Work Text:
When he got out from Grimmauld Place mantlepiece, Teddy couldn't even brush the ash from his robes before Al clung to his legs and James jumped on his back, putting his arms so tightly around his neck he almost chocked.
“Teddy!”
“You're here, finally!”
The way they welcomed him, you would almost think they hadn't seen each other in months rather than half a day before. At this rate, when he would come back for Christmas they would follow him even to the loo.
In truth, though, Teddy was really pleased by their overwhelming greeting, because the kids’ enthusiasm helped to take his mind off a certain, uncomfortable thought he had kept dwelling on the last few days and especially that morning.
Yes, from time to time they could be a bit much – especially James – but Teddy knew how to deal with their excitement: he had found out their greatest weakness since a long while, and he wasn’t scared to use it when the situation required it, like in that precise moment.
Teddy grabbed the two little, adorable brats and tickled them without mercy – he knocked two chairs while wrestling them, but beside that his move proved to be as effective as always, because Al e James finally let him free, begging him to stop between the laughs.
“I reckon it was well deserved,” said Ginny with a warm smile, pulling him in a hug. When Teddy let go, she sighed, looking him in the eyes. “I’m not sure I’m ready to let go of the best tickler of the house.”
Teddy felt a lump in his throat at these words, knowing she meant way more than that. “You’re a good tickler too,” he said sheepishly.
“But a way better Bat-Bogey Hexer,” said Ginny with a wink, making him chuckle.
“Oh, I can definitely vouch for that.”
Teddy whirled when at the sound of Harry’s amused voice behind his back. His Godfather was holding Lily on his hip, an arm under her bum and a grin upon his face.
“Edì!” said Lily with her little happy voice, squirming in Harry’s grip to lean toward Teddy, her stubby hands stretched in the air. “Hair!”
“Well, good morning to you too,” said Teddy with glee, taking her tiny hands in his. “Tell me, which color would you like today?”
“All!”
“All the colors?!” he asked, widening his eyes in pretended awe.
“Yes!” exclaimed Lily, her eyes shining with excitement.
“I wanna see too!” yelled James, rushing forward with Al in tow.
“What a surprise” chuckled Harry, ruffling Teddy’s hair with his free hand. “Seems like you’ll have an audience.”
“Make them green!” said Al.
“But green is for Slytherins!”
“James!” scolded Harry.
Ginny, on the other hand, looked at her son with narrowed eyes. “Do we really need to remind you that Andromeda is a Slytherin?”
James’ eyes widened in worry, and he searched Teddy’s gaze immediately. “I… I didn’t mean it like that...”
“I know you didn’t,” smiled Teddy. “But –“
“Edì, hair!”
He chuckled. “Someone is a little impatient, today.”
“Try always” grinned Ginny.
“Make them green too, please!”
“Yes, I’ll make green too, Al,” said Teddy, theatrically laying his fingers on his temples. “Be quiet, now… I need to concentrate.”
The three kids stared at him with widened eyes and gaping mouths when Teddy began uttering inexistent words with a dramatic voice. He kept speaking for a little, then he squeezed his eyes shut and in rapid sequence he turned his hair green, yellow, purple, red, pink, orange and blue again
Al and James cheered, Harry and Ginny clapped, but as always it was Lily who had Teddy’s favorite reaction, laughing with mirth, and he felt a surge of affection toward her. She had learned to say his name just a little while ago, and he hoped with all his might she wouldn't forget it during their months apart.
He was tying Lily on the baby chair beside the table when his granny arrived with his trunk. Teddy knew she had pretended to finish some chores just to give him a bit of time alone with the Potters, and he had really appreciated the thought. Nonetheless, he was glad she arrived, partially because he wanted to stay with all of them during breakfast, partially because they had waited for her to eat and, well, now he was starving.
It wasn’t the first time the Potters had used this empty house as a starting point for errands in London, but nonetheless Teddy had been very glad when Ginny had proposed to his gran to meet there to have breakfast together and then walk him to King’s Cross.
Despite the happy chats and Kreacher's delicacies, though, after a while the cheerful lightheartedness he had felt upon his arrival at Grimmauld Place faded away. He tried to keep up the facade, but he didn’t miss Harry’s mildly worried expression, nor the way he exchanged glances with his granny and Ginny.
When he was little Teddy had solemnly sworn that he would only look at that photo in Sirius’ room together with Harry, but for the first time he was regretting that promise.
He knew he should be grateful that Harry took a free morning for him – as if throwing him a surprise party with all the Weasley the afternoon before wasn’t already more than Teddy had expected – but he also knew that their conjoint visits to Sirius’s room often became an occasion for some deeper conversations, and he wasn’t sure he had the strength nor the words to explain what was troubling him.
As such, it was with a heavy heart that Teddy left the kitchen when Harry caught his gaze and nodded towards the ceiling.
Sirius’s room was exactly as he remembered, with its walls plastered by those weirdly motionless posters that gave it a scruffy vibe. Despite that, it had always been clean, because Kreacher insisted on spending his free days tidying up Grimmauld Place, and he was always happy to come by to help if the Potters used the house.
The bed creaked when Harry took a seat in his usual spot, patting the space beside him. “Come and join me, will you?”
Teddy nodded and sat down, and when Harry smiled at him he smiled back, hoping against hope that his godfather wouldn’t see through his pretense.
“So… ready for the great day?”
Teddy let his gaze wander on the motorcycle posters, carefully avoiding those with bikini-clad girls. He wasn’t a good liar, especially when it came to Harry.
“Yeah,” he said with a shrug, trying to sound casual, but he heard his godfather sighing, and he knew Harry wasn’t buying it.
“Are you sure? Because, well… I hope you don’t mind me saying it, but… you seem a bit down, you know?”
Teddy stayed silent, moving his eyes on a Gryffindor banners. Who knows, maybe he was going to be a Gryffindor as well, as his father and his friends before him… or as his godfather.
Harry put a hand on Teddy’s knee, squeezing it gently. “You know you can tell me if there’s something wrong, right?”
Finally, Teddy gathered the courage to nod, feeling his eyes prickling, and he blinked back the tears.
“I know it’s gonna be tough to be far from home for such a long time,” said Harry. “But… well, I thought you were eager to go to Hogwarts…”
“It’s not that,” clarified Teddy hastily. “I mean… of course I’m going to miss you all, but…”
It was a stupid thought, the one that kept popping in his mind uninvited, and he despised himself a bit for realising it just before he had to leave, making everything harder.
“But?” prompted Harry.
Teddy chewed his lower lip, unsure of what to say. Rationally he knew Harry was going to understand – he always did – but… what if this time was different? What if he would think it was stupid?
“Have you… have you ever thought about living in Godric’s Hollow?” he asked, wishing it could be enough to make him understand.
Harry looked perplexed, and Teddy’s hope that his Godfather might get to the heart of the problem by his own vanished in an instant
“Well…” said Harry, “I actually lived there for a bit, after Hogwarts, in the small house Sirius bought with his uncle Alphard’s money… I thought you remembered… You came by many times with your gran…”
Teddy swallowed, and his gaze fell upon the Marauders’ photo he cherished so much. “Yeah… yeah, I remember, but… What I meant was… have you ever thought of living at your parents’ house? You know, the one where… where Voldemort…”
“Oh,” murmured Harry, finally getting the problem. “Well, I did think about that, at the beginning,” said Harry. “But… you do remember what the house looks like, right?”
Teddy nodded. It wasn’t an image so easy to forget, but he had been glad that Harry had chosen to take him there the year before, after the memorial for the tenth anniversary of the Battle. It had been nice knowing that Harry was willing to share something like that with him.
“Why didn't you fix it?” Teddy had already wondered about it when he had seen the state of the cottage, but he hadn’t dared to ask, fearing Harry would regret bringing him there.
“Because… well, I don’t know for sure, but it’s like… it’s like that house is the symbol of my parents’ sacrifice, somehow. Like… some sort of memorial, in a way. It didn’t feel tight to fix it, as nothing ever happened. But… maybe I was wrong. Maybe they would have liked it if I'd lived there, where I was born. After all, it’s the only place where we lived together, to my knowledge.”
Teddy liked that too, about Harry – that when they spoke about this stuff he didn’t act like he knew everything and Teddy knew nothing.
Silence fell, and Teddy let his gaze lay upon his father’s young features. He seemed very happy at his friends’ side.
After a while Teddy threw a glance at Harry, and saw that he was staring at the picture as well.
“How do you know?” Teddy asked in a low voice.
Harry turned his head toward him, taken aback. “Know what?”
“What your parents would want.”
Harry closed his eyes for a moment, taking a deep breath. “I know that… that sometimes, when we have to make an important choice, we wonder what would make them the proudest and what would please them the most, and that’s ok, but the truth is… we can only imagine the answer. And anyway, the answer doesn’t really matter, you know? We have to make the choices we feel right, not the choices we think they might feel right.”
Teddy wasn’t sure he fully grasped that concept, but it was true that from time to time – like that morning – he did things to make his parents happy, because he wanted to believe they kept an eye on him, and he didn’t want to disappoint them.
“You don’t think they wouldn’t like it if… if I’m happy where… you know…”
Teddy lowered his gaze, incapable to say it aloud, and only when Harry laid a gentle hand on his shoulder he found the will to raise his head again, looking his godfather in the eyes.
“What I know for certain,” said Harry, “is that our parents died so we could live. Nothing would make them more glad than to see us happy, even at Hogwarts or Godric’s Hollow. Especially at Hogwarts or Godric’s Hollow.”
There was truth in those words, Teddy was aware of it. And yet…
“I… I’m not sure I can do it.”
“Well… you can’t be sure until you try,” said Harry with a kind smile. “And… maybe at the beginning it will be a bit harder for you, I won’t lie about that, but I believe everything’s going to be fine, eventually.”
Teddy would have loved to be infected by his smile, but his lips didn’t cooperate. “What if it won’t?” he murmured.
Harry gave his knee a gentle squeeze. “Then you could write to me or your gran or Ginny, or you could speak to Neville, and we’ll do our best to help you.”
“You think they’d understand too?”
“Yes, I really think they would,” said Harry with no hesitation. “Your gran… well, she’s your grandmother, and I’m sure she misses your mum as much as you do. And Ginny went back to Hogwarts for her last year, even if just a couple of months before she’d lost her brother Fred in the Battle.”
“Oh… I forgot.”
To his surprise, Harry grinned. “You should be really glad she can’t hear you right now, you know? The last time I told her that I forgot something as important, she glared at me and said lucky you,” mimicked Harry with an annoyed tone.
Teddy chuckled, and Harry playfully nudged him in the belly. “Don’t worry, my lips are sealed. But I bet that now you are regretting talking to me rather than Ginny,” Harry joked.
Teddy couldn’t help but smile. “Nah” he said, nudging him back. “You’re not too bad yourself.”
When Harry pulled him in a hug, Teddy held him tight as well.
Harry let go first, throwing a glance at his old watch.
“It’s almost time to go,” he said, taking Teddy by the shoulders and looking him right into the eyes. “I’d like to give you something before we leave, but if you prefer to talk a bit with Ginny I can ask her to join you here.”
Teddy was taken aback by Harry’s word. On one hand, he would really like to hear Ginny’s advice, but on the other he was eager to know what Harry wanted to give him, and if he had to pick between those two…
“Maybe… maybe I could talk to her while we go to the station, or… or I could write…”
Harry chuckled, amused. “Yeah, I’m sure she’ll be happy to hear from you,” he said, ruffling his hair. A moment later he put a hand in his pocket and pulled out an old yellow parchment folded in four.
“Is it a letter?” Teddy asked hopeful. Maybe his parents had written him something for the occasion?
“No, it’s not a letter.”
“Oh.” Teddy was a bit disappointed, but tried not to show it. It had been a silly thought, because he knew his parents had heard about the battle at the very last minute… of course they hadn’t had time to write him something.
“What is it, then?”
“Do you remember when I told you about the Marauders?”
“Of course!” said Teddy with renewed enthusiasm, looking at the parchment with even more curiosity. He had never forgotten the day Harry brought him in the very same room to show him that photo and to share the Marauders’ story, nor he had forgotten when they went in the Shrieking Shack the year before.
Maybe there were other pictures inside the parchment? Harry had always told him the only photograph of the four Marauders he knew of was the one in front of them, and not even Hermione had managed to detach it from the wall, but maybe they had found another one?
“Well… actually, there’s a thing about them I haven’t told you yet,” said Harry with a warm smile. “But you must promise me it’s going to be a secret between us, at least until James will be at Hogwarts too,” he added with a wink.
“I promise!” said Teddy immediately.
“See, this parchment is way more than it seems… something very useful and valuable.”
Teddy watched eagerly while Harry unfolded it and tapped it with his wand.
“I solemnly swear that I’m up to no good.”