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There were a few things Sakura wanted in her life.
To be a good ninja. To be a good daughter. To be a good friend. And, despite everything, to be a good soulmate.
It was more fact than legend, the soulmark that marked them. She had always been curious about what kind of a person she was meant for. She got her answer at age four when a blurry outline of her soulmark started developing on the side of her neck. It appeared like fire, not hurting her but refusing to be ignored. It came with whispers laced with possessive intent, like they would take over her entire being. It took two years for it to develop, but when its lines were finally dark and thick, she hadn’t expected her parents’ apprehension.
She had no idea what it could be. It looked like a pinwheel, the straight tomoe nearly hypnotic in its design. The circle stood out clearly on the side of her neck as she admired it in the mirror. It looked like a really pretty tattoo.
“It reminds me of the Sharingan,” her mother whispered. She was unable to hide the look of worry, although she tried to smile when her daughter eyed her. She really was too sharp for her own good.
“What’s that?” Sakura asked curiously.
“It’s a dojutsu. The- the um, Uchiha dojutsu,” Kizashi told her hesitantly, not sure if he should tell her. Sakura gaped at her father.
“So Sasuke-kun’s my..my…” She couldn’t bring herself to complete her sentence. It brought mixed feelings, and her mark seemed to almost burn in response.
Mebuki couldn’t help but laugh at her words. “You do know there are more Uchihas present in Konoha, right? Your classmate isn’t the only one.” Her mother ran a hand through her hair, smiling fondly.
“But Sasuke-kun’s the only one my age!” she exclaimed. Her parents hummed in response and exchanged a look she didn’t entirely understand. Her father kneeled before the couch, rubbing his soulmark with a hint of reverence. It was bright green and stood out clearly, an unspoken declaration to the world.
“We don’t even know if its a Sharingan. You go back to the academy next week. Let’s wait and see what happens, hmm?” her father told her gently, waving the soulmark patch at her. A little square that could be infused with chakra, making it very difficult for anyone other than her to take it off. It was developed specifically to cover up soulmarks, and hers was a little too obvious to leave exposed.
She went back to the academy with her heart racing, her palms sweating, and her eyes flitting between her classmates, looking for the quiet but arrogant boy who seemed to have won so many hearts. She spotted him by the window, looking like he didn’t have a care in the world. Sakura marched towards him, fixing a polite smile in place. She felt sick with anticipation.
“Good morning,” she greeted him, waiting. He nodded in response, his face a picture of innocent confusion as she visibly tried not to wilt. She could feel Ino’s eyes burning a hole into the side of her head as she waited for something to change.
And nothing did. Her mark remained unresponsive and dark under the patch. Not even a spot of color appeared, the way it was supposed to when you met them. No matter how determined her smile was, there was no change.
Sakura couldn’t lie to herself, she was quite disappointed. She couldn’t even respond to his questioning look as she trudged up the stairs, towards the back of the class. She plopped down next to Shikamaru, glancing at him to see what he was up to. To absolutely no one's surprise, the boy was napping peacefully. The fan on his upper arm was dark against his pale skin.
She tried not to burn with envy when Kiba and Shino stood staring at one another for minutes, hands pressed to their transforming marks, completing missing the stiff postures of two other classmates.
Sakura used to have dreams, before. She could never remember them but always woke up with the impression of having been in the forest. She could nearly smell it if she tried hard enough, it was unlike anything she had ever smelled before, the scent of a forest edged with a hint of smoke. Neither were uncommon scents but there was just something...more. At least, when she still had the dreams.
There was only one Uchiha left in Konoha, and only two left in the entire world. But that didn’t really matter to Sakura. Her mark had gone the terrifying shade of grey her grandmother’s was.
Her Uchiha soulmate was dead.
The dreams had stopped. The whispers had stopped their possessive dance in her soul. Nearly overwhelmed by the loss of someone she had never known, she tried to accept that there was no more waiting to be done. No more fantasies, or excitement at the thought of meeting the one. Her parents told her that no, her life wasn’t over and she could still meet someone who was wonderful to her but there was no hiding the guilt in their eyes. Sakura would just have to learn to live with this sense of loss, wandering in the forests of Konoha trying to catch a whiff of that scent again.
Telling Sasuke about it after they became teammates had seemed like a bad idea. She went to Kakashi for advice and her immovable sensei had looked stunned at the sight of it, resting his hand on her head for a moment, before telling her it was her decision.
“It’s a tricky business, the whole soulmark thing,” he admitted, peeling off his left glove. Sakura gaped when she saw a similar pinwheel design on his wrist. It was red and black, which did not make sense.
“Wait, I don’t understand...” she trailed off, green eyes empathetic but confused. She gave herself a mental smack for the pang of jealousy.
“Neither do I,” he told her quietly. “I thought I lost him years ago, but it never faded. I still look for him when I get the chance but he’s nowhere to be found.”
That was awful and she told him so. Soulmarks die when your soulmate dies. It was just a fact of the world. Not a machine that could experience technical difficulties. But Sakura had a hard time accepting it.
“I’m sorry, sensei.”
“Me too.”
They decided to tell Sasuke together.
The Uchiha didn’t take it very well. He simply turned green and left the training grounds, Naruto running after him to get some sense into him. They both came to the bridge together the next morning. Naruto smiled sheepishly, stammering apologies they couldn’t comprehend until he unzipped his jacket to show the blue lightning bolt on his chest. He wrestled Sasuke into showing them his mark too, the bright orange Uzumaki symbol strangely bright on the pale boy.
Kakashi and Sakura felt very uncomfortable when all of a sudden, Sasuke bowed to them.
“Sensei, I apologize for any grievances a clan member of mine may have caused you. And Sakura…” Sasuke looked deeply conflicted. “I’m sorry.”
His eyes looked lighter already.
Sasuke told her that her mark was most probably the evolved form of the Sharingan, but it didn’t look like his brother’s unless it had changed. Sakura refused to acknowledge the part of her that still had hope. It would likely remain there until news of the traitorous Uchiha’s demise reached them.
She had wondered if Uchiha Itachi was her soulmate and if he’d died after he murdered his family.
She had thought that maybe the guilt had killed him. She could understand that.
Except, he wasn’t and it hadn’t. Her heart had nearly beat out of her chest as she raced to Tanzaku town with her dark-haired teammate because apparently, his brother was alive and out to kidnap their blonde one. Her hands were already forming the seals for a substitution when they got to the narrow hallway, a chair appearing where he was a second ago. With all the bravery she could muster, she looked right into his eyes and it did absolutely nothing to change her mark. In a completely impulsive and idiotic move, she was told by her teammates, she had peeled off the patch and watched as Itachi’s eyes had widened minutely. It only confirmed things for her but she wasn’t prepared for the ache she felt.
He knew the mark. Had he killed them? Had they died wishing for the chance to have met her, just once?
Jiraiya arrived while Sasuke crouched protectively in front of Naruto. It was killing him not to charge at his brother, but her teammate had sorted out his priorities.
Before Itachi escaped, he turned to her and Sakura tried not to shudder at being on the receiving end of that attention. She failed but he didn’t move. His gaze lingered on her mark before he dragged his partner away.
“We should probably tell the Hokage,” Kakashi murmured gravely. Naruto wrapped an arm around her in comfort, but she still felt so cold. Sasuke was trying to come to terms with the fact that his brother hadn’t been satisfied with killing their family and he was now out to kidnap his soulmate too.
Itachi’s blood felt like ice in veins and he knew Kisame could send something was off. He shrugged off his concerns, watching idly as his partner shrugged off his cloak. The thick cords of muscle wrapped around long limbs sent a shiver up his spine, but his dark eyes went to the Konoha symbol on his partner’s back that never failed to amuse him and he chuckled, feeling grateful for the simple shark tooth on his own back.
Thinking back to his brother’s teammate worried him further. Because he knew who that mangekyou Sharingan belonged to and he couldn’t help but pity the girl. At the same time, he was curious to see what would become of her.
To be marked as Uchiha Madara’s, even if the man himself was dead, was a heavy burden to bear.
“You wanna talk about it?” Kisame asked him, stretched out on the bed. Itachi leaned back in his chair, his gaze unfocused.
“No. It’s better to let the dead stay in the past.”
Sakura had accepted that she was never meant for the whole soulmates business.
Times were getting tougher and she didn’t have time to spare any thought to it, but when the masked weirdo appeared with a Sharingan, her heart skipped a beat.
But it was Kakashi who went rigid beside them.
There was no major physical sign, that’s what she’d heard. Other than the first blooming of the marks, the marks never did anything to indicate the presence of the other half of the pair, but it was something you felt in the soul. That’s what Naruto had told her.
Kakashi took one careful step forward, his eyes fixated on the orange mask. “Is that you?” His voice seemed to waver, and Sakura realized what he meant right away. Her heart dropped to her stomach while Naruto’s rasengan seemed to slow in its formation.
The man only tilted his head. “Do we know each other?” he asked. His tone was casual, nonchalant and of course, Kakashi didn’t buy it.
“Save it. Just-is it you Obi-?” Kakashi was cut off by the man’s sudden disappearance, having to dodge a sudden barrage of kunai. Naruto and Sasuke interfered where they could but the man seemed dangerously focused on Kakashi.
He disappeared soon enough, despite Sasuke’s wildly spinning Sharingan tracking the traces left by his chakra. Almost as one, they turned to look at their captain. He looked empty as if all the warm had been drained from him. They huddled around their sensei, lending what comfort they could to him. Sakura couldn’t bear to see the lost look in his eyes. Her own mark felt...deader than usual.
Soulmates could be so selfish. It was nothing like the fairytales she had grown up reading and hearing. They could abandon you so easily, via criminal organizations or death.
They were soon faced with the reality of a war none of them had been expecting.
Sakura had come to accept that she would never get to meet her soulmate.
It was as good as fact to her, something she didn’t question anymore. She was learning to live with it. Tsunade had done it, and she was her student in this too. As she drove a fist through another white Zetsu, her neck throbbed. She spun into a kick, kicking a head off clean. She felt exhausted, and her neck wouldn’t stop burning. She’d think someone had poisoned her if her mind hadn’t become almost startlingly clear.
Everything seemed still around her. Sasuke stepped into view, his expression fearful. Why did he look afraid? She was about to question him when she realized it. He was afraid for her. Itachi stood nearby, his face grim and eyes pitying. She felt a whisper somewhere, but no one had spoken.
“Sasuke?” she tried, trying not to step back when he reached out towards her. His fingertips touched the corner of the soul patch, peeling off a bit. She tried to breathe, and he tried to school his expression into something more reassuring before she let him peel it off completely. And he stayed quiet, exchanging a glance with his brother.
She hated being left in the dark.
“What is it?” Had it faded away? That had never happened before, to anyone. Not even Orochimaru had been able to get rid of his mark, to the quiet glee of Jiraiya.
“It’s...it’s normal again,” Sasuke told her hoarsely. “Not grey.”
“What the fuck does that even mean?” Sakura asked. It hadn’t changed until now, and they were way past the whole resurrection fiasco. Anyone who had to be resurrected had been, and most of them were gone already. Tsunade’s mark had bloomed to life when she met Dan again.
Sasuke looked like he really didn’t want to tell her.
He didn’t have to. There was something coming their way. Akamaru whimpered at the dense chakra and Sakura was tempted to follow along, because she felt it. She felt the pull Ino had described, the breathlessness Naruto had struggled with. Her eyes drifted away from her teammate and locked onto the figure now in their line of sight.
She wanted to scream.
The first thing she saw was the wild hair that looked like it had a life of its own. The intimidating armor, complete with the gunbai. The eyes spinning with Sharingan that matched the one on her neck. He stopped next to Obito on a cliff overlooking the rest of the battlefield, and time seemed to slow down as Sakura watched his eyes slowly shift to her. They blazed, and Sakura could almost feel the color bleed into the mark on her neck. She felt the world slip out from beneath her and she felt Sasuke’s hand slip into hers. Uchiha Madara.
“No,” she gasped.