Work Text:
Often time they had spent their conversations outside, touching cold air against skin as past them went a flurrying wisp of barks and fur. The cold now however, wrapped around their presence, coats desperate to match the wind chill to the hollow in their spirits. Winter had come early this year.
“Let's go back inside awhile.” Will spoke, only as request. Alana settled her hands in her overcoat and in a tired sonant, replied.
“It's okay. Our dogs haven't seen each other in a long time. It's nice to see them play.” She shook a loose strand of hair from her face, and Will glanced the thin scar nearly faded from her forehead. It hadn't taken long for it to heal, or for her to pick up another stray while she had stayed at home recovering from. Other, less visible wounds.
“It's only been a few months, Alana.” Will shrugged a bit, tucking his scarf closer to his neck then feeling skin pull deep under the layers.
“A little over a year, to be perfectly honest.” She replied with calm earnest. Just watching their dogs move around freely was immensely satisfying to both owners.
“Still picking up my habits?” Will felt a smile creep up on him as he watched a spotted lab romp with the others.
“I am.” A small grin in her voice obvious in it's return over the tailing shadow in her gaze. “Picked her up from the clinic on the way here. Haven't chosen a name yet.”
“Usually the vet gives them a name.”
“I was thinking about something a little less intricate then they derived.” Alana, pulled a folded paper from her coat and showed him. All he could come back with was 'Oh.'
“Probably Buttercup.”
“Sounds wise enough.” Will laughed quietly.
A few more minutes went by in the comforting idleness, then they did agree to go inside. He whistled for the dogs as he held open the door, and they came obediently along. Not many people he knew could stay out in 50°F in an inch of snow. Or should for that matter. Will stoked the fire, the dogs padding and panting quietly into their resting space, ready to dry themselves as he struck the matches. The scent of stave oak softened the chill throughout the room and as he stood up, he winced slightly. The pull of skin at his stomach a grim reminder of still strained and replacing cells. He was happy to have his back to Alana, the sun behind her when he glanced as she sat down comfortably in a new chair. Another replacement. He buried the thought train.
“Want some cocoa? I found a flavour at the store that sounded good.” Will turned with a half smile, his hands rubbing together a bit, easing into warmth and bouncing away the echoing mental representation. She smiled in rejoinder, well on her mouth, but her eyes still pall with sorrow. He nodded and cleared his throat a bit, flicking his eyes about in recall. “I have marshmallows too.” This time she exuded a heart filled grin.
“I'd like that.” She reached down to scratch at her first stray dog's ears. An adoption that had happened while he hadn't been here. Alana had named her Applesauce, and he couldn't help himself but to smile at the discovery. Thank you, Will.” The sincerity in her voice touched a heavy chord in his chest before he moved further into old memory. It thrummed end-to-end in his spirit as he settled into the rhythm of making two cups of cocoa.
He watched her as he stirred in the soft white sponges, adding a few extra on top of the warm beverage for amusement. He noticed even with the sun behind her, the paleness of her showed the new establishment she had taken in her professional life. In public she was as strong as everything; stronger then everyone but in the quiet, loneliness of her home, she decided to gather up. Visit Will. It was no more grim, then the fresh determination that had showed through her gaze into Will in the first place. It wasn't desperate or needy, and he knew they were both grateful for the acceptance. He handed her one of the mugs, carefully stepping past two of his dogs.
“I haven't had marshmallows in cocoa since I was little.” Alana smiled and took a sip gratefully. As he settled into a chair across from her, straining to comprise another grimace, a satisfied look sparked in her face. He cherished it internally.
“Me either. It was just a whim to be honest. And they were on sale.” He was about to lean back in the chair he had set to collapse on, when he noticed a difference in her grasp on the warm mug. He set himself on the edge of the seat instead and reached across the way, the heat from the fire tingling his skin as he lightly touched the short follicles at her wrist with his fingertips. A gingerly placed consolation that defused the voiceless shiver coursing through her gaze, nothing more.
“Tastes much better sharing it with a friend.” He spoke in an even tone, lifting a peaceful gesture to his eyes when she gazed back. With only a moment of searching a smile tugged back from her.
“Not so healthy to share with dogs, is it?” She laughed, as the playful spark reignited in her voice.
“Fair point.” He laughed softly in return. Now he settled back as she did, both mutually silent as they filled the warm dwelling with endless thoughts.
The words that did pass sifted carefully through each other's lips between long stretches of time. A peaceful hum over the intricate mix of dogs breathing and crackling firewood. Beyond that, every statement eased away old and new wounds alike. It would be impossible to blame one another for past decisions, or reasoning. They would pick up the pieces, and start again with new clarity. They could and would always be friends.
As the sun dipped below the trees, he rose to make them both second cups, and this time Alana followed. A mischievous saunter chased her step.
“To hell with refinery.” She dipped her hand in the marshmallow bag and fished a few into her hand. He laughed while stirring when she popped them into her mouth. Then he ducked into a cupboard and pulled out a second bagful.
“Big ones here. Good for dunking.” He ripped open the plastic, and settled the first two he pulled free halfway into his mug.
“Well then, thank goodness they were on sale.” Alana was quick to note the matching brand then she followed suit, covering her mouth a bit as she swallowed, eyes watering. “Oh, that's still a little too hot.”
“Sorry.” Will was extensively humoured and he immediately knew Alana saw through the apology. He was an easy read to her once, and the times he had lied and caused her pain, something that could of eventually destroyed this, had become only shadows he chased away now. Only a few internal stitches remained and soon even they would become just a memory. Something that was avoidable, but not long forgotten. He found a feeling inside him still grateful to have had those memories. He hoped she was the same, by her being here it should have erased any doubts.
“You've been chewing awhile.” Alana leaned her head to the side, to catch his full attention. He swallowed the mushy substance with two long swigs of cocoa.
“Just following a trail.” He muttered with a sheepish look.
“Share?”
“It's...” Will wafted the mug to his lips again as he drove back toward Alana's interest. “A good trail this time. Been awhile since I've had one of those.” He watched her wave of expression, and recognized what he hoped for in the least. She wasn't doubting his words here and now. They were both listening to each other's every idiom. The sweet cadence of honesty distinct between them. Calming waiting for every detail, to learn from each other again.
To put any lesson from their thoughts would leave them both feeling like an open wound or a tear in the fabric of the sheer cover hid only little things within the mind. A shadowy outline, still recognized but only where they knew to look. They had outgrown fear of it, outlived it. Nothing rearing an angry head or an unwanted voice chiding quietly at inopportune times. Not so often, anyhow.
“Feeling grateful. For your visit.” Will sipped deep from the mug, the last marshmallow bits tumbling past his teeth.
“Me too. Company and cocoa made my night.” Alana stole another from the bag and chewed it in thought. She leaned on the counter, crossing her arms, mug in her left hand.
“You're welcome to come back whenever you need company.”
“I'll keep you in mind.” Alana nodded into her final swig. The warmth was setting into both of them, and the peaceful rustling of animals snuffling about reminded them how close they had to come to losing everything. To escaping accidentally into whatever sound or vivid memory that would haunt them most. “It's nice to visit when it's only us talking. Nobody else.”
“It's a lot easier when it's just two people talking.” Will held back on the simmering thought, that only concern when they spoke to one another. Sensing his step away mentally, Alana picked at a less harmful scab.
“You can bring your dogs over if you like. When you want to.”
“That's more then fair.” Especially fair that neither individual was looking to irritate their wounds. Friendship was more then knowing someone, but understanding them as well.
They were after all, alive. Alive, and together. That's all that really mattered. The imaginary line between them had disappeared. Replaced by the comforting acknowledgement of the genuine spirit of one another. Though their smiles now carved into the muscle in their skin with silent pain, both of them could bring out a depth of careful comfort together.
They had settled back into the chairs by the fire, soaking in the warmth. The flame was dancing evenly, washing out the chill of absence that had collected in their spirits only moments before they had greeted at the door. Now gently sated, and wrapped in calm. The truth of things. If reality could carry an awareness of that, at least.
“I'd like to start taking Applesauce on walks again.” Alana rolled her head lightly on the chair to watch Will open his eyes and peruse across her gaze.
“Sure. We can all go if you like.” Will swallowed, understanding how much easier it was to take their mind off things when they were with the animals. Someone that could understand without struggle, and would love unconditionally.
“I'd like that.”
The first night she returned, it rained. They settled for another silent gathering around the fire and more marshmallows. It was peaceful. Will was a bit hungry, but couldn't bring himself to handle the kitchen with Alana present. She didn't ask, and he wondered if it was the same. He didn't doubt it very much. The second night, Alana had to cancel. Something they both were regretful to hear but none would hold it like another wound. They had enough scars already.
The third time they finally got their fingers around the right weather. To see Alana smiling and frolicking with the dogs for over an hour, was beautiful. Will wanted to join, but after walking in the forest together about a mile he had settled under a tree with Winston, one of his recent strays. It hurt too much still to move around much, Will understood it was partially psychosomatic. Trauma and pain do that. Winston rumbled away after a few minutes settled on Will's knee, leaving his friend alone under the shade of the tree.
A soft wind shook leaves across the forest path, scrapping lightly in the dirt and settling in a mess together on the opposite side. Tangled and unable to flit away into nothingness...
“Will?” Alana sat down beside him, a slight sweat glistening her skin, her eyes glazing over a bit. Almost afraid. He laughed lightly, and leaned his head against the bark, the light crunch satisfying.
“I'm doing fine. Looking forward to joining once this heals better.” He resisting covering the wound, it already felt like it was in the open after all.
“Everything takes time.” Alana didn't smile this time, he regretted leading her into his barrier.
“I know.” He said it without cracking his voice, but a smile slithered at the corners of his lips. It caught her off guard, but she knew he wasn't pressing her words away. “Tread carefully. Or so the surgeon said.” He grunted and stood up, a pop sounded a comforting stretch for his stiff limbs.
“Nice to see your stubborn streak is wearing a bit.” A playful glint bounced in Alana's eyes.
“Right. Until I need it again.” Will chuckled. “Hopefully that will be awhile.” He gave a whistle and the pack rounded the trees to snuffle at their feet, obediently. Applesauce and Buttercup at Alana's boots.
“Ready?” Alana scratched behind her dog's ears, the little bodies wagging beneath her touch.
“As a choice, no.” Will's hand was found by his terrier for a final lick before he stood straight again. “As a necessity, yes.”
“Let's do this again soon.” Alana folded her hands into her pockets with a realness that only comes from the bliss of such a moment.
“I'd like that.” Will said barely above a whisper.