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Eddie doesn’t pull back when Richie kisses him, and maybe that helps some, but the fear is still there. Maybe he’s just trying to be polite, because that’s how nice he is. Maybe he’s frozen in fear, that’s probably what it is. And although the smaller boy’s lips feel so nice against his, Richie takes it upon himself to back away. At the very least to see how he’s feeling.
“The flu’s been crazy lately.”
Of all the things he thought Eddie would say, that was not one of them, though he supposes he should’ve expected something along those lines. He tries to not let the hurt show on his face, if this is Eddie’s way of ignoring what happened, it’s better not to push.
But he looks scared.
“I don’t have the flu Eds, unless your mom gave it to me. I wouldn’t be surprised.” The joke falls flat and neither of them are laughing. Richie isn’t even looking at Eddie, but if he was he’d see how nervous he was; shaking, messing with his fingers. “I got my shot.”
“Those things don’t always work, y’know? There’s a new strain every year and the doctors try to predict what it’ll be like, but they don’t always know. What if you have it and you just don’t know yet? Maybe someone else that you kissed gave it to you-” he’s clearly rambling and Richie can’t handle it.
“I haven’t kissed anyone else.” What does Eddie think? He just goes around kissing everyone that passes him by? It’s him, it’s always been him.
“Oh.” If Richie would look up he’d have seen how red the other’s cheeks are. Eddie wants to ask if he’s sure, but he trusts him. Richie wouldn’t lie about something like that because he never lies to him. Even if it hurts. That’s one of the reasons he hangs out with him more solo than any of the losers combined. Why he’s spending time with him right now.
There might be something else too. It’s something he tries desperately to push down and that he hates about himself, and now Richie's making him confront it. And as mad as he is, it’s not at him, it could never be at him.
Richie is the thing Eddie had feared being. And Richie is perfect. So does that make it okay?
He doesn’t dwell on it too long, as he’s already leaning in for the second kiss.