Chapter Text
There were few things that had instilled fear in me since the summer of 1985. After becoming witness to the monsters from my fantasy Dungeons and Dragons game come into reality, to seeing the life drain from the eyes of those against us and to be close to the brink of death, my sense of fear was warped.
Even without all the monsters, Russian spies and government agencies, the true horror is coming home to no one.
Despite the previous incidents where I've been out past curfew. Putting my own life in danger, having my parents see me in the back of an ambulance car, or after the shadow monster incident how me and everyone else involved were gone for another two days in quarantine. How I had shown up at home to just my father asleep in the living room, my mother out and about only to come home later and make a fuss about the bags under my eyes, dirt under my nails and cuts and scrapes all over my arms and legs from running in tunnels, disguising the shed, running, endless running. The third occurrence, again being gone for days, only to show up at home with a bruised face, busted lip and an unspoken fear of being alone. That for those three months when I was still able to have El near I was back to being with her constantly because we had both come so close to losing each other.
This time around was different. I and others had thought that El worked up the strength to manipulate her powers full time, that when we were just prepubescent little kids she wasn't strong enough to withstand herself. But her powers were dormant this time around and it hit everyone full force that she's still just a girl, one with the fate of the world always on her shoulders.
With her and Will gone, the party has dispersed. We all started high school and tried our best to suppress the summer and try to get back to normal as quickly as possible. Within the first half of the year I was the one set back. Still waiting and hoping that Miss Byers would return with El and Will. But after their third visit down here, El had broken down, confessing that being in Hawkins was too difficult, brought up too many bad memories and the tragedy of Hopper's death.
Hopper's death is still something my mind has refused to accept. Because a guy as brutish and stubborn as him just doesn't go down that easy. He was untouchable in my mind, and when I had confessed that to El she just broke down all over again.
After the first half of that year and El confessing the pain Hawkins gives her, I had taken to visiting her in Illinois whenever possible. Which had turned out to be at least once every other month, and if I was lucky and worked enough odd jobs, I had spent the occasional three day weekend and holiday over there. We still had the coms as a form of communication, Dustin had sent Will off with the instructions of how to build their own radio tower. And Will had actually figured out how to get it onto a much smaller scale due to Joyce's complaints of how much it had stood out upon their new house. But these days it's rare to hear anything emitting from my com.
It's true what they say about high school. It just expands the cliches and theres a place for everyone to fit into. Lucas had become involved in sports, training with his teammates everyday after school, being away a lot at games, he even made varsity basketball his freshmen year. Max had broken up with Lucas in the middle of freshmen year and they weren't able to patch things up as well this time around, they talk but it's not always civil. Max hung around the skaters, also branded as the stoners, it's mostly guys and the occasional girl who just wants to date a bad boy. Dustin came into high school disappointed with how terrible the A/V department was and restarted the club from scratch, he is the one that has changed the least and I am so greatful for his persistence. We all have joined the A/V club for old times sake, but Lucas is most times too busy to show up and Max just blows it off a lot.
I actually talk to Max the most out of all of them because we have three classes together. She takes a different tone with me because her outside exterior is a bitch that can't be crossed. But due to the shared trauma she puts away her act.
But with me I've become more of a floater this year. Half of my heart belongs in Illinois while the other half stays here to endure the necessary education. Because of my main focus being El, being involved in extra curriculum, hell just being involved with high school in general wasn't a priority to me, so while others set their goals and shot for the stars and branched out, I kept to myself and this alternative life I led on the side.
That was until the next summer had rolled around.
•••
"I think it'd be great for him Ted." My mother submissively piled seconds onto my father's plate as he glowered towards me. "Time away from Hawkins, I'm sure Joyce would be able to help him get a job out there, it'd give him a good experience and teach him about responsibility."
"He's too young." He waved my mother away as she sat his plate down.
"I'm sixteen dad." I had spoken, releasing the hold I had on myself. If I was going to convince him to let me go that would mean that I couldn't lash out like an over emotional brat. "And you told me that when you were my age you went to work on Aunt Jo's farm for a summer." The stories of him and his cousins goofing off on a farm are probably just about the only good memories my dad has.
And with that I could tell he was convinced. "Alright. If you could make the money up to get your own bus ticket then go ahead. And don't go getting mixed up in all that craziness again. I hear one word again about any sort of trouble down there and you'll be sorry." He gestured with his fork and I nodded as nicely as I could muster.
•••
"Here sweetie let me take that." Joyce was here alone to retrieve me from the bus station. It was 4 in the morning and I was wide awake with excitement. "You have a good trip?" She asked after hugging me and I nodded following her off to her car.
"El and Will really wanted to be here when you came but they had something set in stone before you had made plans to come down." She looked at me apologetically and I just smiled.
"No that's fine, I have all summer to be with them." I shrugged and she gave me a tired smile in return before starting the car up.
The small town of Willowbrook was just an hour away from Chicago. The new Byer house was on the end of a culdasac and compared to the old house, this one was huge. It had four bedrooms, a basement, an upstairs and a screened in porch that led to the pool in the backyard.
"This place is nice, it's great you guys have this out here." I said sincerely and her eyes had misted over as she nodded.
"This wouldn't have been possible without Hop." She pressed a closed fist to her mouth as she looked at his photo on the mantle, along with Wills drawing of Bob. The living room was a huge open space with the wooden beams going diagonally toward the fireplace drawing your eye directly towards them. Two fallen heros.
I stood in awe for a moment. Joyce had always been the parental figure in my life when I was unable to go to my parents. She has a better understanding of how to deal with kids than my parents had, and it's the first time that I'm recognizing the hell she's been through.
The older I get and the more the impending doom of the upside down ages me mentally I sympathize with the adults in my life more frequently.
To be standing across from the woman who has went through hell and back for her son's safety and suffered not only one great loss but two. El had explained to me a long time ago that Hopper was her high school sweetheart, and I am just floored with greif for the first time in awhile. Without El being there everyday I didn't have to think about the impact of the situation but being around people who share trauma makes the feelings come rushing back. It was different back at home because they've tried so hard to forget that part of our lives. The one where we had almost died. The one where we had seen people die.
I held my arms out and hugged her and with a sigh she accepted, she heaved a small sob and buried her nose in my shoulder with small sniffles. "You're getting too tall Mike." She croaked. "You boys are getting so big, I can't believe it sometimes that you were so little, dealing with so much." She shook her head pulling back and held my face between her hands.
"El's gonna be so happy to see you again. She was so nervous and Will had to keep telling her to calm down." She laughed wiping my tears with her thumbs.
"Thank you, again for letting me stay for the summer." I uttered out and she shook her head.
"If I had it my way Mike, you'd stay here forever." I wasn't opposed to that. She knew my parents, they'd never come to understand me the way she does. Imagine a world where I just dropped everything and lived out the rest of my life here with Joyce, Will and El.
"I'm gonna get some sleep." I said quietly and she nodded her head quickly.
"Yes, of course. Yours is Will's old room the one across from the bathroom on this main floor. He convinced me to let him move downstairs to Johnathans old room." She sat down on the edge of the couch, still looking towards the images on her mantle.
•••
The next day I had woken up just a little before noon, the room I was in had sliding glass doors that led to a little patio garden and I ventured out to wake myself up a little more. It was just a small little circular patio that surrounded a fountain that didn't even work. The shrubbery was dying and the only thing that seemed well taken care of back here was a garden bed of sunflowers that was right next to another sliding glass door. I glanced in to see pale yellow walls, a white nightstand, white bed frame with a pale pink bedspread, a white vanity and shoved into the edge of the mirror of that vanity was a prepubescent Polaroid of myself on Halloween. Other than that small detail the other signs of occupancy was the clutter of makeup on the desk, the pile of books on the floor and the Mickey Mouse phone on the nightstand.
El's room. I sighed walking back into my own. Her and Will should be back later on today. They had went to visit El's aunt for her birthday yesterday. I've never gotten anxiety about seeing her before but it's been months since I've been able to, and each time I've visited in the past it hits me just as hard as it did the first time, of how much I loved her and the pain I've suppressed from being away.
I get to spend two and a half months with her and I already dread letting her go again.
•••
I was sitting in my room reading a paperback copy of White Noise by the time I heard El, Will and Joyce come back. I closed the book trying to decide if I should rush out and greet them or wait for them to come to me but just as I opened the door I was greeted with the sight of El, her hand raised intending to knock. Her shocked expression turned into a huge grin as she made no hesitation to practically jump and wrap her arms around my neck with a shriek.
"I missed you!" We're the first words she uttered and I laughed hugging her back, so very thankful that I didn't have to flounder for words.
"Hey, I missed you too." I sighed and she pulled back still grinning as she looked at my lips, quickly kissing me before she stepped back and wrapped her hands around my arm.
"Will's in the living room." She pulled me along through the hallway and I got the chance to admire her. Her hair was set in one braid going down to her shoulder blades, she had on a light green top and white skirt, dressed for the hot summer. Once we got to the living room I stopped at the sight of my best friend who was stood at the kitchen island picking at the fruit his mother had just washed.
His hair was shorter and styled upwards rather than the bowl cut we always twined with. I blinked in astonishment, he wore a pale purple polo shirt tucked into some high end, acid wash, cavaricci pants, ones that few of the wealthier kids at my school donned.
"Mike!" He uttered through as his mouth was stuffed with grapes. He was almost as tall as me, his arms and face were much fuller. Last I heard he was gonna try out for the tennis team, seems like he got in. He walked over and pulled me into a hug clapping me on the back and I laughed pulling back and El let go of me to sit at the kitchen island to also snack on the grapes.
"Dude, you're huge, what do you do? Bench 500s?" I punched his arm for good measure and he winced anyways, pretending to rub soreness away.
"No, it's just everyone that does sports at our school has to do summer conditioning. El doesn't like it very much." He snickered, and I looked over at her in confusion.
"I joined the swim team." She rolled her eyes. "But I didn't compete for this whole season because I was awful."
"Yeah, but to be fair your previous experiences with water weren't very helpful." Will said with a sympathetic smile and El's lips went into a slight frown. She doesn't like to be reminded about her days at the lab.
"So, kids" Joyce clapped her hands together gaining our attention she placed a white envelope on the table, shouldering a handbag. "This is money for pizza tonight, sorry I couldn't stay here with you guys for tonight but my boss offered me the night shift and I just had to take it because they've been cutting so many of my hours lately-"
"Mom it's fine, don't worry." Will placed his hands on her shoulders to stop her ramblings and her face softened as she patted his face.
"Alright, well you guys be good. Don't wait up either, I probably won't get in until 5am anyways." She grumbled, blowing quick kisses towards me and El before rushing out the door.
We all stood in silence listening to her car pull out of the driveway before Will and El started quickly moving about the kitchen.
"You call Jen and Heather, I'll call Nath, Aaron and Tom." El threw a phone notepad towards Will and he nodded bounding off towards the living room.
"Wait, what's going on?" El started packing the fruit away in the fridge and she turned around with a sigh.
"Joyce only works this late at least once a month. So, Will and I like to host small get togethers with some kids from school." My excitement obviously didn't match hers and she rubbed my arm. "I really want you to meet my friends. I want them to see the boy I can't shut up about." She grinned, her smile being contagious. I couldn't help leaning in and stealing a kiss.
"Uh, Jen and Heather are coming, but Jen was with Michelle when I called so she kinda invited herself." Will interrupted and El pulled away with a frown.
"I'm fine with her, as long as she doesn't pull the crud she did last time." El held her hand out for the phone note pad and Will tossed it over.
With El leaving the room I looked towards Will who was pocketing the pizza money, pausing when he saw me. "What'd Michelle do?"
Will rolled his eyes. "She was trying to show off. She brought beers and some other hard liquor." He waved his hand dismissively. "But nothing like that should happen tonight. This is just a hang out, with good music, some pizza, maybe even some games."
"Like D&D?"
Will, being caught off guard knocked the potpourri bowl off the counter. And we both cursed fumbling to pick up the scattered pieces of dried rose petals and whatever the hell else is in potpourri.
"I uh, the guys I hang with," We got all the contents back in the bowl and I placed it back on counter for him. "They don't play D&D." He said quietly. "We play party games, if we're in the mood. Like charades, or seven minutes in heaven. Most times we end up playing red hands just because there's no set up and those dumb jocks just want to show off their strength."
Just as I was about to ask who exactly participated in seven minutes of heaven, El walked into the room tossing the phone book down.
"All set. I'm gonna go get cleaned up." She turned away and started walking towards her room then turned around. "Mike? Aren't you coming?"
"Oh, uh." I glanced at Will to see if it would bother him but he just simply waved to me as he took the back stairs to the basement. And with that I joined Eleven.
***
"I like-" El interrupted me with a kiss. "Your room-" Another kiss. "Very pretty." More kisses. "Very you." She stopped with a laugh.
"Are you gonna talk the entire time I kiss you?" She threw herself back onto her mismatched pillows, placing her feet on my lap. But I had pushed them off and crawled to the top of the bed to rest against the pillows too. Shoulder to shoulder, I reached for her hand and intertwined her fingers with mine.
"I've missed you a lot." I said quietly. "And I meant to visit sooner but you know how my dad is." I grumbled and she wrapped her other arm around the one that was holding her, cuddling into my side. "I feel like I've missed so much within that time." The smiley girl of Willowbrook looked at me apologetically, almost as if I broke past the smile she put up and if I kept on with my own pity party she'd burst into tears. I tucked her hair behind her ear and smiled.
"You've changed. Good changes." I assured her and the sad eyes vanished as I continued to pet her head. "You speak really good-"
"Well." She corrected with a small giggle and I rolled my eyes.
"You speak well." I ruffled her head and she groaned but I went back to petting. "You made more friends, you and Will are close and that's amazing." She busied herself by playing with my shirt while I praised her. "You finished your first year in high school." I sighed. "I'm not sad because you're changing. I'm sad because I can't be there while you do." I admitted.
She sat up still holding my hand, her eyes glanced at the door making me look there too but I saw nothing but the door cracked open.
"I wanted you here too." She said quietly she looked down at our hands. "I wanted everyone here."
"Lucas stopped calling. The last I've heard from him he had just gotten a job at that camping store." So that would've been nearly 10 months ago. "Max called two weeks ago, but her most of her calls were cut short because her friends would stop by and ask to hang out." I myself have hung out with Max a total of eight times outside of school and each time she ran into one of the other skaters and rain-checked me, or when at a party, just not even say a word and ditch me completely. "And Dustin is almost tied with you. He's always calling to tell me about quantum mechanics and he's been working hard to find a way to get my powers back." She frowned. "I don't have the heart to tell him that they're probably never going to come back." Well that's new, he never told me that he was trying to find a way to get her powers back. I wasn't even aware he had contacted her that much.
El got out of bed letting go of my hand to rummage through her clothes, which was the whole purpose of us being in here. I scrambled for something to say. "Maybe we could see if we could possibly round the party up? Just for one weekend?" I asked covering my eyes as she gestured for me to do so.
"Would they even come?" She asked. I could still hear her shuffling with the clothes and I shrugged.
"I know Max would come, any excuse to get out of that town. Her mom would even be more than willing to have her come up here too to get her to stop hanging out with all those boys." I snorted. "Dustin would come because you're what he calls his favorite discovery."
"Cute." She deadpanned. I felt her hand pulling mine away from my eyes and I blinked for a second before feeling my face heat from the blood rushing to my head.
She had put on a pair of denim overall shorts. Underneath the overalls she had on a grey Talking Heads shirt, which she may have gotten from Johnathan. Not noticing my shock she walked over to her vanity to begin doing her makeup.
"No hope for Lucas?" She asked and I shook my head to clear it.
"It'd be hard to get him down here since he has practice for baseball." I watched as she did a dusting of pink around her eyes, blushed her cheeks and lined her lips and tinted them. But she made eye contact with me through the mirror then looked back at herself then went to grab some tissues to wipe the stuff she put on her lips off.
"I want them to come down here only if they really want to. I mean I know Max and Lucas aren't together anymore. I wouldn't want to force them to stay in this house together." She then went to work on her hair, taking it out of it's braid and running her hands through it, with just the right amount of poofy waves she turned back to me in a wordless question.
"You look great." I said immediately. "Should I have gotten changed?" We both looked over my outfit which was a black t shirt from the Sylvan Beach in New York, I hadn't even gone there, my mom must have gotten it at a garage sale. I also had a pair of black jeans that were accidentally ripped at the knees. If most kids at my school didn't know I was a major nerd, most people would probably assume I was a wannabe grunge band member which it's music was slowly creeping it's way into my rural high school, which Max would usually tell me all about. Her and I had a habit of trading cassette tapes back and forth during classes. My collection back home was probably more hers than mine.
Just as El was about to comment on what I was wearing the doorbell rung and she looked back at me with a shrug. "Too late."