Chapter Text
#general
---> Chat Noir just joined. Can I get a heal?
---> Ermagherd. bee-you-tiful is here.
Chat Noir: Oh my gosh! A real group chat! I've wanted to be in one of these since I first read group chat fanfiction a few years ago. And it's with Ladybug!
bee-you-tiful: hnnnnng
bee-you-tiful: that's right peasants be awed you don't deserve me
Chat Noir: Queenie!
bee-you-tiful: oh no you're one of those people
Chat Noir: What people?
bee-you-tiful: ladybug make me a mod i want to change grandpa's nickname
bee-you-tiful: the capitalization hurts my eyes
Chat Noir: I'm sorry?
ladybug: this was a bad idea
---> Welcome, rena the rogue. Stay a while and listen.
rena the rogue: queenie you would be a horrible mod
---> Swoooosh. carapeace just landed.
carapeace: swoosh
bee-you-tiful: i would not
carapeace: if anyone should be a mod it's chat. i mean he is ladybug's partner
ladybug: chat noir being a mod is almost as bad of an idea as queenie being one
Chat Noir: What's a mod?
bee-you-tiful: excuse you i would make a great mod because
ladybug: if chat became a mod he'd just change everyone's nicknames to puns
ladybug: because what
Chat Noir: I can do that?
ladybug: no
Chat Noir: 3:
bee-you-tiful: ladybug do something about this before i block him
ladybug: who taught chat noir to use cat emoticons
Chat Noir: I'm not completely new to the internet, m'lady.
bee-you-tiful: then why the heck do you type like a grandpa
Chat Noir: My father says that teenagers who text with grammatical errors and no capitalization are lazy and stupid.
rena the rogue: honey my phone automatically capitalizes everything it takes work to text this well
rena the rogue: it's all for the Aesthetic
bee-you-tiful: ew more capitals
bee-you-tiful: chat noir, i say this with the utmost respect but
bee you-tiful: screw your father
carapeace: rdgtiuewyth;ozrjsdz
Chat Noir: ...
chat noir: ...you're right.
rena the rogue: one of us one of us
carapeace: one of us one of us one of us
chat noir: :3
ladybug: i'm proud of you chat
ladybug: but please stop with the cat emojis
chat noir: :3
chat noir: ooh italics!
ladybug: okay while we're all online i'm going to make a channel with rules
rena the rogue: ew
carapeace: dude rules are there for a reason
rena the rogue: eat the rich
rena the rogue: except for adrien agreste he's cool
chat noir: gthuei;ythioewhtgzb
bee-you-tiful: valid
#rules
ladybug: okay grond rules
ladybug: *ground
ladybug: shut up i don't need to be in the channel to know what you're all saying
ladybug: okay number one
ladybug: don't do anything to reveal your identity or that of anyone else
ladybug: don't hint, don't tell it, and don't try to figure anyone else's out
ladybug: that means you rena
ladybug: also please don't spam too much i realize it's nice to have a place to chat with friends but first and foremost this is here to alert each other for hero stuff
ladybug: i love you guys but you have no chill
ladybug: except carapace i guess he's cool
ladybug: i'll just make a channel for akuma alerts i guess
ladybug: please don't spam in there or @everyone unless there's an emergency
ladybug: actually please don't mention me at all unless there's an emergency
ladybug: i have a life i need sleep
ladybug: that's all for now but i will be back
#general
rena the rogue: grond
carapeace: grond
bee-you-tiful: grond
chat noir: what?
chat noir: oh
rena the rogue: wow i feel called out
chat noir: !!
chat noir: i love you too ladybug! you're my best friend
rena the rogue: hey @ladybug can i be a mod so i can set some of my own rules
chat noir: i mean other than plagg and my civilian best friend and my childhood best friend because i love all of them a lot too
carapeace: dude she just said not to @ her
rena the rogue: oops
bee-you-tiful: rena would be a worse mod than me and chat combined
carapeace: that's fair
rena the rogue: aww come on guys i just wanted to outlaw peanut butter
chat noir: peanut butter? why would you want to outlaw peanut butter
rena the rogue: because
chat noir: because what?
rena the rogue: because
chat noir: ...
ladybug: no
ladybug: please don't make me regret this guys
carapeace: can i make a suggestion for the rules
ladybug: i'll take it under advisement
carapeace: no pda
rena the rogue: i'm breaking up with you
bee-you-tiful: f
carapeace: welp i guess chat's my boyfriend now
chat noir: i'd like that!
bee-you-tiful: i can't tell if he's joking or if he genuinely would like to date carapace
chat noir: come on, who wouldn't want to date carapace?
ladybug: rena, apparently
rena the rogue: you know what you did
carapeace: :(
chat noir: :)
carapeace: ...:)
bee-you-tiful: pure
rena the rogue: chat noir? pure? in that suit? i don't think so
chat noir: what's wrong with my suit?
bee-you-tiful: honey
rena the rogue: don't play dumb
ladybug: it's... very "sexy catboy"
rena the rogue: oh my god ladybug just called chat noir sexy
carapeace: nO PDA
bee-you-tiful: no capitals my eyes are dying
chat noir: f
chat noir: but seriously guys. what's wrong with my suit?
ladybug: i mean there's the bell for starters
chat noir: what's wrong with the bell? kids love the bell. it helps keep them calm when i carry them to safety!
bee-you-tiful: you said you read fanfiction. you know
chat noir: know what? what does fanfiction have to do with anything?
rena the rogue: seriously chat stop teasing us
bee-you-tiful: ...lemons
chat noir: what do lemons have to do with fanfiction?
rena the rogue: oh my god he actually doesn't know
ladybug: it's smut chat
chat noir: oh
chat noir: oh
chat noir: ohhhh
bee-you-tiful: please stop
chat noir: i don't actually read any of that stuff. it says you have to be majority age for a reason, and the idea of it just makes me feel uncomfortable? i don't know. i mean it's cool if other people or even other aces read it! it's just not for me.
chat noir: and what does that have to do with my suit? i don't think it's inappropriate or anything. i mean, i've worn worse.
carapeace: ignoring the fact that chat says he's worn worse
bee-you-tiful: you're ace?
bee-you-tiful: if you don't mind me asking
rena the rogue: but you flirt so much!
carapeace: aces can be flirty, rena. i mean i'm demi and i've been known to flirt a time or two.
chat noir: yeah, i think so? i mean i'm not 100% sure. i was pretty sheltered growing up and only had one friend. i guess i could just be a late bloomer because of that? but i don't know. the label's just felt right for a few years. i'm not entirely sure on my romantic orientation. i mean my crush on ladybug started as soon as i felt a deep connection with her but that was also like immediately because i'm desperate for friends. so i spent a while after that warring with myself over whether i was really crushing on her or if i just really really wanted to be super close friends. i think it's both. i think. i'm not sure. and all of my friends keep telling me i have a crush on this other girl and it's getting kind of frustrating? because she's a nice person but i can barely get a handle on my feelings for one person let alone two. and platonic relationships are a thing. i don't think i have a crush on her but i actually have no idea what the difference is between feeling a romantic crush and wanting to be close friends with someone so. please someone help.
carapeace: i support you, dude!
chat noir: !!!
chat noir: ace spectrum buddies! -high five-
carapeace: -high five-
bee-you-tiful: thank you for trusting us with that, chat. i kind of get how it feels? it took me forever to realize i was bi and even then it took me a while to actually feel comfortable with that label.
chat noir: you're bi, queenie? that's great! thank you for trusting us.
chat noir: also i have the perfect nickname for you
bee-you-tiful: ...what
chat noir: queen bi!
queen bi: ...i don't hate it
ladybug: wow... that means a lot to me that you would trust us enough to tell us that, chat. thank you. and i'm sorry if i've ever given you mixed signals on our relationship. i mean there's another guy i really like so i never really looked at you like that? i'm a bi disaster
rena the rogue: oh come on you're a functional bi at least
rena the rogue: i'm the disaster pan here
carapeace: i'd like to think i'm a distinguished demi but tbh i'm probably barely functional
queen bi: i'm both distinguished and a disaster at the same time. fear me
rena the rogue: you know, i can't argue with that
queen bi: boys and girls are both so freaking pretty
rena the rogue: can't argue with that logic either
carapeace: hey where did chat and ladybug go
Direct Message: @Chat Noir & @ladybug
Chat Noir: no! if anything the fault is mine, ladybug. the most important thing is that i don't make you uncomfortable. and i'm sorry if i ever have and i'll try to do better when you ask me to back off. it doesn't excuse my actions but i genuinely had no idea how coming after you like that could have seemed? there's this girl who's been getting kind of handsy with me lately and i was talking with a friend of mine and he told me that that's sexual harassment? it was making me really uncomfortable and i didn't even know that was a thing that could be happening to me. but it got me thinking about you. and i've been thinking over what to say for a few days but i really wanted to let you know that it wasn't intentional and i'll back off from the flirting and nicknames if you want. please tell me if i make you uncomfortable because i was pushy and a jealous prick and that was wrong of me. you're my friend first and foremost.
ladybug: oh kitty. thank you for saying that. but we're good, okay? i'm so sorry you're going through that and to heck with secret identities please feel free to keep me updated on that situation because that's Not Okay. i'm completely fine with our relationship how it is. you're important to me. you're my best friend and i like the flirting and the nicknames and the banter and keep this a secret please but i even like the puns. as long as you back off when i seriously tell you to, we're good. and it is on me a little, because i should have made my boundaries clearer. if i ever really sound serious about you backing off, please do, but i know you will and i can promise that that moment either won't happen or will happen very rarely. please don't feel bad.
Chat Noir: ladybug, please don't think it's your fault! because it's not. my friend told me that it's never the fault of the person who's being harassed and that's true here too
ladybug: you weren't harassing me, minou, i promise
Chat Noir: promise not to laugh?
ladybug: promise
Chat Noir: it just occurred to me recently that the way i flirt isn't actually how most people flirt? i was super sheltered and i didn't realize that people don't actually flirt like they do in anime until like... three days ago when i was called out on it. i'm an idiot.
ladybug: you're not an idiot. being sheltered doesn't make you stupid.
Chat Noir: nah, i'm just oblivious i guess. or maybe just a disaster ace
ladybug: ily chaton <3
Chat Noir: ily too my lady <333 :3
#general
chat noir: ladybug said she likes my puns!
queen bi: we know honey
ladybug: well then
ladybug: chat noir learned to flirt from anime
rena the rogue: yeah we know that too
carapeace: f