Work Text:
There is something to be said about the beauty of a park during the dying breaths of summer.
Xie Lian doesn’t spend much time at the park – not nearly as much as he should for somebody who lives less than five minutes away from it. When he does, it’s usually to meet other people, so he doesn’t get to appreciate it entirely.
He isn’t sure what prompts him to go, but he does, taking Ruoye with him so she can get a few rays of sunlight from somewhere other than her windowsill perch.
The white-haired cat lounges in the grass at Xie Lian’s feet, rolling around gleefully. Xie Lian can’t help but smile at her as he tucks his knees under himself and opens his sketchbook.
Might as well practice still life while I’m out here, Xie Lian reasons.
He starts by drawing the birds flitting between the tree branches, and then clouds that hang lazily in the sky and the little flowers still clinging to life hidden in between cracks of the pavement. He doesn’t bother paying too much attention to detail, just sketching them as he sees them.
Naturally, Xie Lian draws anything that catches his eye, so when he sees the man dressed in red leaning against a tree looking like he’s walked straight out of a painting, Xie Lian finds himself drawing him, too.
Xie Lian can’t help but let his gaze linger on the man in between glances, intrigued by the length of his ink-black hair and the soft smile that lingers on his lips. Something about him is familiar, but Xie Lian can’t put his finger on what.
The man’s gaze is on the playground in front of him, and Xie Lian’s suspicions of him being a father are confirmed true as a small child bounces over to the man and extends something towards him proudly. Xie Lian can’t hide his smile as the man crouches down to admire his offering and the child eagerly dumps a pile of sand into his father’s hands.
Eyes darting between the man and his sketchbook, Xie Lian sketches a rough snapshot of the child holding his hands out towards his father. He becomes quickly engrossed in making sure he’s drawing the angle of his shoulders and sweep of his hair exactly the way it appears, and because of this, he doesn’t notice somebody approaching until there’s a tug on the leg of his pants.
Xie Lian raises his gaze and lets out a yelp of surprise as he finds himself face-to-face with the subjects of his drawing. He quickly shuts the sketchbook, although judging by the man’s bemused smile that only grows wider at his reaction that it’s far too late to hide it.
“Gege,” the child says, tugging on Xie Lian’s pant leg again and ignoring his surprise. “Do you like flowers?”
Xie Lian glances at the child’s father helplessly. The man just raises an eyebrow at him, as if to say, well, do you? and Xie Lian abruptly gets the feeling he’s being laughed at.
“I do,” Xie Lian replies, looking back to the child.
Grinning widely, the boy turns to glance at his father and then back to Xie Lian at the man’s nod of encouragement, extending a hand towards Xie Lian and uncurling it to reveal a fistful of crumpled daisies.
“I picked these for gege,” he says matter-of-factly. “I saw him looking at the flowers.”
Even in his embarrassment, Xie Lian can’t help but be endeared. He holds out a hand to accept the destroyed flowers and the child’s eyes light up as he quickly stuffs them into Xie Lian’s open palm.
“I can get more for gege!” The child suddenly exclaims and then bolts off, presumably to find more flowers. Xie Lian can’t help but laugh softly at his antics.
“Sorry to bother you,” the boy’s father finally speaks, his voice gentle but amused. “A-Ming likes to give strangers gifts. He seems to really like you – and your cat. He wouldn’t stop talking about it, but he’s too scared to ask to pet it.”
Xie Lian blinks, glancing down at Ruoye, who looks back up at him from where she lays at her feet. Her white fur is stained green from rolling in the grass, and she has stray leaves caught in her harness. The idea of anyone being scared of her makes Xie Lian chuckle under his breath.
“It’s not a bother,” he says as he looks back up at the man. “It’s very sweet of him. Are you his father, then?”
The man smiles, tilting his head at Xie Lian curiously, and Xie Lian realizes belatedly that’s really none of his business. Embarrassment floods his cheeks and he opens his mouth to apologize before the man cuts him off.
“I am. I adopted him when he was very young,” he explains. “To me, though, he might as well be my own flesh and blood.”
Xie Lian nods, grateful that the man didn’t think he was weird for asking such a sudden personal question. He’s surprised to hear that A-Ming is adopted, considering his likeness to the man in front of him, but perhaps there’s more to it than there appears on the surface.
Still, Xie Lian can’t shake the feeling that the man in front of him is very familiar. The cock of his eyebrow and playfulness of his smile is so familiar it makes Xie Lian’s head hurt the harder he tries to place a name to it.
“I’m sorry to ask this out of nowhere, but have I met you?” he blurts out.
The man in front of him raises a brow curiously, and Xie Lian feels himself grow hot under his scrutinizing gaze even as he stands his ground. He knows he’s seen him somewhere before –
“Ah, I should have introduced myself properly,” the man says after a pause. “My name is Hua Cheng, but perhaps gege knows me better as San Lang.”
San Lang.
Suddenly everything falls into place and Xie Lian’s eyes blow wide as he finally connects the dots between the man in front of him and the one he used to know. Hua Cheng watches his expression change with a quirk of his lips, like he’s rather satisfied with himself for shocking Xie Lian so thoroughly.
“So gege does remember me after all,” Hua Cheng says with a light laugh. “I suppose it’s an honor, even if we didn’t particularly part on the best of terms back then.”
It’s a wild understatement, and just at the mention of it, Xie Lian wants to bury himself six feet under ground and never resurface again.
How exactly do you apologize to somebody for making out with them at a party and then ghosting them for the next five years? Especially when that person had been your closest and most dear friend before said making out?
You don’t, Xie Lian thinks as he offers a very weak apologetic smile. You act like it never happened.
Some things – some things are hard to explain in the middle of a park. Thankfully, Hua Cheng doesn’t press.
“I see you’re still drawing.” He gestures to the discarded sketchbook. “Did you go professional?”
“About as professional as one can get when they work two jobs,” Xie Lian replies miserably, relieved at the change of subject. “But I do manage to sell a few pieces here and there. What about you? Are you still interested in becoming a teacher?”
“Not interested. Am,” Hua Cheng says, looking rather proud of himself. “It’s my second year. I can’t say it’s been nothing but sunshine and rainbows, but I like working with the children.”
As if on cue, A-Ming bounds back to them, this time overflowing with picked flowers. Xie Lian almost feels bad for the mass deforestation he’s indirectly caused as A-Ming shoves them into Xie Lian’s arms proudly.
“I picked all of the flowers for gege,” A-Ming says, puffing his chest out. “Baba said gege likes white flowers the most, so I got lots of them.”
“Thank you, A-Ming,” Xie Lian says, trying hard not to smile as he pulls a flower out of the boy’s wild hair. “You’re very kind. Did you want to say hello to Ruoye?”
In response to hearing her name, Ruoye raises her head with a chirp, and A-Ming’s eyes stretch wide as he nods furiously. Xie Lian bends down to pick her up, and A-Ming strokes her fur gently, snatching his hand back as she turns her head to him with interest.
“It’s okay, she doesn’t bite.” Xie Lian runs his hand through her fur to demonstrate, scratching under her chin. “She especially likes to be pet between her ears or under her chin.”
A-Ming nods again, once again moving forward to pet her with increasing courage until Ruoye is purring and rubbing her chin against his hand happily.
“She likes you,” Xie Lian says, earning a pleased giggle from A-Ming.
Hua Cheng laughs quietly, and Xie Lian glances up at him. He can’t help smiling back, not only at the oddness of the entire situation but also because just being near Hua Cheng makes something in his chest feel light and bubbly and warm.
The moment is interrupted by the sound of a cellphone ringing. Hua Cheng reaches into his pocket and checks the caller ID before his expression turns sour.
“Could I bother gege to stay with A-Ming for a bit?” Hua Cheng asks as he glances at Xie Lian apologetically. “It’ll only take a few minutes.”
“Of course,” Xie Lian replies without hesitation, and Hua Cheng smiles at him gratefully before stepping away to answer the phone.
Xie Lian can’t help but be worried – the expression on Hua Cheng’s face was like ice in comparison to what it was moments before it. He can only hope that it’s nothing too serious, even if he doesn’t have much of a place to worry for Hua Cheng when he all but abandoned him for the last five years.
“A-Ming, do you know how to make flower crowns?” Xie Lian turns his attention back to the boy sitting at his feet playing with his collected flowers. “We can make one for your baba to surprise him.”
A-Ming looks up at him with sparkling eyes. “Okay!”
Xie Lian reaches down to ruffle his hair playfully before sliding off the bench to sit beside him. Together, they work to form a rather misshapen and sad-looking flower crown, but the way A-Ming holds it out to Xie Lian like it’s the proudest work of his life makes it well-worth the effort.
“This one’s for gege,” A-Ming says decidedly. “A-Ming will make one for baba to match.”
“Okay,” Xie Lian agrees. “Then I’ll also make one for A-Ming?”
A-Ming mouth parts in surprise, like he isn’t expecting to get one of his own just like the adults, and he nods eagerly. Xie Lian finishes his own flower crown rather quickly, making sure it’s smaller so that it fits A-Ming better, and then spends the rest of the time helping A-Ming when he makes mistakes in his own.
Every so often, Xie Lian glances up at Hua Cheng. The other man paces underneath a tree just out of earshot, but his expression is so cold it sends a chill down Xie Lian’s spine even from a distance. Just who on earth could earn such an expression from San Lang, he thinks, before deciding it’s not his place to ask and turning his attention back to the flower crowns.
They finish weaving in the final flower when Hua Cheng returns, smiling casually as if the icy expression he wore before had never been there in the first place.
“Baba!” A-Ming stands and runs over to greet his father. “Me and gege made you a flower crown!”
Hua Cheng grins at him, crouching down and bowing his head so that A-Ming can balance the flower crown there carefully. A-Ming claps at his own work as Hua Cheng raises his head again, flower crown slightly crooked.
“How do I look?” Hua Cheng’s gaze flicks towards Xie Lian’s playfully.
“Like a prince,” Xie Lian replies earnestly, biting back a smile at his raised brow.
“Gege, put my flower crown on!” A-Ming returns to Xie Lian and sits on his knees as still as a statue as Xie Lian obediently places the flower crown onto his head. “And now baba can put on gege’s!”
Xie Lian blinks in surprise, turning his head. Hua Cheng seems about as shocked as he is, but he recovers quickly, accepting the flower crown that A-Ming hands to him and sitting so he’s eye-level Xie Lian. His uncovered eye sparkles playfully.
“If I may do the honors,” Hua Cheng says with mock grandeur.
Xie Lian flushes, ducking his head to allow Hua Cheng to place the wilted flower crown onto his head. When he raises it again, Hua Cheng is gazing at him with a curious smile.
“It’s a bit crooked, I think,” Hua Cheng says after looking at him for a bit. “Don’t you agree, A-Ming?”
“Mm!” A-Ming nods along furiously.
Xie Lian holds his breath Hua Cheng reaches out again and carefully fixes the flower crown. Hua Cheng hesitates, seeming conflicted, before gently brushing a stray lock of hair behind Xie Lian’s ear, as gentle as if he were handling glass. His hand lingers against Xie Lian’s cheek for a bit longer than necessary, and up close like this, Xie Lian can see the way Hua Cheng’s eyes are blown wide as he stares at him.
For a moment, Xie Lian feels no different from when he did five years ago, pressed up against a bathroom door with his legs around Hua Cheng’s waist and his fingers in his hair and tongue in his mouth. The memory makes his head spin.
Judging by the way Hua Cheng’s breath catches, he’s not the only one who remembers.
The moment is interrupted by a bout of excited applause from A-Ming. Hua Cheng leans back and clears his throat, and A-Ming eagerly climbs into his lap and loops his arms around his father’s neck to hug him tightly.
Stupid, Xie Lian berates himself as he shakes himself. Things aren’t the same as they were. After all, San Lang even has a son now. I shouldn’t be having these thoughts about him.
Somehow, that does little to comfort him.
“Ah, you have so much grass all over you, A-Ming!” Hua Cheng, brushing what he can off A-Ming’s clothes. “And this is your nice shirt, too. Didn’t you promise you wouldn’t get it messy?”
“It was an accident!” A-Ming protests, burying his face in Hua Cheng’s neck. “A-Ming is sorry!”
“I’m sure A-Ming is.” Hua Cheng laughs, tugging at the end of A-Ming’s hair. “Why don’t you thank this gege for helping you make flower crowns and letting you pet miss Ruoye?”
A-Ming lifts his head to blink at Xie Lian with wide eyes, as if suddenly remembering something. He quickly clambers back out of Hua Cheng’s lap and promptly into Xie Lian’s, wrapping his arms around his neck and squeezing him tightly. Xie Lian’s eyes widen in surprise, even as he gently hugs A-Ming back.
“I don’t want to leave gege!” A-Ming wails. “We have to take gege with us!”
Xie Lian blinks, and when he meets Hua Cheng’s gaze, the other man looks just as stunned as him. The expression on Hua Cheng’s face is so bewildered that it makes laughter bubble up in Xie Lian’s chest, and before he can stifle it he dissolves into helpless giggles, gently pulling A-Ming off of his neck and pinching his nose playfully. A-Ming gazes at him with wide eyes, bottom lip trembling miserably.
“I’ll miss you, too, A-Ming,” Xie Lian says, stifling another giggle at his expression. “But I can’t go with you. I have to go to work soon.”
A-Ming pouts, clenching his hands into fists. “No work! Only stay with A-Ming and baba.”
“Be reasonable, A-Ming,” Hua Cheng chides as he leans forward to pull the boy back into his own lap. “Gege has his own life. Why don’t you invite him to your school play next week instead?”
A-Ming blinks before craning his neck to look at his father with wide eyes. “Can gege really come?”
“Yes, if you ask him first, silly.”
Two wide brown eyes turn back to Xie Lian. “Does gege want to come to my school play?”
“I’d love to,” Xie Lian says with a soft laugh. “When is it?”
“I can send you the details over text,” Hua Cheng offers. “Is gege’s phone number still the same?”
“Yes,” Xie Lian replies. “Heavens know I don’t understand technology enough to upgrade to anything fancier.”
Xie Lian realizes his mistake a beat too late when a shadow passes over Hua Cheng’s expression – oh. There goes his excuse for ignoring the texts Hua Cheng sent him over the last few years. Xie Lian doesn’t know whether to laugh or cry at his own stupidity.
Fortunately, Hua Cheng doesn’t push the subject. He smiles easily, as if everything is forgiven, before standing and lifting up A-Ming with him, who squeals and clings to his shoulders like a baby koala.
“Then, I’ll be in contact.” Hua Cheng smiles. It lacks its usual brightness. “It was good to see you again, gege.”
Xie Lian feels like he’s been punched through the chest. He gives a feeble smile in return, not quite meeting Hua Cheng’s eyes.
“It was good to see you as well, San Lang,” he says.
With that, Hua Cheng turns to leave. A-Ming waves at Xie Lian, peering over his father’s shoulder with wide brown eyes. Even from here, Xie Lian can see how tightly drawn Hua Cheng’s shoulders are, and the sight of it makes his stomach twist with guilt.
“San Lang!”
Hua Cheng pauses at the sound of his name being called. He glances over his shoulder at Xie Lian quizzically, and Xie Lian immediately feels himself flush under the weight of his gaze. What the hell did I suddenly call out to him like that for?
“Thank you,” Xie Lian finally says.
Hua Cheng’s brows furrow. “What for?”
For giving me another chance.
“Nothing in particular!” Xie Lian suddenly wishes he could crawl underground again. “J-Just. Thank you! For everything.”
Hua Cheng gazes at him curiously for a moment before smiling, and the sight of it instantly eases Xie Lian’s nerves. While Hua Cheng doesn’t laugh out loud, Xie Lian can see his shoulders shake a bit, and he much prefers being laughed at to being treated stiffly.
“Any time, gege,” Hua Cheng replies. “Don’t be a stranger.”
Xie Lian presses his lips together to keep from grinning. “I won’t.”
“Promise?”
Something in his voice seems like a challenge, and Xie Lian can’t help but rise up to meet it. “Promise.”
“Promise!” A-Ming echoes cheerfully.
Hua Cheng laughs out loud then, hefting A-Ming up and casting Xie Lian once last glance over his shoulder. For a moment Xie Lian thinks he’s going to say something else, but then he just shakes his head with a small smile and leaves.
If we like each other than we shall continue to meet, Hua Cheng’s voice echoes in his head, a memory from years before. If we don’t, then we shall part. There’s no banquet in the world that doesn’t come to an end.
For some reason, Xie Lian spends the rest of the day struggling not to smile.
Just because one banquet has ended doesn’t mean another can’t begin, San Lang.