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My life has always looked great to everyone around me. I live in luxury, my powerful family could get anything for me. But I know I was craving for something more, love. I don't say that my family doesn't love me but they are... showing it in a particular way, I suppose. That's how things are in my family. We don't say I Love you or any gentle words, we don't give each other hugs and we don't even laugh with each other often. We are mostly just here living in the same mansion. And people are scared to approach me because of my family's reputation around here. There are still that mafia movies hardcore fans to ask me how my life as Mafiosi son is. 'It's for my movie!' some said. Like you could do something watchable just by taking notes about me. I would never say that to them, of course.
I don't want to shatter their dreams by telling them the "Mafiosi life" is nothing like their movies either.
Enough thoughts, it's time to go for a new school day. I'm going out of the house to the family chauffeur waiting for me. That's one good thing about my life- it would be too tiresome to walk to school every day. I climb in the car and the chauffeur starts to drive after that.
I'm now in school, walking to my locker under several students' gazes, like usual. It's not like it upsets me anymore. As I typed my locker password on the touchscreen, I heard a voice beside me.
- Hey Reese! What's up?
I turn around to see Esteban, the only person who doesn't look at me like a supernatural thing and I think it's my only friend. I don't know if he sees me as a friend, though. But he is somehow like me with people troubled by him because of his frightening adoptive mother and his bionic eye, hidden behind brown locks, attracting weird looks. I must say that being with me protected him because no one approached him anymore despite his tiny and shy appearance.
- Hey. Nothing new. Things are still as boring as ever. And you?
He sighs.
- My first class is a math test. I worked on it for the whole weekend but I don't understand anything.
- I can help you with that you know. My grades are pretty good.
- I know. But I don't want to take your time for that.
- Don't worry about "wasting my time", helping you will never be a waste of time.
Esteban gives a small laugh.
- Then I'll take your help next time. I still get the average but you know... I only want her to be proud of me.
No doubt that the "her" was referring to his mother. I know he was putting a lot of pressure over himself because adopted kids were supposed to prove their worth or something according to some. Like they need to prove they deserved to be adopted. Stupid, if you ask me. Like adopted children don't have it hard enough.
- Are you okay? Esteban's voice asks. Sorry I was rambling about my life again. Your turn, I spoke enough.
- Don't ever feel bad about that. I'm more than willing to listen.
I stay silent for a few seconds. I laugh.
- But yeah, I have a biology test to worry about myself. No, I'm not stressed about it at all but-
I interrupted myself. I may upset him at this point.
- Hm? He looks at him, waiting for me to continue.
- Nevermind.
- By the way, you have Mister Callister in biology, right?
- Yeah, why?
- What do you think about him? Heard a lot of people here saying he was... creepy.
- Creepy sounds about right.
- Huh? You think so?
- Just a gut feeling, don't mind it too much. And you?
- I don't like him but I don't hate him either. He always gives me good grades so I can't hate him too much. He laughs once again.
I see someone coming by our lockers. It's Gwendolyn, mostly called Gwen, one of Esteban classmates and friends. She is pretty popular here. She has everything for that: always well dressed and pretty, blond hair and blue eyes. But she was as cold as ice to push away unwanted people, it seems. Esteban still got to be her friends and she seems to like him a lot.
- Hi, guys speaking about Mister Callister huh? She asks
Did she overhear our conversation? Don't like that
- Just heard you speaking about something 'creepy' so it must be about Creepy Man.
- Creepy Man? Esteban is again surprised by the nickname.
Gwendolyn didn't reply and closed her locker. Then she looked at him and says
- You should do less daydreaming and more observing during the Creepy Man class. It's biology.
Where is she going with that?
Gwen sure loved to drop implicit sentences like that but not half of her friends get them. That's probably why some think she is weird. I learned to understand her but I must say I didn't get this one.
Esteban stayed silent about Gwen's remark. I was about to say something but the bell rang. Time to class.
- See you later! Esteban said to me when he left with his friend. And I went to my class after that.
It's now at 4 pm. The day is over. As I was walking out of school, I saw Esteban waiting for me. Today, the chauffeur couldn't pick me up since he needed to go to my father but that's okay, walking with Esteban always feels great.
Today the air was strangely clean to let us being outside without a mask. The world has gone so wild- air pollution, global warming going hellish- that we should consider this a precious thing.
We were talking while going through the high buildings and skyscrapers. We almost don't see any small buildings anymore. Esteban and I are one of the few who still live in a house. There are barely any less than ten-story buildings anymore. And almost everyone is living in one of those gigantic buildings we see everywhere.
- So how went your test? I asked as we were walking.
- Less bad than I expected! I wrote good things for once. And yours?
- Good.
- I knew it.
He laughs but it sounded nervous this time.
- Everything is fine? I asked
- O-Of course!
- Are you sure? Did something happen?
Esteban didn't say anything for a moment.
- I keep thinking about what Gwen said. Am I still too naive? He looked at me, waiting for my answer.
- I don't think you are naive. But it's not only about being naive or not. We should not forget that some among us can be a danger for others and you and me.
I thought for a second about what to say next. He would be better as not as watchful as me, paranoid even.
- Don't become like me though. Seeing everyone and everything as bad isn't a good life to lead.
- Thank you. You always know what to say.
He gave me a small smile. That softens me for a second and I smiled back. We were now back at casual conversations. I listened to Esteban talking about his mother. I loved to see the joy in his dark eyes whenever he speaks about the time he spends with her.
We were at the crossroad where we usually split.
- See you tomorrow! Esteban said joyfully
- See you.
And we walked in the direction of our respective houses. I was now walking alone. As I walked my underlying loneliness started to come back. I always feel empty but I can at least forget about it when Esteban-my only friend-is with me. One thinks I don't feel anything at all. That's why they avoid me. I don't know what to do about it anymore except trying to forget to feel. But I can't stop all those devouring feelings from coming.
One could think my life is all mapped out. But given what I saw and still see about the Mafiosi life with my family, I don't want to become the family mob boss after my father's death at all. But I can't think about doing anything else. No one would allow me that.
I liked to walk because it helps me to think but bad thoughts were always coming with that. I decide to stop by the clockmaker's shop. I find it peaceful to watch him working on his creations. I'd love to buy one of his watches but-without surprise- high prices come with his hard work.
I entered the shop and the clockmaker came out of the backroom.
- Hello! You didn't come here for quite some time, right? How are things going?
- Hello. As usual, I suppose.
- I see. I let you look around as you may like. If you want something, I'm right here.
- Thank you.
The shop was ancient with its wooden floor, the old tapestry on the walls and the ancient-like clock. In the year 2065, it looks out of place to see a decoration like this but this is what I love about it. Between buildings full of screens airing ads or breaking news.
I closed my eyes and listened to clocks and watches ticking. Then I looked at the clocks and watches locked in the cabinets against the shop's walls. I was feeling peaceful until I heard the shop's door opening. I opened the eyes and turned around to see a man entering. He was tall and well-built. His hair was blond like mine but longer and tied together in a ponytail. Hie also had blue eyes like me. I find myself staring at him because it was strange to see more than one person in this shop.
He looked at me, muttered something like a "Hello" and went to the counter.
- Welcome, Tobias! Nice to see you here! How is everything going?
- We don't have anything to do at work as usual. But I went to see that new exhibition about the 1990s French vehicles last Sunday. It was great.
- Ah! Yes! I heard about this one. And... are things working out with that "Camille"?
Here we go with love talks. That clockmaker loves that kind of gossips. I don't care enough about that to eavesdrop.
The guy stayed silent for a moment. But I can see him blushing a bit. Pretty sure he doesn't want to share his private life with me here though.
- Hm is it that bad?
Just drop the thing, we don't care.
- Not at all. We talked a lot lately.
- Don't worry, you'll get to that Camille girl. You're a great guy.
- Girl?
Hm? Is Camille a man? I can understand the confusion though. Not everyone knows that Camille can also be a man's name.
I looked up at that. Here I am. Eavesdropping about some random man's love life.
"Tobias" opened his mouth to say something but closed it immediately.
"I guess..." was his only reply after that.
- Sorry I pushed you around enough for today. I have to take care of my darlings over there. See you later!
The blond-haired man looked suddenly tired. He seemed to play with something plushy in his hand. He turned around to the shop exit.
He muttered something at me again and then left the shop. I felt envious of this guy. It must feel great to feel actual romantic love.
I looked at the time on my cellphone. It was time for me to go.
I was now back into the real world once I was out of the shop. Our dear good world. I laughed by myself and walked back to my house, to the life I'm supposed to lead.