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Pop-style music blasted out while cat-eared spider robots tried to impress their senpai with different fighting styles at school. This was a weird anime.
Sans munched on some ketchup flavored chips while Alphys ate the shrimp flavored cracker they got from a Japan snack mailing box. It was a Friday night: When Papyrus and Undyne battles both in the yard and kitchen and while Sans and Alphys binged on anime she had already watched with Undyne. Staying in and doing nothing was the best, and this way Papyrus could relax, too. The taller skeleton had been getting stressed with work and hanging out with Undyne always cheered him up. It was like the opposite of a double date where friendship reigned.
The intro music ended and a filler episode started. Glancing from side to side, Alphys put down a cup of her yellow soda and shakily lowered the volume of the episode. The shorter skeleton glanced over.
“H-hey so…. Since P-papyrus and Undyne are busy out there battling, d-do you think this is a good time to uh,... you know… “ Her face sweated. She felt like it was a forbidden topic. Because it kind of was.
“...talk about what the kid said…?” he questioned flatly.
Alphys nodded. She wrung her hands and seemed reluctant herself. “I- I told myself I needed to s-stop leaving things alone when they made me uncomfortable but… like… before…. I think you can h-help me out.”
Sans rolled up the bag of chips and sat upright. “what do you need? i’m here for you.”
Alphy’s heart swelled. She had such a good friend! SHE DIDN’T DESERVE HIM OR UNDYNE OR---No. She did. She was good. She had friends who cared for her and this is what they do.
Of course, that didn’t stop her from drying a few tears. It was a little too familiar regarding the topic.
“... I’ve been working on a machine, that has to do with...that… and I need your help, s-specifically. I-it’s a two person job because-”
“we can start when frisk and papyrus have to visit the police station where undyne works on monday.”
Alphys hesitated at his sudden answer “B-but I didn’t even explain what-”
“nah, it’s fine. i’ll help you out.” Sans could sense the same hesitation from Alphys like the last time he stumbled across her last scientific endeavor. It had been a while since she went back into the lab, and if she needed help again, he would support that. He understood what it was like to be stranded in a similar situation. Plus the topic was interesting. It’s probably the selfish reason he had helped in the first place.
The lizard creature was overcome with emotion and started to well up again. And then the back porch door slammed open .
“NGGGAHH!! WHAT DID YOU DO TO ALPHYS??” A spear formed in Undyne's fist as she slammed her boot on the armrest of the chair. Her angry but toothy grin gleamed in the light of the TV as she rolled a 19 on intimidation.
Sans blankly stared at her with his standard grin. A bone suddenly flew by her head and knocked her spear into the wall. It’s a good thing they bought this house or their deposit would have been long gone.
“PLEASE DO NOT KEBOB THE BROTHER” shouted Papyrus from the door. “I’M SURE THERE IS A REASONABLE EXPLANATION FOR HER TEARS? PERHAP HE TOLD A TERRIBLE PUN.”
Alphys dried her tears once more “N-no, no, I just hate how this filler episode always makes me cry. It clearly doesn’t affect the plot but it still gets me.” she sniffed
Undyne relaxed as she glanced at the TV “Yeah, well Ono is just like that. She needs to focus on her baking, not this dumb statistical pamphlet.”
Sans still has no idea what this show was about.
The fish huffed and glanced at the wall “Anyway, we should start making dinner. Kebobs do sound good.” She paused and glared at her friend with intensity “HEY PAPYRUS, LET’S DO THIS!”
Forming a spear, Papyrus and Undyne then ran outside to the already abused BBQ and began stabbing items from the garden.
-----
A hum of computers and the smell of stale ramen. It was Alphy’s new lab on the surface on Monday. It had been built a year ago, but only looked as though the activity within only occurred within the last two months. The lizard monster herself pulled out a clipboard as her skeleton friend entered the room.
Looking forward, Sans was happy to see his friend finally getting back into the field of science. Up ahead it looked like a computer system set up. Wires hooked up to a monitor and a few mechanical boxes that displayed screens and lights. In the middle of the room was a strange vessel that was round but also had metal handles on the side. Multiple wires from the vessel machine lead to the computer as well as other monitoring equipment. Some equipment with wires weren’t connected to the machine at all, just more monitoring equipment and computers.
Alphys looked nervous as ever but she had even put on a new lab coat as she was serious. “should i be wearing one too?” he asked.
“N-no… “ She answered “Y-you actually won’t n-need one-”
Sans grinned “ah, so i’m on breaker duty.” and he nodded his head towards the breaker box in case her experiment used up too much power and tripped the wires
“....n-n-no… a-a-actually I need you to be… in the experiment.”
Alphys hid slightly behind her clipboard as the grin on Sans face fell. You could see he wanted to express a few other emotions, but instead took a breath. His friend finally got back into science and he can’t afford to shut her down so quickly. He has to phrase this correctly.
“....what-…. why not- ….” Another breath. How to get out of this? “can’t you do this with undyne? i’m not exactly a picture perfect example of a healthy monster.”
She shook her head. “W-when Frisk told us Flowey- th-the flower… creature… took all our souls together as one a-and broke the barrier… not only d-did our souls get that ability, b-but we s-still survived! Aa-and, a-and, we don’t even.. Even know h-how that affected us, affected our b-bodies, o-our… s-souls… b-but most of all… h-how it even happened.” Her hands moved and you could see fear, confusion, disbelief and disappear in her explanation. “I g-gotta start somewhere on this, a-and I can’t -” she motioned her hands in front of her self, drawing a soul “...‘SEE’ her soul or w-where it was in the body when this all… h-happened. T-this machine… it can r-replicate what happened v-very close by. A-AND IT WOULD O-ONLY BE YOUR SHIRT-- n-nothing else, I p-promise.” She waved her hands quickly and went slightly red.
Because he was a skeleton, his soul could be seen without engaging it. It was a rare trait for a monster type. He did NOT want to do this. “why me, why not papyrus?”
Alphys tilted her head “I mean, would you be okay with me running this test with your b-brother? B-because usually-”
His hands pressed against his forehead. “aaaaugh, no, no, you’re right.” He didn’t even know why he asked. He really didn’t want to do this but he also really didn’t want his brother to do it either.
She shuffled a little and looked around. “It’s… safe. You know. I tried it on myself” She motioned to the machine and the monitoring equipment nearby. “It just.. F-feels weird. Your soul… it’s in the glass, b-but it doesn’t feel like it left your b-body, e-either.
Sans just gazed at the machine reluctantly. He made sense. It’s safe. He is the prime candidate in this case.
“fine.”
She grinned “R-really? Wow, t-that’s-”
“but you can only make notes. no pictures, no videos, no weird drawings ... or friendfictions.” he had to add that last part after a previous interaction. “so get rid of the camera on your computer, on that wall, and in that house-plant.” He knew her locations well. “and turn that cat doll around. it creeps me out.”
She bit her lip. “....Okay. Fair.” And then started around the room, covering or removing the cameras and turning around all the action figures. Sans took off his shirt and tried not to let this all bother him. He didn’t know why, but he wasn’t a big fan of this. He was a very personal skeleton!
After Sans got into position, he was guided to place his hands on the glass vessel and the metal handlebars connected to it. Next, Alphys wheeled the monitoring equipment over and started to put sensors on her friend. One on his head near his eye, and one on his wrist for vitals. She began to approach his chest and he stopped her.
“please don’t put anything on my soul.” his face jokingly cringed.
She snorted a laugh for a second. “W-well, I mean, it’s not really TANGIBLE, Sans!... B-but I do need them nearby… so…”
He sighed, took a breath, and then nodded his head, allowing her to continue.
Rolling out the medical tape, she began to weave the wires through his rips and place them inside his rib cage, securing them in place.
“--srk!...” A breath “...gnehe..” another breath. “snkhehe-heh-eheh” A really deep breath “.... ehEK! GEH-” he took one hand of the machine to quickly cover his mouth.
Alphys looked up and smiled. “Oh my God??? That’s so cute??”
He short a stern look. She was really pushing her luck, today.
“Right. Science.” She quickly glanced at the tape and decided that was enough. After all, Sans probably wouldn’t let her continue from this point. She started the machine and pulled out her clipboard, ready to record. “Okay, Sans, this test will take t-ten minutes. You won’t be able to move during this time….. L-let me know when you’re ready.”
Sans took a deep breath His hands squeezed the machine handles and you could see his grey soul pulse nervously within his rib cage. “........ready.”
The machine surged and Sans could feel a power moving through the vessel's handles. His breath was shaking as before his eyes he saw his soul. In a glass container. Fascinated, Alphys started jotting down notes,
Sans immediately pulled his hands, but they would not move. He could not move. Not his feet, not his legs, not his arms or even his head. But he could move his eyes. He had to see! Looking down he saw the mere outline of his soul. He glanced at Alphys who glanced from him to her clipboard, to the screens, and back to him. The experiment was working. But he didn’t really feel great. He felt trapped, he couldn’t move, nothing was moving!
“S-sans… Your pulse and stress levels a-are really high… , y-you gotta b-breathe”
Had he been holding his breath this whole time? Sure, he didn’t have lungs but something about breathing did allow skeletons to function. He pulled in a sudden breath and tried to control it. He wasn’t doing great.
“S-sans… your HP level keeps fluctuating in a way that’s hard to read… N-not that you’re in d-danger! It just… doesn’t help the experiment…” her voice trailed off She knew this wasn’t his fault.
He was trying. But it was a weird experience of his soul being both inside and outside his body that he wasn’t prepared for. It wasn’t hurting him but it was… scary! He was a little scared but didn’t want to admit it. Unfortunately, his levels couldn’t lie. “...’m sorry. guess i’m not level headed enough....” He could still pun. He never used his mouth to talk.
She frowned at the monitor. Not because of what Sans was doing, but because one of the sensors went out. “H-hold on…. I just gotta fix this…” She set down her clipboard and headed over to Sans’ left rib/soul monitor. After all that struggling to get the sensors on, she apparently didn’t get to tighten this one just right. Reaching out with her hands, she tried to lightly press the tape back on by sliding her thumb claw back and forth.
“NEH!-heh-hehhe-srk” And Sans’ face flushed from embarrassment. He wasn’t expecting that! He couldn’t really turn his head to see where she was. “h-hey now..”
Alphys lifted her hands away from him “S-sorry! The sensor was f-falling off…” And she headed back to the computer. Sans just rolled his eyes in response.
Sitting down, Alphys picked up her clipboard and looked at the monitors once more. She looked surprised and started clicking different icons with her keyboard and mouse. She looked to her clipboard The clock, her monitor again. “H-hey, Sans?”
He exhaled another shaky breath. If he could move, his knees would probably start shaking. But he was doing this for science! “yeah?”
SHe opened her mouth, but closed it again She had to pick her words carefully. “S-so, uh… the results h-have been a little shaky b-but… I was able to get some important data from you…when uh..” She gave a small laugh “W-when I was fixing the s-sensor…?”
He was silent for a moment. “...what are you trying to say, alphys?”
While he couldn’t see it, she was smiling nervously. “I-I’m saying… t-that to get t-the most accurate data… it was when you were… l-laughing and….”
Sans’ nerves were off the charts. He wished she would actually look at him or be in the direct he could look at when talking about his medical state! “alphys, just tell me!” he stated, expecting the worst.
“I GET THE MOST STABLE AND ACCURATE RESULTS WHEN I ACCIDENTALLY TICKLED YOU!” she shouted, her claws shaking, probably just as embarrassed.
No. She could never be this embarrassed. “oh my god.” it finally hit him.
Another award pause. Another minute of bad data. “S-sans…. If I’m able to get j-just a few minutes, I-I won’t ever ask for it a-again……”
The weight of the anticipation was throwing off the accuracy of results even more. “...hhgmmnmnnine?” he mumbled.
“W-what..?”
A deep breath “h-how many minutes are left in the test?”
“...J-just over three.” She answered, stepping closer.
“.....do it.”
Her eyes lit up “R-Really?? You’re giving consent to-”
“don’t write the paper now, just do it, already!!” His face flooded with embarrassment. He was going to die.
“O-okay…!”
Alphys, in a moment of adrenaline, rushed over and immediately started clawing lightly at the lower ribs that attached to the spine. Her claws scraped cautiously but methodically as she never had to tickle someone for science before.
The skeleton immediately started to feel the laughter bubble up inside of him. Why was she tickling him so lightly?? Not that he wanted it harder but this was almost driving him crazy in a couple seconds??
“........eh-heh-heheheheheh- snk -nehehehe-aa!” If he could shake his head back and forth, he would. “Nyoooh my god-aheheheh- sk- ah-ah-ahlphys ck-” a gasp “ck-come ohnnuhuhuhun…” A few silent giggles that could be heard in this breathing.
Aplphys couldn’t help but laugh alongside him “Heheh, I-I mean u-uhm, are you doing okay?”
“snkkgehehehe…” Another silent laugh. “gohoho somewhere ehehlse…! ehehe!” that spot for so long was too much!
Alphys panicked, but then complied, raising her hands higher to just under his arms. Sans immediately regretted what he said.
“aih-! eh-HEHEHEHEAHAHA snk EHAH!” a few silent laughs and a gasp for air. “”aIH TAEHEHEKE IEHEHEIT BAHAHACK!!” hearty laughs could be heard now “Gehehet OUHUHTA THehere!-SNK EHAHA”
She lizard immediately lowered her hands back to where she had started.She would never do anything against her friend.
“Eeeaaaughahaha nyuh nahhahaheheheh” A breath “H-how muhuhch lohongererheheher?” was it seconds? Minutes? Hours? It felt like hours.
“T-twenty more seconds…!” She exclaimed, looking at the clock. “I-I’ll try to m-make it easy on you…” Her fingers skittered from the back to the front of his ribs, occasionally her claws falling into the gaps in between.
“Nheh! Heheheheyahaha! Srk EhahAHA…!” his shoulders wished they could shake“Nyhohoho ehhaahehehahah…!” After a few moments a beeping in triplicate occurred and Sans felt his soul reenter his body and the grip on his body release him.
Quickly reaching out her arms, Alphys caught her friend and knelt on the floor as he collapsed. Still giggling, Sans weakly batted at her hands and closed his eyes with his permanent grin.
“Hey hey, calm d-down… You’re done, it’s over…” She looked over and grabbed his shirt off the nearby table, as well as bottled water she always left out claiming she would drink but never did.
Sans let her help him put the shirt back on, happy to be covered, and he drinks some water in between residual laughs. After a few moments he opened his eyes. “thanks....did you get the data?”
Surprised at that being the first thing, she replied. “...yes?”
Taking a breath, Sans sat up, getting off his friend. “good, because i am never doing that again.”
After a pause, Alphys responded. “Y-yeah, after this whole experiment I g-guess you could say I got a pretty good… reaction.”
He paused. “srnk-!” and then turned to his friend. There was peace back in the lab once again.
….
“no but seriously, no friendfictions”