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Dib stared at the graffiti on the restroom door that read “hi-skool sux” in angry carved letters, and he couldn’t agree more. Skool had sucked, he’d been labeled the weirdo, the outcast, but he and Zim had been on the same level. Now as a senior in hi-skool, he’d spent the last three years fending for himself. It was lonely. It seemed like a miracle when Zim made friends freshman year and Dib, without even Gaz, was by himself. Even when she’d promoted to hi-skool, she’d already befriended people. She didn’t need him. No one here needed him. So here he was in the school restroom, in the furthest stall back, reading a book. He was aware how revolting the skool restrooms were but the last time he’d eaten in the cafeteria his favorite copy of The Amityville Horror was drenched in chocolate milk from a passing student.
It was all Zim’s fault. All his fault for leaving Dib behind. Stupid Zim.
The lunch bell made its usual shrill screech jolting Dib back into reality. He scrambled to his feet and left the restroom, hoping to beat the crowd coming in from lunch. No such luck. Not for him. A few people pushed past him into the restroom while he stood there waiting for the wave of his peers to dwindle. He looked up at the blinding florescent lights attempting to ground himself in the noisy hallway.
“Dib.” a voice muttered next to him. It was Gaz. “Did you seriously hide out in the restroom again?” She tugged his sleeve, forcing him to follow his sister to her next class.
“Don’t tell D-”
“Of course I’m telling Dad, Dib! I mean didn’t you talk to Maryanne about this?”
He flinched at the mention of his therapist. “Yeah, we talked about it, but it’s not like it matters. There are only three months of school left anyway.” Truth be told he hadn’t told his therapist anything over the last two months. Most sessions Dib sat there defiantly while Maryanne tried prying any information out of the seventeen-year-old. He’d promised himself that once he turned eighteen, he wouldn’t see her ever again.
Gaz rolled her eyes before going into her class. He was alone again.
Dib shuffled to the library. He’d managed to nab a spot as an assistant to Ms. Page, a soft-spoken blonde librarian that loved heavy metal. She was nice enough. The other assistant, Emery, had taken her GED before spring break and passed, which meant that a new assistant was needed to replace her. After eight months of working with the ginger-haired senior Dib had come to admire her bubbly disposition, even if they only ever partook in small talk while working together. He opened the door of the library to see Ms. Page at her desk.
She smiled kindly at him. “Dib Membrane! How was your spring break?”
“It was fine.” He looked around. “Did you find someone to replace Emery?” He walked over to the side office and placed his bag in the far corner by the mini-fridge.
“Why, yes, I did! But you’ll have to excuse me. Apparently, there’s a stack of late books people dropped off over break in the office. Can you give the newbie the tour?” She rushed out, heels clicking against the tile floors.
Dib stood awkwardly in the office doorway until he decided to read his book while waiting. The bell signaling the beginning of the period rang, meaning that the new assistant was late on his first day. Footsteps echoed in the hall before the door slammed open, and a familiar voice yelled.
“I’m late! I, Zim, apologizes for this, Librarian Page!” Dib whirled around nearly falling off the couch. Zim was standing at the library entrance, eyes wide with fear.
Feelings of red-hot anger burned within the human at the sight of the alien, until a numbness took over. “Z-Zim?”
“Dib? What are you doing here?”
“I’m Ms. Page’s assistant.”
“Oh.”
“Yeah.” Dib frowned, getting up from the couch. “I’ll give you the ‘tour,’ I guess.” He waved the alien along. “It’s empty today, but as soon as teachers assign essays, the computer lab will fill up. We help students print and sometimes just look over papers if we get asked.” He gestured to the computer lab that held about twenty dumpy computers hooked up to a clunky printer. Zim made no noised behind him besides the shuffling of his boots on the carpet. “Other times we just shelve books or clean the computers. If there’s nothing to do, then we can do whatever. And then, the office. There are snacks I there, and it's off-limits to anyone but Ms. Page and the assistants.” He walked away from Zim and sat back down on the couch, avoiding eye contact with his former… friend? Enemy?
“Where do-”
“Just ask Ms. Page and leave me alone.” Dib scowled. His head buzzed as thoughts raced. Why Zim? Why did it have to be him? He glanced up from his book at Zim, who was standing in the office, staring blankly out the tinted windows. Over the years he’d grown maybe a couple of inches and started wearing more high-heeled shoes, making him look about five feet instead. Dib would joke before that he was going to be the alien Danny Devito if he never grew. The Irken uniform had been exchanged for modern clothes that covered his green skin. The alien turned around meeting Dib’s eyes. “Zim.”
“What?” Zim asked hesitantly.
“Anyone find out you’re an alien? Try to dissect you?”
“Zim isn’t doing this with you, Dib.” He glared. “I don’t need to bring myself back to that feral behavior.”
“So, I won?”
“Shut up, filth,” Zim growled. “Stop it, Dib.”
A piece of Dib shrank back, but part of him hoped that by pressing Zim things would shift back to the way they were when things made sense. “People don’t care about the green skin or the robot ‘dog’ anymore or-”
The office door slammed closed.
Dib slouched on the into the corner of the couch resisting the urge to throw his book or scream or do anything that may bring the alien back out. He just wanted it to go back to the way it was. Zim may not have been his friend, but at least he had spoken to Dib regularly. He pulled at a piece of hair behind his ear.
“Back!” Ms. Page sang, dropping the stack of books in her arms onto the desk. “Zim not here yet?”
“Office.” Dib pointed. She flashed him a smile before walking into the office to greet the other student. For the next forty minutes, it stayed like that, Zim and Ms. Page talking in the back while Dib assisted students who wandered in. He’d managed to read a couple of chapters of The Ghosts Among Us before the bell rang. He watched the alien wave goodbye as two of his peers met him in the hall. Zim glanced at the human before leaving with an expression that Dib couldn’t place.
Two months had passed off working with Zim. Small talk was exchanged maybe twice a week. The alien ignored Dib outside of the library, sending him into a crisis over the crippling loneliness. Then it was the Thursday before prom, too many books had been turned in so people could buy their last-minute tickets. The two shelved books in silence until the overwhelming stillness rattled a sentence out of Dib. “Zim?”
“Yes, Dib?” Zim asked, not making eye contact.
“What do I have to do for things to go back to normal?”
“Normal?” He questioned, looking at the human. “What do you mean…normal?”
“Like before hi-skool.” Dib clarified glancing at Zim with a nervous face.
The alien was frozen with a book in his grasp. “There’s nothing you can do, and I don’t want to go back to the way things were before.” He whispered shelving the book. “I don’t hate you, Dib. Zim just won’t do that madness all over again.”
The human slowly nodded before grabbing his bag and walking out of the library, ignoring Zim’s calls from inside. His heart pounded in his chest as he mindlessly wandered the halls. He really was alone. Zim didn’t care. The loneliness was driving him insane, practically eating him alive. Dib looked around to see himself in his usual restroom stall with the door graffiti.
HI-SKOOL SUX!
He punched the door, the gritty texture turning his knuckles raw. The bell rang, and from inside, he could hear students leaving their classes and moving onto the next. Rushing out of the stall, he sprinted through the sea of students towards the front of the skool. His legs carried him home, shaking hands unlocking the front door and slamming it behind him. Dib threw his bag onto his bed; his room hadn’t changed much in the past few years besides the lack of evidence against Zim on his desk and walls. After sophomore year, he’d given up on waiting for Zim to return to his antics and stuffed anything relating to the alien into a box in his closet. He didn’t even know what he’d been attempting in the library. Maybe he just wanted quick banter, or perhaps he wanted Zim to acknowledge his existence for once, even for a little bit.
“Fuck…” He sighed leaning against the poster covered wall of his room. Dib walked over to his closet, pulling out the box of Zim papers. He looked at them, eyes watering and tears eventually falling onto the documents. Drawings, journal entries, diagrams, flash drives, bits, and pieces from his childhood. Maybe Zim hadn’t just been his nemesis, perhaps they had been friends of some sort. Either way, it hurt. It hurt a lot.