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Jaemin's love life sucks and Jisung can't bear to watch him fall apart and break into pieces every time Jaemin ends up in an unrequited love. His heart throbs in excruciating pain, similar to Jaemin's heart as if he could feel the older's heartbreak. Well, Jisung's feelings are highly influenced by Jaemin's emotions and if the older is happy, Jisung would be too.
Except that Jaemin only ever acts happy. He pretends to be the happy go-lucky person during school with their friends, not even showing the slightest sadness he is facing in the meantime. Nobody realises his facade, not even Jisung at first until he did notice it. The subtle change of expression, tone of voice and his aura.
People might think Jisung is overreacting and overthinking about it but he can't help it. He doesn't even know when he started to pay too much attention to every single thing about Jaemin. Every detail intrigues him, makes him ponder and worry in concern for Jisung is infatuated with Jaemin.
That is why people say only people in love can recognize another one in love. So, the first time Jisung realises Jaemin is in love, he tries to be happy for him and wanting to support him but it all ends up badly for Jaemin. Jisung's heart weeps for Jaemin when he falls for the wrong person–someone already in love, someone already in a relationship, someone so close that he would never try to ruin their relationship.
It pains Jisung to see Jaemin control himself, pretending everything was okay when he could see Jaemin's heart breaking down.
Jaemin comes to him one day. An excuse of a sleepover like the usual old days with bags of snacks and groceries to feed the younger one. Jisung lets him in willingly, taking the bags from him and getting praised for being so strong. His cheeks redden from the small compliment.
Jisung knows Jaemin is much more reserved than he looks like. He never tells a lot of himself even to him when everyone in their group of friends know about Jaemin's love for the youngest. Jisung hated it at first. Being babied and spoiled with affection, kisses, skinship that he would rather not be doing but it's Jaemin.
It's because it's Jaemin that Jisung is okay with it.
So, when Jaemin's usual warm and tight hugs become looser and unfamiliar, Jisung knows. Jaemin distances himself a bit during the movie, hoping Jisung doesn't notice but he does, he always does even when nobody knows, Jisung does.
How couldn't he?
Jisung maybe a bit slower and zones out a little bit too much but he notices the small details, especially when it comes to Jaemin. Anything if it concerns his Jaemin hyung.
"Jisung-ah," Jaemin's voice sounded weak and it pained him. "I don't know why I'm like this but it hurts. My heart hurts so much,"
Hyung, please.
"I'm sorry you had to listen to us fighting. You didn't need to know about that."
Hyung, just stop. You're hurting yourself.
"I don't want to be telling you this but being in love isn't as beautiful as people make it seem to be. When two people are in love, there's bound to be a third person whose heart gets broken. It's foolish of me, I know."
Hyung, stop it. Please.
"So, Jisung," Jaemin turns to face him, knees already up to his chest and his eyes glistened with tears. "Forget it, please. For this hyung's sake."
Jisung doesn't reply but instead does the one thing he wanted to do ever since Jaemin stepped inside his home. He hugs Jaemin. He hugs him the tightest he could, hoping deep in his heart Jaemin is slightly comforted by his hug like Jaemin usually does to him to cheer him up.
Jaemin melts into Jisung's arms, chuckling as if remembering something funny and wraps his arms around him. "You've grown, huh?"
"I did, hyung. I grew up, I'm even bigger than you. I'm taller and I could easily hug you like this. At this rate, you'll only reach my shoulders." Jisung jokes and Jaemin laughs, tightening his hold. "So, it's okay, hyung. I grew up, I know lots of things now. I'm not dumb, I can see and think. I don't know why you're trying to convince me to stay innocent but I'm not doing that."
Jaemin is silent, only his soft breathing were heard.
"They're stupid for doing that to you. You definitely don't deserve to be treated that way. If they don't like you, they should've rejected you from the start and not lead you on, treating you like a fool. You should've known better, hyung. You always do but when it comes to your heart, you never want to risk hurting others. Why? Why can't you be selfish for once and put yourself first?"
Jaemin stiffens in Jisung's arms, hands clutching on Jisung's sleeves.
"Why do you find the need to hurt yourself over and over? Why can't you get over them? Why can't you forget them? There's so many people out there who love you and will love you the way you deserve to, yet you come back to them and let them cut you open, hurting you over and over again. Jaemin hyung,"
Jisung slowly lets go of Jaemin even if the latter was reluctant and he finds out the reason seconds later when he stares into Jaemin's eyes full of tears and his cheeks stained with them. Jisung moves to cup Jaemin's face in his hands, wiping his tears with the pad of his thumbs.
"I hope for you to be happy,"
Not crying over stupid boys.
"I want you to do what you tell others to,"
Smile, because everything would be okay.
"I need you to realise, hyung."
I love you.
"Don't let others hurt you this way,"
You don't deserve this.
"You don't need to act tough like you're not hurting,"
When I know your heart is too big, your love is overflowing.
"You can depend on others too,"
Depend on me.
"I'm not the small Jisung anymore, hyung. I've grown and even if I'm a coward, I won't let others hurt you."
Because that hurts me more. Seeing you in pain.
"Cry, it's okay to cry. Just cry, hyung. Nobody's here," Jisung repeats it like a mantra, making Jaemin break down into more tears as his hands turned white from balling them up too long.
Jaemin cries and cries like he's never cried, holding onto Jisung like his life depended. Burying his head into Jisung's chest, saying something that he doesn't want the younger to see his ugly crying face. Jisung smiles at that. He could never find Jaemin ugly.
Jisung doesn't let go of Jaemin, even when his cries quieted down and his sniffles turn into soft snores. He pulls Jaemin even closer, ignoring the pain and numbness of his legs and body because to him, only Jaemin matters. He places a tender kiss on the crown of Jaemin's head, reminding him that even if the world is against Jaemin, Jisung would still be by his side.
And for once, Jaemin finds himself sleeping in solace, the burden in his heart decreasing and his body felt light. He snuggles in closer, loving Jisung's warmth.
"Say goodbye to your tears now, I'll try to protect your smile forever."