Chapter Text
Yoongi still doesn’t understand how he ended up cuddling both Hueningkai and Jeongguk that night.
He has never been the touchy type, not when it comes to most people. To others, those that are not Jeongguk (really), the vampire is reserved. He’s quiet and calm. He’s distant and cold. He’s a rock. He’s winter and ice and everything that is not warm. He doesn’t show. He’s a statue. He doesn’t tell. He’s mute.
But he does. More frequently than what anybody would expect.
Yoongi likes to hold and grab. He enjoys feeling the warmth his body lacks, looks for it in the man that sleeps by his side every time the stars show up. But it’s often in the privacy that the roof above him provides. Some things are meant to be kept private, including the intimate nature of his bond with Jeongguk.
To the world, Yoongi is a pale creature that doesn’t like to go outside. To his boyfriend, he’s a soft and gentle bat that likes to stay inside because he gets to hug and kiss the one human he actually likes. He might argue and claim to despise physical contact, but he enjoys it more than anything in this strange world. It’s embarrassing. He turns pink just by thinking about it.
Because of this, the act of cuddling is not what is scandalising Yoongi at the moment. It’s the fact that he is very much liking it, and feeling comfortably safe between these two other bodies, what is making him freak out. For a dangerous and terrifying second, he feels he could get used to this; the closest thing to family he has had in years...
It’s common for nearly turned vampires to be clingy. Most need the attention, the extra care and protection that older vampires can provide. They seek comfort and safety, a warm blanket in the middle of stormy dreams. It’s natural, some argue. It’s the human that remains behind the pointy fangs, Yoongi likes to think.
“This is nice,” Jeongguk teases, because he knows how to read Yoongi despite not possessing the ability to read minds. He is resting his head on the vampire’s left shoulder. Kai’s head is on the right one. They’re both glued to him. Jeongguk is stroking his stomach with one of his thumbs (like any other night) and Kai is hugging his arm, grasping it almost like a baby that gives his first handshake to his mum. His eyes are wild. Yoongi doesn’t need to look at him to know. He can feel them, jumping between Jeongguk and him. They are as round as plates, he bets, “Cosy.”
The vampire grunts. Hueningkai remains silent. His grip on Yoongi’s arm, however, tightens.
It’s late. Not that late. Maybe close to 1 am, Yoongi guesses by the position of the moon. He can see it from his window, shining in a sea of dark clouds and eerie sights. They forgot to draw the curtains when they climbed to the bed. But no one feels like moving now. So open they shall remain, the elder thinks. The other two agree. They’re comfortable. Yoongi refuses to admit it, but he does feel nice.
Vampires are nocturnal. They’re active during the nighttime, like owls (and, well, bats). Due to this, it is quite odd for any of them to be found lying down once the sun goes down. Most would be hunting down prey at this time of the evening. But that's not the case with Yoongi anyway. He doesn't drink blood (not directly from humans, that is).
"Cosy," Yoongi repeats, not agreeing nor disagreeing. Jeongguk chuckles. He looks through the window, staring at the moon.
Unlike popular belief, the sun doesn’t kill vampires. They can survive in the daylight. They don’t disintegrate or spark like a piece of melted coal. Their bodies are designed differently. They just get sleepy. And if they don’t sleep, they begin to feel groggy, slow. In Yoongi’s case, grumpy too.
The older vampire doesn’t sleep at night. His body is not comfortable with that. He might take a nap in the evening but only when he’s too tired and hasn’t drunk blood in a while. However, most of the time, when he does find himself in bed when the stars are up, he’s just there to make Jeongguk some company.
They like to cuddle. Yoongi holds his boyfriend every night until he has fallen asleep and light snores fill the vacancies in the air. After this, he might decide to stay in bed a little longer, soaking in the warmth that Jeongguk’s body (alive and pulsing) produces next to him. He might use his phone (vampires need to constantly adapt to the new times) or grab his laptop to do some work in bed. He produces, works for a label owned by a woman married to a vampire. It’s a safe environment for Yoongi, and he gets to have autonomy over his work. Most nights, he works from home. But there are times when he will visit his studio and lock himself in there until Jeongguk shows up and drags him back home.
But in the nights he doesn’t have to go to work, Yoongi carries out the chores Jeongguk assigned him for the weak. He cleans the apartment, does some laundry, fixes anything that is broken and goes shopping for blood at hospitals where others like him work. Vampires need to make connections. This is how they survive in the modern world, in jungles made of concrete where not even the most ancient secrets are safe. They live in an era where privacy is virtually non-existent. Information travels faster than light. Vampires can only survive in packs, clans or families…
Yoongi is a strange bat. He doesn’t belong anywhere. He knows people. He has friends. He has many connections. But he doesn’t have a family of his own. He used to, though. But they’re all gone now, taken away by time and wars.
He never bothered to try to join a new group. Too much trouble, too much pain. He likes solitude, it’s an old friend. Loneliness is something not even the dead can escape; he used to say.
But, after a few years trapped in this mindset, he met Jeongguk. Everything changed after that, just like it happens in movies and fiction. Jeongguk made him believe again in that something he once lost. Jeongguk made him want to try again.
And, now, Yoongi might have a new chance. But he’s scared. Afraid of ruining something delicate, as fragile as the wings of butterflies or dried leaves. He’s scared of being left alone again, it’s what his brain is trying to tell him as he lays there, motionless. His mind races. The pulse he doesn't have, too.
“How are you doing, Kai?” Jeongguk’s voice pulls him out of his thoughts. He’s looking at the kid, smiling gently, because he’s good with young people. Jeongguk knows how to talk to them, how to take care of humans and those who used to be human. It’s one of the things that first drew Yoongi to him.
“Good, I think,” the young vampire responds. He’s clean now. Jeongguk urged him to the bathroom as soon as he finished playing that video game in the living room. He had to borrow some clothes from Jeongguk, who’s taller and likes to wear oversized shirts and sweaters. They fit Kai quite well. He’s being hugged by a long-sleeved and sweatpants. If it weren’t for the fangs poking his lip, he would look like any other teenager at a sleep-over at his older brother’s place. A pang of sadness hits Yoongi. He tries to ignore it, “Cuddling feels good.”
“Right?” Jeongguk laughs. Yoongi feels Jeongguk’s breath tickling his collarbone. It warms him up, “Do you also agree, hyung?”
“It’s okay,” Yoongi slurs. He keeps his eyes glued to the ceiling. It’s white, smooth. He notices a small stain and wonders what it might be. Jeongguk laughs again.
“He likes it. He pretends he doesn’t but he’s loving it,” he tells Kai. They’re looking at each other with heavy eyes. Baby vampires take a while to adjust to their new biological clock. It’s similar to the experience of a traveller with jet lag. They try to stay up when they’re supposed to be in bed. It’s tough. Yoongi still remembers his own transition period. It felt like trying to swim in a lake made of souls that only wanted to drown him. The mermaids of the after-life, “Yoongi hyung is very kind. He’s a gentle vampire. He might look scary but he wouldn’t hurt a fly. He adores cuddles and kisses. You should see his face when someone holds his hand–”
The elder clears his throat. Jeongguk shuts up. A grin comes to rest on his mouth. The older vampire glows like a neon sign.
“You two should sleep.”
Jeongguk laughs, hard and clear. It’s the type of sound that has the power of clearing skies. Kai, on the other hand, smiles softly and begins to close his eyes. Yoongi sees him from the corner of his eye. He looks like an exhausted puppy after a day of exercise.
“Alright. It’s getting late, anyway,” Jeongguk yawns.
He places a kiss on Yoongi’s cheek. Yoongi, in return, turns his head to the side and brushes his lips against his boyfriend’s mouth. His lips taste like sugar and shea butter. They have honey’s texture. Jeongguk giggles, so, so quietly, and pecks him again (and again). They laugh. The vampire shakes his head.
“Sleep,” he says. Their foreheads bump and Jeongguk kisses the tip of his nose. He laughs with his eyes, caresses Yoongi with his thumbs, “The kid already passed out.”
Indeed, he has. His grip on Yoongi’s arm is not as tight anymore. He can now move it around without having it pulled and choked by the younger vampire. He feels himself relaxing a little. Jeongguk smiles and moves his lips, down; connects them to Yoongi’s neck.
“He’s cute,” Jeongguk murmurs against the elder’s skin, on top of his vein, barely circulating the thick blood left in his body. He yawns again and curls next to Yoongi. He makes himself small, “I feel so bad for him, hyung. He shouldn’t have been bitten. He’s so young. Not even an adult…”
After Kai’s shower, the three of them sat in the living room to converse. Jeongguk managed to make the atmosphere comfortable. Made it feel casual, allowed him to talk freely and trust. As a result, the young boy told them quite a lot, enough to help the older men to assess the situation. Enough to further shatter Jeongguk’s heart and feed the monster growing inside Yoongi’s stomach.
Hueningkai happens to be an orphan. He has been living in the same orphanage for most of his life, occasionally being thrown from one foster home to the next as if he was made of rugs. Many couples tried to take him in, he told them while fidgeting with the hem of Jeongguk’s shirt. Many tried to give him a roof. But nothing he ever did worked quite right. He always returned to the place where he was originally abandoned, like an unwanted animal.
Listening to Kai talk about himself in this way made something in Yoongi break. He can still feel. He is fond of emotions, actually. But, tonight, he couldn’t bring himself to cherish the sadness that started to run through his ancient veins.
Yoongi is compassionate, empathetic. He’s unique among his kind. He’s a little scary, a little odd. Jeongguk tells him that’s the reason he’s so in love.
Despite not having a concrete place to belong, Kai says that he still tried to blend in with the people around him. He goes to school, has friends, pretends to be just like the rest and tries to excel in his studies. That is his only chance to escape, Yoongi knows. It was the only road for him, too.
Hueningkai also told them about what happened earlier, about the bite. Making himself smaller and hugging his legs, he told them about the vampire that marked him and turned him into what he now is.
He pretended to be Kai’s friend. He lied and convinced everybody of the identity he had adopted. In short, he was betrayed, forced to believe in a fantasy. It makes Yoongi’s coagulated blood boil.
“What should we do with him?” the elder asks now, gently, in a whisper. He lifts his hand and touches Jeongguk’s face with the back of his fingers. It’s a little caress. It feels like the first raindrops that fall to announce the arrival of a larger storm.
“We can’t leave him alone,” Jeongguk says, kissing Yoongi’s fingertips when he begins to trace the shape of his lips.
“I know. And I’m not planning on abandoning him either. But I’m not sure if I’ll be able to take care of him.”
“Why’s that?” Jeongguk looks surprised. He leans back, stares at Yoongi’s face. His eyes widen a little, they glimmer like lips covered in gloss, “You’ve practised with me.”
Yoongi smiles.
“It’s not the same. I would have to train him on how to become a proper vampire, too. And I don’t know if I would be able to do that,” the vampire sighs. Jeongguk comforts him by kissing his cheek, then his nose and lastly his eyelids, “What if I’m a terrible teacher?”
“I think you would be a great teacher,” Jeongguk says. His hands are tangled in the vampire’s hair. He pets and pulls lightly, how Yoongi likes it. On the other side of the bed, Kai continues sleeping.
“What if I mess up?”
“You won’t,” Jeongguk promises, “But if you do, who cares? Both of you will learn something anyway. Practice makes perfect, right?”
The vampire smiles wider.
“You are…” he chuckles, bringing his boyfriend even closer and planting a little kiss on his mouth. Jeongguk parts his lips and accepts the gift, in hopes it’ll bloom in the garden Yoongi has given him through the years. He smiles, “incredibly human.”
“Thanks. I try my best to be one,” the young man bites his tongue in attempts to not make too much noise. He doesn’t want to wake up the kid next to them, “Don’t be too harsh on yourself, hyung. You’re perfect the way you are.”
“I’m far from perfect.”
“You’re to me,” Jeongguk declares. A moment later, he yawns and places his head back on the vampire’s shoulder, preparing himself to sleep, “I can’t imagine myself being with someone else. You’re everything I need and ever wanted in a partner.”
“Hmm. Does that include the part of me drinking your blood when I haven’t had a meal in days?” Yoongi teases him, receiving a giggle from the young man.
“Especially that part, hyung. You know the effect it has on me,” he laughs and pecks Yoongi’s skin, just where his neck meets his ear. It sends pleasant shivers down Yoongi’s spine, “But more on that some other night. Maybe when we’re alone,” he says, sighing (pleased) and intertwining his fingers with Yoongi’s. He’s laughing. He’s playful. Yoongi has to remind himself that there’s a kid in the room, trying to fight the urge of crawling over Jeongguk, “Goodnight, hyung.”
“Rest well, Gguk.”
•
In the end, Yoongi legally adopts Hueningkai. He gets help from his label, one of the lawyers (named Hoseok, a very cheerful and bright vampire) aiding him to sort out the mountain of papers required to be filled. Just looking at all the documents gives the vampire a headache. He doesn’t understand how Hoseok manages to organise them and fill the appropriate information the orphanage demands from him.
Bureaucracy is one of the things Yoongi doesn’t miss from his human life.
The vampire gets asked a few (many) questions the day he first visits the orphanage. The building is not different from what he has seen in movies. It’s packed, a little messy and loud; stained with the colours and songs of youth. He sees children looking out of their rooms’ windows as Yoongi walks past them, curious and conspiring. It almost feels like a prison. Yoongi almost feels like their newest target, fresh meat or whatever they call it.
When he’s seated on a worn off chair (Kai and Hoseok next to him), he gets interrogated just like a criminal. He’s asked about his intentions with Hueningkai. He is asked why a relatively young man (Hoseok played with his identification and made him 35) and single (again, Hoseok’s idea as society is far from equal) wants to adopt a teenager instead of someone younger.
“I used to have a son. I had him when I was very young, at 18. But he passed away, along with his mum, in a deadly transit accident a few years ago…” he tells the story Hoseok carefully crafted for him, like a writer stuck in his den motivated to create the next modern classic. It’s emotional, a common misfortune but unique for every victim. The woman in charge of their adoption case softens with this tale, “He would have been Kai’s age if he was still… here, with me. I see a lot of him in this young man. He reminds me so much of my precious son, you see. That is why I wish to adopt him...”
That’s all it takes to make the worker trust him, and maybe some of Yoongi’s natural charms. Vampires are skilful in the art of alluring humans. They are charming, beautiful distractions. They are natural hunters, have many ways of attracting food to their table...
Yoongi doesn’t know how adoptions work. Most of his knowledge about the subject comes from movies and other similar tales. That’s why he’s grateful for Hoseok, who falsified all of his documents for a good cause (he would like to argue) and helped him to complete the adoption process that same day.
Shortly, the three of them return to Yoongi’s apartment. The older vampires clean up the spare room (which hadn’t seen the light of day in forever) and watch as Kai settles in. His eyes are wide as he looks around the space he is being offered. It’s nothing out of the ordinary, Yoongi thinks as he watches the boy opening his closet and peeking inside. But it’s more than what he has ever had, Kai tells him after he stores the bag (he had been carrying) inside and slides the closet’s door shut.
Yoongi doesn’t suppress the little happiness he feels when Kai faces him and expresses his gratitude. A grin sits on his lips.
•
Falling into a new routine doesn’t happen to be an arduous task. Yoongi thought it would be hard, to live with two people rather than just one. But it’s not bad.
The first few weeks do feel a little strange, foreign. Kai still struggles with his sleep schedule and often falls asleep next to Jeongguk at night. He’s still clingy, perhaps even more than before (as he begins to trust and find comfort in his new house). But Jeongguk is right. Yoongi quite likes that.
He begins to train Kai as soon as he becomes, in legal humane terms, his son. He still can’t wrap his head around the idea of becoming a parent, so he tells the young boy to call him “Hyung.” Kai complies. He’s obedient. Not in the way someone afraid is. He’s polite, a good kid, as far as Yoongi has seen.
Training, as a result, doesn't feel like hell. The young vampire is willing to learn, try to understand his new body and adapt to his new life. It’s been a somewhat smooth process. Kai seems to be enjoying his new amplified strength among his other new abilities. He likes to jog in a nearby park at night, when no one is out, and has started to get into playful fights with Jeongguk. They are constantly rolling on the apartment’s floor, wrestling. to Yoongi’s entertainment.
But this doesn’t mean that they haven’t struggled. There have been occasions in which Yoongi has found Kai crying on their bathroom floor. He doesn’t like to show weakness (he calls it), isn’t comfortable with the idea of being vulnerable (Jeongguk translates for him). So, he hides. He pretends to be fine when he’s hurting inside.
Transitioning to a vampire has never been easy. Being forced to become one… It’s equivalent to the feeling of having your soul ripped from your body and thrown to the River Styx right in front of your eyes. It’s the very essence of you disappearing from the world. In more human terms, it’s like living in an ever-lasting existential crisis.
Yoongi has tried to comfort the boy multiple times. It doesn’t come easy to him. But he does his best to talk to Kai and maybe cook something when blood stops rolling down his cheeks. Like any other young boy, Kai likes meat (vampires can still eat). So Yoongi cooks him some steak, waking Jeongguk up in the middle of the night because of the smell. They all end up eating. Jeongguk always ends up with puffy cheeks the next morning. It’s cute. Yoongi bites them every time, just as Jeongguk is about to leave for class.
They make it work, somehow. Yoongi would be lying if he said he wasn’t even a little bit happy with what they have. He enjoys having someone to spend the night with. Hueningkai makes good company. He helps around with the cleaning and at times with breakfast (for Jeongguk). He plays games with Yoongi when the older vampire doesn’t have to worry about a deadline. He even likes to listen to Yoongi’s work. Yoongi has heard him, multiple times, humming one of his melodies in the middle of the night while carrying out a chore. He isn’t sure why, but it makes him feel quite fond of the young boy.
“You seem to like that one,” Yoongi comments one night, as Kai sweeps the living room floor and Yoongi folds clothes (freshly taken out from the dryer), “The song, I mean.”
“Oh,” Kai smiles, perhaps just realising he had been humming to one of the elder’s current projects. His cheeks get dusty, ruby red, shy in a boyish way, “Yeah. It’s very catchy. I think it might be my favourite one of the ones you’ve shown me.”
"I’m glad you like it,” Yoongi smiles, gently. He stops to look at the shirt he now holds in his hands. It’s nothing out of the extraordinary. It’s plain, white. But it feels new and different from his or Jeongguk’s clothes. The piles he has been putting in the washer look bigger now. It’s somewhat surreal.
“Do you know when it’s going to be released?”
“Maybe in a few months,” Yoongi says, tossing the now-folded shirt on top of a now neat tower composed of other shirts and towels, “We’re finishing the last songs of the second studio album for this boy band. And this one is supposed to be included in it. So, maybe, sometime in spring.”
“That’s so cool,” Kai smiles. For a second, Yoongi thinks he’s going to say something more. He sees it in his eyes, the desire to confess something, tell a secret, but it only lasts a heartbeat both no longer have.
He doesn’t say anything and focuses on collecting dust.
Yoongi tells himself he shouldn’t pry. Another part of him encourages him to ask. But he doesn’t get the chance. As soon as he opens his mouth, he hears a little “Hyung?”
It doesn’t come from Kai, who’s trying to clean a spot under the sofa. It comes from the hallway connecting to the bedrooms. Yoongi diverts his attention, looks beyond the darkness. Jeongguk, sleepy, rubbing his eyes, emerges from the shadows.
“Ggukie,” Yoongi tilts his head to the side before walking towards his boyfriend. Jeongguk smiles when he’s being held, waist trapped between welcoming arms, “What are you doing awake? It’s late.”
A look at the wall tells them it’s close to four am. Hueningkai, who had stopped to greet his other hyung, resumes cleaning the floor. He mutters something about a mop under his breath as Jeongguk snuggles Yoongi’s neck (bending his knees, making himself small).
“Woke up. Couldn’t go back to sleep,” Jeongguk says, yawning against the vampire’s skin.
“Did we wake you up?” Yoongi asks, concerned. But Jeongguk shakes his head.
“No. The neighbour did. She’s talking very loudly on the phone,” he says. Yoongi starts moving them back to the sofa, next to the clean laundry, “This is like the fifth time in a month.”
“Do you want me to talk to her?” Yoongi offers when they’re sitting. He pets Jeongguk’s hair, tucks it behind his ears, “I could scare her away. Make her want to move out, maybe? I heard that people around here are still scared of fangs.”
Jeongguk laughs, but he shakes his head. Yoongi kisses the tip of his nose when he’s done.
“You don’t have to, hyung. I’ll just complain about her later,” another yawn makes him scrunch his nose. Yoongi has to bite his lip to not screech. Jeongguk is constantly messing with the heart he shouldn’t have, and even more when he has just woken up. A tired Jeongguk, fogged by sleep, is a sight Yoongi seems to be unable to resist. His first instinct (when he sees him like this) is to carry him back to bed and warm him up until he’s snoring again. In other words, Jeongguk is cute. And Yoongi is incapable of controlling his emotions around him.
(So he kisses him softly, covering his whole face with delicate touches until he feels Kai standing in front of them, staring quietly).
“I made hyung some tea. We had some warm water in the kettle. I thought it might help,” the young boy says when Yoongi has looked away, cheks flaring, and thoughts all over the place. He’s shy. He prefers to be private about certain things. He was born in a different century. It’s still a little hard for him.
“Thank you, Kai,” Jeongguk smiles, receiving the mug, and patting the free spot next to him. The boy doesn’t need to be told twice. He joins them, easily, jumping on the sofa like a puppy that has been permitted to relax, “So, what were you two up to?”
“Just chores,” Yoongi says, caressing Jeongguk’s arm and looking at the pile of white he abandoned, “I was folding those and Huening was sweeping. Nothing much, really.”
“We were also talking about Yoongi hyung’s upcoming album,” Hueningkai adds.
“Not really mine,” the elder smiles, kissing Jeongguk’s head when he leans against him. The mug sits in between his hands, keeping them warm, “For the boy group.”
“Oh, right,” Jeongguk says through a yawn. Yoongi laughs, softly. Jeongguk, then, speaks directly to Kai, “Do you like any groups, by any chance?”
The younger vampire stops to think for some time.
“I’m a casual listener of many groups. But I wouldn’t call myself a fan of any of them,” he explains with a little twinkle in his eyes. He’s wearing a hoodie tonight. His head is being covered, as well as his hands. He looks comfortable and soft, like a cloud or cotton candy (but with fangs that could be mistaken for thorns), “Although…”
“Yes?” Jeongguk smiles when Kai trails off. He pats his leg, encouragingly. Yoongi nods at him when their eyes mee for a second.
But the younger vampire averts his eyes almost immediately, staring at the floor. His face soon matches the colour dusting Yoongi's cheeks. It takes him a minute but, in the end, he opens his mouth again and speaks.
“I used to want to be an idol,” Kai admits, “When I was younger.”
“Oh!?” Jeongguk exclaims, pushing his head away from Yoongi’s shoulder (the vampire starts to miss his warmth as soon as he moves), “Me too.”
“Noooo. Really, hyung?” Hueningkai laughs. His eyes sparkle, a familiar expression Yoongi has witnessed before. Too familiar, he would say. The eyes are the same. The way they shine and twinkle like tiny sparks in a dark yet bright night… Yoongi has seen that before. He covers a grin with his fist, trying not to explode as Jeongguk sits straight and begins to shriek like the (other) excited boy he still is.
“Yes. Really. I auditioned and everything. I was even in this reality show when I was much younger…”
Yoongi smiles. Watching the two talk passionately about what could have happened, the dreams they let go but still hold close to their hearts, makes Yoongi realise that he wouldn’t want to be anywhere else but home right now.
It feels right. Yoongi’s heart swells. It starts beating again, content.
This is okay.