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Ralph could hear the music from a block away, and looked sadly around the car for support.
"Remind me again why the fuck I'm here?" he asked, and after receiving disappointed looks and one smile from Simon, Eric shook his head at him.
"We went bowling with you like, two weeks ago. Now, you have to come to a party with us, so shut up. It'll be fun." He explained, pulling up on the side of the road.
"Does he have a dog or something?" Simon asked.
"Yeah, think he has a pet. Don't know what."
"Well, if you need me, that's where I'll be, hoping I don't get a seizure." He explained, and Ralph considered joining him. In both animal hanging-out, and possible party-avoidance due to medical emergency. He'd find his own medical emergency. Shouldn't be an issue.
Ralph never really liked parties. He wasn't a fan of loud noises. Of course, he loved talking to people and dancing and all that, but he seriously preferred small groups. Besides, wasn't it awkward to just go to a random person's house?
He stood in front of the door now, sighing. Sam and Eric went in first, immediately greeted by loud yells of welcome. Simon and Piggy kept their heads down, slipping into the crowd and trying to find a quiet room. Ralph was about to join them before Sam grabbed his arm and dragged him along. Ralph rolled his eyes, but just went with it, not feeling like arguing.
"Want a sprite or something? At least try to look somewhat content." Eric complained, and Ralph took a dramatic deep breath before nodding, and Eric disappeared, leaving him with Sam.
"Isn't this exciting?" Sam asked, struggling to talk over the music.
"Yeah, sure." Ralph offered, and Sam grinned.
"Once you get used to the noise you'll have fun. Promise."
"You know what's fun? Bowling."
"Is it? Couldn't tell."
Eric now returned and handed Ralph his drink, and then both he and Sam were gone. Ralph's eyes widened, and he searched the crowd, desperately trying to find them. Sure, they dragged him here, but at least he knew them.
People were dancing and moving, and as he pushed past drunk people, apologizing as he passed them, he sighed in defeat. Scooting along the walls now, he hoped to be able to somehow find Simon and Piggy with whatever animal they were befriending. He hoped they would have found the snacks by now as well, as he was quite hungry.
"The things I do for bowling." Ralph grumbled, and suddenly bumped into someone, looking up quickly. They were quite tall, so it took him a while, but the other person was smiling and seemed friendly. They seemed familiar, but Ralph couldn't quite place where he knew them from.
"Bowling?" The stranger asked, their tone light.
Ralph laughed, avoiding their gaze. "Yeah. Bowling." He finally met their eyes, a startling blue, and gulped. Maybe he could talk to them for a while, and Sam and Eric would pop up so he wouldn't have to awkwardly navigate through more groups of people.
"My name's Ralph." He said, and the other person looked amused.
"Well, nice to meet you. My name's Jack." The other person, Jack, looked at him with interest. "You look like you're currently hating something."
"Do I? I was trying to hide that. I hate parties. With a passion."
"Oh? Why?"
"Loud, irritating. Sam and Eric always disappear and leave me, and then I end up watching from a wall or sitting in a room petting a cat. This party's almost worse somehow. The music is way too loud, and the house seems endless, so I have no clue where Simon and Piggy are." Ralph complained, taking a sip from his drink. Jack raised an eyebrow.
"Huh. The house is nice though." he offered, and Ralph chuckled.
"Not my style. Weird decor, to be honest. Maybe I'm just picky. I've never seen so many painted pictures of random people in my life. Are they trying to give off super-villain vibes with all the dark colours? Because it's working."
"Interior designer?"
"No, just know how ugly things look. I mean, come on. There's a taxidermy deer head above the door. What the fuck is that about?" Ralph gestured toward the unsettling head mounted on a plaque that seemed to watch his every mood. Jack seemed entertained by Ralph's judgmental attitude, smiling widely.
"Huh. You're right. That deer head is a little unsettling, isn't it?"
"Unsettling? I'd say terrifying." Ralph looked around. "Is that a fucking fur carpet? Like one of those bear rugs? What the fuck? I didn't even know those existed in real life."
Jack glanced over, and kicked the rug lightly with his foot. "Looks kinda cool, I think."
"Well, don't become an interior designer when you grow up." Ralph suggested, and Jack smiled once more, now more of a smirk.
"Is this what you usually do at parties? Critique decor?"
"Usually the decor isn't this atrocious. What do you usually do at parties then, huh?" Ralph asked, tilting his head.
"Dance. Talk. The usual."
"Boring."
"Okay, property brothers fan. Let's talk about your opinions on curtains, that's much more entertaining."
Ralph took another sip. "Touche, I guess. How's your night so far?"
"Good. I'm learning a lot."
"Where are your friends? Ditch you too?"
Jack snorted. "See that dude over there, swaying on his feet, with the clout goggles? That's Maurice. He's an idiot." He then pointed to a corner of the room, only occupied by three people and a cat.
"And that one, talking to the ones petting Marvin, that's Roger." Jack smiled. "He also hates parties."
"Hey! He's talking to my friends, Simon and Piggy." Ralph said, jerking his head toward them.
"Piggy?" Jack questioned, seeming like he was about to laugh. Ralph narrowed his eyes with a glare.
"Yeah. People used to call him that to make fun of him, so he calls himself that by choice just to fuck with them." Ralph said, suddenly feeling very defensive. Jack held up his hands.
"Alright then. Just wondering."
Ralph relaxed. "Yeah, sorry. Usually people are really mean to him. We actually met after I beat the shit out of some kid who was making fun of him. Good times." Ralph joked.
"Well, Marvin seems to be a fan."
"Marvin?"
Jack pointed back to the corner. "The cat." Piggy was currently petting a ginger cat with little white paws, who was napping, surrounded by Simon and Roger.
"Marvin? That's a weird name. Who names their cat Marvin? That's like- a person name. Not a cat name." Ralph commented.
"Hey, it's cute. Marvin's perfect." Jack scowled, and Ralph smiled.
"Yeah, he is kind of a cute cat, I suppose." Ralph turned as someone walked by the two of them, waving goodbye.
"Sorry Jack! I gotta bounce, my mom wants me home by 11. Awesome party!" The person shouted, and Jack grinned, giving them two thumbs up and a wave goodbye as well.
"Who's that?" Ralph asked.
"No clue."
"Huh. Where's the party host, anyway? I can give them decor tips, maybe." Ralph laughed, and looked up at Jack, who seemed moments away from laughing as well.
"Generally you thank them for the party, but that's an interesting approach."
"Well, of course I'll do that too. I'm not a jerk. Just because this party sucks, and I'm hating like, every second of being here, doesn't mean I'll be rude about it." Ralph explained.
"Great party Jack!" Yet another person shouted as they passed, waving. Jack nodded at them, waving back quickly.
"Jeez, you sure are popular." Ralph teased, and Jack looked at him, confused.
"Well, most people know who I am. I'm surprised you don't, but you were dragged here."
"I talk to like, maybe 7 people. Tops."
"Huh." Jack had a weird look on his face now, almost as though he was baffled.
"Why're you looking at me like that?" Ralph asked.
"Like what?"
"Like you're confused by me or something."
Jack gave him one last look of disbelief, before bursting out laughing, shaking his head.
"What? I can't have said anything that funny." Ralph said, taking the last sip of his drink.
"No, you only just insulted my entire house, my decor choices, portraits of my family, music choice, the name of my fucking cat, and just the whole party in general." Jack mocked, but he didn't seem mad, instead amused.
"What?" Ralph questioned, but then he finally realized. A wave of humiliation washed over him, and he could feel his face go crimson. He avoided Jack's eyes, and nervously giggled.
"I'm surprised it took you that long. My face is literally on the wall over there." Jack pointed to yet another family portrait hung nearby, and Ralph's eyes widened.
"I'm so fucking sorry. I'm such a dumbass. Oh my God-" Ralph began, rambling as he continued to furiously blush. Jack did not help the situation as he laughed hysterically, wiping tears from his eyes.
"It's okay. You didn't know. Now go apologize to my cat." Jack joked, and Ralph continued to nervously chuckle, walking towards the couch. Jack followed him, waving to Roger and beginning to talk to him.
"Simon, Piggy, I am the biggest fucking idiot." Ralph whispered quickly as he sat down, giving the cat a quick pet on the head. Simon looked up, curious.
"Why?"
"Merridew? What the fuck?"
Ralph looked up as he heard Piggy swear, and now it was Jack who was red in the face as Piggy glared at him. Ralph's eyes darted back and forth.
"Huh? What's up?" He asked, and Piggy looked away quickly, still looking quite upset.
"Ralph, it's Merridew. You know."
"That's Jack, Piggy."
"How much of a dumbass are you? God, Ralph, don't get me wrong, you're awesome, but sometimes you drive me insane."
Simon seemed to be just as lost and Piggy looked back at Jack, still furious.
"Ralph, Jack was the reason that we got to meet."
Realization dawned on Ralph, and he looked between the two of them rapidly, his jaw dropped.
"Oh my fucking God. You're that asshole?"
"Yeah, the one and only." Jack said, attempting a light tone. Simon shifted uncomfortably, and returned to petting the cat and minding his own business. Roger seemed to be greatly interested, and was smiling slightly.
"Sam and Eric didn't tell us that." Ralph muttered, and Piggy sighed.
"No, they did not."
"Well, we're kind of even now. I bullied you for like, a year, and you even got a new best friend and cool nickname out of it, I guess. Also, Ralph beat me up and just insulted all of my life choices." Jack said, still clearly trying to ease the tension. He then paused. "Also, I'm really sorry, Peter. "
"It's Piggy. And it's alright. It was a while ago. Also, Ralph, you did what?" Piggy looked over at Ralph, who was still blushing, and avoiding Piggy's gaze.
"Didn't know it was his house."
"God, you're so fucking dumb." Piggy mocked, and Ralph stuck his tongue out, rolling his eyes.
"Well, wasn't this a fun party?" Jack chimed in, smirking at Ralph.
"More fun that most, I'll have to go offer the host my compliments and tell him to light his rug on fire."
"Noted."