Work Text:
“ADRIEN AGRESTE WHAT THE EVERLOVING FUCK IS WRONG WITH YOU?”
Nino’s furious shout echoed through the apartment from the bathroom. In the living room, Marinette squeaked and froze like a deer in headlights, Alya stared wide-eyed down the hall where her boyfriend was, and Adrien Agreste calmly sipped his tea.
“The fuck did you do now?” Alya asked, turning a piercing gaze onto him. Adrien, well versed in the art of cockblocking inquisitive reporters, smirked enigmatically into his cup.
“Wait for it,” he said, and practically on cue Nino burst from the hallway wiping damp hands on his jeans.
“YOU,” he bellowed, stalking up to Adrien and pointing a finger mere centimeters from the blond’s nose. Adrien’s smirk widened, baring perfectly white teeth.
“Me,” he agreed amiably.
“WHY THE FUCK WOULD YOU STICK GIANT GOOGLY EYES TO THE TOILET?!”
Alya stared at him, bewildered. Marinette buried her face in her hands with a protracted groan.
Adrien took another infuriatingly calm sip of his tea. “It’s a looky loo, Nino.”