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Black. Maybe some red? That's all he saw. He couldn't tell, he didn't care.
He heard yelling, screaming, somebody crying?
It didn't matter to him.
He couldn't—
'Breathe.'
He felt his chest grow tight, or had it? He couldn't feel a thing.
But everything hurt at the very same time, it felt strange. He felt alienated, where was he before this? Why couldn't he feel yet, felt so much at once?
He felt emotional, embarrassed, happy, depressed and numb, all at once.
He hated it, he felt like he needed to run away.
'You need to breathe, Tomioka.'
The voice sounded familiar, annoyingly so, but he was breathing. Wasn't he?
Panic settled in. He felt like he was drowning and burning at the same time.
Was he.. Dying?
He hadn't thought that this would be what it's like.
Maybe he hoped it would of been more peaceful.
He could let himself go, he didn't have any reason to hold onto this life. He could be reborn anew, somebody or something better.
Maybe he'd be able to see Sabito again.
'Tomioka, can you hear me?'
He felt like an idiot, was it selfish to want to join Sabito?
"Ah."
The memories came flooding back, it really was the ‘your life flashing before your eyes’ scenario.
☆
Don't say that you'd be better off dying ever again.
If you do, you and I are done.
We'll stop being friends.
Your sister was supposed to get married the next day. And despite knowing that, she hid you from the demons and protected you.
You have nobody else…? That's an insult to your sister.
You can't die, ever.
That life she lost to protect you? That future she left for you?
They're still with you, Giyuu.
☆
He truly was scum, wasn't he?
How selfish, but for Sabito and his sister.. He'll keep living, and join them when the time's right.
It was pitiful, really, he could almost smile— He was almost excited to see the other pillars, the demon slayers.
Maybe he'd visit Sabito’s grave when he's mostly healed, he owed the peach-head a visit.
~~
He woke up, in the butterfly estate? He wasn't sure, he hoped so at least.
“Tomioka! You're awake! Truly upsetting, I was hoping you wouldn't wake for at least a few more days.”
He let out a silent laugh, she seemed surprised at this.
“Oh..? Did you hit your head that hard?”
She smiled genuinely, or he hoped so anyways, he lazily returned it.
“Shinobu… Thank you for taking care of me…”
His voice cracked a little, how embarrassing.
She stifled a giggle, “It's no problem, Tomioka.” she paused and set a small tray onto his lap “Eat up, then rest more.”
She paused again.
“I'm sure you'll need the energy.” Then she left, smiling to herself.
She was truly terrifying at times.