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“I didn’t think it would snow this late in the year,” Jimin stepped foreword and let soft snowflakes fall on his person. He held out his hand, watched the snow dissolve on to his palm once they made contact with his skin.”It will probably be gone by morning.”
As soon as the words left his mouth, Jimin felt a sudden burst of chill attack his shoulder. The snow covered his black suit jacket as he spun around just in time to see Namjoon hide his laugh behind his hands, only the dimple peeked out from behind them. Jimin smirked at the other as he bent down to collect snow.
“Oh! I see how it is!”
"No! No no!" Namjoon’s eyes widened as he tried to step away from Jimin, laughter still at his lips, but Jimin tossed the snow into the air. They both burst into giggles as the snow washed over them, the smallest of flakes created a halo over Namjoon’s purple hair. The warmth that Jimin felt in his chest as he watched Namjoon ruffle the snow out of his hair could have melted all the snow that surrounded them. That small glee in Namjoon’s eyes was exactly what he wanted when he pulled him out of the nursing home. A small distraction after acknowledging his break up.
Namjoon smiled at him, the soft one that made Jimin turn red when he was ten, the smile that he met when he first walked through the nursing home for his volunteer work, the smile that made Jimin want more than friendship with this boy. Jimin smiled back before he let himself fall to the ground. He laid back and moved his hands up and down through the snow and his legs side to side.
“What are you doing?”
“Joonie, Haven’t you seen a snow angel before?” Jimin answered with a cheeky grin while Namjoon peered over him with a pout. He moved to lay next to him and proceeded to make his own snow angel.
“Bet mine will look better than yours.”
“You are on!”
Once they laughed with cold cheeks and beginning to feel the chill bleed into their suits, the pair sat up. Jimin couldn’t help but cackle at Namjoon’s hair sticking up everywhere, he reached over and brushed it down. “Your hair is everywhere.” He couldn’t help the fondest in his voice.
Namjoon’s cheeks tinged pink but Jimin couldn’t tell if that was because of the cold or because of him. “Don’t laugh at me.” Jimin rolled his eyes as he moved to stand up, offered Namjoon his hand to help him up. That boy was clumsy on dry land, he didn’t want to try with snow. Namjoon accepted Jimin’s hand. As if the universe was mocking Jimin for his thoughts, Namjoon lost balance when they both stood. The shorter grabbed his hips to steady him while the taller gripped Jimin’s arms in surprise, bodies pressed against each other. The two stared at each other. A ghost of a breath apart.
Namjoon looked down at Jimin’s lips. Jimin did the same to Namjoon. They both then looked back to each other’s eyes. Jimin held his breath, afraid that even a sigh could break this fragile moment, they both leaned in. Jimin waited. Namjoon leaned foreword and pressed his lips against the other’s.
Jimin sighed into the kiss. He pressed back softly. His hand squeezed Namjoon’s hip and he used his free hand to cup the back of Namjoon’s head and pulled him closed.
They pulled apart for a breath but as Jimin tried to pull Namjoon into another kiss, Namjoon pulled back completely. His breath hitched and Jimin wished that he could erase that look of heartbreak on his friend’s face. Even when he could feel his own breaking, he wanted to make sure Namjoon was okay. He gave him a weak smile. “It’s Kookie...isn’t it?”
“I...I’m so sorry.”
“Joonie, it’s okay.”
“No. It isn’t. I-I shouldn’t have done that.”
“Hey. Hey. It’s okay,” Jimin took Namjoon’s hands into his own, squeezed them tight. “I promise...It’s okay. I missed my chance once. I missed it now….Maybe one day…. I won’t miss it but right now, at this moment, this chance belongs to Kookie and I promise that it is okay,” Jimin chuckled as he noticed that his friend’s eyes started to water. “ We will always be friends, Joonie. It is okay. Go get him”
“What if...What if he doesn’t want me back? What if I messed all of this up?” Namjoon’s voice was soft and broken. Jimin a rush of sadness wash over him. He knew that Namjoon had nothing to worry about. He didn’t realize how Jungkook looked at him at the treehouse, like Namjoon was the cutest thing in this world. It was as if Kim Namjoon had hung the moon and the stars himself and Jeon Jungkook was there to witness it all. Jimin bet on the snowfall around them that Jungkook was probably going to beg Namjoon to take him back any second now. Namjoon didn’t have a reason to worry.
“You still have to try. He’d be an idiot to let you go. Trust me.”
“I’m sorry.”
“Joonie. Go...I’ll be okay,” Jimin let Namjoon’s hands slip out of his hold before he was pulled into a hug. Jimin resisted the urge to melt into Namjoon’s form and instead held him tight for a moment then pulled back all at once. If he kept Namjoon too close then he might hear his heart shatter. Who knew that he could feel this way because of a letter that he accidentally ended it up with? Namjoon had even mentioned to him that those letters weren't even supposed to be sent out. Jimin couldn't hate Namjoon for it. Hell, he couldn't even hate Taehyung for it either. His bestfriend meant well and probably thought that Jimin and Namjoon would have been perfect for each other once upon a time but Jungkook got his own letter first. That made all of the difference. Maybe it was the idea of the potential of being with Namjoon that Jimin ended up stuck with. He always had these small what ifs' when he thought about the fifth grade. What if he was able to ask Namjoon out like he planned? What if he got his letter just a little bit sooner? What if Najoon chose him instead? But it didn't matter anymore. Namjoon had made his choice and Jimin wasn't going to hold him back from it. Jungkook better not fuck this up.
“Thank you, Jiminie.” Namjoon whispered as he stepped back, slow in his movements before he went back inside the nursing home. Jimin watched him go until the doors closed. He pushed his hands into his pockets, tried not to reach out for him, to chase after him, to beg him to choose him instead. He looked down at the snow angels they left on the ground. He kicked his angel lightly.
“Dammit.”
Xxxx
Namjoon leaned back against the doors. Why did he do that? His eyes still felt too wet as he processed everything that happened in the last ten minutes. He replayed Jimin’s blue hair ruffled from their snow angles. Jimin’s soft smirk when he threw the snow in the air. Jimin trying to make him laugh. Jimin kissing him. He kissed Jimin. It was nice. It was warm and sweet. For a small moment, Namjoon really enjoyed it. It was everything that he could have wanted. But it wasn’t Kookie.
In theory, Jimin was everything he ever wanted in a boyfriend. Jimin was smart, funny, handsome, and sweet. He knew that in the sixth grade that he was a little in love with Jimin. That was before Jin left for college though. Before Tae mailed out his letters. Before Jeon Jungkook became apart of his life. Jungkook was the boy he wished he was kissing instead of Jimin.
Why did Namjoon have to hurt his friend for him to figure that out?
“It is okay, Joonie ”
It wasn’t though. He knew that it wasn’t. He saw the hurt in Park Jimin’s eyes and he wished with everything in his heart that it wasn’t because of him.
Namjoon stood there for a moment before he straightened up and dusted his jacket. He owed it to Jimin to at least try. He owed it to himself. Namjoon made his way through the halls of the nursing home, the old folks still dance and laughed to the music in the main room. Namjoon couldn’t help but smile. It motivated him in a way as if the universe was saying that everything would work out one way or another. Although he hoped that the universe would pick that he and Kookie could be together. He got to the front door of the nursing home but he hesitated. Before the what ifs’ could attack him, Namjoon thought of Jungkook stealing his ice cream on their first date. The thought of how Jungkook always offered to walk him to his music class. He thought of how Jungkook would always kiss his cheek when Namjoon held his hand.
“I can do this…” Namjoon mumbled. He pushed the door open only to see Jeon Jungkook standing at the bottom of the doorsteps in his hoodie, jeans, and those dumb timberlands. His hands in his hoodie pockets as he gave a ghost of a smile to Namjoon when his eyes widened, mouth closed and opened as he tried to grab at the words that kept escaping him.
“Hey Hyung.”
“W-What are you doing here?”
“You said that you didn’t like driving in the snow...and you really suck at driving. Did want you to kill yourself for trying.”
“You brat,” Namjoon scoffed lightly as he gave a wet laugh. Jungkook climbed up the steps, slow and easy, as if afraid that Namjoon would run off.
“I’m your brat though,” He smiled as he hit the last step. He stood tall in front of Namjoon. “Break my heart, hyung. Break it into a million pieces. I can take it. As long as it is you. I can take it.” Namjoon’s breath hitched as Jungkook cupped his face. “Waste it on me. I’ll take it all.”
Namjoon stared at him for a moment. He moved his hand to the back of Jungkookie’s neck and pulled him into a kiss. Both felt relief wash over them. Jungkooke wrapped his arms around Namjoon’s hips and pulled him close. Namjoon used his free hand to cup Jungkook’s face as they pulled apart.
“I love you, Jeon Jungkook.”
“If it wasn’t clear enough. I love you too, Hyung.” The pair laughed as they both kissed again. And again. And again. Then one last time before Jungkook pulled away with the biggest smile on his face while Namjoon's cheeks burned red with his own bright smile.
"Can we go now? I'm cold."
"Big baby..."
"But I am your baby, right hyung?"
"You get a few brownie points for that romantic speech."
"Fuck yeah!" Jungkook cheered as he took Namjoon's hand in his, cold fingers intertwined with each other, as he pulled him down the steps and towards the car. Namjoon laughed as he jogged a bit to match his pace.
"Where are we going?"
"I'm taking you out. We had a lot of dates to catch up on," Jungkook said once they got to the car, he opened the passenger side and help Namjoon inside before kissing him on the lips. It was slow and soft and everything Namjoon wanted in this moment. Jungkook pulled away only to kiss his nose, his cheek and then one last peck on the lips before he closed the door and moved to the driver's side. He made sure he held Namjoon's hand after he turned the car on. He brought their hands to his lips and kissed the back of Namjoon's hand which caused the other to give a shy smile as felt a little flustered with all the attention. Jungkook looked at him with all the love a person could hold in his eyes and whispered. "I love you, Namjoon."
"Love you too."
Jungkook gave one last kiss to his hand before he pulled out of parking. "Let's go before your curfew. The last thing we need is for your dad to get mad at me for bringing you home late."