Chapter Text
Caboose sometimes didn't know how to say things. There were so many words, but somehow there were even more thoughts, and the words and thoughts were really hard to match up. It took a while to gather the words about what happened in the maze the scary computer made. But one day he was talking to his friend Simmons and he remembered what happened and he didn't mean to start talking but he started saying it.
He said, remember that time in that place that computer made, that one where there were two Carolinas? And Simmons said yeah, and he sounded like he did not want to talk about it, but Caboose had to talk about it, because the words worked so hard to get there and it would just not be nice for him to ignore all that work. So Caboose said he was going to tell about what happened to him in there because he didn't know the words for it before, but he did now, and Simmons looked at him with the face that said he was curious because he liked to hear new things.
So Caboose said, I used to live on the moon in one of those big metal houses that had a lot of kids in it. Simmons said I know, you have said that before, so Caboose continued. He talked about how there were no dogs allowed there even though Caboose always wanted a puppy, and how the other boys called him mean things and the girls defended him so he had a lot of friends who were girls, and they said they were his sisters now. Simmons said okay, but what about the labyrinth, and Caboose looked away for a few seconds so he could make sure the words were still in the right order in his head.
He talked about how the people who were in charge of the big house on the moon were running out of money to take care of all the people living in the house, but it costed even more money to send some people away off the moon, so the house stayed full while the supplies got lower and lower. And Caboose ate a lot of food, Simmons laughed and said boy does he know that, but then he looked sad again when Caboose kept talking. The food was not very good on the moon so Caboose had to eat more than the other people to get enough energy to work and play and be awake. But there was not enough for that anymore, and even though Caboose got more rations, he gave the extra ones to his sisters because they were all hungry, even though Caboose was so hungry.
The way that story ends for real is when the army said we need more soldiers and Caboose was big and strong so they took him away from the moon and he got plenty of food and he got to make friends like Church and Agent Washington and you, Simmons, and there were not so many people on the moon any more so the ones who were left there were okay again. But in the computer (the labyrinth, Simmons corrected) that didn't happen. Caboose was still on the moon and it kept getting darker, and colder, and the house that was so loud and full of people got quiet and empty. People left and nobody said where they went but there was nowhere to go so he knew they had just died and they were being nice because they thought Caboose could not understand. He had been so, so hungry and everything hurt but the worst hurting was when he remembered Church and Sarge and Sheila and Donut and even Tucker and how he would never get to be friends with them or fight evil guys with them or make pancakes in the mornings when the base was all full of light from the rising sun.
It hurt but crying took energy he did not have, so he went to sleep on the bottom bunk of the cold empty bunk bed that did not shift with the movement of one of his sisters above. He wasn't hungry when he slept so he slept, and he didn't dream, and he tried not to be awake because thinking hurt. Simmons looked at Caboose with a very sad face. He said how were you able to get out of that on your own, that sounds horrible, and Caboose smiled because that was the good part. He had used his imagination to fight back against all the bad thoughts and the hunger and what was really that bad computer, and he imagined his friends there, and he felt this strength come into him, and he stood up, and suddenly the dark cold room wasn't there anymore. It was just gray and white walls and a black space which was still pretty cold and dark but it was definitely not the moon so he ran to where he heard voices and he found his friends and you know the rest, Simmons, you were there.
Simmons smiled a little even though he still looked sad. He looked at Caboose, who was tired from saying all those words and hoping they came out making sense, and he said, I have something to talk about too, is that okay. And of course it was okay, Simmons was his friend and he can talk about anything he wants, and Simmons did that sad smile again, and he sighed, and he said he had something to say about the labyrinth too. What he saw, and how there might have been jokes going around about it, but that wasn't the whole thing, and ugh, it was stupid, maybe he shouldn't talk about it, but Caboose said no, this is important. And he looked right at Simmons and Simmons nodded and said you know, you're right, you worked so hard to tell me all that, you deserve to know my truth too.