Archive of Our Own ^beta

Phil’s tidying the living room again. By tidying, Dan means he’s anxiously rearranging objects to look neat as if the placement of a light-up Mario figurine will either make or break this pivotal moment in their lives. It’s easy to tell that Phil is anxious just by the tidying itself. Dan’s rather anxious as well, but he elects to review the information they have and reconfirm that they have all the necessary paperwork for the social worker about twenty times.

Dan ushers their dog into the backyard for the time being. When they got the golden brown corgi-mix, he’d been just a bit hostile. It took them both a while to earn the dog’s trust. While he’s quite well behaved now, they don’t want to risk a bad reaction to Alex, so he’s outside.

They’ve only spoken with Alexander a few times, and he didn’t seem too over-the-top excited about coming to stay with Dan and Phil. This isn’t something either of them would have expected of a foster kid, though. Alex said that he wanted to come live with them both. He hasn’t been forced. Dan’s hanging onto that. 

As they know it, Alex’s birth mother is deceased and his father is serving time in prison for multiple DUIs. He’s been in and out of foster care since age 9, and spent all of his time out of the system with his father. He’d stayed with three foster homes while in the system. 

Today is their proper first impression as a family and a home. They both want this to go well. They want a kid to be a part of their lives, and they want to be a positive part of a kid’s life. Dan hopes they can do that with Alex. 

Alexander and his social worker, Anne, show up right on time. Phil practically runs to open the door. Dan follows, brushing lint from his jeans and readjusting his t-shirt. Phil swings the door open and smiles. In the doorway stands a fourteen-year-old kid with long dark hair that hangs into his face, and a middle-aged woman wearing an overenthusiastic smile. 

Alex’s hair is the slightest bit curly, and it hangs down long around his face and down his shoulders. It’s tangled and a bit messy. His skin is pale, his eyes have bags beneath them, and his features are sharp. He carries himself with a certain amount of uncertainty, shifting his weight between legs and avoiding looking directly at either Dan or Phil. 

“Hello!” Phil chirps with a smile, opening the door. “Come on in!” 

Dan looks at Alexander and smiles. “Hello,” he says, softly. He looks to the two backpacks Alex is carrying. “Shall I grab one of those, then?” he asks, not waiting for an answer before he picks up a backpack and carries it inside. 

Alex murmurs a quiet, “Thank you.” 

Dan brushes it off with an easy, “Of course.” 

Dan shows Alex to his room, and Alex’s eyes wander the house as he does so. “This place is huge,” he says quietly, almost as if he didn’t mean to say it aloud. 

Dan laughs. “Oh? Well, I hope you like it.” He shows Alex into his room, and they drop his bags on the mattress. “It’s kind of boring in here, right now, but Phil and I were thinking we could just bring you out on a major shopping spree or something to find some stuff that’s in your taste. Or just an online shopping spree. Whatever you want,” he says with a grin. “Just think about what you might need or want around here.” 

“Wow, uh, alright,” Alex says, still looking around. 

Dan thinks he must be a bit overwhelmed, so he stops himself from talking more. He promised himself that he would take things at Alex’s pace, so he won’t hover. 

“I should leave you to get unpacked, I reckon,” he says. “If you have any questions, I’ll just be with Phil and Anne, back in the lounge, getting everything sorted. Feel free to look around.” 

~•~•~ 

Once everything is in order, Anne bids farewell to Alex, Dan, and Phil. She leaves them alone with the new member of their family, still in his room. 

It’s late now, the sun is beginning to set outside, so Dan taps on Alex’s door and peeks into his room. He’s sat on the bed, scrolling through something on his phone. His bags are still shut, and everything in the room appears untouched. 

“Hey,” Dan says. “Me and Phil usually eat around six.” 

They had decided that getting onto a proper schedule for sleeping, eating, and working, would be essential before they could bring any kids into their lives. Dare Dan say they’ve done a rather good job so far. Though, Phil still often snacks late into the night.  

“I’ll probably just make some pasta. Feel free to join us, or just come get some food. We don’t really mind if you eat in here,” Dan continues. 

Alex just nods and Dan smiles, walking back out to the kitchen to cook. 

Phil leans against the counter beside Dan, watching him as he grabs a pot and fills it with water. Dan can feel his eyes on him and grins. “What?” he asks. 

“He’s here,” Phil says, smiling. 

“Mhm.” 

“Feeling those helicopter-mum instincts kicking in yet?” Phil teases. 

“I really am it’s actually terrible,” Dan admits, turning on the stove and covering the pot. He turns to Phil, leaning against the counter. 

Phil giggles. “Oh no.” 

“I want him to be happy here. Do you think he’ll be happy here?” 

Phil rolls his eyes. “He will be, Dan.” 

“Look, if any of the fourteen-year-olds from my secondary school had been told they were gonna go live with two 30-year-old gay men—” 

Phil chuckles. “Yeah, well the kids at your school were entitled pricks,” he says. Dan grins and tilts his head in agreement.  

“Besides, a lot can change in 20 years, Dan,” Phil adds, meeting Dan’s eyes. 

Dan nods, looking back to the not-yet boiling pot of water. 

“Hey,” Phil says softly. “He had a choice. He didn’t have to come with us.” 

Dan shrugs. “Maybe we’re just less terrible than his other options.”  

“Maybe,” Phil says. “But that’s good enough, right? We can make sure he’s happy here.” 

Dan nods, setting a box of pasta noodles beside the stove. 

“I really want him to be happy here.” 

It’s just a while later that Alex grabs a bowl, scoops himself a serving of pasta, and sits at the table with them while they eat. He holds himself a bit awkwardly, hesitating before doing anything as simple as picking up a plate. It makes sense, Dan thinks. So many new places and their new rules must be confusing. Dan wants to tell Alex that there’s no need to walk on eggshells, but he doesn’t want to call attention to Alex’s visible anxiety.

As they sit and eat, Dan isn’t sure if small talk would be more comfortable than the silence for Alex. Phil makes that decision for him. 

“Did you get the chance to look around much, Alex?” 

“Uh, yeah,” he says, his voice a mumble. “A bit.” He reaches to tuck his hair behind his ear. 

“Cool! Any questions or, uh, comments?” Phil asks with a chuckle, before scooping some pasta into his mouth. 

Alex looks down at his bowl, poking at the pasta. “Not really,” he says quietly. “Though, it is kind of creepy that you keep dead houseplants all over.” He pauses, eyes widening a bit, almost as if he didn’t mean to say it. 

Dan can’t help the immediate snort followed by badly suppressed laughter. 

Phil frowns, though he can’t hide his own amusement very well. “Hey, they could—” 

Dan giggles, looking at Phil. “Phil.” 

Phil’s lips twitch up despite himself. “Look, they could still—” 

“Phil.” 

“What?” 

“He literally just called you out.” 

Phil smiles and gives an eye roll. “Listen, I—I still believe in my children. They can make a comeback.”

Alex huffs a small amount of air out in an amused manner, his lips turn up a bit and he takes a bite of pasta. For the first night, that feels like a major win.

~•~•~ 

Pooh, the golden brown and white corgi, meets Alex on day two. Phil’s letting him back inside to say hello to a still-sleeping Dan. Phil argued that Pooh shouldn’t have to sleep outside all alone, but Dan had rolled his eyes. He wanted to introduce Alex to the pup on their own terms. Despite this, Phil is pretty sure he won’t mind some of Pooh’s patented wake-up kisses. He always laughs and opens his eyes, saying ‘oh hello, hello, hello there,’ and Phil always melts..

It’s early, so Phil assumes that Alex is still asleep. When he lets Pooh out of the backyard and into the flat, he runs about as if he’s never been allowed in before. In reality, he spends more time inside than out.

A sleepy Alex enters the room just after Phil slides the glass door open. Phil hears a surprised gasp and worries for a moment, turning to see Alex. Alex’s eyes light up when the corgi runs up to him. He immediately gets to his knees, and Pooh jumps up on him. His tail wagging, Pooh sniffs at Alex. Alex grins widely, so Phil relaxes.

“Who’s this?” he asks, not looking away from Pooh. He allows Pooh to get a good sniff before reaching slowly to pet him. 

“That would be Pooh, the family doggo,” Phil says, taking a seat on a dining chair to watch the two interact. “Dan and I have had him for a few years.”

“Pooh? Hello there Pooh,” Alex coos, scratching the dog behind the ear. “I’m Alex. Hello. Oh!” 

Pooh flops to the floor, rolling over in a request for belly rubs. Alex grins again, providing the belly scratches. 

“Cutie. You’re a baby. Baby doggo,” Alex baby-talks Pooh as he scratches him, and something warm builds in Phil’s stomach as he watches. 

He hardly knows Alex at all, but Phil has learned from his mum to trust a dog’s intuition. She would say that animals could sense someone’s energy. Alex certainly passed the dog test, as Pooh seems to adore him already. 

“I think he quite likes you,” Phil says with a grin. “That’s funny, he usually prefers girls.”

Alex looks to Pooh. “Oh, but you like me don’t you? Yes, yes, yes. You’re so sweet.”

Alex’s genuine smile is something to behold. It’s bright and a little bit crooked and absolutely wonderful. Phil wants to see it more. He wants to hear the soft laugh that Alex gives when Pooh jumps up on his lap, more. He wants Alex to stick around. 

It’s day two, but Phil’s already not sure that he can let Alex go. He wants to get to know Alex. He wants to watch him grow into an adult. He wants to push him gently toward his dreams and toward goodness and toward success. He wants to be a positive influence on his life. He wants to have this family. Not the silly nuclear family with white picket fences and popping out babies. He wants this. He wants himself, his partner, this somewhat troubled teenager, and their dog named after Winnie the Pooh. 

“You know,” Phil says, abandoning his plan to wake up Dan. “There’re treats and toys outside. Dan and I haven’t played with him enough lately.” 

Alex jumps up almost comically quickly. “Shall we go see?” he asks Pooh softly. “Let’s go, yeah?” Pooh follows him toward the backyard again. 

The dog pauses to look at Phil and wag his little tail. “Go on,” Phil coaxes, smiling. “Outside.” 

Pooh trots cheerfully off after Alex to the backyard. 

That night, Pooh plops himself in Alex’s room just like he belongs there. Dan offers to take him to their room, but Alex declines. He promises to take him outside to pee if he whines at the door, so Pooh curls up beside him in bed. 

Phil is thankful. It’s almost like the dog knows how important this is, and he’s trying to help. Trying to keep Alex, just as Dan and Phil are. 

~•~•~ 

The first time Phil hears Alex crying, he panics. It’s Alex’s third night in their home. He wants to run into his room and figure out what’s going on, why he’s so upset. But it’s silly, as he reminds himself. Alex has plenty of things to cry over. Change is overwhelming, be it good or bad.  

Dan and Phil still don’t know much about the other homes he’s been in. Phil remembers a friend in university who had spent a few years in foster care. She had said she’d never met any foster kid that hadn’t experienced some form of child abuse, whether within the system or before. They don’t know all the details as to why Alex had been removed from his biological father’s home multiple times. 

It’s okay that he’s crying, and it doesn’t mean that he hates it here, or that he wants to leave. 

Phil goes to Dan, closing the door to their room. “Alex is crying,” he blurts, leaning against the door. 

Dan sits up, frowning sympathetically. “This must be quite a lot for him, I’m sure.” 

“Should I…should I talk to him?” 

Dan inhales. “No, I don’t think that’s a good idea. Not yet, anyway. He’d probably just feel self-conscious.” 

Phil nods. “Well I want to do something,” he says. “Has he mentioned to you any candies or snacks he likes?” Phil asks, grabbing the house keys and his wallet off the bedside table. 

Dan smiles at him. “Phil, you’re so sweet,” he says, fond and teasing. 

Phil feels himself blush despite himself. “Shut up,” he says. “I’ll just get an assortment of things.” 

When he returns from the 24-hour shop down the street, holding three bags filled with snacks, Alex is silent. Phil chances a peek into the room. A dozen used tissues lie in a crumpled mess on the floor, and his heart clenches at the sight. Alex lies the wrong way over the bed, his feet hanging off. His hair is in his face, but he’s asleep.  

Phil ponders cleaning up the tissues. He decides against it. He wants Alex to know that he has privacy here, so Phil won’t enter the room without his permission. 

Phil digs a basket out of the cluttered hall closet. He arranges sweets and snacks in it, drawing a smiley face on a sticky note. He places the basket, along with the note, outside of Alex’s bedroom door.  

~•~•~ 

Phil wakes up the next day to an empty bed. Checking the time, he realizes that he’s managed a bit of a lie-in. So, he pulls himself out of bed. He remembers to put on a t-shirt as well as some pajama pants. He doesn’t want to scar Alex for life with the image of a thirty-year-old man he barely knows wandering about half-naked. 

Phil steps into the hallway, and he finds Alex stood in his own doorway, looking down at the basket. Alex startles when Phil opens his door. Phil, in turn, startles at Alex’s startle. 

“Oh!” Phil says in his surprise. “Good morning.” 

“Morning,” Alex murmurs, looking down. His hair falls into his face. “Um,” he starts, looking up at Phil and then down at the basket again. “Is this for me?”  

He sounds so incredulous that Phil’s heart aches. “Yes! If you want it, that is,” Phil answers. “I’m not sure if you really like sweets all that much and I, uh, I didn’t know what you liked so I—” 

Dan cuts off Phil’s rambling, walking into the hallway. He also remembered to put on clothes, thankfully. “So, Phil bought out the entire drug store’s candy inventory,” he says with a smile, pressing a warm mug into Phil’s hands. 

Phil thanks Dan softly, taking the coffee. “I wanted a good selection!” he replies in his defense, turning back to Alex. “Anyways, if there’s anything you don’t want, just leave it.” 

“Yeah, Phil will eat anything you let him, please hide that basket,” Dan teases, sliding an arm around Phil’s side and leaning against his shoulder. 

Phil grins when he sees Alex’s lips turn up. “Thank you,” Alex softly says, sifting through the basket of candy. “I’m not big on fruity things, so I’ll, uh, leave those for you.” 

“Yes,” Phil says under his breath, and Dan rolls his eyes. 

“So, you’re a fan of chocolate?” Phil asks. “For future reference,” he adds. 

Alex looks down, pushing his hair back behind an ear. “Uh, yes, absolutely,” he says. 

“Noted,” Dan hums. “Well, if you want some real food, I’m gonna have some cereal.” He drops a kiss to the nape of Phil’s neck just before pulling away to return to the kitchen. 

Alex stands, uncertain, in the doorway of his room. Phil watches, unsure what he’s hoping for. 

Alex sets the basket down inside of his bedroom and straightens up a bit. “Uh, cereal sounds good,” he says. 

Phil smiles, and it’s just what Phil was hoping for when Alex follows him out to the kitchen. 

~•~•~ 

Dan and Phil have a company meeting after only a week and a half of Alex living with them. 

These first days have been surprisingly good. Alex has spent the majority of his time in his room, but he’s come out for meals. He has responded to conversations started with him by either Dan or Phil. On a few occasions, he’s inserted his own opinion into conversation or brought up his own anecdote. He’s played with Pooh in the backyard, wandered about the neighborhood for a bit to get used to his surroundings, and FaceTimed his friends late into the night. 

He seems like a good kid. 

The meeting shouldn’t take long, an hour or so spent there and only about 10 minutes to get there and back. Still, they’re hesitant to both go, leaving Alex alone here. 

On one hand, as Dan brings up, it might be good to let Alex feel out the house alone and get his bearings. It could be a nice gesture of trust early on in their relationship with him. On the other hand, as Phil counters, their privacy is important, Alex’s safety is important, and they don’t know Alex extremely well yet. While they both know Alex is a good kid, sometimes good kids do stupid things, especially when they’re emotional and surrounded by change. 

Dan offers to stay home. Phil says that’s silly. They both have new designs to work on, so if Dan doesn’t want to go, they might as well just reschedule. It’s easier for the crew to meet once. 

They decide to ask Alex. 

“Oh, Alex?” Phil calls, catching Alex exiting the bathroom. 

Alex turns to him. “Yeah?” he asks in a mumble. 

“Dan and I have a meeting tomorrow afternoon, do you mind being here alone for an hour and a half or so? If you do, that’s fine. We can reschedule.” 

Alex takes a second to think. “Uh, yeah. No, that’s fine,” he says. 

“Okay, thank you,” Phil says with a smile. 

Alex walks away, and Phil turns to Dan. “So?” 

“I don’t know,” Dan says. 

“I mean, what can one kid get up to in just two hours?” Phil asks, tone of voice unsure as his paranoia provides answers to the question. 

“I’ll just…hide the booze,” Dan says. 

“He won’t—” 

“I did.”  

“Fine,” Phil says. “And we can text to check up on him.” 

“Yeah. And we can come right back after.” 

“You really weren’t joking about those helicopter mum instincts.” 

Dan shoves Phil. “Shut up,” he says, chuckling a bit, nonetheless. 

~•~•~ 

They walk back through the door of the flat. Dan’s backpack is slung over his shoulder, and he’s wondering if five times is perhaps too many times to check in with a teenager over the course of an hour and a half. Whatever , he thinks. They’re learning, and Alex seems to be being patient with them. Phil goes quickly to the toilet and Dan walks into the flat behind him. 

The home is silent, and Dan puts his stuff down in the lounge. He peeks into Alex’s room, finding it empty. He frowns, taking off his jacket and walking into his and Phil’s room. He stops with a start when he finds Alex there. Alex stands in the open closet, a piece of fabric between his fingers. He appears to be lost in thought, staring down at the fabric. His thoughts must be rather occupying for him to fail to notice Dan and Phil return home.

“Oh,” Dan says in surprise. When Alex hears Dan, he drops the fabric and jumps. He looks to Dan and curls in on himself, as if expecting some form of reprimand. The reaction tugs at Dan’s heart a bit, so he smiles gently. 

“Hey,” he teases. “You know, if you wanted the full tour you could have asked.” He had sort of expected Alex to poke around when he was left alone, and they didn’t have anything particularly private or non-child-appropriate just lying out in the open.

Alex smiles shyly, caught in the act. “I’m sorry,” he says, but his gaze drifts back to the garments hanging in the closet. 

“It’s alright,” Dan says. He gets it. He’s happy to brush it off. 

“Um,” Alex says, grabbing at a clothing article and pulling it out. It’s one of Dan’s few skirts. “Whose are these?” 

Dan scratches his head. “Uh, mine. For when I’m feeling a bit bold,” he says with a nervous grin.  

Alex seems to have thoughts zooming through his head, and Dan waits for him to sort them out. He braces for the likely ignorant response instilled into Alex by society. He knows that whatever Alex says next he likely means no harm with. 

“But, you’re a guy, aren’t you?”  

Dan just smiles again. “Well, I don’t think skirts are just a girl thing, do you?” 

Alex looks down. “I had,” he says.  

“I don’t think they are.” 

Alex is quiet for a second, but Dan can tell he’s trying to form words, so Dan waits.  

“So…” he asks, “I could…I could wear a—a skirt and still be a guy?”  

Dan smiles at him, trying to find his eyes beneath his messy hair. He senses that this is deeper than a casual conversation on gender roles. This means something to Alex, and Dan wants nothing more than to encourage the kid.  

“Alex,” he says softly, “You can do anything and be anything you want to. All these rules that society has? They’re just pretend. We don’t have to follow them if we don’t want to.” 

Alex nods. He takes in a breath through his mouth and then walks past Dan and out of the bedroom. Dan just hopes he said the right thing. 

He thinks that maybe he did when he finds one of his skirts missing from the closet a while later. Though, he reminds himself that he should probably have a chat with Alex about privacy once he’s fully settled in. There are a few things hidden in this room that a teenager does not need to see. 

~•~•~ 

Dan brings the shopping spree idea back up gently. Alex has been sleeping in an average room of neutral colors for nearly two weeks, and Dan wants this place to feel like home.  

He knows as well as he can that Alex is planning for non-permanence. Dan, on the other hand, is hoping for Alex to be something permanent in their lives. It’s wishful thinking after only a month of having Alex around, but when summer ends Dan wants to check him into a secondary school down the road and keep him around. 

He taps on the door to Alex’s room, carrying his laptop. The door is open, and Alex is on his own laptop. He looks over at Dan.  

“Hey, did you ever think of anything you want for your room?” Dan asks. 

“Oh, uh, I—I dunno,” Alex says, looking up. 

“Ah, come on, humor me. It can be anything. Mini fridge. Life-size cardboard cut-out of Nick Jonas. A lamp,” Dan says, grinning. 

Alex smiles but shrugs, looking away from Dan the second they make eye contact. 

“Alright, what’s something you like?” Dan asks. 

“Like, just, anything that I like?” 

“Yeah. Anything.” 

Alex looks down, quiet for a few moments. “I dunno,” he says eventually. 

“Please, I bet you thought of a hundred things just then,” Dan teases. 

Alex looks down, smiling in a bashful sort of way. It’s endearing, Dan has decided, though he hopes that Alex becomes more comfortable around him saying whatever he wants to say. 

“Flowers?” he says, and it comes out like a question. 

“Alright, flowers,” Dan repeats, nodding. “Any particular type of flower?” 

“Uh, roses, I guess.” 

“Roses. Alright. Noted,” Dan says with a smile. “You may continue with your browsing.” 

Dan returns to the lounge and types “rose knick-knacks” into the search bar. 

~•~•~ 

They’re watching The Great British Baking Show on the couch. Phil’s head has just found the perfect place to rest against Dan’s shoulder when Alex comes into the lounge. He says nothing and sits on the floor beside the couch. Phil can’t help but watch as he sets a drawing pad and pencil on the coffee table, flipping through dozens of pages for a new one.  

Phil lifts his head a bit, trying to see the drawings, Dan nudges him, and he realizes he’s being a bit obvious. Alex moves to start a new drawing, effectively blocking Phil’s view. He rests his head back against Dan’s shoulder and returns his attention to the show, contently aware of Alex’s presence in the room. 

Alex begins to sketch, the sound of pencil to paper drifting into the room among the various sounds of the chefs baking on TV. Phil tries a few times to sneak a glance, but he’s not in the right position to see. He doesn’t want to move either. The moment is still and calm and nice, and Phil sort of thinks that any wrong move could shatter it. 

When the episode ends and Dan moves to get up, Phil grabs his arm and pouts. Dan chuckles. “Gotta pee,” he says quietly. 

Phil hears the sound of a pencil on paper pause momentarily before continuing. He frowns and tilts his head toward Alex, trying to make his point clear. Either Dan doesn’t get it, or he does and thinks Phil is being silly. 

“I’ll be right back,” he says with a fond smile before leaving the room. 

Phil thinks he was sort-of right in his concerns. Dan has paused the show, leaving silence aside from the sketching noises, and Phil feels stupidly anxious. Alex chose to come out and sit with them. Did he want their company in silence? Was he hoping to find a chance to talk?  

Phil looks over and sees his drawing. Phil’s often easily impressed, but this sketch is no doubt impressive. In the time it had taken for the final round of baking to complete, Alex had drawn this.  

It appears to be a flower crown. Each flower within the crown is detailed down to the creases of the petals. There are leaves, roses, tulips, flowers that Phil can’t name. It’s impressive. 

“Wow,” Phil hears himself say. 

Alex glances up, noticing Phil’s gaze on his work. He pushes his hair behind his ear and blushes. “Thanks,” he says softly, the last bit of the word barely audible. 

“That’s so pretty,” Phil says. “You’re really talented.” 

Alex looks down, obviously holding back a smile. “Thank you,” he says. “I, uh, I think I’m gonna try and draw a girl to wear it. She’ll be facing that way, I reckon,” he says, illustrating what he means with gestures. 

“Yeah? That’s so cool,” Phil says. “Do you have some other drawings in there?” he asks, reaching to flip to the next page. Alex allows him to do so. 

“Yeah, this thing’s pretty filled up,” he says. His voice is still quiet, but it’s excited. Phil wonders when the last time someone engaged with his interests was.

“Can I see?” Phil asks. 

Alex pushes the pad toward him. 

Phil flips through the pad, pausing to take in each of the drawings, complimenting them. He stops at a few; when Alex has stories associated. An image of an evil hellhound looking creature. He explains that it’s an artist rendition of something he and his former foster sister are certain they saw up in the countryside one night. A young woman in a wedding dress that Alex identifies as his birth mother, based on the only picture he had of her. She has long hair, and it’s dark and a bit curly. It’s much like Alex’s. When Phil gets to more recent ones, Alex stops him. He’s landed on a page filled with faces, bright red lips on each of them. Phil doesn’t get a good look before Alex is gently taking the book back. 

“That’s really amazing, Alex,” Phil says. 

“Thank you,” Alex says, returning to the flower crown page. 

“Let me know when you fill that thing up,” Phil says. “We’ll run get you another.”  

Phil feels like he’s been offering Alex a lot of material items so far, but he finds that gift-giving is an easy love language to default to early in a relationship. Besides, he wants Alex to know that he can ask for the things he wants or needs. 

Dan returns, citing laundry as what had taken him so long. He tucks himself back into the couch crease and plays the next episode. Phil sits down beside him again, and Alex keeps drawing. It’s cozy, and Phil is so very happy that Alex is here. 

~•~•~

The days seem to pass quicker, and Alex works his way into their daily life. They smile at each other in the morning, passing around the cereal box. Alex begins to pin his drawings above the desk in his room. Flowers mainly, some figures, angel wings, girls with red lips and long hair. He entertains Pooh with fetch and too many treats, until he’s most definitely the dog’s new favorite. Dan and Phil talk among themselves as always, and Alex comments on their anecdotes and giggles. Alex is filled with stories, and Dan and Phil enjoy trying to get as many out of him as they can. Some of them have them in fits of laughter. Alex seems to like listening to stories as well, and Dan and Phil both certainly have many to tell. 

One night in the lounge, Dan and Phil watch the newest episodes of a teen drama that’s not very good at all but entertaining enough. They sit close on the couch, Pooh lying between them. Alex continues to sneak glances at them as he draws, and when he’s finished, he bashfully shows them his work. 

He’s drawn the two men and Pooh, in a simple abstract line art style, as they were sat against each other on the couch. Dan dramatically fawns over it, thanking Alex for allowing them to be his muse. It ends up with them all giggling as Dan pins the drawing to the kitchen fridge. 

“I’m not ten, you know,” Alex says. 

“Alex, this is the highest level of praise for fine art what do you—” Phil cracks partially through his argument, giggling. “What do you mean?” 

Alex giggles as well. “Is it?” He points to a sticky note, already pinned up. It’s a poorly done doodle of a dinosaur. “Is this an original, then?” 

“That, my friend, is an original Phil Lester,” Phil says. 

“I—I’m humbled to be displayed, uh, displayed beside such a masterpiece,” Alex says through giggles, and everything feels warm. 

~•~•~ 

Dan leaves the object on the dresser just inside Alex’s bedroom. It’s a decorative lamp, in the style of a tree, and at the end of every branch is a blooming rosebud. It’s a bit girly; he hopes it isn’t too much. It sort-of reminds Dan of Alex, though. 

The soft glow. The simple beauty. The bright flowers blooming from darkly colored limbs. 

He hopes Alex will like it. 

A little later, he notices that it’s been set on the center of Alex’s desk, beneath his drawings. It’s plugged in and turned on, and Dan hopes he got it right. 

~•~•~ 

Dan notices that his skirt still hasn't returned to his closet, as he grabs a pair of pants. He tries not to think about it too much. Such ambiguous communication is just begging for overthinking and paranoia. Unless Alex wants him to notice… He shakes his head, and he keeps his mind set on the obvious answer. Alex is messing around with his expression. He’s at an age where everything is changing and he’s just discovering who he is, and Dan wants him to explore it. He doesn’t want to put words in Alex’s mouth, though. He doesn’t want to draw his own conclusions just yet. 

Phil, perhaps a bit more oblivious to the non-direct communication between Dan and Alex, doesn’t seem to feel the same. 

“Dan?” Phil asks, standing still in the doorway after he’s closed the door. 

Dan looks up from his laptop. “Yes?” he asks, frowning at Phil’s look. He looks to be a mix of confused and worried, but not necessarily in a bad way. 

“I, uh, I think Alex has been using that make-up. Under the counter? Unless you’ve been using it secretly,” Phil says. 

Dan sits up. “I haven’t used it in ages,” he says. 

“I’ve just noticed the removal wipes in the bin and I just found it left out in the bathroom. So, if you’re not using it…” 

“I’m not,” Dan agrees. 

“So, Alex must be?” 

“Huh,” Dan says. Odd of Alex to leave it out where they would be able to notice. Again, Dan wonders if the kid wants them to notice.

“Yeah.”

“Is…that a problem?” He means it to sound a bit more assertive, but it comes out uncertain. 

“Of course not,” Phil assures.

There’s a beat of silence between them. Dan’s not exactly sure why Phil seems nervous, but it’s making him nervous. 

“Okay?” he says, unsure. 

There’s another beat of silence, and Dan knows he’s not making it easy on Phil. He can’t help being a bit defensive over stereotypes, even though he knows that Phil’s been through a lot with his sexuality as well, and that he gets it. 

“Dan?” Phil asks finally. 

“What?” 

“Do you think Alex is…gay?” 

“Using makeup doesn’t make you gay, Phil,” Dan feels the need to argue, for whatever reason. 

“I know that.” Of course, he does. 

“Then what do you mean?” 

“You know what I mean.” 

Dan does know what he means. Of course, makeup, which is essentially a collection of pigmented substances that one applies to the face, has no relation to sexuality in the precise sense. Still, they both know that it’s a bit more likely for a gay man to experiment with it than a straight one. Besides, Alex has come to live with two openly gay men. It’s not impossible that he’s mimicking what he reads to be the norm for gay men.

“What does it matter to us?” Dan asks.  

Phil seems confused by the question, taking a moment to reply. “He—he’s part of our family now, right? If he’s going through the mess of discovering his identity or trying to figure out his—his self-expression, I want to be there for him.” 

Dan deflates because it’s a valid sentiment. He knows that if Alex is queer in some way, that he’ll face his own struggles with that. He wants to be there for him too. 

“Or maybe it’s just us?” Phil says. “I mean, he’s come to live with two very openly gay men. He’s probably been watching our videos, and this could be the first time he’s, like, seen this stuff in a positive way. Maybe he just wants to experiment with it because it’s okay to do that here, if that makes sense.” 

Dan nods. “What if…” he trails off. Venturing into the confusing and scary realm of gender identity is too big a leap to make with the information at hand. Besides, even if Dan’s right, it’s none of his business. Dan himself went through a phase of gender questioning. In the long run, he found himself more apathetic to gender, if anything. Alex never has to talk about it, not if he doesn’t feel the need to. “Well,” he says. “We’ll let him know that we’re here for him no matter what, yeah?” 

Phil smiles, and he seems a bit less nervous having talked it out. “Yeah,” he agrees. “Yeah.” 

This is what comes with having kids around. With having Alex around. Alex is very much still a kid, just beginning to find out who he really is, and Dan and Phil have to try their best to encourage him. Dan wants this so badly. This family. Alex. 

So, Dan stops briefly in Alex’s doorway when they go to bid him good night. He knows that Alex doesn’t sleep until much later. It’s summer, and he’s a teenager. Still, they’ve made a habit of saying goodnight before the two of them turn in for the night. 

“Hey, Alex,” he says, “Phil and I, we, uh, want you to know that you can tell us anything. If you want to. It will stay between us three.” 

Alex inhales audibly, and Dan almost regrets the words. The sentiment is nice, but it feels heavy even as Dan says it. Phil helpfully diffuses the tension with a joking remark. 

“Unless you’re like a cannibal or something. That might call for outside intervention,” Phil says. 

Alex smiles at this. “Thank you,” is all he says. 

Alex knows that Dan and Phil are devoted life partners, and he knows a bit about their sexuality journeys. If he wants their help, he will come to them. Dan consoles himself with this, and he and Phil bid Alex goodnight. 

~•~•~ 

Things are going well. Alex agrees to come out to the shops with Dan, and they end up buying loads of trinkets and decorations for his bedroom. They sit and chat over lunch, and Dan hears about some of Alex’s friends and old foster siblings. As the days pass, he continues to interact more and more comfortably with Dan and Phil. 

Dan asks the school down the street for enrollment paperwork. He and Phil still have to talk to Alex about it and then confer with his social worker before they can fill it out, provided Alex wants to stay, but...

Dan thinks that Alex is going to stay.

He’s excited.

Alex is sweet, funny, smart, and talented, and Dan wants to have the privilege of seeing him grow into the person he’s meant to be. 

Walking down the hallway, Dan decides to peek into Alex’s room to ask if he has any requests for dinner. “Hey—” he says, stopping when he sees Alex. 

Alex is lying on the floor, staring blankly at the ceiling. It’s a familiar position to Dan, if he’s honest, and that’s why it concerns him. 

“Hey,” he says again, softer. “You okay?” 

Alex shrugs, pulling himself into a sitting position. He rests his chin in his hand and looks down at he carpet. Dan enters the room cautiously. 

“Want to talk about it?” Dan asks. 

Alex noticeably takes in a breath. “I…I don’t…” he trails off. “It’s just…Have you—” Alex is obviously struggling to find words, and Dan sits down on the carpet beside him, waiting patiently. 

“H-have you ever—You—you’re gay, right?” he blurts out. 

Dan holds back a laugh at this, smiling. “How’d you guess?” he teases.

Alex looks down, taking a deep breath. “Have you ever met a transgender person?” he asks quickly. 

Oh . Dan tries to keep his own surprise at the question undetectable.

“I have,” he says quietly. “Plenty of times.” 

“And you…you think that those people are, like, okay?” Alex asks. 

“Of course, I do,” Dan says, voice soft and careful. “Everyone has the right to exist in a way that makes them happy. Everyone has the right to be who they are and live their truth.” 

Alex’s breathing begins to stutter, and then he’s breaking down into tears. 

“Alex,” Dan asks softly. “Are you transgender?” He immediately regrets asking so bluntly.

Alex lets out a soft sob and shrugs his shoulders. 

“That’s okay,” Dan promises quickly. “That’s okay if you don’t know. If you are, that’s fine. If you’re not sure, that’s fine. If you’re not, that’s fine. It’s all fine.” 

Alex leans into Dan, forehead falling against Dan’s shoulder, to Dan’s surprise. Dan hesitantly wraps an arm around his back as Alex cries. It’s a bit awkward, but it’s physical touch and Alex has initiated it. 

“I—” Alex starts, wiping his nose on the sleeve of his shirt. “I had a foster sister and she—she used to do make-up for me. We’d—we’d do my hair and make me l-look like a girl. Then our—our foster dad or whatever, he caught us doing it and—and—” Alex’s sobs get louder, his breathing more rushed. 

Dan strokes a hand over his back, trying to calm the kid. He doesn’t say anything, waiting for Alex to gather himself and finish. 

“—He, you know, beat the shit out of me. T-told me he wouldn’t have a ‘tranny fairy’ living in his home or whatever.” Done with his story, Alex dissolves into soft sobs. 

“Oh,” Dan breathes. “Oh, Alex, I’m sorry. That’s—Listen, that man was wrong, yeah? In every conceivable way. He was an abuser and a bigot, and you didn’t deserve that, okay? I’m so sorry that you had to go through that.”  

It’s then that Alex properly wraps his arms around Dan, burying his face in Dan’s shoulder. Dan rubs his back as he continues to cry, realizing that it’s likely been a while since Alex has received any sort of physical affection. 

“Oh, dear…” Dan murmurs. “You know that nothing like that will ever happen to you here, don’t you?” 

Alex nods against Dan’s shoulder. “I—I was hoping, s-since you and Phil were b-both…” he trails off, tears taking over again. 

“I think I’m trans,” he cries. 

Dan wants to ask about pronouns, to ask about expression, and to offer relentless support. This already seems like so much for Alex, though, so he just hugs Alex a little tighter. “Okay,” he says softly. 

He stays like that, letting the kid cry against his shoulder until he’s out of tears. 

“I just…” Alex says quietly. “I just—I’ve never felt like a boy. I don’t know. I don’t know what I am but it’s not—it’s not a boy. And I was too s-scared to even think about it with m-my dad and e-everyone, but I don’t wanna be—I’m not a boy.” 

“Hey,” Dan says, pulling back a bit to meet Alex’s eyes. “You don’t have to be. You don’t have to be a boy.” 

Alex pushes their hair back behind both ears and brings a hand up to wipe their cheeks. They look to Dan with wide eyes filled with hope, relief, fear, and admiration all at once, and Dan feels just a bit undeserving of so many of Alex’s emotions. 

“You’re you,” Dan says softly, and he’s thinking about when he came out to his mum. “If you stick around, Phil and I, we’re gonna love you for being you, no matter how that looks, okay?” 

Alex manages to nod before burying his face in his hands. “Thank you,” he says. 

Dan decides to postpone the conversation about school. It’s just a bit more complicated now, but they have time to sort everything out. Dan wants Alex to take his time in sorting everything out. 

So, for dinner, Dan orders Domino’s. Phil doesn’t question it, changing into his pajamas and joining them. From the way that Alex sits closer to Dan and seems just a bit drained, Dan’s sure Phil can infer well enough why this evening called for Domino’s. 

~•~•~ 

“Alex?” Dan asks softly, peeking his head into Alex’s room before bed. 

“Yeah?” Alex lays in bed, clad in pajama pants and an oversized t-shirt. They’re texting someone, only looking up once they’ve sent a reply. 

Dan leans against the doorframe. “I was wondering if you were okay with me talking to Phil about our conversation earlier, or if you wanted to talk to him yourself, or if you’d rather I just leave it alone. I’m only asking because I’m used to talking about everything with Phil,” he says with a chuckle. “But I won’t say anything to him that you don’t want me to.” 

Alex pushes a strand of hair behind their ear. “Uh, do you think…is he going to be, like, understanding?” 

Dan nearly snorts. “Do you think that I, the mess of an ambiguous identity that is Dan, could spend 15 years of my life with someone who wasn’t utterly supportive and understanding?” he asks, grinning a little. “He absolutely will be. I know it’s not the same, but he was there for me all those years ago when I struggled with my identity. You couldn’t ask for a more supportive person.” 

Alex nods. “You can tell him,” they say. 

“You’re sure?” 

“Yeah. I trust you.” 

The words hit a bit harder than Dan would have expected, in the absolute best way. ‘ I trust you .’ Alex, the kid who tried their best to avoid eye contact, sometimes flinched when someone moved too quickly, and felt the need to hide their identity, trusted Dan. 

Dan smiles. “Thank you,” he says quietly.  

~•~•~ 

“I talked to Alex today,” Dan says, climbing into bed beside Phil. Phil is wearing his glasses, and he has a book open. The bedside lamp is on. Dan’s oddly endeared by it, as it’s such an easy domestic thing. Phil reading before bed, and Dan going to bed with him most days. It sort of makes him feel like an old man, but he sort of likes their new functional adult schedule. It’s a very “dads” thing to do.

He’s not entirely sure how he’s meant to describe their relationship to Alex. Are they parents, now? He ultimately wants Alex to come to their own conclusion, but Dan wants to be a parent, and he thinks that Phil does too. They also wanted to, and had decided to, foster and maybe adopt an older kid, and with that comes letting said kid take the lead a bit. It’s up to Alex if they’re parents, or something like mentors, or just a home to crash in. Dan’s not doing a wonderful job of avoiding hope that he can be a parent to Alex, though.

“I gathered,” Phil says, setting his book down to give Dan his full attention. “Is he alright?”

“I think so. Um.” Dan sits back against the pillows, trying to sort out the best way to explain everything to Phil. His first instinct is to walk on eggshells with it, before he remembers who he’s talking to. For the fifteen years he’s known Phil, he’s never had to worry about judgement from him, and he’ll give Alex the same treatment. “He— they told me, um. We talked about gender and stuff for a little. Basically, they said they’re not sure where they are identity-wise, but they’re not a boy.”

Phil shuffles to sit up. “Oh. Oh . So, Alex is transgender?”

“Yeah, I think so. Alex said that when he—when they —experimented with it in their old foster home their foster dad beat them.” Dan speaks with a hush, despite being inside their bedroom with the door closed.

“Oh. Oh, god , that’s—You told him—uh, them?”

“I didn’t get a chance to ask about pronouns. They, uh, seemed pretty shaken up already, so I didn’t want to push anything. But they were pretty adamant that they weren’t a boy.”

“Okay. But you told Alex that they’re safe here with us?” Phil asks.

“Yeah, of course. I told them that it’s okay to question, and that we’ll support them no matter what, and that what their foster dad did wasn’t okay. Alex said that I could tell you about it, too.”

“Wow. Okay. Did you ask them if they wanted to see about reporting their old foster dad so he doesn’t keep being allowed to foster children?” Phil asks.

“No. It was a lot for them to talk about. They—I even got a hug out of them. They were really emotional, so I think we should probably let it be for a little bit. I think…I think they’ll tell us whatever they want us to know.”

“Right. Okay. You told them that I’d be, like, fine with it all, right?”

“Yeah, yeah. I told them.”

Phil nods, having closed his book at some point during the conversation. “Should I be more or less anxious about this?” he asks, laughing a bit, as he often does when discussing sensitive topics. Dan knows how to distinguish genuine Phil laughter from nervous and unsure Phil laughter easily by now. 

“It’s big,” Dan says. “We don’t know, really, how it’s going to affect their life here with us, but we’ll cross that bridge when we come to it, yeah? Alex just needs to know we’re here for them, because I think we’re the first, like, adults they’ve really told.”

Phil nods. “Yeah. Yes, right.”

Dan sends Phil a smile, and he feels his nerves die down. Everything’s going to be okay. There’s something wonderful to be said about Alex feeling comfortable enough to come out to Dan. Phil feels privileged to be let in on who Alex really is.

~•~•~

Alex doesn’t talk to Phil about it, nor do they mention anything more to Dan in the days that follow. Phil tries his best to subtly offer support, but he’s sure his attempts at subtlety are lame at best. Especially when he sees a small trans pride flag at the shops among others and brings it home to display on the kitchen counter. It seems to get his point across, though. London pride was a few weeks ago, and he wonders if Alex knows.

Alex glances at the flag as they sit across the bar.

“I think I’m a girl,” Alex says, and it’s so quiet that Phil barely catches it. He does, though, and he’s glad. He’s surprised, having expected Alex to go to Dan with more information before Phil. 

Phil looks up at Alex and smiles. “Yeah?” he asks as if they’ve spoken about this before. “Would you like me and Dan to start referring to you differently?” 

Alex smiles and looks down, hair falling into their face. “Uh, maybe, yeah.” 

“Alright,” Phil says, dipping his butter knife back into the almost-empty jam jar. “She-her or something else?” 

“You would be okay with ‘she?’” Alex asks. 

Phil spreads the last bit of jam over his toast and looks up again. “Of course. But it doesn’t matter what Dan and I are okay with; it matters what you’re okay with.” He sets the empty jam jar in the sink, too lazy to rinse it out despite knowing Dan will nag him about it later. 

“Okay. She-her would be nice, then.” Alex smiles again, the soft and bashful kind. She pushes her hair behind her ear, and Phil smiles at getting to see one of her stunning green eyes. Alex tends to hide them behind long bangs. 

“Great!” Phil says, taking a bite of toast. He swallows his mouthful of bread before adding. “Feel free to correct me if I mess up, also. I won’t mind. Dan won’t either.” 

“Thank you,” Alex says. 

~•~•~ 

The days continue to pass as they had been. Alex sharing stories, watching tv shows with them, telling Dan and Phil about some of the foster siblings she keeps in touch with. Dan and Phil promise that they’ll help Alex visit them when they can. Alex seems more talkative now, less withdrawn. Dan hopes she will stay this way around them, because he’s really starting to love hearing her thoughts. 

Over dinner one night, Dan asks about school. 

Alex smiles the widest smile they’ve yet to see grace her face. “You want me to stay?” she asks. 

“Yeah, mate,” Dan says with a grin. “We’ve gotten a bit attached to you, I think.” 

Alex stands and she begins to ramble, speaking more than either of them have heard her speak at once. She mentions talking to her social worker, mentions starting fresh, mentions texting her old foster siblings about this. She says she’s glad that she won’t have to take down the decorations in her room, that she can go to school in London, and that she doesn’t have to go back to the foster home she lived in before this. 

“And I get to stay with Pooh!” she concludes, and Dan and Phil chuckle. 

She hugs them both, mumbling ‘thank you’s in a manner that’s just too sincere. Dan thinks he’s found an entirely new version of fondness and he kind of wants to feel it forever. 

They talk to the social worker. 

They fill in the enrollment papers. Dan leaves the ‘preferred name’ slot blank, and he sets the papers aside for now, assuring Alex that they can come back to it after giving it some thought. She’s not sure if she wants to be out at school, doesn’t quite know how to be out at all, so Dan and Phil want to give her a while to think about it.

Alex stays. 

~•~•~ 

Phil feels warm when Alex approaches him and Dan one night. She’s past the point of shying away from Dan and Phil, but she’s still been hesitant to go to them for anything, so this feels a little bit big. 

“Dan? Phil?” she asks, tapping on the door. 

Dan looks up from his laptop and grins. “What’s up?” 

Alex walks through the door, and she’s holding a pad and pen. “I wanted your help with something,” she says quietly. 

“Shoot,” Phil says, setting aside his own laptop. 

“I, uh, I was thinking about names. For me. If I end up wanting to change it,” she says. “I wanted your input.” 

“Ooo,” says Phil. 

Dan rubs his hands together and sits up. “Yes okay. What have you got?” 

“I want to preface this by saying she looks like something cool like ‘Skylar’ or ‘Raven,’” Phil says, announcing the names in a slightly deeper and scratchier voice. 

“ What ?” Dan asks, voice moving higher. 

Phil just laughs. “Come on! She’s got the dark hair, she’d suit it.”

Alex smiles, looking down. 

“She doesn’t—okay.” Dan looks to Alex. “Did either of those names sound good to you?” 

Alex giggles a bit. “No, not really.” 

Dan looks at Phil, who pouts. “Yeah. No.” Dan turns back to Alex. “I feel like you need something softer, you know what I mean? Like, something pretty, I reckon.” 

Alex blushes at this, reaching to push her hair behind her ear. “Yeah?” she asks. 

“Well, okay, have you got some ideas?” Dan asks. 

Alex nods, looking down at her notepad.

“Okay, read those to us,” Phil says, sitting forward to listen. 

“Okay, uh…” Alex begins shakily reading out names.  

Audrey. Dan and Phil glance thoughtfully at one and other, before nodding for Alex to continue. 

Renee. It’s nice because it can sound feminine and neutral, Dan mentions. 

Ally. Alex doesn’t seem to like it much, but she mentions that it works as a nickname for her birth name.

Rose. 

“That one might be kind of silly,” Alex adds softly. 

“Wait,” Dan says, looking to Phil, who looks back at him with the same sort of expression. It’s a bit obvious but… 

“Is that…” Phil starts, then looks at Alex again, looking her over. 

“Okay, is it just me or is Rose literally perfect?” Dan asks, looking back to Alex again. 

Alex blushes as Dan and Phil look her over. 

“I really like Rose!” Phil says. 

“You think?” Alex asks. 

“No, I—I actually think that’s perfect, oh my god,” Dan says. “Do you like it?” 

Alex nods. “I really like it,” she says. 

“You are absolutely a Rose, mate. No question,” Dan decides. 

Phil giggles. “Only if you want to be, though. Don’t let Dan peer pressure you,” he teases. 

“I was hoping you’d like Rose,” she said. 

“Do you want us to call you Rose, then?” Dan asks, grinning. He’s aware he might be channeling overly supportive parent vibes, and he’s absolutely okay with it. 

“Um. Yeah. I think so. This…this is a lot,” she says with a breathy laugh. 

“It is. It is. Sorry if you feel like we’re rushing you,” Phil says. “You don’t have to stick with Rose or with she-her or anything.” 

“Yeah,” Dan chimes in. “We just want you to know it’s all okay.” 

“I know,” Rose says. “I’m just…not used to that,” she says. 

Dan grins. “Well you better get used to it, bub.” 

~•~•~ 

“You’re sure about this?” Phil asks, looking up at Rose.  

They’ve spoken about it at length. About how their audience will most likely take this and run with it, in a well-intentioned but overwhelming sort of way. About the fact that Rose will pretty much be outed to anyone with an internet connection if they do this. And about how there are so many lovely people, but there will always be those with negativity to spread. 

It’s been months. Dan and Phil have done little more than mention Rose vaguely and in passing. They’ve explained their position on privacy and family life. Rose’s comfort and privacy will always come first. Everyone had generally been understanding and lovely, but they can tell that their audience’s curiosity is only growing. 

They’re sure that Rose is going to stick around now. She’s begun attending school as Rose, with the perhaps over-the-top support of Dan and Phil. They’ve begun looking into adoption, though that will take quite some time. Her room is filled with decorations and photographs. She no longer hesitates to ask for what she needs and wants. She’s settled into their family.

So, it feels a bit right to introduce her properly to their part of the world. They won’t be making any content featuring Rose anytime soon, but this way they don’t have to dance around her existence when they talk about their daily lives.

Rose is adamant that she wants this, and that she wants be introduced properly without having to spend anymore time in the closet. She’s fourteen, nearly fifteen. She’s too young to be put directly in the limelighT, but old enough that Dan and Phil don’t want to entirely dismiss her desire to be a part of this. This is Dan and Phil’s world, and she’s expressed that she wants to be as apart of their world as they are hers.

So, after days of talking it over both with and without Rose, they decide on a simple introduction.  

“You guys’ll have my back, right?” Rose asks, smiling a little. 

“Of course,” Dan replies quickly. 

“Absolutely,” Phil says. 

“And this doesn’t mean you have to start interacting with them. You can set your own boundaries, yeah?” Dan adds, for the third time today.

“I know,” Rose says quietly. She takes Phil’s phone from his hand, looking down at the photo of the three of them. 

It was a self that Dan had taken, just in the flat. Rose’s hair is pulled into a ponytail, and a shorter curly strand falls from it into her face. She wears a loose black t-shirt. She holds a happy-looking Pooh up in her arms like a baby, and her nails are painted black, courtesy of Dan. She smiles brightly at the camera. It’s a smile that neither Dan nor Phil could have imagined her giving when she first showed up at their place. Phil’s arm is wrapped around her, and he and Dan also give the camera wide smiles. 

It’s Phil’s Instagram, and the caption to the post reads: 

family portrait 🐶🌹 

*Royal trumpets play* Officially welcoming Rose to the fam! Pooh already likes her more than Dan and I so we're glad she’s sticking around  

Rose presses post. She exhales. 

“Oh,” Dan says laughing. “Alright.” 

The comments immediately start rolling in. “Yay!!!” and “oh my fucking god ?????” and “aaa you’re all so cute!!” and “congrats you guys!” 

Dan looks over Rose’s shoulder, and he notices as her eyes drift over the comments catching on a specific one and then darting to the ones like it. 

“ She’s so pretty! ” 

“ oh my god she’s so gorgeous ” 

“ Rose is so pretty!!!! ” 

Rose reaches up to wipe her eyes, and Dan looks over, surprised to see her crying. He gently takes the phone and sets it down. Phil sits down beside Rose and rests a hand on her back, looking at her concerned. 

“Hey, hey,” Dan speaks quickly. “Is this okay?” They should have waited. Shit. This is too much. This is too fast. Fuck. Shit. 

Rose lets out a sob that sounds as if it’s mixed with a laugh, and Dan’s confused. She leans into Phil, who takes a moment in his surprise to wrap his arms around her. “Rose?” he asks softly. 

“What is it?” Dan asks quietly. They can delete the picture, but it’s most likely already been screenshotted and shared and seen by so many people. God, they should have waited. Dan’s about to apologize when Rose says something. 

“They’re so nice,” she cries. 

Phil chuckles, pushing her hair back. “What?” 

“They’re all so nice,” she says again. “A bunch of people said I’m pretty.” 

Dan smiles. “You are pretty.” 

Rose lets out a laugh-sob. “Shut up.” She reaches up to wipe her tears. “I’m not—no one’s—no one’s ever been that nice to me.” 

Phil chuckled again, pulling back a bit so that Rose looks up and meets his eyes. “You’re gonna have to get used to it, staying with us.” 

Rose pulls back and looks between Dan and Phil. “Thank you,” she says. 

Dan just grins. “Welcome to the family, Rose.”