Chapter Text
The last 35 years haven't been kind to the Archangel Gabriel, depending on your perspective of the matter. The first 20 of them were of him thrown into a shocked silence. No orders of the great plan's Armageddon and the plans the rest of the angels wanted to make in order for it to happen. So it seemed, for that short amount of time, that the angels continued on without a purpose. And whenever a colleague asked him about it he would play it off, telling them to wait and be patient. Mostly everyone thought that he had a plan. He didn't. Well, he didn't right up until the dawn of the 20th year, where he realized there was only one thing he could do at this point.
The next 10 years were simply spent looking for ex-angel, Aziraphale. He had widely been regarded as a newly fallen, but Gabriel had grown to believe that maybe that wasn't quite true after all. Even if Gabriel himself was the one that started that rumor in the first place.
It was much harder than he anticipated. His first thought was to track the angel through his miracle usage, but it seemed that in later years he had been using less and less to the point where he hadn't used a single one in 5 years. That worried the archangel initially, though he realized it might've been due to the lack of holy connection Aziraphale had had over time.
Going through all the miracles. All of the locations. There was one that had struck him as odd. It was the 5th to last miracle (the last was to help a cat out of a tree), and by the reports it was from a very different location than all of the previous miracles. It was performed by turning a rusty bottle cap into a perfect sand dollar. Gabriel wondered about the nature of the miracle, for what reason would a sand dollar be worthy of a miracle?
He thought to ask when he arrived.
The last 5 years were something more of a brace period for him. He had appeared at the outside of his house early in the morning on the same day he realized where Aziraphale was hiding. Peering in through the window, he didn't expect his own jarring reaction.
He had somewhat gathered that there was a large possibility that Aziraphale and the demon Crowley would still see each other throughout the time Gabriel had been looking for him. But, what he didn't expect was to see them together now. Asleep in each other’s arms on the sofa in the cottage living room.
As an angel you can feel the emotions of anyone that came in contact with them. Particularly good and pure emotions rang the most true. What Gabriel also hadn't expected was to have the presence of a particular emotion hit him like a brick wall the moment he entered the area. That emotion being love, of course. If he was being honest with himself, the next 3 years alone were spent in anger and swore that he would never go back to that blasted cottage. The last 2, merely in a frustrating curiosity that he knew had to be satiated.
And so, he suddenly appeared once again on the front steps of the cottage 3 months into the 35th year.
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Gabriel clacked his knuckles lightly against the red wooden door. Perhaps a bit too lightly. He knocked again, this time a bit too hard. It didn’t seem to matter as nobody answered anyways. He looked about him and noticed that old vehicle the demon drove was not parked in the designated parking area.
This was a bad idea anyways. He went to disappear for several more years of uncertainty until a loud thud came from around the back of the cottage. He found his feet moving on their own while his mind raced on all of the reasons for his actions being completely unfounded.
This really was a bad idea. Down the steps and back around the corner, along the edge of the house were many different pots of all shapes and sizes. As well as a variety of gardening tools.
He has no reason to confront Aziraphale, especially after all of these years. No reason for him to show up at the doorstep. He finds his way to the corner, peeking into the backyard. There are a large assortment of crops. All of which are growing beautifully and to their fullest capacity.
What was he even going to say when he saw-
Around the corner his feet took him and he didn’t see the angel anywhere. Further, he found a couple big bags of dirt, a box of fertilizer, and an unbelievable amount of flowers. He bent down and picked up a pot that had the flower that attracted him most. It was the softest blue and seemed to crane its receptacle towards the ground, as if shy. The state of the flower was something he found he could relate to in a strange way, and it was the first time he ever found himself relating to someone, something, anything.
A loud clatter snapped his attention up to an open shed with a man wearing a farmers hat and overalls standing just outside of its doors, “Gabriel?”
The Archangel paled. He, for once in his life, found himself at a lack of words. The expression on Aziraphale’s face was that of fear for several moments, seemingly waiting for Gabriel to make his move. But, he found himself stuck there, holding onto this tiny pot with these sad little flowers almost kissing his fingers. He thought that maybe he should put the flowers down, that maybe it would be the polite thing to do in this moment. Though, he couldn’t bring himself to part with it. It seemed to be the only thing that was keeping him from turning around and flying back from where he came. The flower was reminding him that he had to do this. He couldn’t leave until he at least said something.
“Why are you here, Gabriel?” Aziraphale’s voice was not filled with fear at this point, but more of something more stern.
“I…” Where was he to start? What would he say after all this time of just working up the courage to talk to him? Would this even solve anything in the end? “I wanted to talk,” was what he settled on.
“I don’t want to talk. Not with you,” Aziraphale took a stance that made it look like he was about to fight him.
“I’m not here to hurt you, Aziraphale,” Gabriel’s grip tightened on the pot. He wasn’t saying the right things. He wasn’t saying the things that he needed to say.
“And why should I believe that you have not come to harm us? We’ve lived peacefully here since the events of Armageddon and we intend to keep living this peaceful life. You and the rest of your soldiers, leave. Now.” Taking several steps forward over the discarded tools, his face is stoic and angry- in a way Gabriel hasn’t seen it before. This was not like the almost execution. There was something different about that moment. There was a level of anger to him then, but also an amount of smugness. Here, he was being territorial, protective.
“Aziraphale,” he realized that he would have to talk much faster to get the angel to let his guard down, “There is no one else here. I am the only one who even knows that you two live here. I’ve known you’ve been living here for a little over five years now.”
His face fell into confusion,” Then why did you come to us now? Why not five years ago?”
“I was afraid you didn’t want to see me. And I didn’t know what I was going to say once I got here.”
“I’m afraid I don’t understand,” the gardeners voice was much less hard than it was before.
“I wanted you to help me understand,” Gabriel attempted to keep his posture confident as he normally does, though he uncharacteristically found that he wanted to curl in on himself and not deal with this situation anymore. It really was intimidating, the way Aziraphale held so much power over him in this moment.
Aziraphale then let out a baffled huff,” What could I possibly help you with? I was under the impression that you thought you knew everything.”
He gulped,” I did. But, then I realized that I didn’t. After the Armageddon that didn’t happen, I found myself angry for a long time. Everyone looked to me to continue with the war plans, but something always held me back from carrying them out. I think it was you."
"Me?"
"Yes. You and the demon."
Aziraphale's face hardened again," The demon's name is Crowley."
Gabriel blinked," Crowley. You and Crowley," he was sweating and his throat felt dry. He was having reactions that he had absolutely so control over, such human reactions," Why do you want to live as one of them?"
"To live as what? As a human?"
Gabriel nodded.
The angel took a deep breath in, in thought, letting it out slowly," I have a fondness for them. I'm fond of what they've created. We, as angels, have been given everything that we could ever need. That even includes creating things that we may need or simply appearing wherever is convenient. Humans never got that. They had to make everything they need or want. And with that need to do so, they've created a truly beautiful world, Gabriel. They are flawed, and may do horrible things… but for every bad human, there are several good ones there to remind me that this world is worth it. They also make for excellent conversation, I assure you."
"Their mortality-"
"Is a shame, yes. I've seen many friends, very good people, pass from the very first years of me walking among them. I would never want to be mortal myself. I don't desire to be a human, Gabriel. However, there is something to learn from any new person that we meet, even if it's something you don't want to hear," Aziraphale still held himself with anxiety, but he was speaking of truths. The archangel could feel his warm, positive emotions seep through his turtleneck.
"What could be learned from creatures that barely live past 40 years?" The question came from a place of ignorance, but a true need for a genuine answer was there. Almost like a string that was pulled taut and was just waiting for a chance to break. This was the question, Gabriel realized, he needed to have answered.
For the first time since they saw each other since Armageddon, Aziraphale smiled lightly," Young eyes bring new perspectives."
That string seemed to snap, and Gabriels head fell mimicking the pale blue flowers he gripped so tightly to his chest. He's taught himself that the only thing that he needed to trust is his own opinion. For Heaven's sake, he's even been told to trust his instincts and his alone. There was a reason why he was an archangel, after all. He figured maybe he should see where other's instincts lead them.
Something spilled out of him then that hadn't been fully realized. Something that was sitting there, festering on his tongue for the last 35 years and he was unable to stop it, “I don’t believe that I can apologize for carrying out what I believed the Almighty’s plan was. But, I do feel genuine remorse for attempting to execute you for doing what you believed was the Almighty’s plan and I apologize completely and wholly for that. I’m sorry that that happened to you, that was my fault,” saying it made something swell in his chest. Something of a mixture between sorrow and relief.
A light laugh, full of no real humor came from Aziraphale,” I never, in all of my years, would've ever thought you would say those words to me. I think you may have misunderstood my intentions though, unfortunately.”
Gabriel tilted his head slightly,” What do you mean?”
“During Armageddon, I was not so much concerned for what I believed God’s plan was. I realize now, I was concerned for the people and beautiful creatures that live here,” He gestures around at his luxurious garden, full with the busy buzzing of honeybees.
“The almighty created this world for a reason, it would be quite silly if we were just to destroy it because of some fated war don’t you think?”
Gabriel blinked.
The gardener finally turned back around to pick up his supplies and brought it over to the pile he’d created at the Archangel’s feet. It was the first time they were able to get a good look at each other. Aziraphale looked youthful, full of life. As if he welcomed the idea of eternity and was ready to watch it pass by peacefully. Gabriel, on the other hand, looked sunken and grey. His shoulders were weighed down with such a force that he often wondered if this is how it felt to fall.
"Do you like those?" He said, pointing at the pot in the archangel's hands.
Gabriel took a moment to answer, regarding the calming blue of them and the support that they had brought him in one of the biggest conversations he had in his entire life.
"Yes. I...I believe I do," he quickly held out the pot for the gardener to take them back.
Aziraphale's face seemed to glow, as he gently pushed the pot back into the archangel," They seem to like you. Would you like to help me plant them, Gabriel?"
"You want me to help you plant them?" He asked with slight incredulous.
"Yes."
Several seconds of silence passed. "Alright… but, I don't know how to do anything like this."
Aziraphale's warm hand rested lightly on Gabriel's shoulder," Don't worry, dear. I'll be there to teach you."
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Kneeling on the grass with rolled up pant legs and a discarded jacket, Gabriel sticks his hands into the soil for the first time. He shivers at the feeling.
"Excellent, Gabriel! You just need to get used to it, really. If you absolutely hate it you can wear some gloves. I typically use them just to avoid splinters or if Crowley just did my nails."
The archangel's awkward form was leaning over the bed of dirt. He was wiggling his fingers, feeling the wet and cool dirt completely," What do I do now?"
"Now, you dig a hole. A big and deep one to plant the roots of our friend here," he pulls the pot closer to them. Gabriel winced as he started to dig the hole, by trying to push the dirt away, making a rather sad small hole.
"Here," Aziraphale hands him a green trowel before instructing the archangel how to use it properly.
"Good, now; these are called Bluebells and they can grow very rapidly. Which is why we're planting them away from our garden,” he gestures up to the tree tops that protect them from the harsh sun,” and the shade is good for them. Too much direct sunlight won’t do them any good at all.”
They remain this way for several hours. Gabriel listens, and Aziraphale continues to explain as best as he can to an angel that has never known this kind of life. For each flower placed into the hole, they both work together to cover the holes back up with fresh soil. When the new bed is done they stand back to look at the work that they accomplished together. Gabriel found something within himself shift. Returned to him was some level of contentment he hasn’t felt in a very long time.
“Thank you,” he said, turning to Aziraphale.
“For what exactly?”
“For taking the time to explain it to me,” Gabriel looks down at his dirty hands. The angel takes a moment to look over his former-boss, his expression soft and warm.
“Of course, my dear,” He places a hand on Gabriel’s upper arm.”Now why don’t we head inside to get you cleaned up?”
All he thought to do was smile and nod. And Aziraphale, an angel and lover of a demon, welcomed an archangel into his home with open arms.