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Olympian Husbands Say Trans Rights!
FuzzBead Presents
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KATSUKI YUURI and VIKTOR NIKIFOROV, join us for WHAT DO YOU KNOW? This time we see who knows more about the o… Read more
Viktor looks down into his lap for a moment, gathering himself as Yuuri watches him amusedly. He lifts his head and directs a classic media smolder right into the camera.
“Hello,” he purrs. It’s all he can manage before he and Yuuri break into laughter.
Title card:
FuzzBead Presents: What Do You Know?
Featuring: Viktor Nikiforov and Katsuki Yuuri
“Which one of us do you think knows more about the other?” Yuuri asks, absent-mindedly spinning his coffee cup by its handle.
“I don’t know; I think you have a bit of an advantage,” Viktor hums. “I was never afforded the opportunity to fanboy over you for ten years before we met.”
Yuuri’s gasp is dramatic and scandalized, and Viktor nearly moves fast enough to dodge a smack on the shoulder.
“You had every opportunity, you just weren’t paying attention!” Yuuri laughs.
Viktor concedes, nodding. “Well, at least I have your mother to fill me in on everything I missed.”
What is “umami”?
Viktor and Yuuri can hardly even contain themselves at this point, they’re laughing so hard. Yuuri wheezes, doubled over, and Viktor has tears streaming down his face, a hand over his eyes to hide how badly they’ve creased.
“Okay, no, we have to--” Viktor says weakly, fanning his face, but he’s interrupted by a loud and distinct snort from his husband, and they dissolve into fits of giggles once again.
The shot jump-cuts to a few minutes later. Both men are actually breathing now, and a box of tissues has been added to the table in between their mugs.
Yuuri’s eyes flick in Viktor’s direction, full of amusement and embarrassment.
“I… didn’t even know what umami was until Viktor told me about it,” Yuuri admits, ignoring his husband’s snickering. “I didn’t know it was a thing, I-- shut up --I didn’t know it was a… what did you call it?”
“Flavor profile,” Viktor murmurs, his lips pursed tight around the words as if opening them would release another outburst.
Yuuri throws his hands up in exasperation. “Right?” It just means ‘delicious flavor’; it’s not like it’s some phenomenon of collective Japanese understanding!”
Viktor is clearly struggling to hold it together.
“But nooo, Mr. Gourmet here--”
Viktor loses it at ‘Mr. Gourmet.’ Maybe it’s Yuuri’s incredulous tone, or the way his lips grip the words at their edges as he gets himself worked up-- But Viktor’s laugh is high-pitched and breathy, his face flushed bright red.
“So… I guess that’s a point for Viktor?” Yuuri asks vaguely, looking out past the cameras. “I don’t know how the points work. Do you have a point system? No? I kind of feel like you should…”
Viktor busts up once more.
When is Russian Christmas?
“January 7th was the day I learned I’m allergic to poppyseeds,” Yuuri muses fondly. “I love poppyseeds.”
“I had to convince him to stop eating even after he broke out in hives,” Viktor says with a roll of his eyes. “We had to cut the collar of his Makkachin Christmas sweater.”
A blush blooms across Yuuri’s cheeks. “I have no regrets. I look forward to eating more this winter.”
Viktor claps his hands together. “Oh, my Yuuri, we’re tied! Just like in Paris!”
“That was a technicality because my costume lost a flower! Which was your responsibility, if you remember…”
Viktor throws an arm around Yuuri and pulls him close, cradling his head against his chest.
“Shhh…” he hums, smoothing back Yuuri’s hair. “We’re tied.”
“We’re tied,” Yuuri repeats, defeated into Viktor’s chest. The Russian skater looks up at the camera, thoroughly satisfied.
“Next?”
What are five ‘no-nos’ when visiting a Japanese hot spring?
Viktor holds up a finger to the camera, his eyes very serious.
“Tattoos,” he announces, “are usually frowned upon. Thankfully, only Yuuri has seen mine, because--”
“ Well,” Yuuri interrupts, his face blossoming bright rosy red again. “God, Vitya. Some places are getting more lenient. My hometown is old-fashioned.”
They both look up past the camera.
Subtitles: “You have a tattoo?”
“Yes! From my first Olympic gold,” Viktor says with a smile. “Wanna see?”
He stands and starts to unbutton his pants. Yuuri’s screech of horror (and anything too risqué for BoobTube) is cut off by the jump cut.
In the next shot, Yuuri is positively chugging his coffee, his bangs pushed back from his face, and there’s a visible pink twinge to Viktor’s cheeks and the tips of his ears. He holds up two fingers.
“Sex is probably an obvious one, but I had to learn the hard way... “
Yuuri covers his face with his hands, sinking from his chair down onto the floor.
“Don’t mind him,” Viktor says with a little chuckle. “He’s dramatic. Um, you have to shower before you go in, which is how I’ve been getting away with the sex after I got in trou--”
“Vitya!” (The interjection shows up in subtitles even though Yuuri is mic’ed, since he’s apparently sunk completely to the floor at this point.)
“--ble, oh hush, anata, ” Viktor laughs, throwing up four fingers. “Never go under… come to think of it, I learned that one when I learned number two… and keep your towel dry.”
He looks down beside him with a little chuckle before looking back up at the camera.
“Do I get five points for that?”
“No!” Yuuri yells from the floor.
“You know, when you think about it, these really aren’t about us,” Yuuri says, adjusting his chair so that he’s sitting cross-legged away from the table. “Just about our home countries.”
Viktor nods, sipping from his mug with a sideways glance. “Yeah, I’m not even Orthodox, I’m Catholic,” he murmurs.
“Are you really?”
Viktor’s glance shifts back to Yuuri, his eyes alight with mischief. “I don’t know--am I?”
Yuuri looks serious for a moment, first studying his husband’s face, then staring intently at the table in front of him. “You… well… God, you and Mamochka moved in 1991 so… maybe you are?”
“Do you know which country I’ve been to the most?” Viktor asks, his hands steepled in front of a little, secret smile as he escapes having to answer.
“Well, you visit your mother in Sofia after every competition, but you also find every excuse you can to go to Milan--”
“I love the food,” Viktor interjects.
“--so I’m going to go with Italy?”
“Ding ding ding! I’ll never beat you on personal trivia.”
What are the two main ingredients in borscht?
“Oh my god,” Yuuri says with dark amusement in his voice. “Who wrote these?”
“I hate borscht,” Viktor says with a scowl. “Mama always made it with beets, Mamochka made it with cabbage, and I can’t stand either.”
“You just said two!” Yuuri exclaims in exasperation, clapping a hand to his forehead. “What are we even doing?”
He sits back, hiding his laughter behind his mug. Viktor jumps to his feet, clapping his hands.
“This isn’t trivia, but I’ll tell you what I know. Katsuki Yuuri was born on November 29th, 1992 in Hasetsu in the Saga prefecture of Japan. That makes him a Saggitarius with a Capricorn moon, which, honestly, is so typical. He took tap dancing and ballet starting at age 3, he would kill a man for a single bite of katsudon, and he was internet famous for a while for his meta-analyses of every one of my juniors’ free skates under the name xXPoodle_Lover1225Xx. Once, I stepped out of the shower and walked around a bit before drying off my hair, because I like to let it air-dry, and I heard him say ‘Just like in my fanart’ but I’ve never found any evidence of it so internet--”
“--No,” Yuuri groans.
“--if you have any drawings of me with dripping wet hair made by someone named xXPoodle_Lover1225Xx or maybe 12YuuNiki25--”
“--Please, no--”
“--please at me on Instagram or Twitter and I’ll send you some free merch or something!”
“Beef!” Yuuri yells, throwing his hands in the air. “Borscht is beets and beef, obviously, point for me, can we please move on?”
“Okay, apparently moving on means plugs and promos,” Yuuri snorts, his head resting in his hands on the table as Viktor chats with some of the folks offscreen. “We’re choreographing Art on Ice in Zurich this year, aren’t we, dear?”
Viktor’s attention snaps back to the camera. “Yes! You’ll see my Yuuri up on a stripper pole, just like the day I fell in love with him!”
Yuuri’s voice pitches in volume as he tries to make himself physically bigger to block Viktor from view. “SO you can find more information in the link below--you can link this, right?--and otherwise, we’ll be visiting rinks around the world to run clinics for underserved kids for the remainder of this year, as well as kicking off the third year of Elevating Trans and Nonbinary Athletes, or ETNA, which provides resources, education, and scholarship money for emerging talents in the LGBTQ global community.”
“Trans rights!” Viktor cheers from behind his husband, who is looking inquisitively off-camera.
“Is that good? Was that enough?”