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Upon waking that day, Jervis Tetch didn’t think it was going to be remarkable. Not that he didn’t think he’d enjoy it, heavens no. The Englishman liked to consider himself an optimist by nature, believing for the best to occur-- even if others would debate it was a case of him being stubborn or in denial. However, as stated: Jervis didn’t wake from his slumber with a particular sense that on that day, things would be different . He hadn’t felt the presence while he was making breakfast for Jonathan. And he most certainly didn’t feel the shift as he had been doing household chores well into the night: there was nothing remarkable about folding laundry, after all.
It wasn’t until his flatmate had sauntered out of his study, a look of determination upon his face, that Hatter had suspected something of IMPORTANCE would occur.
“Jonathan… is everything alright? ” Jervis asked, head tilted in worry. Jonathan didn’t seem to make much of it.
"Hm? Oh, yes, everything is rather fine, indeed. Jervis? There's something I've been meaning to say for a while now." He wasn't nearly as nervous as the situation called for him to be, oh no, not in the slightest.
"You can go on chasing rainbows and shadows, I won't stop you. I will not stand in the way of what you want, but I want you to know..." He had drawn up close to his housemate now, standing directly in front of him, his smile and gaze both playfully devious.
"You do have options. " Crane reached out, gently grasping either side of Jervis' head, pressing his lips against his, light electric tingles rising up as he did so. He lingered there only a moment before they parted, and Crane spun around, hands thrown up in victory: his relief and excitement bubbling up into a rumbling chuckle.
"Oh, marvelous."
And he began to walk away, completely satisfied with himself. It didn't matter now, he'd be leaving, as he refused to live this way any longer. But he had said his piece, months of pent up frustration let go in one simple action. He felt light, free, practically giddy.
Jervis, meanwhile, didn’t feel as light.
If anything, he was now weighed down with far too many questions. Many of them that had transpired as Jonathan’s lips were against his own. ‘ What is this? ’ and ‘Why? ’, of course, reigning in the forefront of his mind. Others didn’t get a chance to be fully processed outside of a swirl of confusion, as-- just as quick as it had come-- the taller man had taken back his surprise gift. The Englishman had watched, mouth agape as Jonathan turned and walked away.
It took every ounce of mental fortitude to wake up his senses to do SOMETHING.
“J-Jonathan!” Laundry forgotten, the shirt he had been folding falling to the ground the moment his friend kissed him; Jervis, instead, nearly tripped over it on his way past Crane-- blocking his entrance so he couldn’t run back to his study.
“No, stop. Please. I… What was that ?” A kiss, clearly . Hatter knew the sarcasm was to follow, and quickly acted before Jonathan could. “No, I meant. Was that a joke? Were you joking? ”
It came off as far more demanding than he had intended. However, Jervis could barely think over the hammering of his heart within his chest to consider the implications of his own words. Mind abuzz with frantic energy-- the idea that this was the moment he had been waiting for. Hatter couldn't help the optimism that swelled inside him, even as his nerves plagued him with doubt.
Mood instantly soured, Crane frowned, giving Jervis a deadpan stare.
"None , of my flirting has ever , been a joke, Jervis Tetch. You " He pointed an accusatory finger at him. "simply insisted on shrugging it off as such." His arms were crossed now.
"For future reference, a solid no is far less painful than purposeful ignorance ."
Where Jonathan looked displeased, Hatter’s eyes merely opened wider in shock-- taking in every word. He wasn’t joking. Nor had he ever been. In that moment many different occasions came to mind-- words said, hands and where they were placed. Gestures of Jonathan’s own affection for him. All things Jervis had brushed aside as him looking too deeply in on the matter.
And the fact his hare had been going about this for some time, no doubt seeing everything the Englishman did as an act of cruelty...
“Oh… oh, Jonathan. I assure you, I… I truly hadn’t known.” Hoped, hating himself for daring to do so. But never had it been purposeful. Jervis stood straighter, letting his arms nestle close to himself as his mind tried grasping on how to continue. How was he supposed to think , when his mind wanted him to latch onto so many different topics at once? Jonathan kissed him. He had been flirting with him. He desired him, more so than in the platonic aspect of their current relationship.
Jonathan Crane wouldn’t reject him.
These all came to the Englishman in a strange sense of relief. Oh, for so long he had WORRIED . Fretted over himself crossing boundaries. Never knowing what was too much , and oh… Oh the own pain he had felt during this strange lobster quadrille of theirs. Jervis began to laugh softly to himself, even as his eyes began to prickle with tears.
“Jonathan, you ridiculous man . Putting up with me all this time. I’m sorry. I truly am. ” Gloved hand went to dab at his eyes. “Oh, and here I am, confusing you all the more, no doubt. I apologise for what I unwittingly put you through. But let it be known, my intent was never to string you along. Never to brush your feelings aside. I… I had thought -- you said you didn’t do relationships. How was I supposed to take things, after that?”
Ah. That had not been the reaction Crane had been expecting, in the slightest. So his first assumptions had been correct, they'd been on the same page, after all. Sort of. Watching the man who had been holding his heart captive, weeping in front of him, emotions laid bare, was both satisfying, and heart wrenching.
"I don't do relationships." Pause. A quick shrug of his shoulders. "As a rule." Another pause, arms uncrossed, hands placed on Jervis' shoulders. He sighed, and locked eyes with those brilliant blues.
"Let me try this again. Jervis Tetch, I ask you with the utmost respect and sincerity: would you care to be my exception?"
What Jonathan was asking would have happily fit in within the pages of a book, or a line said by the hero of old spaghetti westerns he used to find so much delight in as a child. It felt unreal , as if Jervis had been dreaming about the day’s events-- only for this to now turn to the most fanciful, exposing his innermost wishes.
The Englishman would have readily believed it, if it weren’t for the fact this uttering of beautiful sentimentality only caused him to blubber more.
“I’m sorry.” Jervis laughed more, truly seeing the ridiculousness in the situation. “I’m ruining the moment. It’s just, I never thought… ”
Hatter almost felt childish with the way he used the back of his hand against his eyes- wiping them away as he was more than aware of the hands still on his shoulders.
“I need to confess something as well, if you don’t mind. I’m sure it will seem terribly evident by this point, yet… Do you recall when I first ran off? Back home to Warrington, all those months ago?”
And what had happened with his parents after that, though Jervis was sure he hadn’t needed to remind Jonathan of that incident. So instead he carried on.
“I… wasn’t completely truthful at the time. While I assure you, I wasn’t upset with you. I, well… I must confess, you were at the heart of the matter, aha.” Laughter felt refreshing, after so much heartache. “I must admit… I was awfully frightened then. We were getting along so well, I didn’t wish to make things grow awkward between us. I had hoped the trip away would allow me ample time to see I was wrong. That I was so desperate for affection, that I was twisting things out of proportion.”
A smile, as he looked Jonathan in the eyes.
“However… it’s as the old adage goes: distance only makes the heart grow fonder .”
Crane frowned as he recalled how upset he had been-- how heartbroken, to discover Jervis had trusted Edward Nygma before him-- and how much sense it all made now. No, of course he wouldn't feel as if he could talk to Jonathan about that. But Edward had known. He had known and hadn't said anything.
Selina's insistence he talk to Jervis about it … she had known, too. How many others? How many of them stood back and watched them make complete fools of themselves?
None of that mattered now; it was over, they could stop playing games and make this strange little alliance official. The frown dissipated, a soft, tired smile taking its place.
"I'm taking that as a yes , then."
“Please do.” This was spoken with his own fondness, as Hatter’s happiness killed any of the nervousness he would have felt otherwise. And it was then, no doubt looking as unattractive as he could-- eyes swollen from his tears-- that Jervis went to gently cup the taller man’s face.
“Jonathan… do you mind if I ask something of my own?”
"Go on." Jonathan raised a curious brow.
“Will you kiss me again?”
Jonathan smirked, amusement evident, but otherwise gave into the request. (After having wanted to do so for so long, he was now getting two chances within one day? Lucky him. ) Jervis had met the man halfway, his own desire more than evident. While the first kiss had been brisk-- there and then gone just as soon as it had arrived-- this time there had been no fear of reciprocation. No need to steal and run when the invitation was given . Lips met, and Jervis couldn’t help the shaky whistle from his nose as Jonathan pressed himself closer to his person.
Jonathan brought a hand up to cradle the back of Jervis' head, long fingers buried into his hair, deepening the kiss: months of desire and pining culminating to this moment of electrically charged passion.
He pulled away, reluctantly, resting his chin on Jervis' shoulder, smirking lazily as he murmured into his ear,
"Just so we're clear, my offer to help you move out of Gotham and find a nice young woman to settle down with, has officially expired."
Jervis Tetch couldn’t find it within him to be saddened by the news.