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What does a guy have to do to get a date with you?
I hope that piquing your curiosity is enough, because I'll be waiting for you tomorrow at the café you usually go at 5 p.m. <3
These words, written carefully in a green card that Polnareff had slipped through the vents of Kakyoin's locker on that Valentine's Day. Green, because it was Kakyoin's favorite color, and he wanted to show him that whoever this mysterious person was, they knew something about him, like choosing his favorite café. Kakyoin was very reserved, and maybe knowing that the person who wrote it wasn't a total stranger would increase the probability of success. Or it would made him think he had a stalker.
Polnareff played those words in his head over and over while he was in class. Were they good enough? Could he have worded it better? Did he sound like a creep? Would Kakyoin even care? He got cards like these every year, and he never paid attention to them. Why would it be any different? And even if he did care and went along with it, how would he react when he saw that it was Polnareff who wrote it? Would he even want to have the date at all?
Calm down, Jean, Polnareff told himself. It's not like it's the first time you do this.
And it wasn't. Polnareff had been sending cards to his crushes on Valentine's Day for years already, and he even got a date or two out of it. But his crushes were usually just people he talked to sometimes, or even a friend, but never had he ended up head over heels for his best and closest friend. And the outcomes could be disastrous.
The truth is Polnareff wasn't planning on confessing his feelings at all, but he eventually figured he liked Kakyoin a little too much to hide it forever. He had to try, and he would be very happy if it all worked out, but if Kakyoin didn't want anything with him, then... well, maybe hearing it from him would help his feelings die down.
He just didn't know if he was ready to hear it.
The bell rang, and Polnareff was startled out of his thoughts to realize he had been staring at his desk, barely blinking, the whole class. Kakyoin sat right in front of him, so hopefully he didn't notice him acting different, but Jotaro who sat in the other row, beside him, surely did, if his questioning glances when they all got up said something.
“Man, this class was so boring I spaced out for most of it,” Polnareff said to his friends, trying to act as natural as he could as they prepared to leave the room together.
“That explains how you stayed quiet for so long. That's a rare thing,” Kakyoin teased, which got a small chuckle from Jotaro. Polnareff stuck his tongue out at him playfully in response.
They talked for a while as they walked towards their lockers. Mostly Kakyoin and Jotaro, because Polnareff was too busy freaking out while trying to keep his composure. Every step closer to the lockers was a step closer to Kakyoin finding his card, which he had overthought so much that was now sure it was stupid, ridiculous and that Kakyoin would probably laugh at it.
When they reached their destination, which felt like an eternity, Polnareff had his heart on his throat. Yet he had to act cool, or he would just give himself away and ruin the whole purpose of the card. They all went to their respective lockers. Polnareff opened his and found nothing but his own things. Which was fine, since he only had one person in mind and he doubted said person was the kind to send cute messages on Valentine's Day. But it was always a nice boost to his ego when he found something for him.
Both him and Kakyoin turned around when they heard the sound of a bunch of paper hitting the ground, along with an annoyed grunt. Jotaro had just opened his locker to be met with a small avalanche of cards and letters falling on the ground before him. He started picking them up as his friends laughed.
“Damn, I didn't get a single one and Jotaro got thirty,” Polnareff complained jokingly.
Jotaro didn't look very amused by that fact. “You can have them all if you want. I won't waste my time reading them anyway.”
“Truly a gentleman,” Kakyoin said ironically.
“Says the guy who calls me an idiot on a daily basis,” Polnareff said as he turned to put his things on his locker. Kakyoin only shot him a small smirk and did the same.
Polnareff had been thankful that the incident had lightened up the mood, but there was nothing that could possibly calm him down to what was about to happen. Shit, shit, shit, shit... It's now. Kakyoin took out around ten cards and letters from his locker. One of them was green, and Polnareff felt like stealing it and running away.
Kakyoin only sighed, not looking more amused than Jotaro as he put them in his backpack. Polnareff was a little more discouraged by that, but, well, it was done now. He could only wait for the results. At least he was treating them with more care than Jotaro, who was just stuffing his together inside his backpack, not minding if they got crumpled.
“Whoa, if I knew you were gonna treat them that way I would have accepted them,” Polnareff said, trying his best to get his mind out of the fact that his card was now in Kakyoin's possession.
“I'll just throw them away when I get home, so whatever.”
“So you're really not going to read them?” Kakyoin raised an eyebrow, as if disapproving of his friend's words.
Jotaro looked at him deadpanned. “Kakyoin, there's like thirty of them.”
“Still, it's a bit inconsiderate.”
“Tch, as if they really give a fuck about me.”
“Are you kidding?” Polnareff said. “These girls follow you around all the time, just hoping you'll notice them.”
“Exactly,” Kakyoin agreed, but his tone didn't match what Polnareff expected. “They hope he'll notice them to look good in front of other people, not really because they wanna get to know him. He has a point.”
The slight look of sadness in Kakyoin's eyes as he said that didn't go unnoticed by Polnareff .“Oh. Well, I guess when you think about it like that...”
“It's exactly like that,” Jotaro said as he grabbed his backpack. “I don't give a fuck about them either, so I don't care. Just wish they would stop annoying me.”
Polnareff looked at his two friends. “You guys are strange. There are so many guys hoping to have that many girls interested in them, and you're complaining.”
“Well, these guys are stupid,” Jotaro said bluntly.
Kakyoin chuckled. “I think you just called Polnareff stupid.”
“What? Hey, I'm not like that!” Polnareff protested.
“Really? You just complained that nobody left anything for you.”
“That's just– Can't I want a little boost to my self-esteem?”
“Actually, no, I don't think that would be healthy.”
Polnareff glared at him. “Are you calling me cocky?”
“If the shoe fits...” Kakyoin said, with the usual smirk he had when he was glad to be right about something.
Jotaro looked tiredly between them. “Are you done?”
“Hold up!” Polnareff lifted a hand at Kakyoin, even if it was Jotaro who had spoken. “Do you mean you think I'm one of those guys who just want to fool around and don't want anything serious?”
Kakyoin raised an eyebrow. “Why do you care so much about what I think?”
Polnareff was caught off guard. Shit. Did I mess it all up?
Kakyoin didn't seem to mind. He just sighed and continued. “I'm sorry, I shouldn't just assume things about you.”
“I-It's fine,” Polnareff shook his head, trying to recover from the small shock. “It's just that... you know, just because I come off like that doesn't mean I'm not the type of guy that wants have a serious relationship.”
Kakyoin smiled. “I know. I sort of... didn't completely believe it was like that, but... you know, sometimes I say things I don't mean.”
Polnareff nodded. “It's okay, I understand.”
“I guess I got a little mad because you didn't understand what I meant.”
“...About what?”
Kakyoin averted his gaze and looked down at his feet. “About these people who approach others with second intentions.” He paused for a while, and Polnareff wasn't sure if he should say something, so he just waited for him to continue. “Not many people care to know me for who I am, and when these people come around me like that, pretending they care only because they think they'll look good in front of others by being with me...” He sighed again, something he was doing a lot today. “I guess it just makes me feel worse about that.”
“Whoa...” Polnareff looked down apologetically. “I-I'm really sorry. I had no idea.”
Kakyoin chuckled. “Of course you hadn't.”
“Ouch, I'm here apologizing–”
Kakyoin laughed when he noticed what he said. “Wait! I'm sorry, that's not what I meant.” Polnareff tilted his head in confusion, so he explained. “I meant that you're so outgoing and easy to talk to. You can befriend anyone you want.”
“And even so, I basically only talk to you and Jotaro.”
Kakyoin eyed him analytically. “Why?”
Polnareff thought his words carefully. “Well... I'd rather have a few deep friendships than a lot of shallow ones.”
Kakyoin raised an eyebrow, with an impressed look on his face, as if surprised by his choice of words. “I guess it also proves your point about relationships.”
Yes! Polnareff thought. That was exactly the effect he was looking for. “See? Sometimes you're wrong.”
Kakyoin smirked. “But that's rare, specially if compared to you.”
Polnareff chuckled as he shook his head, as if accepting it. They both stayed there for a while, staring at their feet, just enjoying the afterglow of their conversation.
Kakyoin lifted his head suddenly. “Wait, where's Jotaro?”
They both took a look around but he was nowhere to be found. He must have sneaked out in the middle of their argument when he saw they wouldn't be finished anytime soon.
“I guess he got tired of our bullshit,” Polnareff shrugged. Kakyoin chuckled.
On the following morning, Polnareff was not okay. He had arrived home on the day before and replayed his conversation with Kakyoin in his head, glad that he could change what he thought about him. It was really cool. They had even lost track of time and of Jotaro's presence – or absence. It seemed to have gone well, a very good thing if Kakyoin really ended up accepting his date request.
Until he stopped to think about what Kakyoin had said. He said it made him feel bad seeing those people approach him just because they want something from him, and he probably would never think that someone would send him a Valentine's card with genuine interest in him.
So why would he bother reading them at all?
Sure, he had seemed disapproving when Jotaro said he was just going to throw his away, but that was before they started talking about that. It seemed that the conversation had reminded him of that fact, so it could very well change his mind about reading them.
Polnareff sighed. He didn't know what to hope for anymore. He didn't know if Kakyoin had read them or not, and if he did, would he show up at the place? And when he saw Polnareff, would he be happy or disappointed? God, he didn't even know why he had written 'tomorrow' in that card. It could all have been over already, but the truth is he wasn't ready and he thought he would be readier today. He wasn't.
There were too many questions in Polnareff's head. He kept shifting from hopeful to anxious to pessimistic and he wasn't able to do a single productive thing in class. He had even caught Jotaro giving him slightly worried glances, and that meant he was letting it show a lot. When they were eating together, Polnareff barely spoke. He forced a laugh or two, but he knew he was being too obvious, and he hated it, but he couldn't help it. It was being too hard to stay around Kakyoin not knowing what his answer would be. Or if he would give him an answer.
So by the time class was over, Polnareff took longer than his friends to get up. He needed time to know what to do. Should he say something to Kakyoin? Should he try to figure out what he had done with his cards? Or maybe he should just go home and not think about it until the time to get ready for the date he didn't even know if was going to happen. He had no idea what to do, so every movement he made was seconds longer than necessary as he desperately tried to decide something.
“Polnareff, are you okay?”
“H-Huh?” Polnareff looked up to see Kakyoin, along with Jotaro, staring at him. Everybody else had left the classroom. “What do you mean?”
“‘What do you mean?’ You've been acting weird all morning. Did something happen?” Kakyoin asked in concern.
What was he supposed to say? ‘I want to know if you'll go on a date with me but I'm too scared to ask you directly’? “I'm alright. I just got a headache.” It wasn't a total lie, but the headache was just a consequence.
There was silence for a while until Jotaro spoke up. “Uh, I'm going. I'm in a bit of a hurry.”
That was unusual. Normally Kakyoin would question it, but for some reason he didn't seem to mind. “Okay. See you tomorrow.”
“Bye,” Polnareff said shortly as Jotaro gave them a small wave and turned away. Now he was alone with Kakyoin staring at him, and he looked suspicious. “What?”
“Nothing,” Kakyoin shook his head. “Are you going to stay there?”
Polnareff fumbled with his things until they finally got out of the classroom together. Both were silent, and walking in a slow pace. Polnareff was not sure if that was supposed to calm him down, but it wasn't working. When they reached their lockers, Kakyoin spoke up.
“Didn't get anything today either?”
Polnareff was so caught up in his thoughts that it took him a while to realize that Kakyoin was talking about Valentine Day's cards. “No.”
Kakyoin nodded. He made a small pause, before he saying, “I actually followed Jotaro's advice and just threw them all away too.”
Polnareff immediately looked at him, mouth agape. He should have expected it. He kind of did, but he hoped he was wrong. Still, nothing could have saved him from the shock of hearing it from Kakyoin, feeling all his hopes being shattered with a single sentence.
Kakyoin looked at him with a raised eyebrow and an amused smile. “I'm kidding.”
Relief washed over Polnareff with the same strength as the shock from the previous moment, and he cursed himself for it. He was being so obvious, so fucking obvious, and he knew Kakyoin was too smart to let it pass.
“I actually got one that caught my attention. Someone chose one with my favorite color and asked me out on a date at the café I usually go,” Kakyoin said casually. Polnareff gulped. “Isn't that interesting?”
“I-It sure is.” That was getting a little too much for him. He had to know. “So you'll go?”
“I was thinking... I don't like these kind of things.”
Of course he doesn't, Polnareff said to himself, as he averted his gaze. That was just stupid.
“But then I thought that there is one person in particular who I think I'd like to go on a date with,” Kakyoin continued. Polnareff felt a spark of hope being relighted. Small, very small. “But what are the odds that this is the same person? So I decided it would be a risk I didn't want to take.”
“But weren't you curious?” Now he just sounded desperate. Kakyoin's expression was so amused. Was he having fun making him suffer?
“I mean, I am curious, but not enough to risk having an awkward moment with a stranger.” Polnareff just nodded at that, not knowing what else to think. What was Kakyoin trying to do? It was obvious by now that he knew everything. “But then I thought of something.”
Polnareff looked at him blankly, too confused to even know how to react. “What?”
“You know, the person who sent it seems to know a lot about me, and I have a pretty good idea of who it might be... But I wanted to be sure of who it is.” He paused again, watching Polnareff intently. “And since said person has a habit of being too obvious, I figured he would give himself away immediately if I brought up the subject.” His friend seemed too bewildered to try to speak, so Kakyoin just said what he wanted to hear already. “Also, he happens to be the one person in particular who I'd like to go on a date with.”
Polnareff was in complete disbelief, but it was all too clear. “So you mean...?”
Kakyoin smirked again, the smug look Polnareff hated and loved so much. “I mean that the requirements to get a date with me must be something along the lines of having a ridiculously tall hairstyle, talking non-stop, being a moron...”
“Being really handsome?” Polnareff said, his happiness allowing him to go back to his usual self.
“...Having a pretty high self-esteem...” Kakyoin joked, and was startled when Polnareff caught him in an embrace. It was warm and cozy and Kakyoin felt like he could melt into it, but they were in the middle of the school corridor, and Kakyoin wasn't exactly the type to show affection easily, let alone in public. “Alright, I really appreciate it, but can you not do this in the middle of the school?”
Polnareff let go of him, the dumbest smile on his face as he looked at Kakyoin again. “Sorry, I got too excited.” He could see that the expression on Kakyoin's face was of genuine happiness, something that he never got tired to see. “So... can I wait for you at five?”
Kakyoin nodded. “You better.”
Their date had gone well. In general, it hadn't been too different from when they usually hung out with Jotaro, but the fact that it was just the two of them and that they could call it a date surely made it special. They also had made some progress. Kakyoin had let Polnareff walk him home holding hands and surprised him with a kiss before walking inside, leaving a dumbstruck Polnareff standing in front of his house for a minute or two.
The next morning, Kakyoin woke up to find a text written good morning chéri and a ton of heart emojis, to which he replied with Please control your sappiness. But even if it was a little too cute for his taste, it was nice waking up to that, to assure himself that yesterday had been real.
After two days in nervous mode, Polnareff was finally back to normal, and happier than usual. He had an habit of showing affection and forgetting they were in public though, much to Kakyoin's embarrassment. At first Jotaro was confused, not used to seeing them being affectionate with each other, so Polnareff told him the whole story briefly. He wasn't that surprised, being used to watch them argue like a married couple almost everyday.
“So, are you guys a thing now?” Jotaro asked when the three of them were eating together at break.
Polnareff turned to look at Kakyoin, hopeful. “Are we? I-I mean, do you want to?”
Kakyoin snorted. “I don't know why I was hoping you'd ask me properly after all the drama with the card.”
“Jeez, you don't waste a chance to complain about me,” Polnareff said, crossing his arms.
“Sorry, but I think that using Jotaro's question as a cue to ask me to be your boyfriend is not the most romantic thing in the world.”
“As if you're very romantic. I sent you a cute text this morning and you didn't like it.”
“I didn't say I didn't like it. I just thought you exaggerated.”
“Oh, so you did like it?” Polnareff smirked. Kakyoin blushed in embarrassment.
“Not quite...” But Polnareff kept staring at him, waiting for him to admit it. “Alright, maybe.”
Polnareff put his arm around him and pulled him into a side embrace. “Aw, you see this, Jotaro? Our Kakyoin is a tsudare.”
It took Kakyoin a moment to understand. “Tsundere, you big idiot.”
“So you admit it?”
“What? No–”
“I think he got you this time,” Jotaro chuckled, rejoining the conversation.
“I used my own mistake to get back you. Aren't you proud of my smart move?” Polnareff said, giving Kakyoin a smug look.
Kakyoin rolled his eyes despite his smile. “Really impressive. I think you're making some progress.”
“I'm learning from you,” and he finished with a wink.
Kakyoin shook his head. “Don't compliment me after I just said shit about you, it makes me feel bad.”
“Oh, don't worry. I know you don't mean it,” Polnareff said, kissing his cheek and making Kakyoin blush even harder than before. “I know that if you didn't like me you wouldn't allow me to stay within 20 meter radius from you.”
Jotaro couldn't believe how silly it was the way that his two friends showed their care for each other. “That's some deep stuff, I'm going to cry,” he said, and his usually serious voice made the irony even louder. Polnareff laughed while Kakyoin, still embarrassed, let out a small chuckle.
After class was over, they all talked for a while once more, before saying their goodbyes – to Jotaro, that is, because Polnareff insisted on walking Kakyoin home.
“Your house is the opposite way,” Kakyoin said.
“I don't mind walking more if I have a chance of getting another kiss in the end,” Polnareff said happily, so Kakyoin just agreed after a sigh and, to Polnareff's surprise, took him by the hand.
They walked mostly in silence. It was nice talking to each other, but it was also very good to simply enjoy the presence of one another without a worry. To know that even if they hadn't said anything about being in a relationship yet, they meant a lot to each other.
But of course, they both wanted a relationship, and they wanted it to be said aloud. So when they reached Kakyoin's house, Kakyoin stood silent for a moment, choosing his words, before speaking up.
“Polnareff.”
“Hm?”
“A-Are we...” He paused, a little nervous. “Are we... boyfriends?”
Polnareff couldn't help but blush at hearing him say it. “Yes? I-If you want to...”
“I do,” Kakyoin said, with the smile that always made Polnareff's heart warm up. He responded with a smile of his own.
Surprising Polnareff once again, Kakyoin threw himself in his arms. Polnareff was confused at first, but soon hugged him back.
“You better be ready to put up with me,” Kakyoin said after a while.
Now Polnareff was even more confused. “What are you talking about? Isn't it the other way around?”
Kakyoin chuckled, his face buried in Polnareff's shoulder. “You haven't seen my stupid insecure side yet.”
Polnareff contemplated this. When Kakyoin was talking about how people don't care to know the real him, he could see a hint of sadness in his eyes. And he had said before that Polnareff and Jotaro were his first and only friends. It seemed that connecting to people had never been easy for him, so Polnareff could see why he would feel insecure.
“Well, no matter which side of you I'll see, I'll still like you. And I'll do my best to show you how important you are to me,” Polnareff said firmly as he tightened his embrace.
Those words reached Kakyoin's heart like a soothing melody. He nodded. “I trust you. And I'll try to show you how much I care about you more often, too.”
Polnareff felt like he never wanted to let him go, like he needed to protect him forever, even if Kakyoin usually seemed much stronger than him. Suddenly, his cold exterior and straightforwardness seemed like an attempt to hide this side of him. Just because he didn't let it show it didn't mean he didn't have problems. He wasn't an open book like Polnareff, and Polnareff never thought he would be seeing him so vulnerable. He really did trust him.
They finally broke the hug and stared at each other. Kakyoin couldn't recall the last time he had felt so safe, and Polnareff didn't think he had ever felt so determined to make someone happy. Kakyoin gave him a goodbye kiss and went inside, waving at him before closing the door.
On the next morning, Polnareff's phone buzzed with a text notification when he was about to get up.
Morning idiot <3
Polnareff laughed. The side of Kakyoin he was used to was back. Is that heart on the end your attempt to be romantic? he texted back.
I actually wanted to be cute, but not too cute, so I thought I'd throw an "idiot" in the middle
Really? Because it looks more like you were trying to call me an idiot and soften it with the heart
I'm still learning
I don't know why I thought you'd stop calling me an idiot if we started dating
That will only happen when you stop being one
I think dating you won't help me with that, I get all dumb around you
I'm not sure if I should feel flattered or concerned
Polnareff snickered at that and put his phone aside for a minute to stare at the ceiling in contemplation. So things would be like this now. They still had the same playful atmosphere going on, but with a new depth to their relationship. Things were as perfect as they could be. And to think Polnareff almost had given up when he was about to put that card inside Kakyoin's locker. Everything he would be losing right now, the whole path ahead forever undiscovered...
But he didn't have to think about that now, because he would be walking this path, along with Kakyoin.
And he couldn't wait.