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“What if I don’t see it?” Steve crossed his arms, chin raised.
Tony had to bite his lip not to react. He’d decided to give talking to Steve one last try, especially since he’d heard that he intended to work for SHIELD. For Peggy’s, for his father’s sake and their relationship with Rogers he would try to talk to him. They needed to at least clear the air so they could work together again because something was coming, he’d seen it on the other side of the wormhole. “You don’t have to believe me or follow my advice, I’m just asking you to listen and to honestly consider what I’m saying.”
Steve looked him over critically. “Very well.”
“First of all, I’d like to apologize for what I said on the Helicarrier. Yeah, the Sceptre egged us on but I’m still sorry.” Tony began, then waited for his reply. He wasn’t very happy with how long he had to wait but refrained from saying anything.
“Okay. I also apologize.”
Well, that’s that taken care of. Now to the harder part. “Like I said, I personally don’t think SHIELD is a good fit for you – or me, or Bruce, for that matter. But more than that, I think that you need more information to make a decision.”
“Why do you think SHIELD isn’t a good fit for me or Doctor Banner?”
“Well, for one, neither Bruce nor I want to work for an organization that was willing to nuke New York.”
“‘Nuke’?” Steve repeated, frowning.
“Right, fuck, you wouldn’t know about that, would you?” Tony shook his head. “Right, you won’t believe me even if I tell you but go look up ‘nuclear bomb’ online or in a library or something. That should give you an idea of the extent of what they were willing to do.”
Steve was still frowning but at least nodded. “I’ll look it up.”
“When you do, you should take the time to learn the basics about what has changed in the last decades and how things work today,” Tony suggested carefully. “Right now, you have no real frame of reference for what SHIELD is telling you. Or what I am telling you,” he hurried to add, seeing his mulish expression. He sighed, deciding to be blunt: “Look, I understand you don’t like me after what SHIELD told you and, frankly, right now you’re also a let-down from the stories Dad and Aunt Peggy told me,” (he ignored Steve’s “Aunt Peggy?”) “but for their sake, I’m asking you to take the time to learn, about SHIELD, about the future and about your options. Go back to the army, go study art or go work for SHIELD after all for all I care but do it because it’s what you want to do, not what’s been sold to you.”
“Fine.”
~*~
Steve had been set to disregard what Stark told him. After the video SHIELD had shown him, he did not think that he was in any way someone to listen to when making decisions. He ignored the inner voice telling him that he also hadn’t considered him able of making the sacrifice play and look what had happened. But then he’d just asked him to learn, for Howard’s sake, for Peggy’s sake. And suddenly he had a far harder time ignoring his words. After all what could it hurt to go to the nearest library learn about what he had missed?
Famous last words.
He was horrified after he learned about nuclear bombs. He’d thought the first account to have been an exaggeration but if anything, all others he had found had been worse. He’d finally asked other if the accounts were true. They were. God, what had they been thinking firing such a bomb at New York? Stark had been right, this way not a decision he approved of.
From there, he’d stumbled more or less chronologically through accounts of what had happened after the war. It was a mixed bag. He’d have thought people would know better now. He’d almost been thrown out of the library for how loud he had got when he learned about the anti-vaccination movement.
But through it all he had found no mention of SHIELD. CIA, FBI; NSA, JAG, he’d come across a number of agencies but never SHIELD. Even when he had specifically started researching agencies, there had been no mention. He’d tried searching for Strategic Homeland Intervention Enforcement and Logistics Division, also nothing. The same for the World Security Council.
Just who were those people trying to recruit him?
He stared at the computer a kind person had taught him to use. He hesitated, then opened a new search mask and typed in ‘Tony Stark’.
~*~
When JARVIS told him that Steve Rogers was in the lobby, asking to see him, Tony’s first reaction was to ask JARVIS if he needed to check his code. But no, on the screen showing the lobby was really Steve Rogers. Tony frowned but he had all too often been told that his curiosity might get him killed one day. He took the lift downstairs.
“Mister- no, Doctor Stark, I owe you an apology,” Rogers started when he saw him. “I judged you on what bad intel I’d been given, instead of your own merits and without giving you a chance. I’m sorry.” He smiled hopefully. “Perhaps we can try again?”
Tony stared at him, completely taken aback. “Yes. I mean, yes, we can try again, without second- or third-hand information and without the Sceptre influencing us.” Jesus, that smile ought to be illegal.
“I got a general idea of what I missed now. Perhaps you have some ideas what I should take a look at?”
Tony slowly returned the smile. “I might have.”