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When Peter wakes up, he’s alone.
This confused him, because he was certain that he fell asleep next to Tony. He remembered callused fingers in his hair and a steady heartbeat under his ear. He looked around the room despite being clearly on his own.
Before he could further dwell on it, the door flew open and May was stepping in the room.
“Hey baby, how are you feeling?” Peter was about to answer until he took a good look at May. She was wearing a royal blue dress and tall nude heels.
“Why are you dressed up?” A look of sympathy crossed May’s features as soon as the question left his mouth.
“Peter, you have your conference today, did you forget?”
But he already did the press conference, didn’t he?
“What?“
“Your press conference, you know, the one that starts at seven? I have your suit dry cleaned and ready to go, so get out of bed and start getting dressed before we’re late... I don’t know why you decided now was a good time to take a nap.”
Peter felt himself nodding, despite feeling disoriented. He couldn’t tell if this was an illusion but he decided to go along with it anyway.
“Okay, uh- let me brush my teeth and then I’ll get ready.” May smiled proudly as he jumped out of bed.
“Let’s try to be out the door in twenty minutes, okay? That’s when Happy’s picking us up.”
Peter got dressed as quickly as he could, ignoring the pure and unadulterated fear filling his veins. He had everything on except for his tie, but with May’s help, he was able to properly secure it around his neck after only three tries. Before he knew it, he was in the car listening to May and Happy flirt back and forth. At one point he fake gagged, causing May to laugh and nudge his shoulder.
Then he was backstage, pacing back and forth in anticipation. To say Peter was terrified would be the understatement of the century. He continued to bite the inside of his lip until he began to taste metal.
It was then five minutes before the press conference, and Peter suddenly had to pee. He was hesitant in telling Pepper but she was surprisingly understanding. The two had become much closer during the time when Tony was in a coma. He thinks that might have been why she let him leave. Eventually, he was sprinting to the bathroom.
Peter looked at his reflection in the mirror. The bags under his eyes combined with his pale face was not doing him any favors. He was thinking about hiding in the stall when the door slammed open. This time, it was Tony who walked in.
“You ready to wow them kiddo?”
“No.” Peter didn’t have the energy to lie, and a feeling of hopelessness quickly took over him.
“Mr. Stark... I feel like I’m having deja vu.” Tony snorted at that.
“You and me both, do you know how many times I’ve had to wait backstage for a press event. They get worse as you do more- it’s a goddamn nightmare.”
Nightmare
“How do I know this is real?” Tony smile disappeared at that.
“This is real.”
“But how do I know?”
“I have an idea.” Tony walked over so he was directly behind Peter, both of them staring at the reflection now.
“Break the mirror.” Peter looked at him to make sure he wasn’t joking. Tony seemed completely serious.
“What?”
“You heard me, break the mirror. If it shatters, then you know it’s real.”
The logic made sense to Peter, but he hesitated anyway, scared to break public property. Tony must have read his mind.
“Don’t worry about the mirror, I’ll pay for a new one and have it replaced in a day.”
“Mr. Stark, I can’t ask you to do that.”
“Well it’s a good thing you didn’t ask then, try not to forget that I’m a billionaire.” Peter looked at Tony once again just in time to see him wink.
“Are you sure this will work?”
“No, but I’m not wrong very often.” Tony had a point.
“Okay, okay, I’m gonna try it... stand back a little so the glass doesn’t hit you.” Tony took a few steps back and raised an eyebrow expectantly, waiting.
Peter looked back at his reflection and sat up straight. He raised a fist, counted to three, then punched the mirror with all of his strength.
~~~
When Peter wakes up, he’s alone.
He bolts out of bed and looks at the alarm clock. The time read 12:03 PM. He can’t remember the last time he’s slept until noon. He’s always had issues with sleeping, especially after everything that has happened with Thanos.
This time he woke up in the lake house, which made much more sense. He remembers falling asleep here, Tony must have woken up earlier and gotten out of bed... that made sense. He waited until his breathing was back to normal before heading downstairs. He froze at the bottom of the steps as he processed the sight in front of him.
Quentin Beck was sitting at the couch, the spot where Tony normally sat in, with Morgan on his lap.
“Ah Peter, nice of you to finally join us.”
not real, not real, not real, not real, not real-
“Get away from her” and despite know that this wasn’t real, Peter’s voice shook.
In response, Beck let out a hefty laugh, a look of pure delight taking over his face.
“You never learn, do you?” Peter’s six sense went haywire at the patronizing tone of his voice. “She’s already dead.”
Suddenly, the living room was transformed into the bridge from London, and Peter was in his Spiderman suit. Peter fell into a stance of defense, one that Tony has taught him years ago, trying to find Beck. Rather than the sight of Mysterio, he was faced with Morgan Stark’s dead body, blood and bruises showing a clear sign of struggle.
“Pepper is going to be absolutely devastated. Losing her husband and now her daughter.”
The atmosphere changes yet again, and this time he’s in the medical wing. Tony is lying on the hospital bed, but there is nothing attached to him. He was another dead body.
He meets Pepper’s red rimmed eyes as she lifts a gun to her head and pulls the trigger. The gunshot echoes in his ears and covers his scream.
“You’ve killed them all.”
Peter forces himself to turn away from Pepper and face the new voice. May is staring at him with a mixture or horror and hatred in her eyes, Happy stands right behind her.
“May, please, I- I didn’t mean to, I swear.” May shook her head, turning to leave.
“Ben would be disappointed in you.”
~~~
When Peter wakes up, he’s alone.
This time, Peter doesn’t check the time on the alarm clock. He jumps out of bed and runs to the bathroom, throwing up in the sink before letting out a sob.
not real, not real, not real-
Peter stares at his reflection like he did before. He looked completely broken with still heavy bags under his eyes despite just waking up. Suddenly, Tony’s voice echoed in his ears.
Break the mirror.
He lifts his trembling fist and punches the mirror with all of his strength. The glass shatters.
Then, all he feels is pain in his right hand. He lifts it and sees blood oozing down his fingers and staining the granite below him. Peter smiles and lets out a sigh of relief.
“Peter, what did you do?”
He turns and makes eye contact with a shocked looking Pepper. Morgan was standing right behind her with confusion taking over her face. Peter expects to feel some form of ease at the sight of them but instead he just feels numb. He focuses on the burning sensation of his hand.
“I broke the mirror” Peter explained.
Pepper examined the surroundings of the bathroom, taking note of the blood and vomit that was starting to mix in together. She turned to Morgan.
“I need you to do me a huge favor and get Daddy from the garage. Tell him to come upstairs and bring the first aid kit, okay?”
Morgan quickly glanced at Peter and nodded, silently turning to leave. Once Morgan was away from the bathroom, Pepper finally walked in and carefully stepped around the glass. She turned on the sink and gently grasped Peter’s wrist, moving his hand so it was directly under the now running faucet.
Then, Pepper pulled out tweezers from the bathroom cabinet. She situated Peter so he was sitting on the closed toilet seat. By the time Tony came with the first aid kit, she already had half of the glass out of his hand.
“What the hell happened?”
“I broke the mirror” Peter explained again. Pepper momentarily paused with the tweezers as Tony asked his next question
“And why exactly did you break the mirror?”
“You told me too.”
“I... told you too?” Peter was taken aback by Tony’s confusion.
He glanced down at the floor, just now fully processing the shattered glass scattered around the room. He looked at mirror itself only to see the entirety of it cracked. He shot up at the realization.
“I broke the mirror- oh my god, I broke the mirror, I am so sorry Mr. Stark, I wasn’t thinking clearly and- I just did it without thinking and I can pay for a new one, how much do mirrors cost?”
Pepper placed a hand on each of his shoulders and forced him to sit back down. Tony was now much closer than before, and both of them were staring at him with so much worry in their eyes. It reminded him of the time Peter broke his elbow in fourth grade, Ben and May looked at him the exact same way.
“I don’t care about the damn mirror. What I do care about is your hand, how does it feel?”
He looked down at the hand in question. Pepper had successfully taken all the glass shards out and was now wrapping it up with bandages.
“It doesn’t hurt too bad.” A blatant lie.
“Buddy, I can’t believe I have to say this, but you’re not allowed to punch mirrors. That’s what we have training rooms for.”
“I’m sorry- I won’t do it again, I promise. I’ll clean the glass from the floor, oh and the puke too! It’ll be gone before you know it.”
“You threw up?”
Pepper stood up, pushing the first aid kit away. “I’ll clean everything up, don’t worry about it, alright? Tony, will you take Peter somewhere else while I get everything situated.”
“Come on Pete, you heard the boss.” Peter lightly chuckled out of politeness, and followed Tony out of the bathroom, trying not to feel too guilty.
“Where’s May?” Peter asked once they were back in the bedroom.
“She had a morning work shift... remember?” He didn’t.
He didn’t remember events from the first nightmare either. But this had to be real, because the glass shattered just like Mr. Stark had said it would. He focused once more on the throbbing sensation of his hand, letting it ground him.
“Pete, what happened back there?”
He decided that the truth was probably the best way to go about this. “I had a nightmare.”
“Did I tell you to break the mirror in this nightmare?”
“Yeah- in one of them you did, you said to hit the mirror and if it shatters then it means it's real. The first time I tried it the mirror didn’t break so then I tried it again…” Peter pauses only to continue to ramble when Tony doesn’t respond right away.
“Mr. Stark I’m really sorry, I honestly wasn’t expecting the mirror to break like that, I promise I’ll-” Tony raised a hand, motioning him to stop and Peter immediately closed his mouth.
“God Pete, stop talking for a second, alright? You’re breaking my heart over here.”
Peter kept his mouth shut as Tony seemed to process everything. He started to play with the bandages on his hand that were now soaked in blood. Tony gently moved his fidgeting hand away and held it with his own.
“Hey Peter, what are your opinions on therapy?” For some reason he was surprised by the question.
“Oh, well uh- May and I considered finding a therapist after everything with Ben, but after doing some research we realized that it was too expensive.”
“Forget about the money, I’ll pay for it- do you think you would be willing to talk to a professional about all of this if we brought one in?” Peter shook his head.
“Mr. Stark that’s a crazy amount of money, and plus I don’t technically need a therapist, I can figure it out.
“Peter, inflicting pain on yourself is not figuring it out. We’re lucky you have your healing factor or that cut would be a lot more serious of an injury.” Peter’s gut twisted at that.
“I’m sorry.”
“Don’t be sorry, just don’t do it again, okay?”
“Okay...”
A beat of silence.
“Do you wanna talk about the dreams kiddo?”
“No, not really.” Sharing would only make Tony more concerned and he couldn’t allow that.
“I’m going to talk to May about setting you up with a therapist. They can come to the lake house and you can have private discussions together.” Peter felt his eyes widen at the mention of May.
“Do we have to tell May about all of this?”
“Peter, yes.”
“But it’s only going to-”
“I don’t care, she needs to know. We’ve all let this slide under the rug for much too long. Come on Pete, this paranoia isn’t healthy.” And much to Peter’s horror, he started crying.
Tony’s eyes softened as he brushed the tears away. The pad of his thumb was soft under his eyes. “I know I’m being harsh, I’m sorry kiddo, but I care about you far too much to let you go on like this.”
Peter nodded.
“How much sleep have you been getting?”
Peter shrugged.
“Peter.” There was warning in Tony’s voice.
“I’ve been getting a few hours, it’s all good.”
“I need an exact estimate.”
“Like… eight hours or so.”
“Eight hours a night?”
Silence.
“Eight hours a week?”
“I’m a teenager, I don’t need that much sleep anyway.” Tony rolled his eyes.
“That is complete bullshit and you know it.”
“Bullshit!”
Peter and Tony simultaneously turned to the new voice. Morgan was jumping up and down near the doorway.
“Morgan, don’t say that word, especially in front of Mom.”
Instead of agreeing, Morgan turned her attention to Peter. “Mommy said you accidentally hit the mirror with your hand, there was a really loud crash from the living room.”
“Yeah I did... I’m sorry if I scared you Morgan.”
“It’s okay! Mommy also said that your hand would heal fast because you have superpowers.” She dramatically whispered the word ‘superpowers’ like it was a huge secret. Peter didn’t have the heart to tell her that there was no longer a secret to keep.
“You know Morgan wasn’t the only one who was scared.” Peter turned back to Tony, who was staring at him with distraught.
“I didn’t mean to.”
“I know you didn’t, I’m just sorry it’s taken me this long to realize the gravity of this situation.”
Peter opened his mouth to respond, but Morgan was quick to interrupt, tugging on his blood stained shirt in urgency.
“Would you like me to kiss you hand? Whenever I get a booboo Daddy always gives me a kiss where it hurts and it makes me feel better.”
Peter let out a wet laugh, quickly wiping new tears with his good hand before Morgan noticed. “I would love a kiss, thank you.”
Morgan grabbed his bandaged hand and gave it a few quick pecks. She was not gentle in the slightest and he had to bite down a yelp when she squeezed his fingers, but he can’t say he didn’t feel better.
“Hey I think it worked.”
“Of course it worked” Morgan chided. This time it was Tony who laughed.
“Good job Morguana, why don’t you go to your bedroom and find a stuffed animal for Peter to hold. That makes you feel better when you’re sad.”
Morgan nodded and was out of the room before Peter could blink an eye. “Good idea Daddy, I’ll be back soon!” The moment Morgan left, Tony was back to serious.
“I need you to promise me you won’t do something like that again.”
“I already said I wouldn’t.”
“But I need more confirmation. I know how these things work, I’ve been in the superhero business for far too long now. It only excelates from here and I want to stop it from reaching its worst case scenario.” Peter tried not to think about what Tony was implying.
“Okay, I promise.” Tony offers a tight lipped smile.
“Good, and I promise to do whatever it takes to get you back on the right track.” Tony looked ready to say something else but Morgan ran back to the room before he could get the words out.
“Okay, do you want Mr. Otter or Dr. Porcupine?”
Peter debated his options for a brief period of time, causing Morgan to giggle. “I’ll take Mr. Otter.”
Morgan ran towards them and handed Peter the stuffed animal, he made sure to grab it with his good hand so to keep the blood away.
“Ah Mr. Otter, a great choice” Tony proclaimed. He then picked Morgan up and sat her on his leg. Peter was reminded of the nightmare, with Beck on the couch and Morgan on his lap. The visual made him physically shake.
“Mr. Stark?”
“Yeah kid?”
“I think I’d like to try therapy.” At that, Tony let out a genuine smile, and Peter knew he was making the right choice.