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The decorative gourds arrived at Whole Foods in mid-September. Zhenya saw the display set up in the produce section and lingered over it for a while, examining the different sizes and shapes. Studying them, he was increasingly convinced that Sid had been joking. Every squash had ridges or nubs, or a spiny stem at one end. There was no way.
Maybe if he trimmed off the stem and washed it really well.
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Where had Sid even gotten the idea? Zhenya went through the browser history on Sid’s tablet, expecting to find weird porn, but there was nothing. Had he spontaneously thought of it on his own? Sid could be kinky, but he wasn’t that creative.
“Stop making those noises at my tablet,” Sid said without looking up from his book. “It didn’t do anything to you.”
“I don’t make noise,” Zhenya said, and vengefully left the tab open to a video of sea slugs mating.
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❤️
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