear Thor’s “Aww,” when the officiant pauses after each set of vows to let Bucky and Tony say something of their own.
(Tony says, “Your eyes are so blue they’re almost like my heart,” and Bucky says, “You’re pretty cute, babydoll.”)
Carefully, the rings are exchanged. Tony tries placing the gold one on Bucky’s metal finger, but it’s hard to do,so he places it on Bucky’s right hand with the promise to find a way to get a ring on his metal hand one day, and Bucky easily slips the silver ring on Tony’s finger. Then a few minutes later, Thor is cheering, Clint’s clapping away and the new Mr. and Mr. Stark-Barnes are giggling and clinging to each other happily – Clint knows this will all work out. And maybe, just maybe, he won’t have to run for his life at all.
~~~~~~~
“So,” Tony sighs deeply, “let me get this straight. You switched all of our drinks to get me and Barnes drunk beyond belief, and to be able to drag us to what? A 24-hour wedding chapel?” He watches Clint nod sheepishly and shift in his chair, planting his feet solidly on the ground. Before anything else can be said, Tony sees Thor sit up and grumble, “Stark, your vows were beautiful. Barnes, you need to work on yours. Which is good, because that means you still have time.” And as fast as he sat up, Thor is back down on the bed going back to sleep.
“What does he mean I still have time, Clint?” Bucky grounds out like he’s putting together this puzzle Clint has given them, but Tony doesn’t have all the pieces yet. When Barton says nothing, Tony looks at Bucky when he growls, “Barton. What. does. he. mean?”
And just like that, the truth comes tumbling out from Clint’s lips as he begins to pace nervously.
He tells them he’s watched them pine for each other for over a year and nothing was progressing, but it was starting to destroy them internally. Their want, their need for the other was strong and full of love – but not thinking they were good enough, or fearing they could never be wanted by the other, was eating away at their souls. Clint has seen friends, partners, and coworkers lose themselves for things like these, and he knew that if Bucky and Tony lost themselves because of their fear of being rejected, it would slowly eat away at their bonds with everyone else. And he couldn’t watch that happen.
He figured he'd set up a small warehouse to look like the small wedding chapels in Las Vegas, hire someone to act as the officiant – so no real marriage happened – and buy two rings he thought they’d like, in an attempt to make it seem legit enough that the Iron Man and the Winter Soldier wouldn’t question it.
Tony watches as Clint stops pacing to face both him and Bucky. “I thought this would be the kick in the ass you guys needed but here we are and I’m sorry.” Flopping back down into his chair, Clint lets out a resigned sigh. “If you’re going to kill me, do it here and now. I’m too tired to run because I had to take apart the fake wedding chapel after we got you back here and checked in.”
“Go,” Tony mumbles softly, and he can see Bucky’s shoulders drop as he shakes his head. “Take Thor and get some coffee and breakfast, Barton. It looks like Barnes and I have some things to talk about.” Tony nods his head towards the door with a small smile when Clint looks at him with sad, confused puppy dog eyes. “You aren’t wrong, cupid. I mean, you’re an idiot for doing this whole thing rather than just telling us to go kiss each other before we gave up. But you’re an idiot most days, so get out of here and let us figure this out.”
As both men watch Clint pull a still sleepy Thor from the bed and speed walk from the room, Bucky lets out a laugh of disbelief and Tony can’t help but feel the butterflies erupt in his stomach at the sound.
“You’ve been pinin’ for me, huh babydoll?” Bucky drawls, his Brooklyn accent breaking through. “That’s surprisin’, considering not even ten minutes ago you were saying you didn’t want me.” A sad smile crosses his face and Tony knows it doesn’t belong there at all. He knows that Bucky deserves to finally be happy after all the bad he’s gone through in his life. Tony knows he wants to be the person to rid Bucky’s of the sadness and bad memories he has and tried not to show. Tony wants to replace them with new memories they create together and all the feelings that come with each one.
“Barnes, that’s not what I meant,” Tony tries to explain. “I do, I do want you. I just didn’t want it to be a drunken night where we didn’t remember what happened. I’ve had too many of those, and I never want that when it comes to you.”
Shifting on the bed, Bucky nods slowly, “Really? You want me, Stark? I mean I definitely want you, there’s no doubt about it. I wasn’t bein’ sneaky about my feelings, or at least I never thought I was.” Tony smiles at Bucky’s slight pause, like he’s playing back different times in the year of pining. “I guess you jus’ made me nervous, sweetheart. What’s your excuse, Stark?” Bucky gives a sinful smile and Tony is very glad he’s sitting down because that smile would have knocked him on his ass.
“No excuse Barnes. I wasn’t as happy to admit them to you or anyone because I knew you could do better. I knew that, James. There isn’t one thing that made me feel like that or anything about you that I thought was too much for me. I just know that I’m no good. Everyone I’m close to either dies or nearly does, and I can’t put you through any of that. Especially after everything HYDRA did to you. I hate that you still insist to go out on missions to try to take down the rest of HYDRA because I’m always terrified that one time you won’t come back one day and that’ll be on me. I just, I’m- “
“You done yet?” Bucky interrupts the continuous rambling.
Tony startles when he sees Bucky is now standing right in front of him with an outstretched hand. He doesn’t take it at first, but when Bucky wiggles his fingers and gives him an understanding smile, Tony places his hand in Bucky’s. Leading them to the window that overlooks New York, their fingers intertwine easily like they’ve done this a million times before. They stay like that, watching the raindrops hit the window and the people moving about on the sidewalks for what feels like hours before Bucky speaks.
“Babydoll, I’m a big boy. I can take care of myself, but I feel all those same things about you. The fear of losing you in any way is always goin’ to be there, but I know damn well, if someone ever does lay a hand on you and you don’t rip it off yourself, I will find them and do it for you. So, what do you say, sweetheart? You willin’ to push the fear away knowing that if something does happen, we will find our way back to each other? You willin’ to take a chance on this one-hundred-year-old man?” Tony lets out a laugh at Bucky’s crooked smile.
Bucky waits for an answer patiently, as Tony watches him stand there watching the city life while unconsciously rubbing different patterns into the back of Tony’s hand. And when he finally speaks his answer aloud, Tony melts into Bucky’s arms the second they are around him and he knows he’s never been happier than in this moment,
“Yeah, James. I think I’m willing to take that chance. Especially if it’s on that one-hundred-year-old man.”