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“Why didn’t you tell me?”
It was a question Kara had been expecting for some time. She knew it would never be this easy. What Kara didn’t expect was the cool and calculating manner Lena asked it in.
“I told you were the only one who saw me for…”
“Stop. Stop it. You can’t be truthful even now, can you? How low do you think of me that you won’t even me tell me truth now.” It was not as if these words were the harshest Lena had used for the past weeks but the venom with which Lena spit the words, cut through Kara’s heart.
“Lena, I’m telling the tru…”
“Oh please, our whole friendship might be a lie but I know how to read people, alien or not.” Her cold facade broke as she took a step closer to Kara.
“So, tell me the truth Kara. I fucking shot my brother for you. The least you can manage to do is tell me the fucking truth.” The hurt and pain and anger and something, which Kara refused to acknowledge, radiating from Lena hit Kara with so much force, making her stumble backwards.
“I’m going to ask you one last time. And if you won’t tell the truth you can leave me the fuck alone.” Lena spoke in the tone which made it clear that this was the ride or die option. It hit Kara realize that if she didn’t say anything now she wouldn’t be able to say anything to her ever again.
“Why. Didn’t. You. Tell. Me.” Each word was emphasised with a jab to Kara’s chest. What followed was a silence which suffocated both of them.
Lena gave Kara one last look before she turned around and
“Because I needed a reason.” Kara whispered into the room.
“What?” confusion bled into Lena’s voice as she turned to face the hero again.
“Because I needed a reason and it was the only one I had.” Kara spoke a little louder with a sigh. She fisted her hand, gathering her strength.
“Reason for…” Lena spoke with a caution expecting Kara to walk away.
“Reason for me to not tell you how much I love you. Because if I told you then I would have no reason not to pour my heart out to you. I knew that not only will you accept me but also see the real me and I wouldn’t be able to stop myself from showing you how much I want you, how much I want you to be the person I spend my whole life with, how much I want you to be there for every single moment of my life.” Kara came closer to Lena, opening herself fully for the first time in her life. Her eyes showed so much pain and Lena adverted her eyes.
Kara took Lena’s hand so delicately expecting her to flinch but when she didn’t, she took her hand and lifted Lena’s face to look into her eyes.
“I’m in love with you, Lena. I have been for a very long time. And this secret was the only thing holding me back.” Kara spoke with so much reverence that Lena had no choice but to believe.
“Why? Why didn’t you want to tell me? Why were you so embarrassed to be in love with me?” Now, all Kara could see on Lena’s face was the hurt and love for Kara.
“I was not embarrassed. I was scared. Because one day you’ll leave me. It might not be your choice but you will. I will live longer than you. I age slowly. I’ve already lost too much, Lena. I’ve lost everyone and I don’t think.. no, I know, I can’t bear losing you too. I will break Lena and you won’t be there.”
“I know how selfish this is, but I just couldn’t.”