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"Uther Pendragon," Nimueh said. "The choice is yours. Choose, now, on this day, to forfeit the life of your wife or to curse your son for all of eternity."
Uther stared at Nimueh with murder in his eyes. "Monster," he snarled. "How dare you? My wife is in the next room with our son and you trespass upon our happiness?"
Nimueh narrowed her eyes. "We had a bargain, Uther. I have fulfilled my end of it: you have a son. Now it is time for payment. I do not choose the currency, but you must pay it," she said.
"My son will be the next king! And my wife will stand beside me as he grows. That is my answer," Uther snapped.
"Then you choose to curse him," Nimueh said. "It is done."
"No!" Uther shouted even as he was blinded by a flash of light. He heard Arthur begin to wail in the next room. Uther found himself frozen in place, unable to check on his wife and newborn son while still in Nimueh's power. "What have you done?" he asked instead.
"Only what I said would happen. Your son is now cursed. I cannot tell in what manner he will suffer, but it will be harsh. Perhaps he will fall into an eternal sleep on his sixteenth birthday and never wake up. Perhaps he will forever be unable to speak in any tongue of man," Nimueh said, smiling cruelly. "Or, perhaps, he will turn into a bunny whenever he is around his true love," she continued, and then paused and looked puzzled as if she had not meant to say such a thing.
Uther stared at her in speechless horror.
"No matter," Nimueh said, collecting herself. "I take my leave of you and your family, Uther Pendragon. May we never meet again." With a flourish and a bang, she disappeared in a whirl of smoke.
"Bugger," said Uther. Finding his limbs working again, he dashed into the bedroom where Ygraine was nursing Arthur contentedly.
Ygraine looked up at her husband and smiled. "Isn't he perfect?" she said, delight making her more beautiful than Uther ever imagined.
"Yes," Uther said. "Absolutely perfect."
Arthur didn't quite grow up to be perfect, but he was good and strong and somewhat less of a prat because Ygraine was around to scold him half the time and coddle him the other half. Uther kept an eye on both of them, but they remained healthy and quite happy. If Uther strongly discouraged Arthur from forming attachments to any kind of eligible ladies, nay, even discouraged any kind of introduction to said ladies (Morgana was an exception; she and Arthur fought like cats and dogs, although not in a literal sense, to Uther's relief), he was just doing his part to ensure the prince remained an eligible heir to the throne, and not something with two long ears and fur, of course. Constant vigilance.
Arthur was an active boy who enjoyed both swordfighting and hunting. He never hunted hare, though, or rabbit, because he disliked the taste. His other appetites, however, were strong. For example, he enjoyed carrots very much. Vegetables were an important part of one's diet. He had thrown a tantrum once when he was younger because Uther had tried to ban carrots from the kingdom. Unfortunately, everyone in the kingdom had developed terrible eyesight, and so Uther was forced to reverse that ban, much to Arthur's delight.
Uther did uphold his ban on magic, though. There was the occasional attempt on Uther's life, but those were of little importance. Once in a while, there was a sorcerer or two that tried to kill Arthur, but for reasons unbeknownst to him, they usually ended up snickering and throwing lettuce at him instead.
Except one time, Uther invited the Lady Helen to sing for a feast shortly before Arthur was named Crown Prince and all of Uther's plans to solidify Arthur's claim on the throne—whatever form he took—came to naught.
"You've saved my life," Arthur said in awe, staring up at the servant with big ears, a bigger grin, and the brightest blue eyes Arthur had ever seen, save in his own mirror. He coughed and said in a more arrogant tone, "I am perfectly able to take care of myself, though."
"Are you?" his saviour said, raising his eyebrows. He reached down to help Arthur to his feet. "My name's Merlin, by the way."
"Merlin," Arthur repeated. He felt his nose twitch inexplicably.
As it turned out, Merlin was appointed Arthur's manservant after saving the prince's life. Neither were happy at the thought. Merlin grumbled at his increased workload in addition to being Gaius' apprentice, and Arthur found it harder and harder to keep his nose from twitching whenever Merlin was around.
Nevertheless, Arthur resolved to do his duty and showed Merlin around the castle. "These are the kitchens," Arthur said, entering the bustling room.
All the cooks and kitchen maids stopped to bow at the prince. Merlin smiled nervously, his eyes crinkling like crescents. "Hello," he said to the room, turning a bit pink at the ears.
"I would like some carrots," Arthur said unexpectedly. Merlin turned to look at him quizzically. "I have a sudden craving," Arthur explained. "You can share some, if you'd like," he added stiffly, and watched as Merlin's grin spread across his face.
"There's quite a spring in your step," Morgana commented as she and Arthur took a stroll around the courtyard.
"Yes, well, it's the weather. Great training for the knights," Arthur said. He didn't mention that his gaze was not on the knights, but on Merlin, who was currently hauling water from the pump while chatting and laughing with Gwen, Morgana's maidservant. Merlin caught sight of them and grinned, throwing Arthur a little wave. Arthur's arm was raised to wave back before he hurriedly tucked his hand behind his back.
"No, I meant literally," Morgana said, raising an eyebrow. "Why are you hopping up and down?"
Arthur sighed and woke up in a cozy nest of blankets. Sometime during the night, he had apparently burrowed his way into his bedclothes to make a kind of den. He was sure that dreaming of Merlin had absolutely nothing to do with it.
"Rise and shine!" Merlin called. He bumbled into the room with a breakfast tray and almost spilled half the water in the pitcher. "Er," Merlin said, setting the tray down on the table. "Did you have a good night's rest, sire?"
"Yes," Arthur said, but was much too comfortable within his blankets and made no move to get up from his bed.
Merlin grinned and made to pull Arthur up. "Come on, then," he said. "Got a busy day ahead of you."
Arthur stumbled slightly as he was dragged up and found himself nose to twitching nose with Merlin.
Merlin blinked and turned quite pink. "Oh," he said softly, and moved to press his mouth against Arthur's.
There was a poof! and suddenly Arthur found his surroundings much bigger. His range of vision was broader and his sense of hearing more acute. Well, that was different. Also, he was a lot warmer now that he was covered in fur. He didn't mind too much, though, and snuggled further into Merlin's arms and blinked up at him with his beady black eyes.
"I don't think that was supposed to happen," Merlin said doubtfully.
Arthur obediently lifted a paw as Gaius frowned and continued his examination. "I've sent for the king and queen," he said. "They should be arriving here shortly."
"What?" Merlin cried. "They'll have me beheaded for using sorcery! I don't even know what I did!"
Arthur tried to scowl threateningly but found it difficult in his current state. He had had no idea that Merlin was a sorcerer. To be fair, however, he was quite sure Merlin hadn't known he turned into a bunny after being kissed, so he grudgingly considered them even.
Gaius sighed. "I don't think this is quite your fault," he said. "I had best let the king explain."
As if on cue, the door to Arthur's chambers flew open.
"My son is what?" Uther roared.
"Oh, Arthur!" Ygraine cried, and strode over to the bed to scoop Arthur into her arms and stroke his ears. "Whatever happened to you?"
There was another sudden poof! and Arthur found himself a human again. And naked. "Mother!" he cried, scandalised, and yanked the bedclothes over himself.
Everyone stared until Gaius cleared his throat. "It appears that his transformation is temporary," he offered.
Ygraine patted her son's hair. "But how did this happen in the first place?" she asked.
Gaius looked at the king and raised an eyebrow.
"Arthur, there's something I need to tell you," Uther said. "Both of you," he continued, looking at his wife.
"That's ridiculous," Arthur said, ten minutes later. "Then that would mean that Merlin—" he cut himself off.
"What?" Merlin asked, confused. "Why's everyone staring at me?"
"You!" Uther snapped. "This is completely your fault. I've worked for years to keep Arthur from falling in love, and I won't be outdone by a simple peasant!"
"You forget, dear," Ygraine said, her voice cutting across the room, "that not only are you responsible for the curse and not informing me of it, but also of appointing Arthur a new manservant. And, as you are entirely responsible, I think it only fair that you don't ruin our son's chance at happiness with another. Many have fallen for much worse a man," she said pointedly. Ygraine stood up from the bed and walked over to where Merlin was standing. She brushed a kiss against his cheek before turning to her husband. "Come, Uther," she said. "We'll leave the two of them alone. We have a few things to discuss about curses and bargaining with other people's lives," she added, and smiled alarmingly.
Uther opened his mouth a few times, closed it, and then followed her out of the room without a word.
"Perhaps, sire, with a bit of practise, you may continue your amorous activities without transforming," Gaius said. "As your situation is temporary, I think that it has more to do with your emotional state than any other factor."
Arthur stared. "You're saying that I might be conditioned into not turning into a bunny every time Merlin kisses me?" he demanded.
"Yes, sire. Precisely," Gaius said. "I shall leave you to it. I will conduct some research to see if there is any other way to break this curse." He looked at Merlin significantly. "If anything goes amiss, send for me at once," he added, and left the room.
Arthur turned to Merlin. "You're a sorcerer," he said.
"Well, yes," Merlin said nervously.
Arthur sighed. "All right, then. Come on."
Merlin eyed him warily. "What is it exactly that you want me to do?" he asked.
"Come and kiss me, you idiot!"
Twenty kisses and twenty-one transformations later, they were still no closer to finding a happy medium.
"Perhaps we should try again when you're less nervous," Merlin said.
"I don't get nervous, Merlin," Arthur said irritably.
Merlin hummed and continued to stroke Arthur's hair. "You just like being pet when you're a bunny, is that it?"
"Shut up," Arthur said. "If you're so powerful a sorcerer, why don't you figure out a way to break this curse? I don't like the idea of turning into a bunny every time you kiss me."
"Well, would it be worth it even if you did?"
"...Maybe."
"If we ever get any further," Merlin began.
"I hope that we do," Arthur said determinedly.
Merlin made a face. "What if you still turn into a bunny during...?"
Arthur shook his head confidently. "No, that won't happen. This story doesn't have a warning for bestiality, see?"
Merlin was ordered to stay away from the prince during the day and was expressly forbidden to kiss him unless the two of them were alone. The rumour that Arthur Pendragon turned into a bunny whenever he was kissed by his true love never materialised. Instead, the whispers of the court stated that Camelot had, underneath its dungeons, a very large and enigmatic hare that breathed fire. It was also said that it spouted prophecies and cryptic advice to those who would dare to seek it out.
It was, perhaps, this rumour that hastened Nimueh's return to Camelot. She carefully timed her entrance to Arthur's chambers to coincide with a crack of thunder. Sure enough, Merlin and Arthur, on their tenth attempted make-out session, sprang apart like startled rabbits, one more literally than the other. Nimueh narrowed her eyes and surveyed her handiwork. "Well," she said. "I suppose this is the price of a life."
"Who are you?" Merlin demanded, and drew himself to his tallest height.
Nimueh smiled. "I am the one who placed the curse on Arthur," she said. "And you," she said, looking Merlin up and down, "must be his true love. I should thank you, I suppose. It could have been years before I could see the fruit of my labours, and even then Uther may have married him off to a princess he would never love."
"Not likely," Arthur muttered as soon as he turned back into himself.
"Have you come to gloat, then?" Merlin demanded. His eyes glowed golden in the dark. "I will free Arthur from this curse."
"I would like to see you try," Nimueh sneered, and raised a hand. "But before you do, know that there is a price: a life for a life. If you break the curse, Ygraine's life is forfeit."
Arthur was stricken. "Wait!" he cried.
"I'll just have to pay the price with your life, won't I?" Merlin said, and raised his arm in turn.
Magic crackled in the air. Nimueh shrieked in fury as their energies collided. She snarled a curse as she lifted her other hand and pointed it toward Arthur, still sitting on the bed.
"No!" Merlin shouted. "Silflay hraka, u embleer rah!"
A lightning bolt from Merlin's hand struck Nimueh, and she conveniently disintegrated into a black mark on the floor.
Arthur leapt up at once and ran to check on his mother.
"Of course I'm fine, darling," Ygraine said, patting his cheek. "Thank Merlin for me, won't you? And we shall hold a feast in celebration of the breaking of the curse. To your and Merlin's honour." She surveyed Arthur's state of dishabille. "Speaking of which, weren't you in the middle of something?" she asked archly.
Arthur fled back to his chambers and found Merlin poking at the smudge that had once been Nimueh.
Arthur stared at the still-smoking spot. "What on earth did you say to her?"
Merlin shifted awkwardly. "I, er, told her to eat shit and called her a stinking sorceress," he admitted.
"Oh." Arthur paused. "Well, you'll still have to scrub those markings off," he said.
"Right. But first I think we'd better see if the curse really is broken," Merlin said.
It turned out that the curse was broken for the most part, as Arthur no longer transformed when he was kissed, but he and Merlin still ended up fucking like bunnies.