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DAY ONE
Coming out of my cage and I’ve been doing just fine…
“Merlin Snow, are you trying to wake the Queen?” I sneer, dramatically throwing my arm over my eyes to block against the golden sunlight streaming through our (thankfully closed) window. Cold, December air, permeates sharp and crisp in the air.
When there’s no reply, I squint open an eye against the golden, morning sun. There’s no one in our room.
I drag myself out of my not-so-warm bed and over to Simon’s phone which is now obnoxiously barrelling through Mr. Brightside’s chorus. It’s not a bad song, but it’s not how I’d ideally start winter break, either. I experimentally hit skip, partly to see if a more appropriate song comes on, and partly because I’m interested in judging Simon’s music taste.
Bela Lugosi’s Dead comes on. I sneer at his phone and toss it back down onto his bed in favor of stalking into the shower.
Figures.
-
Simon’s been visibly ansty all day, sending me nervous glances, and honestly, if anyone were to so much touch me right now, I’d jump ten meters into the air and possibly dent the ceiling.
He’s been following me around, too. It’s like fifth year all over again, except I’m not sure what he wants this time around. Bunce doesn’t seem too inclined to help him with whatever he’s planning as the only thing I’ve caught from their conversations was a loud “Nicks and Slick, Simon. That’s a terrible idea” during lunch today.
However, whatever the Terrible Idea in question was, I have no idea.
I figured I’d go hide in the library for a few hours to escape his incisive stalking. If anything, it seems to have motivated him more than anything. Now, he’s sat in an armchair near the entrance of the library so I’d have to pass him if I wanted to leave.
He’d been hiding behind a large, leather bound book, but he appeared to have grown bored as he’d now been tapping his wand against the edge of the book to what suspiciously sounds like Take On Me.
I figure I have no choice but to pass by the absolute nightmare that is Simon Snow so I quietly close the book I’d been going through, set it back on the shelf, and attempt to walk silently past him.
“Baz,” he gasps out, shutting his own book with a muffled thump, characteristic of hardcover books. I cringe internally, hoping he hasn’t garnered any attention from anyone around us. I doubt it. The only person I could imagine being in here is the librarian and Bunce, but where Snow goes, Bunce goes, so that’s out of the question, and I’m 99 percent sure Madame Princey is at lunch.
I consider taking a running start, break through the window, and fall down three stories to the courtyard.
Unfortunately, I have a remaining shred of dignity in me so I cross my arms and turn towards him, raising an eyebrow that I hope is making him as uncomfortable as he’s making me.
“Yes, Snow?”
He chews the inside of his mouth as his wand tapping becomes more erratic.
“I don’t speak morse code, spit it out-”
“Truth is the daughter of time! What are you hiding?” he barrels out faster than I can do anything.
I blink blankly at him. Was that his great plot? Honestly, of all the truth spells, and he decides to go with a long-term one without a time limit. What a numpty. A numpty I’d very much like to snog.
I raise an eyebrow and stalk out of the library. He’s a fool to think I’d give up my secrets that easily. I’d wait forever before I’d admit anything to him.
I go back to our room and collapse back into bed, turning on Mr. Brightside. There’s a certain circularity in letting it put me to sleep.
-
DAY TWO
Coming out of my cage and I’ve been doing just fine…
“Is this the only song you have in your playlist?” I sneer, rolling over in bed and tossing my blankets off. I immediately regret it as the chilly morning air hit me, but there’s things to be done.
I’ve already decided I’m not visiting my family for Christmas this year as Daphne’s recently given birth to twins, Malcolm’s been losing his mind over them, and Mordelia’s currently staying with Fiona until things slow down with the aforementioned Daphne and Malcolm situation to the point where she wouldn’t be considered neglected.
In the end, I’d told them I’d visit for New Year’s and we’d all silently agreed to push Christmas back to New Year’s.
Besides that, staying over the hols gives me a chance to catch up to Bunce again. Being kidnapped by numpties set me at a major academic disadvantage and I’d be damned if I sat back and let Bunce upstage me. It’s part of the reason why I picked the library to hide in yesterday. I managed to get through a week’s worth of Greek. Though, no doubt Bunce is a month ahead of the curriculum.
A lack of response prompts me to open my eyes. Simon isn’t here again. He finally gets a chance to sleep in and he squanders it.
Mr. Brightside goes into the chorus just as I skip it again. Bela Lugosi’s Dead comes on. I pause. Strange. Maybe he doesn’t have shuffle off. Except, he does.
I hit skip again and Sweet Dreams (Are Made of This) comes on.
Adequate.
I frown and go into our bathroom to shower.
-
He’s acting strangely again.
I wonder if this a daily thing now, Twelve days of Christmas style. Except, it’s the 19th so, six days of Christmas? Or perhaps I wasn’t privy to the other six.
Whatever the fact of the matter may be, he’s conspiring with Bunce again, who’s still at
Watford for whatever reason. With her Weasley-sized family, I would’ve thought her long gone. I pull on my headphones because I have no one to talk to as Dev and Niall have decided not to come down to lunch early once more.
These Things Take Time by The Smiths comes on and I stand up, leaving and making a beeline for the library where I’m planning on spending the rest of the day catching up with Political Science, hopefully Snow-free.
I should really start lowering my expectations.
-
He’s hiding behind the same ridiculous book once more, sat in the armchair near the entrance, and I’m growing quite tired of it.
I decide I’m going to make him wait today. I’m not looking forward to having any more truth spells erratically placed on me, thank you very much.
I know for a fact he’s planning something. He looks extremely shifty and has his wand on him, which means he’s ready to try some magic that will inevitably go awry and leave us all generally worse off and leave everything smelling vaguely of smoke.
Three hours in and I’m really regretting skipping dinner. Though I fed, Bela Lugosi wise, two days ago, I’m not feeling hungry on that front. Strange.
I’m just about to give up waiting on Simon when he suddenly seems to grow tired of waiting for me and he’s suddenly got his jaw jutted out and he’s striding between bookshelves towards me, book and wand clasped in his hands looking to the world like a man on a mission.
“Baz.”
I raise an eyebrow. “Back to cast more spells, are we? What’s your plot today?”
He frowns, poking his hand into my chest. “What are you doing?”
I try to look amused, “no spells this time? Honesty approach?”
He growls, frustrated, “why are you so secretive?”
“I could ask you the same thing as you’re failing to spill all the intricate details of your clearly well planned out plot.”
“No- God, you’re always there,” he growls, passing his fingers through his hair. I want to tell him to stop; It always messed up his curls.
“We’re roommates.”
“No, I mean,” he growls again and points his wand at me, “truth is the daughter of time!”
I raise an unimpressed eyebrow. “Again?”
He frowns, “again?”
I nod as if he’s being particularly dense, which he is, “again. You used this one yesterday.”
“Yesterday?”
I roll my eyes, legitimately exasperated, “yes Snow. Yesterday. You used this same spell yesterday. You know. The day before today.”
He widened his eyes. “W-what? It worked?”
I feel a chill settle itself within me, as if I’d swallowed an ice cube.
Merlin, of course it worked. It couldn’t have worked. It shouldn’t have worked. I pull out my phone, hands shaking.
December 19th.
Merlin, fuck me.
-
DAY THREE
Coming out of my cage and I’ve been doing just fine…
I only get to feel the warmth of the golden, winter sun before it all comes crashing down upon me, as if a dementor has decided to inhibit my body.
I’m stuck in a bloody time loop.
Worst of all, if I ever wish to escape it, I’d have to confess everything to Simon, from my being a Vampire, to being in love with him.
Crowley, I’m living a charmed life.
It’s still cold as Merlin’s tits as I drag myself out of bed to Simon’s phone. I pause Mr. Brightside just as Brandon Flowers goes into the chorus and take a wild stab at Simon’s password.
Wrong. Of course. No hopes of actually looking at his full Spotify library. I turn his music back on and skip. Bela Lugosi. I thumb moves faster than it’s ever done in my life as I hit skip. Sweet Dreams. Skip. Take On Me. I pause. A song a day. Interesting.
If I’m to be stuck in some demented time loop. I may as well make the most of it. Especially since I don’t have classes or any construct of time to hold me to my actions and make me pay the consequences.
You know, the usual things teenaged, wizard vampires have to deal with.
-
When I got down to breakfast, I opened the hall doors with an Open Sesame, just because I can, and no one will remember tomorrow.
Simon looks as antsy as ever, even as he shovels scones into his mouth, and Penelope looks as disgusted as ever. They seem to be going over Simon’s stellar plan.
I hold back a smirk, pressing my lips together instead to look pensive as I pour myself some Earl Grey. Simon catches eyes with me across the hall. he freezes. I raise an amused eyebrow. He turns back to Bunce, looking troubled as he passes his fingers through his hair.
I frown. He’s going to mess up his curls.
Dev and Niall aren’t here today, either. Well, today was yesterday after all.
Merlin, this is confusing.
I finish off my tea and stand up, determined to find Dev and Niall.
-
“I’m gay,” I say, as a greeting as Niall’s freckled face greets me, half hidden behind the door.
He looks mildly confused. “Uh, hold up,” he turns towards the inside of his room and calls out for Dev.
“Yeah?” Dev shouts back.
“You owe me your album!”
I blink, blankly, “you bet on me.”
Dev materializes next to Niall, “well, Niall bet on you. I thought you were ace, he said you were gay.”
I blink again, “you bet on my sexuality?”
Niall has the decency to look sheepish. Dev looks as if he could care less.
“I really wanted Dev’s Origin of Symmetry vinyl,” Niall says as an explanation
“You bet on my sexuality over an album?” I repeat, indignant. Honestly, Muse? Over a Muse album? I’d be the first to admit, Origin of Symmetry is a masterpiece, but over an album.
“Well, we don’t care, if that’s what you’re wondering. We’d started to think you’d come out at Oxford. I half thought you had a thing for Niall before I realized it was for Snow,” Dev says, casually.
I nearly choke and cough violently. Niall pats my back, though it’s not really doing much. I’ve always wondered why people do that.
We’re speaking about my sexuality casually. We’re discussing my thing for Snow. I suppose this is my life now. It’s good practice, anyway, for when I inevitably confess everything to Simon.
Merlin, at worst I was expecting both of them to be homophobic twats, but they’re so nonchalant and even supportive about it all that it’s a bit off-putting.
I need to get out of here.
-
“You’re up to something.”
“Am I now?” I ask Simon as we walk into the library together.
Well, initially we were separated by a ten meter radius, but Simon’s lack of comprehension of personal space now finds us shoulder to shoulder as we walk into the library. Well, I’m striding, and Simon’s struggling to catch up with my legs.
“Yes, you are. You always are. You did this, didn’t you.”
I pause, just as we reach my usual spot in the library near a large window and set down my books. I love the way his hair looks set aflame in this lighting. It’s taking every ounce of self-control in me not to brush a stray hair away from his eyes.
“Did what, Snow?” I drawl, seemingly bored. I genuinely have no idea what he’s on about. He’s been troubled for the past three days, but I haven’t bothered to ask why, truly. Well, throwing caution to the wind, I ask.
“Why are you like this?” I ask him, which in retrospect, is not the best way to phrase ‘are you okay?’
He looks taken aback. “What? Like what?”
I gesture vaguely with my hand at him, “like this, troubled.”
He brings his thumb up to his mouth to chew on it. “Why do you care?”
I roll my eyes, “misdirection, I asked first.”
He seems to consider his words before speaking. “I broke up with Aggie.”
It takes everything in me not to let out an exaggerated exhale.
“I’m so sorry,” I say, sarcastically. “I’ll be sure to attend the make up party in two weeks.”
“That’s the thing,” he says, tapping out Take On Me with his wand on the desk I’ve set my books down on, “there’s not gonna be a make up.”
“Oh?”
“She doesn’t want me. She’s asexual.”
I bristle, “you shouldn’t go around outting people, Snow,” I reprimand.
He looks startled, even offended, “she said she didn’t mind if I told Penny, or people in general. I’m not an asshole, Baz,” he growls.
“Fine,” I concede, taking the bait, “what does this have to do with you looking like something crawled up your arse?”
He ignores my phrasing and seems to be weighing his words again as he pulls a chair out and sits in it. I take the one next to his. “It got me thinking, about sexuality and all that stuff, and it’s just, uh,” he pauses, looking me in the eyes, “I think I’m bisexual,” he says, a bit loudly. He looks sheepish and looks away almost immediately, passing his fingers through his hair.
“Stop that,” I say, watching his curls get tugged.
His eyes shoot up to meet mine, “what?”
“Your hair, you’ll mess up your curls,” I explain. He lets out a little, oh in relief, I think.
I consider my words. I suppose I’m not the only one coming out today. One more person won’t hurt.
“It’s alright, you know that, right?” I may be an asshole, but I’m not homophobic, nor a hypocrite (to an extend anyway, Merlin knows I sweep salt and vinegar crisps behind my bed but reprimand Simon for leaving Aero bars wrappers around.)
“I, yeah- I mean, yeah,” he says, awkwardly. I can physically feel there’s something he’s leaving out.
“Merlin, Snow, spit it out, you’ll strangle yourself trying to hold yourself back. You’ve never not spoken your mind before. Why start now?” I pause, consider stopping, but continue. “Merlin knows I won’t judge you, I’m gay.”
I physically feel the words hang tangibly in the air. Every second feels like hours as Simon studies my face. I wish I knew what he was thinking.
“It was you,” he says.
“What?”
“You. You’re always just there. You made me realize I was, you know. Bisexual.”
I blink at him, wondering if this is some sort of fever dream, a side product of being stuck in a time loop. Merlin.
For once in my mind I don’t think. I place my hand on his cheek and take a chance.
-
DAY FOUR
Coming out of my cage and I’ve been doing just fine…
No. Absolutely not.
I spell my covers off of me and storm over to where Simon’s phone is making its way through Mr. Brightside for the nth time. I’m fairly certain it’s the fourth.
It’s all gone away. It’s been erased.
I wrack my brain trying to figure out where I went wrong. After I kissed Simon in the library, we went back to our room. We stopped snogging soon after in favor of lying together and holding hands.
And now it’s all gone.
I frantically skip through his songs. They’re the same songs. In the same order. Sweet Dreams. Skip. Take On Me. Skip. What Difference Does It Make? by The Smiths comes on and I consider slamming my head against our bloody window and throwing myself to the merwolves because Morrissey’s so right.
What difference does it make?
All my progress is gone. I came out to Dev and Niall. I kissed Simon. I brushed my fingers through Simon’s hair as we snogged.
I never told him I loved him. I never told him I was a vampire. I’m an idiot.
I take the fastest shower of my life and rush down the stairs of Mummer’s house towards the dining hall.
I have to tell him.
He likes me. He told me so. I caused his gay awakening. That has to mean something.
I cast an Open Sesame on the doors and storm over to where Simon is conversing with Penelope.
“Simon,” I start, not quite sure where to go from here, “do you want to know?”
He frowns. I suppose my question has the possibility of coming off a bit vague and ominous.
“I’ll tell you. Follow me. I’ll tell you everything.”
He shoots a glance at Bunce. She narrowed her eyes at me. I narrow mine right back. “He’s going to follow me anyway,” I tell Bunce, not at all suspiciously or ominously. I turn back to Simon who’s now standing, looking as antsy as ever, “follow me, I’ll explain.”
-
Apparently explaining means shoving him into an alcove in the back of the library and snogging him senseless.
He shoves me off, understandably, though I swore he kissed me back for a moment.
He’s breathing heavily, looking at me cautiously, his jaw jutted out for a challenge. I can’t help but notice how his lips have gone a bit reddish. He looks as thoroughly snogged as someone who was only snogged for three seconds can look.
“What are you doing?” he asks me.
I have to get him to trust me before anything, I ignore his question and launch into standard book exposition.
“You were planning on casting truth is the daughter of time, yeah?”
He looks startled by the subject change, and narrows his eyes at me, leaning further back into the alcove. Merlin, his hair looks good in sunlight. He looks good in sunlight. It makes him absolutely radiant. It’s fitting.
He’s the Sun, and I’m crashing into him.
“You were planning on following me after lunch to cast it, yeah?”
He nods once more, warily. I watch the realization crash into him.
“It worked,” he breathes out.
I nod, “yeah, it worked.” I don’t even know where to start. “Merlin this is insane.”
He nods, “yeah,” he seems to consider, “why did you snog me?” he asks.
I feel a wave of fear wash over me. I have to tell him. “I’m a vampire.” Wait, no.
He recoils, “you snogged me because you’re a vampire?” There’s apprehension written clearly on his face. But I don’t think he’s afraid of me. He hasn’t run away yet, so that’s something.
“Wait, that’s not the right order,” I say trying to organize my thoughts, compartmentalize as my heart threatens to beat out of my chest, filled with nothing but pure Gryffindor courage I didn’t even know I had.
He frowns, “there’s an order?”
“Well, not really. I think the easiest way to start would be with a simple ‘I’m gay’, or any variation of that.”
He blinks blankly, taking in what I’ve said.
“You’re gay?”
I nod, hoping I’m reading this correctly, “and you’re bisexual. You think. Because of me. Well, not because of me. Well, I like to think it’s because of me,” I’m rambling, but I’ve started, so I may as well finish, “you see, I love you, and this all probably seems a bit out of nowhere, but-”
“Baz,” Simon cuts me off. I close my mouth abruptly, “shut up.”
And then he kisses me.
I really can’t find any reason to argue with that logic so I curl my fingers through the hair at the base of his neck and kiss him back.
-
DAY FIVE
Coming out of my cage and I’ve been doing just fine…
I nearly jump out of my skin as I hear the riff kick off with its tantalizing notes.
“Fuck no! fuck off!” I shout at Simon’s phone as I climb over him to skip Mr. Brightside.
“Baz?” Simon groans, concern laced in his voice as Everybody Wants To Rule the World by Tears For Fears comes on. I nod, satisfied and lay back down in bed, still a bit paranoid that Simon is going to declare this all some elaborate joke and feed me to the merewolves.
My fears are abruptly squashed as Simon tucks his head between my head and shoulders and presses a soft kiss to my neck.
“Baz,” he says my name now as if it means more than just Baz, and I don’t think I’ll ever be over it, “go back to bed.”
He intertwined our legs and throws his arm over my middle and any retorts die on my tongue.
He sighs contently and I close my eyes, making no attempts to hide the grin on my face.
Time can wait.