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It was Dean’s sixteenth birthday party, and instead of tailgating outside the monster truck rally like he’d asked for, he was ‘entertaining’ family and friends at home. Except by ‘family and friends,’ what he really meant was ‘people I’m related to but don’t want to see ever’ and ‘far too few friends.’ And by ‘entertaining,’ he meant ‘getting dragged slowly but surely into madness.’
Dean sat in his own living room, on his birthday, and told himself suicide was not an option.
“Isn’t that such a coincidence?” Mary Campbell exclaimed, hand over her chest. “Gwen’s considering a major in journalism as well!”
It took all of Dean’s strength not to roll his eyes, and from the looks of it, Gwen was feeling the same way. She and Dean were seated on either side of their grandmother as she attempted to match-make, apparently not getting the memo that neither of them would be interested in the other even if they weren’t cousins.
“That’s interesting,” Dean agreed blandly, wishing he’d come up with some other sarcastic remark that would fly right over his grandmother’s head. “What type?”
“Scientific,” Gwen answered, zoning out across the room at the multitude of relatives making awkward conversation. At least the food was okay, Dean decided, as his mom and Sam had cooked most of it. And if he got out of this conversation, Uncle Johnny was opening a twelve-pack and could probably be convinced to sneak Dean a can.
He heaved a sigh. “Too bad. I’m going for investigative. We’ll probably be mortal enemies.”
Gwen actually looked at him now, a spark growing in her eyes. She quirked a lip. “Probably.”
“That’s adorable,” Mary cooed. “You know, my husband and I had quite a courtship, back in our day. We argued all the time. It really adds spice to a relationship, if you know what I mean.”
Dean’s head hit the table as Gwen moaned something about not wanting to hear that.
“I’m just giving you two some advice, in case you happen to meet someone who interests you.” Mary’s completely innocuous and not at all suspicious comment was accompanied by a hand-wave in their faces, totally intended to encompass the entire room and not them specifically. Yeah.
“I’m dating someone,” Dean said desperately, just to get her to shut the hell up. And then he looked around.
It was one of those moments when a lull in everyone’s conversation happened at once, and everyone was now staring at Dean, as the only person whose voice had carried throughout the room.
“You’re dating someone?” his mother asked from the couch, where she was talking to Dean’s grandfather. In the doorway to the kitchen, his father’s eyebrows knitted together. Uncle Bobby’s eyes were wide with surprise in front of the TV, and in the corner with Charlie, Castiel and Meg were both shaking their heads at him.
But they were shaking their heads for different reasons, and that was what decided him.
“Yeah,” he said, casual like his hands weren’t shaking all of a sudden. “Cas.”
Scattered exclamations from the few people in the living room who knew Cas. Confusion but not much care from the ones who didn’t. Complete silence from that corner, and Meg wasn’t looking at him, and Cas was, and Charlie sort of seemed likely to upchuck.
“That’s so sweet!” Mary said enthusiastically, though she patted Gwen’s shoulder as though to comfort the poor girl. “When will we meet this girl. I assume her full name is Cassandra?”
Swallowing down his rabbiting heart, Dean shoved the chair back (a bit too hard; it hit someone’s foot and nearly tripped him) and headed to the corner. He dragged Cas to his feet, clutching his hand tightly. “Cas, everyone. Everyone, my boyfriend.”
By the fireplace, Jo was trying to smother herself with a pillow.
“We’ve got to go. Enjoy the barbecue!”
He ran out of there, Castiel forced to stumble along beside him, and by the time Meg reached them on the sidewalk, he was giggling hysterically.
“It’s a complete mess in there,” she said dryly. “You really fucked this one up, Dorothy.”
The living room was in the back of the house, or else they wouldn’t have gotten away with it, but in that moment Dean honestly wouldn’t have cared if they got caught when he grabbed her face and kissed her with all the pent-up tension that was making him shake.
She steadied him with her small hands on his sides, and wiped a breakaway tear from his cheek when he let her go. She scoffed at the weakness in his manly armor, but there was no venom.
He turned to Castiel, who was standing beside them awkwardly, and smiled at their boyfriend’s uncertain look. “I thought you were concerned your family would not be receptive to your sexual preferences?”
“Yeah, well…” ‘Anything to make my grandma stop the incestual match-making’ didn’t actually seem like a good excuse, now that he thought about it. And when Meg was, for once, looking at him with pride, neither did it seem okay to say ‘I was actually planning to make up a girlfriend.’ “It’s out there now, right? If they’re gonna freak, at least it’ll all be at once.”
The tentative look in Cas’s eyes disappeared, and he managed a smile, so of course Dean had to kiss that, too. Which turned out to be lucky, since that was when his real family came crashing through the front door.
Dean turned to his parents and his little brother on the porch. Sam was beaming. His mom had tears in her eyes, but her hands clasped over her chest and a watery smile, so that was okay. And his dad was shaking his head with a weird look.
“Think you just pissed off half the Campbells, son.”
Dean’s hand in Castiel’s tightened unconsciously, and Cas squeezed back.
His dad grinned. “So I think I owe you a personal debt of gratitude.” Dean’s mom punched his shoulder, not gently, either, and he laughed.
Dean suddenly felt like crying, and hell no, that wasn’t happening, but then his mom came down the steps to hug him, and Sam bounced over for the same, and his dad came down after them. And maybe his was crying just a little, because when he looked back at Cas and Meg, Cas’s bashful smile was fuzzy and he couldn’t tell which finger Meg was holding up at him.
He didn't mean for it to happen, but Dean was an all-or-nothing kind of guy.
“Um,” he interrupted the love-fest, and wiped away the tears that really weren’t there, because this was important. “I have something else to tell you, actually.”
He waved them over. Castiel came willingly, because he didn’t get any hugs at home, so he acted like a puppy around Dean’s family. Meg stayed where she was, because she wore all black and black make-up and had overheard Dean’s parents once say that she was a bad influence, like six months ago. He waved again, and she closed the distance by a few feet.
Dean broke away from his family and took her hand. Cas grabbed his on the other side, and it was so cliché (well, not that this situation was cliché, really, but it was cheesy at least) that he had to fight not to roll his eyes or blush. “I said I was dating Cas to fuck with those uptight assholes, and I am, but… we’re both dating Meg, too.” It was said in a rush, because swearing, insulting Mom’s relatives, and being a man-whore were all things to be aired out quickly, right?
It was, apparently, that kind of day.
His parents wore the same look of shock, and said nothing.
“I KNEW IT!” Sam shouted, far louder than he had any right, and actually jumped up and down. “I said you were dating Meg, I called it!”
“Shut up shorty,” Dean snapped, but with a bit of a grin, because Sam had skipped straight over the whole ‘dating two people at once’ thing. Yeah, he should have known Sammy wouldn’t give a crap. No doubt he’d be pestered by questions later, but right now, he loved his brother like nothing else in the world.
“Dean,” his dad began, and from the set of his shoulders this wasn’t going to be good. “Have you three thought this through? Relationships can be—” he shot a glance at his wife “—complicated things. You sure you’re ready to do that, times three?”
He trailed off at the end, because his wife was laughing. “Look at you, casting that particular stone,” Dean’s mom laughed. “Don’t you remember Tara?”
Dean’s dad’s face turned red brighter and faster than he’d ever seen. “Well… that was the seventies,” he muttered eventually, and the smile on his face made Dean wish brain bleach was a real thing.
“Exactly,” Mary said meaningfully. “I think Dean and his… friends, will be just fine,” she finished.
“Great,” Dean said after a few moments. “So… since we can’t exactly go back inside now… think we could head over to the monster truck rally now?”
Charlie and Jo started cheering from the porch and Sam started begging their parents to let him go too. Dean’s parents were busy laughing and explaining age limits to the unhappy twelve-year-old.
Dean wrapped his arms around Meg, who hugged him far too easily, and Cas, who was practically glowing. “And they all lived happily ever after,” he told them, because Meg was teaching him to be a little shit, too. A watery snort came from her face tucked into Dean’s neck, and Dean could only hold them tighter.
