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(Annoying) Company

Summary:

Thalia's bored and Percy's nearby. Post-TLO

Notes:

Just a short one-shot I thought of when contemplating the relationship between the children of the Big Three.

(See the end of the work for more notes.)

Work Text:

Knock knock knock.

“Percy, will you get that?” Sally called.

I sighed gratefully and pushed myself to my feet, setting the object of my mental torture -- i.e., my comprehension questions for Lord of the Flies -- to the side. I was almost to the front door when--

Knockknockknock.

“I’m coming,” I grumbled.

I undid the locks and pulled the door open.

“Move.”

“Ow!” I exclaimed, rubbing my arm. I stared at the girl who had just pushed past me. “What was that for?”

Thalia shrugged. “You didn’t move in time.”

I followed her as she found the living room and dropped onto the couch. Letting out a deep sigh, she kicked her feet, combat boots and all, up on the coffee table.

Paul was frozen in his chair, his eyes the only part of him moving as he looked from me to Thalia and back.

My mom walked in, wiping her hands on a kitchen towel. “Who was at--?” she started to ask, but she stopped. “Oh. Hello, Thalia, dear.”

Thalia smiled politely. “Hi, Mrs. Blofis.” She glanced at Paul from the corner of her eye. “Who’s the mortal?”

I sighed in defeat. “Paul, this is Thalia. Thalia, this is my step-dad, Paul.”

Paul nodded slowly, still dazed.

Mom smiled warmly at her, just like she always did. “It’s nice to see you again, dear. Can I get you anything to drink?”

“She’s not staying,” I said, but Thalia spoke over me.

“Root beer, if you have it.”

“Of course.” Mom left and returned a few seconds later with a bottle.

“Thank you,” Thalia said politely. She opened it and took a sip.

Paul still looked uncertain. He’d relaxed a bit when he realized I knew her, but he was still new to our apartment. Although part of his wariness may have been because of the bow and full quiver of arrows slung across Thalia’s body. That sort of thing hadn’t fazed my mom or me in years.

“So, Thalia, Percy told me you’re with Artemis’ Hunters now?” Mom asked.

“Yeah,” she replied. “I’m her Lieutenant, actually.” She gestured to her circlet.

“Why are you here?” I interrupted, crossing my arms over my chest.

“Percy!” my mom hissed, but Thalia just raised her eyebrows in amusement.

“Can’t I pay a visit to my favorite Seaweed Brain without having an ulterior motive?”

“In case you haven’t noticed, we aren’t exactly best friends. And don’t call me that,” I added after a second.

She rolled her eyes. “Fine, Kelp Head.” She sighed. “My Lady decided I deserve a break after the stress of the Battle of Manhattan. The only place there’s something for me is New York, so here I am.”

“Why me, though? Annabeth’s going to a boarding school on the other side of Manhattan. Take the subway over there.”

Thalia sighed again. “I did. But Annabeth’s in the library, studying, and she refuses to leave before she’s finished. It’s too boring there, so I figured I’d walk around a bit before I remembered you live here, too.”

“So you’re just going to hang out here until she’s done studying?”

She shrugged. “Pretty much.”

“Fantastic.”

“You’re welcome to stay however long you need, Thalia.”

Thalia smirked at me, and I groaned at my mom’s neverending hospitality.

Mom finally seemed to notice Paul’s bemusement. “You’ll get used to it, dear. It happens a lot.”

He looked at her. “Random teenagers coming to your house is normal?”

“I’m the closest demigod to camp,” I answered. “And everyone knows Mom’s incapable of turning people away. Some stop by for ambrosia or nectar, some for a couple drachma. A couple even come over just for food; it’s cheaper than eating out, and when we’re hungry, we’re hungry.”

Thalia had picked up my packet of questions and was scanning it. “Kelp Head,” she began.

“I told you not to call me that!”

“No, you said not to call you Seaweed Brain. It’s either that or Kelp Head; which do you prefer?”

I grumbled unintelligibly.

She smirked and continued. “These questions you’re doing?”

“What about them?”

She held the packet up. “You’re answering them in Greek.”

ηλίθιος,” I said.

“Yeah, you are. Now you’ve gotta rewrite it all!”

I shook my head smugly. “Nope. Because Paul is my English teacher again this year. I’ll just translate it orally for him. Not the first time this has happened.”

She stuck her tongue out at me.

My mom -- who had disappeared back into the kitchen -- poked her head through the doorway. “Thalia, do you like milk with your cookies or do you just want your root beer?”

“Milk, please, Mrs. Blofis.”

“What have I told you, sweetheart?” she admonished. “Call me Aunt Sally.”

Thalia smiled. “Milk, please, Aunt Sally.”

Mom smiled back and left.

Paul turned to me. “Aunt...?”

I remembered his reaction when Tyson had called Poseidon “Daddy”. He was getting better at dealing with the strangeness of the mythological world, but sometimes his mortal thinking snapped back in place.

I couldn’t blame him. It’d taken me a while, too.

“My father is Zeus,” Thalia replied. “Technically, Percy and I are cousins.”

“Technically?”

“The gods don’t have DNA,” I explained. “So in reality, there’s not any biological relation between us. But still, there are some things you just don’t do. Like you don’t date someone with the same godly parent, but you can date someone who could be considered your cousin, like a child of Ares dating a child of Hermes.”

“Speaking of,” Thalia interrupted. “Is Clarisse still with that Chris guy?”

I nodded. “Not that she’ll even admit it, or let him take her out of camp for a date. But the signs are there, if you know where to look.”

Mom came back into the living room, a tray in her hands. Balanced on top were four glasses of milk and a large plate of blue chocolate chip cookies. She set it on the coffee table.

Thalia reached for a cookie and dipped it in her milk. “So, Kelp Head, you happy Annabeth’s in New York this year?”

I shrugged. “Well, yeah. She’s my best friend, and San Francisco is still dangerous, even without Mount Othrys.”

She gave me a confused look. When I glanced quickly at my mom, understanding lit her face. I was relieved -- until I saw the wicked gleam creep into her eyes.

“How much have you two hung out?” she asked casually.

“Just every so often. You know, getting hot dogs, taking Mrs. O’Leary to the park....”

“What about your other friends?” she continued. “I know for a fact Grover is at camp right now, and I’m sure you’ve at least been talking to Tyson.”

I shrugged nervously. “Grover’s spending time with Juniper, and Tyson is a general now.”

“I get it,” Thalia assured me. A smirk graced her face. “I’d want to spend all my time with my new girlfriend, too, if I were you.”

I groaned and dropped my head down onto the coffee table.

My mom turned to me, her eyes wide. “Percy?”

I lifted my head and looked at Thalia. “Thanks,” I said sarcastically. She smiled innocently.

Sighing, I nodded. “Yes, she’s telling the truth. Annabeth and I are dating.”

Have you ever heard your mom squeal? I hope you never do.

“When did this happen?” Mom demanded. “And why didn’t you tell me?”

I glared at Thalia while I answered. “The night after the war. I was sitting alone in the dining pavilion, thinking. Annabeth brought me a cupcake she and Tyson had made and told me to make a wish. We talked about the River Styx and the reward I asked for from the Olympians. She was laughing, I told her she wasn’t making it easy, she told me she was never, ever going to make things easy for me and to get used to it. Then she leaned in and kissed me, and I kissed her back, and that’s that.”

“You’re leaving out the lake,” Thalia piped up helpfully. “That’s the best part.”

“Thank you, Thalia. You’re so helpful.”

“What happened at the lake?” my mom asked.

Thalia spoke before I could even open my mouth. “While they were kissing, Clarisse led the entire camp into the pavilion, yelling about how it was ‘about time’. Everyone lifted the lovebirds onto their shoulders, carried them to the canoe lake, and tossed them in. Probably figured it’d be funny, but then they realized Kelp Head’s the son of Poseidon and can breathe underwater. He made an air bubble at the bottom of the lake.”

“Why didn’t you tell me, Percy?” Mom repeated. “Annabeth’s been over several times since you came home!”

I sighed. Thalia was going to make my gray streak even longer. “I didn’t want everyone making a big deal out of it. Cause it’s not, seriously. We’re dating, awesome, everyone was waiting for it to happen. I just want to spend time with her, without someone freaking out because we’re ‘finally’ together.” I shrugged. “Besides, it isn’t a big deal. We’re just like any normal couple.”

“Yeah, because taking your pet hellhound for a walk in Central Park is normal,” Thalia said.

“Okay, we’re just like any other demigod couple,” I reiterated.

She gave me a look. “Did you not hear me say pet hellhound? Face it, Percy, you’re not like any other demigod. You and Annabeth’s relationship will never be ‘just like’ any other.”

“You’re extremely irritating, do you know that?”

“I try.”

At that moment, someone knocked.

“I’ve got it,” Paul volunteered, seeming eager to get out of the crossfire that was my and Thalia’s conversation.

“Kelp Head,” Thalia muttered.

“Pinecone Face,” I retorted.

We heard the front door opening. “Why, hello, Annabeth,” Paul said.

I was on my feet immediately. There was a struggle in the living room doorway as Thalia and I both tried to squeeze through, with little result. I finally exclaimed in triumph as I succeeded in making it into the hallway. I speed-walked down the hall.

“Annabeth!” I exclaimed, hugging her tightly. She let out a startled laugh but returned the embrace.

“What’s this for?” she asked. “I just saw you the other day.”

Just then, Thalia came into view. “Hey, Annie.”

Annabeth rolled her eyes. “Stop calling me that.”

“I practically raised you, I can call you what I want.”

“We were together for less than a year.”

“And in that year, I practically raised you!”

“Why are you even here?”

“To drive me insane, that’s why,” I cut in grumpily.

Before she could reply, my mom walked into view. “Annabeth!” she exclaimed, much in the same way I had. I was pushed out of the way as Mom hugged my girlfriend.

Annabeth looked at me over Mom’s shoulder and raised her eyebrows.

“Blame her,” I said, pointing to Thalia.

“You’re welcome,” Thalia said smugly.

Notes:

ηλίθιος = idiot