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This was never supposed to happen.
Of all her carefully laid out plans, of her lies and promises fated to breath; developing feelings for a student from another house wasn’t one of them.
It began innocently at first, a chance meeting in the dead of night. Nightmares again but Mercedes had offered her shelter from the collapsing storm of darkness; they drank tea and spoke of petty little things until neither could keep their eyes open.
Then came the lunches, sweets packed into a little boxes to eat on the road to her next battle. It was an odd kindness, but not unwelcome. After a while, Mercedes could be found waiting at the gates of Garreg Mach for the Black Eagles to return; she would offer healing to any of them, but she always asked Edelgard first.
Touches came next. Soft and fleeting like a morning breeze; Mercede’s hands would graze hers as they walked together, when her hand would find Edelgard’s shoulder when she needed to hold herself still as laughs rolled through her shoulders and even the soft farewell kisses to her cheek. “It’s a tradition!” She would say with cheer, but Edelgard knew lie before it left her lips; she let her new friend have it, a deep satisfaction squirming in her gut when she returned the gesture.
When Byleth, the Professor of the Black Eagles proved to be a prodigy of Faith magic, Mercedes was the first to request to join.
Now in the same class; nights were spent together, homework and idle chatting, wasting the nights away. The touches lasted longer, stolen moments in time when hands found each other under a table.
When the night of the ball came, Edelgard guided Mercedes to the Goddess’s Tower; she told her the story of her parents, of how they met and fell in love at first sight. “Oh, that’s a beautiful story Edie.” Mercede’s voice whispered, “Do you believe in the legend too?” There was an odd edge in her voice as she asked. Edelgard pressed a finger to her own lips, “It would be a nice thing to believe in. That prayers whispered here would be heard, but we are better off making our own miracles happen. Do you not agree?”
Their hands linked together, fingers interwoven as Mercerdes laughed, soft and sweet, “Nobles like you rarely get to choose who they can make vows to, but they still come here all the same.” Edelgard felt her traitorous heart stutter as she met Mercede’s gaze, her body following the commands of a greater master than her ambition; she pulled on Mercede’s shawl, kissing her for the first time.
“I cannot promise forever, but would a ’for now’ suffice?”
--
The dust in the Holy Tomb filled her lungs as she revealed the truth; the righteous fury in the Archbishops voice as she commanded her fellow Eagles to strike their leader down. Only one of her allies would meet her gaze, even as her heart broke into a thousand pieces at her feet.
“Is it true, Edie? You’re the one responsible for all those horrible things?” The accusation at the tip of Mercede’s tongue didn’t need to be said but they wounded Edelgard regardless. Cold and callous, the words escaped her, “I had promised you for now, did I not? This is the end for us. I’m sorry Mercedes, what we had wasn't real.” She watched the expression change on her lover’s face, shock and upset lasted only for a moment before an oddly determined glint found her eyes.
It was the same look she got whenever she had worked out Edelgard had lied about why she was late to lunch, or why she was wandering the academy grounds after curfew; but there was no soft reconfirmation of her support, just a hard stare.
The battle was a long one, and one she was destined to lose. Byleth’s mind seemed to know Edelgard’s tactics better than she did; nothing she commanded went without a counter and at the end, the only thing she had was a single grateful thought that Byleth had not sent Mercedes to die on her axe.
“Professor, kill Edelgard.”
Clutching fresh wounds, Edelgard waited for Hubert to teleport to her side; alone she would be unable to escape but thankfully she had foreseen this unfortunate possibility. Then, something else happened.
Hubert did arrive at her side, but so too did Mercedes; whispering her soft prayers as her hands found each wound Edelgard had taken in that battle. She had been watching, counting. Standing before her, sword drawn but pointed at the Archbishop was her Professor.
“I must protect Edelgard.”
The rest of the Black Eagles quickly gathered to her side, each one of them choosing her. As Rhea began her descent into madness, a soft voice pressed itself into Edelgard’s chest; the armor of the Flame Emperor making her taller than the woman at her side, “I can tell saying what you said upset you. You were lying to me, Edie. So… I’m staying by your side until you tell me the truth.”
The Immaculate One soon gifted all present with her true face and every Eagle took wing, fleeing the Monastery with resolve in their hearts.
“Do you hate the Goddess, Edie?” Mercedes sat next to Edelgard as they waited for news that the bulk of the Imperial Army had reached their destination. The Emperor shook her head, “I dislike when people believe their faith will hand them everything they ask for, but I dislike the same of the nobility when they flaunt their position.” She danced around the question again, but she didn’t need such subterfuge any longer, “No, Mercie. I don’t hate the Goddess. My war is only against the prophet that uses the Goddess to control humanity.” She was expecting a long silence or more questions, instead Mercedes lifted their joined hands to her lips and pressed a kiss to her Emperor’s fingers, “I think the Goddess feels the same. She brought me to you and I believe in you.” Edelgard could only smile.
And Mercedes stayed by her side, even when their Professor vanished and the war began in earnest.
--
“There is something on your mind, Edie. You know I’m always willing to listen.”
Mercedes felt her Emperor huff a breath against her neck, her attention wasn’t unusual in private but even after these years, Edelgard avoided the Infirmary when she could. The fact she was here, gloved hands trailing up and down her lover’s arms spoke more than words did.
“Do you remember what happened in the Holy Tomb?” Edelgard’s voice rumbled low, quiet and controlled as she pulled away, “I wanted to explain myself. To tell you the truth-” Her voice vanished as Mercedes pressed a kiss to her lips.
“I remember, and do you remember what I said in return?” A smile graced her as she watched realization dance in lavender eyes, “I wish to be by your side until the end, Edie. So, save your words for then, okay?”
Edelgard never got that chance to explain herself, but Mercedes didn’t need to be told. She knew it in the shape of her Emperor’s love; and that was enough for her.
No forevers, just until the end, for now.