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“Is that the wedding invitation?!” Maya shouted excitedly, springing from the couch.
Phoenix nodded triumphantly. “Yup. The concept design at least. I still need to go over it with Miles and get the ‘Edgeworth Seal of Approval’ on it”
Phoenix has asked Maya to be his “best man” (best woman?) and the two were at Phoenix’s and Miles’ shared home going over wedding ideas.
Maya grabbed the piece of paper from him and scanned it. “Wow Nick, I think your handwriting got worse over the years!”
“Well, Miles’ handwriting will be used on the final draft anyway; This is just a placeholder.”
She giggled and continued to look over the invitation. “ 'You are hereby cordially invited’” she read in an exaggerated pompous voice. “‘to attend the ceremonious union of Miles A. Edgeworth and… Phoenix R. Wright?’”
Phoenix seemed to have misinterpreted her confusion. “He also chose the pretentious wording. I don’t get why he’s being so formal about it. It’s just going to be close friends and-”
“You have a middle name?”
Silence fell between the two.
“... Maya… I’ve told you my middle name before.”
A heavier silence followed.
“Oh right! Hahaha… what was it again?”
“... Maybe I should have asked Larry to be my best man instead.”
“Hey! You really think Larry Butz would be able to remember it?”
He had to pause at that because honestly, she was right. “But still!”
“Like you remember my middle name!” Maya countered.
“Because you don’t have one.”
“And if I did, would you remember?”
“Maya, if we learned anything from the game I played with Miles for the last few years, it’s that I take my friends’ full names seriously.”
Her face brightened up at that. “Hey, how about I guess it? Like you did with Edgeworth!”
Phoenix couldn’t help but scuff a little. “I can guarantee you that you wouldn’t be able to guess my middle name, especially since you can’t remember it the first time.”
Maya puffed her cheeks at that. “Wanna bet?”
“Not really, but I’m sensing that you’ve been craving a boon for a while now.”
She smiled mischievously. “You guys are planning on having a buffet for the reception, right?”
Phoenix felt his blood turn cold. “I have a bad feeling about this.”
“If I can correctly guess what your middle name is, you have to have burgers as one of the dishes.”
The two friends stared at each other.
“No. Absolutely not.”
“C’mon! You don’t even know what I’m offering if I lose.”
“There is nothing on this planet that you can offer me that will make me willing to risk having hamburgers served at mine and Miles’ wedding.”
“I will not talk about the Steel Samurai franchise in front of you from now until after the wedding! Reception and all.”
Phoenix took a pause and processed the information. “Not a word at all?”
Maya nodded. “No mention of the Steel Samurai, Pink Princess, Nickel Samurai, or anything. I won’t even talk about the Plumed Punisher.”
Neither spoke for a full minute.
Phoenix finally spoke up. “You have one full hour to figure it out. I’ll even be nice and let you use Google if you get stuck.”
He stuck out his hand.
Maya smirked and eagerly grabbed it. “Agreed. Can’t wait to have fine gourmet burgers at the dinner.”
“You’ll have to guess correctly first,” Phoenix smirked back as he pulled out his phone to set the timer. “And one hour starts… now.”
“Robert.”
“No.”
“Rupert.”
“Nope.”
“Ryan.”
“Incorrect.”
“Rrr… Roger!”
“Nope.”
“Rrrr…. Rrrr…” Maya trailed off. “One sec.” She said while pulling out her phone.
Phoenix shrugged as he settled on the couch. “Go right ahead, Miss Fey. We might as well get comfortable, cause you’re gonna be at it for a while.”
“Shut up! It’s hard thinking of names on that spot! I’ll get to it sooner or later.”
After twenty minutes, later started sounding like the more likely possibility.
“Is it Rudolph?”
“Thank god it isn’t. The last thing I need is you making Christmas jokes around me.”
Maya groaned and glared at the baby name site. How is it possible to have so many names that start with “r?!”
Then a thought suddenly struck her. “Nick! You studied Shakespeare in college, right?”
“You remember my dropped major but not my middle name?”
“Is it because your middle name is Romeo?!” Maya looked toward him triumphantly.
Phoenix gave her a side-eyed look. “Even if it was, that wouldn’t have factored into my choice of study or career.”
“Try telling that to Apollo! I’m pretty sure the main reason he became a lawyer was because of his last name!”
Another twenty minutes rolls around and Maya is at wit’s end!
“Please tell me it’s Raditz!”
Phoenix’s face twisted in confusion. “Wasn’t that a Dragon Ball Z character? Why would I be named after that”
Maya threw her arms in the air. “I don’t know! Why not? Your first name is a fictional bird and your fiance has a fictional character’s name!”
Their discussion was then interrupted by the front door opening and cheerful voice. “I’m home!”
Phoenix brightly smiled as he turned to the voice. “Hi, Trucy. Was school good today?”
“Hey!” Maya barked gently smacking him in the arm. “Don’t try and eat up time talking to…” Her face then brightened and she ran straight to Trucy, “Trucy! Help me out! What’s Nick’s middle name?!”
“Uh, who said you can use my daughter to cheat?!”
“Nothing in the rules specified that I couldn’t use outside help, so it’s fair game.” Maya turned giving Phoenix a smug look.
He was about to refute but thought about it. Damn, she’s right! Who’d of thought Maya would actually learn something hanging out with lawyers all the time?!
“Wait, ‘middle name?’” Trucy interrupted. “Daddy! I thought we were over this!”
“Well, Maya brought it back. And now our reception’s menu depends on it, so proceed with caution.”
Her eyes shifted. “Burgers?”
“Yup.”
“So what do you say Trucy?” Maya tempted. “Hot, yummy, delicious, juicy burgers. Think about it! Your papa will probably want to have something weird, like foie gras or something. I mean, what even is that!”
“It’s a duck or goose liver, Maya.”
“See? Weird!”
Trucy put her finger on her chin in thought. “As funny it would be seeing Papa’s reaction...I can’t help you.”
“What?!”
“Ha!”
“Mostly because I kinda forgot what Daddy’s middle name is.” Trucy shrugged.
“Wha-? My own daughter!” Phoenix exclaimed while Maya groaned.
“Sorry, Daddy. Good luck though Auntie Maya!” And Trucy left for her room.
Phoenix let loose a sad sigh and turned toward his friend. “By the way, we will definitely not be serving foie gras at our wedding. How they make it is super messed up.”
Fifteen minutes later, Maya is lying facedown on the couch, accepting her upcoming defeat.
“I officially hate the letter ‘r’ now!” She moaned into a pillow.
Phoenix replied with a content sigh and a happy grin. “I’m looking forward to the peace I’ll be getting from you.”
That’s what she gets for daring to gamble with the Steel Samurai, Maya supposed to herself. She can always talk about the special edition blu-ray release with Miles after the honeymoon.
The front door then opened again, this time with a more subdued “I’m home.”
Speak of the devil. Maya glumly thought.
“Hey Miles,” Phoenix replied with a dopey, lovestruck smile.
Miles observed the scene in the living room with slight confusion.
“Really Miss Fey, I know wedding planning isn’t all fun and games, but we’re still in the early stages. You can’t be worn out already.”
“Aww, she’s just cranky ‘cause she’s about to lose our wager in…” Phoenix checked his timer. “Less than two minutes.”
“What on earth could you possibly be wagering on?”
“Nick’s middle name.” Maya sat up from the couch and explained. “I was trying to guess it like he did for you, but it’s literally impossible! I can’t believe you guys did this for almost a decade!”
“Oh.” Miles casually replied. “It’s Ryuuichi.”
Phoenix choked on air. “Miles! What have you done?!”
“You had a Japanese middle name?!” Maya yelled accusatorily. “No wonder I couldn’t figure it out?!”
“The fact that you forgot my middle name was Japanese in the first place says a lot about-”
Just then, the alarm bell went off and Phoenix’s face turned white.
Maya’s face, on the other hand, brightened so much it could rival the sun.
“YESSS!” She cheered out. “We’re having burgers for the wedding!”
Phoenix groaned and buried his face in his hand, while his fiance blinked several times.
“I beg your pardon? Wright, what is she talking about?”
Uh-oh. Lasting naming. Not good.
Miles sighed as he settled into bed with Phoenix. “I can’t believe hamburgers are going to be on the menu for our wedding.”
Phoenix groaned in response. “It was supposed to be an easy win. But you just had to ruin it by telling Maya before time was up.”
“How the hell was I supposed to know what the stakes were?”
They were silent for a bit when Phoenix realized something. “By the way, how did you know my middle name. I can’t think of a time I've actually told you; I was so concentrated on finding yours that it pretty much slipped my mind.”
Miles gave a sly smile. “Technically, you didn’t. It was your mother.”
“Huh?”
“One time when I was over your house when we were children, you and Larry accidentally knocked over some of her crystal and she yelled out your full name.”
Phoenix cringed at the old memory but then smiled. “I can’t believe you remembered after all these years. It seems like my name slipped everyone on the planet’s mind.”
Miles shrugged in reply. “I suppose I’m just able to remember the important things, unlike everyone else.
“Why Mr. Edgeworth, are you getting sentimental on me?”
“Oh shut up and go to sleep.”
The two were starting to drift off when Phoenix abruptly sat up squawking an “Oh my God!”
Miles followed suit, concerned. “Phoenix, what’s wrong?”
“We’re having burgers. At a wedding. That Franziska will be attending.”
The quiet room became deafening as the horror set in.
“Phoenix Ryuuichi Wright, what have you done?!”