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Eddie Diaz doesn’t know why he came to the reunion. While high school wasn’t too bad for him, it wasn’t the best, either. He hasn’t kept in touch with anyone, other than a few random Instagram posts he sees once in a while. He usually isn’t up at 2 am, reminiscing about his high school years.
Yet, he’s still at the reunion. He keeps telling himself that it’ll be good to get out of the house, even if it’s just for some bad, but definitely free booze. He hasn’t had a good time for a couple of months, so he’ll take all the alcohol he can get. (Within safe limits, of course.)
“Teddy!” he hears a woman’s voice. At first, he thinks she’s saying it to someone else, but then she gets close and says, “Hey, Teddy, it’s Julie.”
He blinks at her, slowly lowering the beer he’s been sipping. “It’s Eddie, actually.”
She’s unfazed by it. She puts her brunette locks behind her shoulder, then pulls down on her top so her boobs are more visible. Eddie can barely stop himself from rolling his eyes.
“Oh my god, I’ve been literally thinking about you this week. How are you?” The woman - Julie, apparently - is blinking at him with big eyes. “Haven’t seen you in forever!”
“Uh, oh… Good, thanks. Yourself?”
“I’ve been literally saying this to Lydia the other day: I wonder what Teddy is up to these days.”
He chuckles dryly. “It’s still Eddie.”
She opens her mouth to say something, but she’s interrupted by someone. “Hey, man, there you are!”
They both look towards the new voice. It belongs to a guy Eddie vaguely recognises but can’t really place. It has been a while and he did his best to forget all the people he went to high school with.
“I’m talking to Teddy, Buck, so just move along.”
“It’s Eddie,” he says again.
“Whatever,” she scoffs and walks away.
Eddie and stranger, Buck, share a look, then start laughing. “Thanks for that, man.”
“Oh, any time, Teddy,” he says with a wink.
Eddie… blushes. He’s a 28-year-old man and he blushes when a guy winks at him. Fuck. But also, it brings up memories he kind of forgot about and feelings he… hid.
Buck lingers around him and Eddie doesn’t send him away. They’re drinking their beers quietly while crowd watching, although Eddie is thinking about high school, trying to figure out who this guy is.
He definitely seems familiar. This isn’t just a random dude that walked into a 10-year high school reunion, but Eddie can’t place his face. His name also sounds familiar, he’s definitely heard it before.
So he watches his face, unashamedly, trying to figure it out. His blonde hair, his piercing blue eyes, his features. Eddie knows that he’s met this guy before. He knows that his brain remembers him, but there’s a certain kind of tingling in his heart. It pulls on his heartstrings, the same way it did, back in school, when he...
“You’re Evan Buckley!” he says (borderline yells) when the revelation hits him.
Buck blinks at him. “Yeah.”
The guy who arrived a few months after Eddie did was skinny, nerdy and only the girls favourite because he was new. But the guy in front of him is ripped and has a charming smile. Unfortunately for Eddie.
“I remember you in English class, you know,” Eddie says with a knowing smirk.
“Oh, do you now?”
“Yeah, you always had an answer, not the right one, but it was an answer.”
Buck laughs and takes a sip from his beer. “Yeah, well, I’m sure Mrs Greene appreciated me saying that Gatsby was an asswipe.”
“You got detention for how long?”
“Four Saturdays, but man, it was worth it.”
“I bet it was.”
They’re silent after that. There weren’t friends in school, never even spoke to each other. But in reality, there’s so much more than that.
Adolescence was very confusing for Eddie. He saw people dating and hooking up, changing partners faster than others were changing their socks. He saw boys and girls making out and in all fairness, he wasn’t sure he wanted that. He saw girls he liked, had silly crushes on them, but he was a chicken and didn’t make a move.
Then Buck arrived at his school, and life got a hell of a lot more confusing. He didn’t understand why he was crushing on him instead of any of the girls. Their school had girls other guys his age would’ve died for. He didn’t understand what crushes were, either and how he was supposed to feel like. But when Buck looked at him, Eddie was blushing, when Buck smiled at him, he was blushing. When he bumped into him, Eddie had heart palpitations.
But then he graduated and realised that his head was just messing with him. It was his hormones making him think he actually had a crush on Buck. He liked girls and that’s the end of that. He still likes them, but there’s just something about Buck.
“I remember you, too,” Buck says, quieter this time. Eddie looks at him, but his eyes are fixed on the crowd. “You were always shy and quiet, but I remember you were…” he trails off, but his cheeks redden a bit.
Eddie debates whether he wants to know or not. He wants to know what his blushing means, but he doesn’t ask. Instead, he changes the topic entirely, “I’m sure you have other friends you want to catch up with, so I won’t keep you.”
Buck shakes his head. “No one bothered to keep in touch with me. I don’t even know why I came.”
“I only came for the free beer,” Eddie whispers, admitting his shameful truth.
“To be honest, same.” Buck laughs. “Want to get out of here and have a normal beer, not this watered-down shit?”
“You had me at ‘get out of here’.”
The thing is, they were never friends, only people who were locked together for a couple of hours for 5 days a week. But as they’re walking to a bar not too far from their old high school, Eddie thinks that he could deal with having a friend. Hell, he needs a friend and Buck’s as good as any.
Eddie sits at a table while Buck goes to grab some drinks. He uses that time to text his aunt, who’s watching Christopher, to let her know that he’s doing some catching up with a friend and will be home later than expected.
“Alright, there we go.” Buck hands him a bottle of Bud, then takes a large gulp from his own. “So, Eddie…”
“So, Buck.”
“We never had the chance to talk in school, did we?”
“I guess not.”
Now that they’re out of the horrifying, yet comfortable safety net of their old high school, Eddie realises he doesn’t actually know how to make friends with Buck. They have nothing in common, probably, other than two and a half years of school together and a stupid little crush Eddie had on him that didn’t even make sense. But here’s the thing: normally, Eddie’s fine in social situations. He knows how to make small talk with people, how to have a decent social life, but ever since the divorce, his confidence is at a ten-year low.
“What have you been up to? A decade’s a long time.”
“I… got married, had a son, trained as an Army medic, served two tours in Afghanistan, got divorced and I’m kind of in-between careers right now.”
Buck stares at him for a few seconds, then takes a long sip of his beer. “Wow,” is all he says.
“I… yeah.”
“And you sure you’re 28, right? Not 38?”
Eddie laughs. “Last time I checked, yeah.” He plays with the label of his bottle as he continues. “Tried the college thing, it wasn’t for me. I guess… I was lost and stupid and it was like 4 in the morning and I was like ‘let’s try the army thing!’”
Buck watches him for a second, then says, “This isn’t an interrogation, you know.”
“What do you mean?”
“You’re listing it, your life, like you’re just reading from a book.”
“Yeah, well… The divorce does that to you.”
“Shit, sorry.”
There it is, that pity again. People look at him, apologise to him when they find out he’s divorced. It’s not the end of the world, he knows, but when he met Shannon, when they got married, he was certain they would stay married.
“It is what it is.”
“Hey, if there’s one thing I know is that failed relationships suck. Been there, done that.” Buck scoffs. “Plenty of times.”
“Rough decade?”
“You could say that.” He pauses as they both watch a group of very drunk girls sing along to a song from one of their phones. A guy walks up to them, presumably a bartender, and gently asks them to leave. “Rough couple of years, actually.”
“Well, I’ve got… Half a bottle of beer and two working ears if you want to tell me.”
For a second, Buck looks like he’s considering it, but then down the rest of his beer and stands. “Round two?”
“Sure.”
As he walks away, Eddie’s determined to not check him out. He fails.
He doesn’t know why Buck makes his head spin, why he gives his heart that funny feeling. He’s not even sure if he should go exploring that. It’s a thing to do maybe, possibly, when he’s sober, not when he’s tipsy and isn’t thinking straight anymore.
“It’s going to be a lot,” Buck says, when he returns, putting the glasses on the table with a soft thud.
“What is?”
“You told me about your divorce, so I feel like I owe you one embarrassing secret in return.”
“Oh?” Eddie raises his eyebrow. “Do tell.”
Buck watches him for long seconds, silently chewing on his lips as he does, deep in thought. When he speaks, his voice is low. “I’m not really the relationship kind of guy. I mean, I am with the right person. But most likely they don’t work out. A couple of years back, I was in a relationship. Her name was Abby. She was funny, kind, and caring.” For some reason, it stabs Eddie in the stomach, hearing Buck talk about a girl he was in love with. Eddie drowns that feeling with some beer. “She was great. Her mom died and then she decided to go soul searching in Ireland with the promise of us getting back together when she comes back. I haven’t seen her in 5 years, haven’t spoken to her in 4.”
“Fuck, man, I’m sorry to hear that.”
“I think it’s for the best.” He gives him a half-assed smile. “So after that, I spiralled and kind of became addicted to… sex,” he mumbles the last word, not even looking at Eddie. “Even stole a firetruck.”
“You did not!”
“Honest to God!” Buck chuckles. “My captain can prove that. He had a very uh… insightful, yet awkward chat with me.”
“Wow, man. If you said this to me 13 years ago when you came to the school, I would’ve been like ‘Nah, man, that kid is cute!’.”
Eddie says that before his head can catch up. Once he realises it’s out there, he takes a big sip of his beer to hide his embarrassment. Fuck, he doesn’t want to go through that turmoil again, obsessing over (and probably crushing over) a kid who doesn’t even realise Eddie’s there. He doesn’t know why he’s having those feelings again or why he had them in the first place. He likes women. It's as simple as that. He loves everything about them. But there’s Buck. Buck messed up his head a decade ago and now that they’re being social, he’s messing it up again. The only difference is that back then, Eddie was certain that it was just puberty, but he’s no longer got that excuse.
Buck, thankfully, doesn’t say anything to that, but he’s got this small smile on his lips, almost naughty, almost knowing and it drives Eddie insane. It also doesn’t help that there’s tension, or so Eddie feels, after his remark.
“So, that is Buck 101, basically. Did a fair bit of bartending after school, tried joining the Navy, then I became a firefighter.”
“How’s that working out for you?”
“It’s awesome. I love it.” He thinks for a second, then says, “Hey, if you’re ever in need of a job, I’m sure we could find some room for you down at the station.”
“Don’t you need training for that?”
“Actually, I was thinking of scrubbing the toilet? Loading the dishwasher, even, that kind of thing.”
“You’re an idiot,” Eddie laughs, glad that tension is broken. “But it’s better than any of the jobs I find, so might take you up on your offer.”
Buck smiles at him, honest and sincere, and for a second, Eddie feels like he’s 15 again, he’s sitting in the cafeteria, and he’s seeing Buck for the first time. But then it switches, and he’s a 28-year-old veteran with a kid and a fallen apart marriage and he’s watching the man across him and his heart can’t stay silent.
So Eddie downs his beer, hoping to drown whatever is going on in his head and his heart and stands. “Next round is on me, then we’re playing darts and I’m wiping you off the face of the planet.
“You’re on.”
Three beers later, Buck gets some vodka shots. Eddie’s not embarrassed to say that it gives him a serious case of the giggles, but it also means he gets a bit… touchy.
“So I said to him,” pause for a hiccup, “I said to Christopher, Santa will not bring you the dinosaur toy if you don’t put your shoes away.” He leans on Buck, giggling. “He’s a good kid, but he’s constantly at war with his fucking shoes.”
Buck laughs. “When I was a kid, I used to hide my dad’s shoes all the time so you should be glad he’s not doing that to you.”
“Don’t give him any ideas.” Eddie aims the darts at the board; only two land on the floor so he considers that a success. He’s not even that drunk, he’s barely tipsy. He’s used to alcohol, but his concentration is gone. “Shit, that reminds me, I should go.”
“Oh.” Buck blinks, then nods. “I had a good evening.”
“Yeah, me too.” With a few taps, Eddie orders an Uber. As he’s doing so, he walks out of the bar, completely unaware of everything, but Buck is following him. Once it’s done, he pockets his phone, surprised to see they’re out in the Los Angeles evening.“I’m glad we met again.”
“Maybe we could do it again. Sounds like you need some friends. Or drinking buddies.”
“Yeah, definitely.” They’re both standing there, awkwardly shifting from one foot to another, waiting for Eddie’s driver to turn up. He’s not sure why Buck is still there, he could just walk away or go back. But he’s there and Eddie appreciates that. “You know you don’t need to wait for me.”
“Oh, I don’t mind.”
They watch each other for what seems like long hours. Eddie likes how the headlight of cars reflects in Buck’s eyes, bringing out different shades of blue. His heart beats faster, even though his head is telling him to stop thinking, stop fantasising, stop dreaming, just… stop.
It happens quickly. Eddie hears his ride pull up behind them, beep at them. Then he watches a twitch between Buck’s eyebrows and the next thing he knows that there are soft, but slightly chapped lips against his own, kissing him. The first second of the kiss is like a breath he so desperately needs, as if it was waiting to happen, as if it is 13 years too late. The next second is when the fear hits, when the shock hits, when the realisation hits.
He steps away, confused and angry. He stares at Buck for a moment, before looking away. Buck is about to say something, but Eddie quickly gets in the car, slamming the door behind him.
His driver is playing RnB, but Eddie’s not hearing a single beat of it. His head is full of noise, full of a dull buzz. He doesn’t even know what to think, what to feel and he doesn’t know where he should start dissecting it.
Why? Why did Buck kiss him? Alcohol is not a reason for it. Eddie never felt the urge to kiss a guy just because he was drunk. One minute they were talking and playing, building a friendship (or maybe acquaintanceship, who knows), the next… Buck kissed him.
As he rides through the streets of the city, he still feels Buck’s lips against his. It’s as if they’re burning, but not because of the anger he feels but because… he wants more.
Fuck, this is really confusing and he’s not making any sense. This isn’t making any sense. Why does he want more? Why does he want to turn back around, go back to Buck, grab his wrists and kiss the sweet life out of him? People don’t usually do that, do they? Straight men don’t do that.
Buck really fucks his head up.
He gets home soon after, heading straight to Christopher’s room. His little boy is sleeping soundly, probably slaying some dragons in his dream. Eddie’s aunt is in the guest bedroom, snoring so loudly people even in San Diego can hear it.
Once he’s in his bed, he lies there wide awake. He’s sobered up a bit (not that he was that drunk to begin with, but the vodka shots did their job), but he’s still worried to think about it. He doesn’t know what conclusion he’d come to and it scares him.
Back in high school, people around him were dating and he wasn’t into it, really. He played video games in his room or helped his grandmother. Relationships were not on the table at that point.
But even still, having a crush on that scrawny kid who just came to their school left a very vivid memory. He hid it, of course, it wasn’t a thing to share. He didn’t know what crushes were, how they were supposed to feel. He didn’t even realise it was a crush just until now.
Eddie turns on his side, hiding under the duvet. He and Christopher usually do this when the world is big and scary and Christopher needs some reassurance. Now Eddie’s feeling it. It’s all so confusing and he feels a bit safer under the covers.
The thing is, and he’s afraid to even think about it, but it’s there and it demands to be felt, he can’t deny how good that kiss was, even if it only lasted for approximately two very confusing seconds. He liked how different it was, how he felt the light scruff on Buck’s chin on his own. Maybe he wasn’t angry because it happened. Maybe that was just a natural reaction on his part, a sort of instinct he’s not too proud of.
But he can’t think about it. He can’t think about Buck that way, because he knows he’s straight, they both are. Buck was talking about girls and relationships he had with women. Eddie’s the same, even if it was mainly Shannon.
Fuck, he doesn’t know what to do or even if he should be doing anything. He falls asleep with that, falling into uneasy dreams.
He wakes up to a bright morning, which makes his headache so much worse. It’s not hangover headache, it’s a ‘this is so fucking confusing’ headache.
But also there’s someone next to him and he doesn’t even need to open his eyes to know who that is.
Eddie snuggles into Christopher’s small frame which makes his son laugh. He tickles him, kissing his forehead in the process which makes him howl loudly.
“Dad!” he says when he can’t take Eddie’s tickling anymore.
“Morning, Chris.”
“Morning, Dad.” He grins at him, squinting his eyes.
“You forgot your glasses, didn’t you?”
“I wanted to surprise you.”
“Well, you did, bud.” He kisses his forehead again. “Sleep well?”
“You came home late.”
Eddie loves Christopher, but there’s one very annoying thing about him: he knows his father very well and while most of the time that’s a really good thing, now it isn’t. Eddie tries his best to appear nonchalant, but Christopher tends to read him very well.
“Yeah, I met a friend and we talked.”
Christopher doesn’t say anything, instead, he just presses his small hand against Eddie’s cheek. “Are you sad?”
Eddie’s first thought - a kind of instinct nowadays - is yes, because of Shannon. But he realises that’s not the whole truth. He’s conflicted, confused and a bit sad. He’s not sure why he’s sad, he’s got no reason to be.
“I don’t know, buddy. Maybe. But it’s okay, people can be sad. You can be sad, too.”
“I know. I am sometimes.”
“You are? You never say anything to me.”
“Sometimes we play and you look away but I see that you’re sad.”
“Oh, Chris.” Eddie hugs his son tightly, as much as his rigid muscles and bones can take it. “You are the best boy ever, I hope you know that.”
“Can you make waffles for breakfast?”
“What if we went out to get waffles, hm?”
“Yay!”
“Go, wake up your tía while I shower.”
“You smell!” He giggles as he gets out of bed and waddles out of the room.
Eddie lies there for another minute, deep in thought. Christopher is right; sometimes, he can’t control his sadness. Sometimes, it bursts through the carefully laid wall.
And the thing is, he is sad. Sad about his fallen apart marriage, but sadder about the way he left things with Buck. Which is weird and not something he expected. He thought Shannon was the love of his life, so he should be more upset about his ex-wife than a guy he used to know in high school. But the thing is, he still can’t stop thinking about Buck or the kiss.
He debates that as he showers. There’s some guilt, some anger, all brewing in a pot of confusion. Except, that confusion has been there for the past 13 years, just hidden underneath a life he thought was so happy. Confusion because what he thought about himself is now under a cloud of question marks. Confusion because what if this means something? Confusion because what if he’s not actually straight?
He thinks that’s not the case. But there’s something, in his mind, in his heart he’s felt. Something that was waiting to be thought about, a sort of tickle he needed to explore. And when he was 15, he was certain that tickle was due to his puberty. Now, he’s not sure. But it definitely gets stronger, more defined when he’s around Buck.
He knows he’s overthinking. This is just the past playing with his mind, causing him to spiral. It’s fine, he’s fine. It was an honest mistake.
To close the dossier, he needs to do something. He wants to apologise to Buck, for running out on him. He knows he needs to do that, but he needs to build some courage first.
A couple of days later, Christopher is in school and Eddie’s at home, looking for jobs. Well, he should be looking, but Dr Phil is playing in the background and it distracts him. While some ads run, he looks through Facebook, liking a couple of posts, but he ends up scrolling down and not even paying attention.
He still hasn’t talked to Buck. He’s still overthinking it and it definitely doesn’t help that he can’t forget about that stupid kiss.
So, before he can tell his fingers to stop, he’s typing in Buck’s name in the search bar. He finds a few, with Buck thankfully amongst them. Eddie hasn’t kept in touch with anyone from high school. He’s only got a handful of friends on his account, mainly family, so they have no mutuals, but it’s definitely him.
Eddie knows it’d be better to say it in person so he doesn’t add him. - and besides, he kind of wants to see him, but he’s too proud (and too straight) to admit that. Buck’s Facebook page doesn’t exactly reveal which fire station he’s at and Eddie can’t go visiting all of them. But he still scrolls down, looking at a couple of photos, mainly all out of work. Finally, he comes across one - Buck is standing in the middle, posing with an older man. There’s a sign in the background, clearly stating ‘Station 118’.
Half an hour later, he anxiously loiters outside the station. The shutters are open - people are inside cleaning the trucks, checking the inventory or just doing their jobs, and Eddie is standing there like an idiot. He doesn’t know why he’s being such a wuss, this isn’t like him.
He takes a deep breath and walks into the station, dodging hoses and other equipment. He looks at the trucks themselves like a kid, amazed by the sheer size and power of those machines.
“Hi there, how can I help?” a voice says, coming from behind Eddie.
He whips around, seeing the man he saw in the photo not that long ago. He’s got a black uniform with the name ‘Nash’ on it.
“Hi. I don’t… Can I just walk into a fire station like this?”
Nash chuckles. “You most definitely can. I’m Captain Nash, how can I help you?”
Before Eddie can say anything, another voice speaks. “Eddie?”
Buck is coming down the stairs, staring at Eddie as he does. He’s got a black shirt on that’s probably a size too small and red cheeks. He’s clearly been working out, which does not help Eddie at all.
“Hey,” Eddie says quietly.
“Is everything okay?”
“Yeah, it’s just… Can we talk for a minute?”
Buck nods, before turning to his captain. “I’ve got this Cap, thanks.” Captain Nash gives Eddie a look, a sort of curious one, before walking away. Buck crosses his arms across his chest. “What’s up?”
Eddie does his best to avoid his eyes. He doesn’t know why he’s being like this, so unsure, so unconfident. This is not like him, this is so out of character. But for the past couple of days, his head has been in a haze. He still doesn’t know what to think, how to feel. There is just nothing but confusion.
“Can we talk somewhere in private?”
Buck hesitates for a second, then says, “Follow me.”
They walk to the back of the building and out through a door. There’s a small, fenced-off area, filled with unused garden furniture. Eddie and Buck sit on a bench, right next to the building, seeking shelter from the scorching sun.
“I just wanted to apologise,” Eddie says after a minute.
“What for?”
“For leaving so suddenly the other night.”
Buck opens his mouth and then closes it. He looks away, deep in thought as if he’s not sure if he can say what he wants to say. Eddie wants him to say it. He reckons they need to get it over with.
“I… You have nothing to apologise for, Eddie. I shouldn’t have done what I did.”
Eddie looks at him, like properly looks at him, straight into his eyes. He knows he’s playing with fire when he says, “I’m not five, Buck, you can say the word ‘kiss’.”
Buck gives him a weak smile. “Yeah, sorry about that. I shouldn’t have kissed you. I was way off base, completely reading the signals wrong.”
“I don’t think you were,” Eddie admits quietly.
He fidgets with the hem of his t-shirt, unsure of how to continue. He’s unsure about a lot right now. He doesn’t know what to do with this thing inside of him. He figured I left it behind - the who-likes-who drama, the uncertainty-about-everything thing, and particularly the undeniable fact that there is something he feels towards a guy. He thought he was over it, this stupid… crush or whatever.
“So, now what?” Buck asks eventually.
“I don’t know. The only thing I know is…” Fuck, just how cheesy this can get? How awkward, how uncomfortable? This isn’t Eddie Diaz. This is the complete opposite of him. He’s not this shy, not this uncertain. He needs to move on, to forget about this bump. “Anyway, I came here to apologise and I did, so I better get going.”
“What were you going to say?”
“That’s… that’s not important.”
Buck watches him for a second, before his face towards the sky. Eddie doesn’t know if he should just up and leave or stay. He wants to stay, but it seems their conversation came to an end. He wishes he could say what he wants.
“I didn’t tell you this,” Buck says, “but this is what I wanted to say on the night of the reunion. I wanted to say that I remember you. Not ‘cause we had English together or because one day you bumped into me with your tray.” Eddie furrows his brow. He doesn’t remember that incident, but if he did, he would’ve been cringing for the past 13 years. “Back then I wasn’t this superconfident guy.”
“Still I’m sure you always had girls around you.”
Buck scoffs. “I was new to the school and my neighbour made fake IDs, that’s why.”
“I never knew that.”
“I wish I didn’t either,” he smiles, softly but distantly. “Anyway, I remember seeing this kind of sad, kind of lost kid at lunch and I tried my best to work up my courage to sit with him. He seemed like a cool guy and I wanted to be his friend, but here’s the thing: I think I also had a bit of a crush on him which scared the fuck out of me.”
Eddie pauses for a second before he replies and just stares at Buck. His long eyelashes, the curvature of his nose, those slightly chapped but soft lips he wants to be kissing. Then he says, “Ah, fuck it.”
It’s definitely a kiss that’s 13 years too late, but it’s a kiss that was worth the wait. He crashes his lips against Buck’s, cupping his jaws as he does, stroking Buck’s cheek. He likes the roughness of his scruff, he likes how different it is, how good it makes him feel.
The kiss feels to end too soon as Buck pulls away.
“Eddie...”
“Fuck, did I read the signs wrong?”
“No, you d… I just want to make sure you know what you’re doing?”
Eddie furrows his brows in surprise. “Hell yeah, I know what I’m doing. I’m finally kissing my teenage crush.”
Buck stares at him, then says, “I liked that shy guy, but I’m definitely digging this confident one as well.”
Eddie smiles then goes in for another kiss, a slower, sweeter one this time. Now that the confusion is out of the way, he feels they can take their time. The thing is, he definitely likes kissing this guy and he’d love to do it for as long as possible.
But unfortunately, that’s not possible. The fire station bell rings with a shriek and Buck pulls away. “I’m really sorry to leave you but I have to go.”
“Yeah, go! You’ve got lives to save.”
“Okay, yeah.”
Buck starts to run inside, but turns back halfway and kisses Eddie once again, before disappearing inside.
Distantly, Eddie hears the truck roar up then leave the building with sirens on. He sits there for another minute, gathering his thoughts. Needless to say, there’s a lot of them. He feels like he jumped into the ocean from a cliff, the cold water shocking his system. Everything did a 180 and he knows it’s fast and strange. But above everything, he feels a kind of ease, a certain kind of lightness that chases all the confusion and uncertainty away.
So, those thoughts can wait, he decides as he goes inside. He’ll have time to process this, for now, he’ll enjoy that high.
Before he leaves the station, he asks someone for some pen and paper. He scribbles his number on there and asks said person to give it to Buck. Then he goes home, with a smile on his face.
It’s 7:30 at night and Eddie is helping Christopher to bed. He tucks him in tightly and kisses his forehead.
“All good, buddy?”
“Yeah, dad.” He grins at him. “Will you read me a story?”
“What would you like to hear?”
“The dinosaur one!”
Eddie smiles. He should’ve guessed. Christopher usually goes for that one. He’s probably heard it about a 100 times and at this point, Eddie can recite it by heart. But he still opens the story on his phone and as he does, he sees a text message from an unknown number: hey :) it’s buck just finished my shift wnna grab a burger?
He pauses as he grins like an idiot. Seems like he’s missed a lot as a teenager because he definitely feels like a 15-year-old who just got a text from his crush. It’s all true except he’s 13 years older than that.
He types a quick reply because Christopher is getting antsy about his bedtime story: sure thing getting chris to bed but i’ll text you in a couple of minutes
“Right, so,” Eddie clears his throat as he begins his story, “ Once upon a time, there was a little dinosaur named Christopher. ”
“Dad.”
“What is it, buddy?”
“You seem happier, dad. And I’m happy when you’re happy.”
Eddie smiles at his son. He’s got the best son in the world, a real treasure.
“And I’m happy when you’re happy.” He brushes Christopher’s hair away from his forehead and continues with his story.
Twenty minutes later, Christopher is out for the count. Eddie closes the door of his bedroom and sits on the sofa in the living room. He’s got his phone in his hand as his fingers hover over the keyboard. He knows what he wants to say but he’s too worried it’ll sound too forward.
As he thinks about that, there’s another text from Buck: man i’m starving you better text me soon or you’ll get a grumpy buck
Eddie smiles as he types his reply: i’d love to see that. anyway i can’t go out cause i haven’t got a babysitter for chris but you’re welcome to come over with some burgers……
The bubbles pop up, indicating that Buck is typing out a reply then they stop. They pop up again, only to stop. After the third time, a short message comes across: you sure?
Eddie rolls his eyes as he presses ‘call’. It rings once, then Buck picks up.
“You’re not the only one starving, dude.” Even though he and Christopher had dinner not that long ago, he can’t say no to a burger.
Buck chuckles softly. “Alright, I just don’t want to come across as too…”
“Forward?”
“Yeah.”
“I was worried about that too, I mean me being forward with the whole suggesting that you come over, but please do? I’m hungry.”
Buck pauses for a second, then says. “Okay, I’ll get the burgers and you text me your address.”
“Yeah, cool. I’ve got beer in the fridge if you want any.”
“Right, see you in a bit.”
Eddie spends the next half an hour wondering if he made the right decision. On one hand, he wants to see Buck, but on the other, he’s unsure as fuck. He doesn’t know what to expect, what to think or whether this was a good idea.
This is so not like him. He doesn’t even recognise this self-doubting, anxious mess. He shakes his arms in frustration when his phone pings.
Buck: i’m outside
Eddie is certain he has an out-of-body experience as he walks to the door. About a million things cross his mind, but they’re all unformed. Yeah, maybe this wasn’t the best idea…
But then he actually opens the door, and he knows. He knows it was the best idea.
“Hey,” he says, trying to sound very casual. He fails, of course.
He steps aside to let Buck in. Buck visibly hesitates when he walks past Eddie and there’s an unsure smile playing on his lips. But after a fraction of a second, he walks in. He takes his shoes off, puts it next to Christopher’s and turns to look at Eddie.
“Figured it would be better to text rather than knock.”
“Yeah, good idea. Chris hasn’t been sleeping well lately.” Buck nods, but neither of them says anything. Eddie hates how awkward they are; he thought they got past this stage. After a couple of seconds, he says, “Fuck, sorry, this way.”
He leads Buck into the living room. Eddie’s still got the DVR’d version of an NFL game he missed playing; he figured it would be a safe place to start with Buck.
Buck puts the food on the coffee table as Eddie sits. A second later, Buck joins him, although he doesn’t sit as close as Eddie had hoped.
“Cheeseburger okay?” Buck says, handing him a box.
“Yeah, thanks. I can give you half.”
“Of your burger? I’ve got my own.”
“No, money. For the food.”
“Oh.” Buck blinks rapidly. “Not necessary. My treat.”
Eddie stares at him, out of disbelief, not because Buck isn’t letting him pay for his share of the food, but because… it’s Buck. It’s the guy he was crushing on when he was 15 and when those feelings were confusing. Life lead them back to one another, to Eddie’s couch, on this very evening.
“Thanks.”
Buck smiles. “You can invite me next time, then.”
Eddie likes that promise of ‘next time’.
30 minutes later, all the food is eaten, all the soft drinks are finished (Buck told Eddie that he can’t say no to a big cup of Coke after his shift), and they are watching the game. It’s not a particularly exciting or eventful game, but Eddie doesn’t turn it off because he can’t cope with the awkward silence that would follow.
“So, how was your shift?” he asks, not looking at Buck.
“Pretty standard. Two house fires, a shed fire and even your typical cat-stuck-in-tree. Although there was this one pretty great thing that happened.”
“Yeah?” Eddie furrows his brows, pretending to concentrate on the game.
“Eddie,” Buck says his name softly and quietly, and it gives Eddie heart palpitations. He looks at Buck, right into his doe eyes with his long lashes. “I don’t want you to freak out.”
“But?”
“There’s no but.” Buck’s hand lingers as if he wants to touch Eddie’s and he’s just not sure if he can. “I just don’t want you to freak out.”
“I have been, though. I just…” Eddie clenches his fists. “This isn’t me. I’m not this confused.”
“Oh.” Buck is clearly taken aback by that statement.
“Not because of you. I mean, of course because of you, but not… Fuck, this is confusing.”
“You know you can talk to me.”
“That’s the thing, I want to tell you things but I don’t wanna embarrass myself or you or make things awkward.”
“I know awkward, trust me.” Buck stretches and Eddie tries very hard not to stare at his stomach as his t-shirt rides up. “I was a skinny teenager with pimples and braces when I came out as bi. I know awkward.”
“You what? When?”
Buck furrows his brows. “I thought you knew? High school. Like two weeks before graduation. I kind of did it so you’d talk to me.” Now even Eddie’s confusion is confused. He’s just staring at Buck, trying to make sense of it, as Buck continues. “I know, it’s fucked up, but I had a crush on you so clearly I wasn’t thinking straight.” He chuckles at the last bit. “Anyway, you can say whatever you want to say.”
“I just spent all of my life thinking I’m straight. When we were in school, I didn’t understand what anything was, let alone the… crush I had on a boy. It was very confusing and I couldn’t talk to anyone about it. I kind of suppressed it, then we graduated and I thought it went away. Then you…”
“Ripped off the duct tape?”
“Yeah, it all came flooding back. I’ve spent the past couple of days being very confused.”
“Is there anything you’re not confused about?”
Eddie knows Buck knows and he definitely knows how to push his buttons, how to set his heart on fire. And he’s asking the right questions.
“Yeah.”
They’re quiet for a bit, watching the game. If Eddie was alone, he’d be asleep by now, TV playing quietly in the background.
“Eddie?”
“Hm?”
He turns to look at Buck, who is watching him, arm propped up on the back of the sofa.
“Can I kiss you?”
Eddie nods slightly and Buck leans in. He’s slow and considerate, and Eddie appreciates that. He pauses before kissing him. Eddie doesn’t move either; he hates himself for thinking that if this was a girl, he’d be kissing her by now. He wouldn’t be sitting there overthinking what really is so self-explanatory.
Now they truly have the time, they’re not rushed by Eddie’s confusion and anger, not rushed by the bell that calls Buck for duty. It’s more simple, yet so much more complex at the same time. So straightforward and so not straightforward at the same time. This is what Eddie wants to be doing, but he’d also like to know what happens after.
Is that really that urgent, he ponders, staring at Buck’s lips. He can have his identity crisis later when he’s alone. He wants to turn his brain off, just for a minute and do the thing he wants to do the most.
This is what he was dreaming about when he was younger. Back then, he was afraid to admit it, even to himself. When his hormones were raging, when nearly everything gave him a boner, he did… things. In the middle of the night, when the house was quiet and everyone else was sleeping, he stuffed his pillow into his mouth to stifle his moans as he came. He was thinking about Buck. It made him feel awful and shameful, everything he thought he was was the complete opposite of the things he did in the dark. But it also made him feel good, thinking about Buck like that.
Now Buck’s here on Eddie’s couch and Eddie’s thinking about stupid things, things that don’t matter, not at this moment. So he raises his gaze, looking into Buck’s eyes and suddenly a sense of certainty, a sense of calmness floods him. For how long he’ll be staying so damn certain, he isn’t sure, but right now, he wants to do the one thing he’s not confused about.
“Buck?”
“Yeah?” he says, with worry in his voice, probably thinking he misread the situation once again.
“Kiss me.”
Buck smiles at him, softly and gently. He puts a hand on Eddie’s jaw, cupping his face. Eddie likes how nice it feels, how safe he feels. Buck strokes his cheek with his thumb, before leaning in, carefully pressing their lips together.
It’s hesitant and slow at first, but it’s easily the best feeling Eddie’s had in a while. Eddie kisses Buck, knowing that it’s been over 13 years in the making, trying to tell him that it should’ve happened ages ago.
Buck moves his hand to the back of Eddie’s neck, pulling him closer. Eddie smiles into the kiss, grazes his teeth on Buck’s lower lip and lets Buck kiss the sweet life out of him.
Eddie feels like he can’t breathe, but he doesn’t even want to. He wants to be doing this forever and ever.
“You sure you’re not having any doubts?” Buck pushes him away gently and looks into his eyes.
Eddie can’t help but focus on his pink, wet lips he wants to be kissing still. “Definitely not.”
“Good, ‘cause I fucking love kissing you.”
Buck kisses him for what seems like hours. Eddie definitely feels like he’s on cloud nine and he doesn’t want to leave any time soon. For some stupid reason, however, it makes him think he’s a teenager making out with his crush in his parents’ basement.
He hears it quickly. Eddie pushes away Buck and gives him a smile as an apology, as Christopher makes his way out of his bedroom, into the living room. The soft pat-pat-patting of his feet give him away, refusing to use his crutches
“Hey, bud.” Eddie stands and walks to Christopher picking him up. “Can’t sleep?”
Eddie looks at Buck, whose confusion dissipates when he sees Eddie’s son.
“Bad dream,” Christopher says as Eddie puts him on the couch, between him and Buck. “Who is this?”
Eddie blinks. Buck’s more than a friend, that’s for sure, but how do you explain that to a child when you yourself don’t even know that?
“This is Buck. We went to school together and he’s a friend.”
Christopher, with his big eyes, blinks at his dad, then Buck, then back at Eddie. “You don’t have a lot of friends, dad. Are you happy because of him?”
Fuck, how did he get so lucky, to have such a wonderful kid? Eddie smiles, looking at Buck, who’s smiling as well. It’s also clear to see that he’s dying to know the answer.
“Yeah, Chris.” He kisses his son’s head. “Wanna tell us about your dream?”
Christopher shakes his head and yawns. Then, out of the blue, he crawls closer to Buck. Buck has no option but to scoot backwards until he’s half-sitting, half-lying down and Christopher’s laid next to him.
Eddie’s heart almost bursts as he covers the two of them with a blanket, Christopher’s almost asleep. There’s some fear and worry in Buck’s eyes.
“Am I… Am I going to break him? I don’t want to break him,” Buck says quietly.
“You’re fine,” Eddie says, matching the volume of his voice as he scratches his head. “You’re probably tired after your shift and you probably want to go, but can you stay for like 20 minutes? Then I’ll wake him up and…”
“There’s nowhere else I’d rather be, Eddie. I can go back to a half-empty apartment, or I can… be a bed for a kid.”
“I feel bad.”
“Don’t be.”
They’re quiet for a while. Eddie stops the DVR and switches to live programming, watching the news playing silently. Christopher is taking even breaths, finally getting some well-deserved rest. Eddie would’ve thought that he’d spend this time thinking and overanalysing things, but he isn’t doing any of that. He feels good, so good and happy, looking at Christopher sleeping pretty much on top of Buck.
Then as the weather is on, Eddie asks, “You want to stay the night?” which is probably stupid and reckless but he never wants to give this up. “I mean… not because of that, I just… ” Buck is still not saying anything which sends Eddie into panic mode. “I just know you had a long shift and you’re probably working tomorrow and you’d be more comfortable sleeping in an actual bed, rather than this shitty old couch. And I just…I don’t want you to go yet.” Buck is still quiet. Eddie fidgets with the remote as he says, “Fuck, man, just say something.”
“You’re really cute when you get flustered.”
Eddie blushes. He doesn’t know what Buck’s doing to him and his head, but he likes feeling the emotions he’s got right now.
“You don’t have to, I just…”
“I’d love to,” he says with a lurking smile.
Eddie nods and looks away because he can’t bear the intensity with which Buck is looking at him.
They watch the sports section of the news without talking. It makes Eddie feel like a bad parent, a truly awful parent, but he just wants to put Christopher to sleep so he can go to his own bed. With Buck. Not that he wants anything to happen, he doesn’t think he’s even ready for anything to happen, but he’s exhausted emotionally and he wants to sleep. Next to Buck is definitely not a hindrance either.
He doesn’t know what will happen or what he should be thinking. He just wants Buck to be a part of his and Christopher’s life, even though it might be too much too soon and too risky for his son. Christopher doesn’t do too well with people leaving (and if Eddie’s being honest, he doesn’t either), so letting in Buck is definitely a risk. But he wants Buck, good, bad and real. He’s wanted him 13 years ago, 3 days ago and probably 3 months from now on.
There are conversations that need to happen, he knows that. Eddie’s so new to this, not just this whole thing with a man, but dating. For so long, the only thing he knew was his marriage with Shannon. Overall, however, he doesn’t think this will be a hell of a lot more different than dating a woman. It’s just different bits, right? And right now, Eddie’s surprisingly okay with that.
Maybe it’s due to the fact that he’s spent so long longing for Buck. Maybe at some point, he subconsciously accepted that he was crushing on a man and that crush came with different body parts and he figured out he’s completely okay with that.
He turns to look at Buck, feeling a lot of things. Some of which he can’t conceptualise, some of which he doesn’t know if he can even think about. But he wants it, Buck, in his life, in Christopher’s life, in his space, in his bed. He wants it. He wants him and that’s terrifying, exhilarating, exciting.
“Bed?” he asks quietly.
“Bed.”
Eddie reaches across to wake Christopher up. He blinks at his dad with confusion. “Come on, bud, it really is bedtime.”
Christopher yawns. Eddie moves to pick him up but he’s already scooped up by Buck. For a second, Eddie’s too stunned, watching the two of them, then he realises Buck doesn’t know which way to go.
Within five minutes, Christopher is out for the count. Buck did have to tell a very brief story about a firefighter rescuing a cat from a tree and Eddie did watch it from the doorway. When the story is done, Buck tiptoes out of the bedroom, closing the door with a soft thud.
“I can go,” Buck says. Despite his tall and muscular frame, he looks small right now.
“Come on.”
Eddie starts walking towards his own bedroom, but Buck’s not following him.
“I just don’t want you to do anything you don’t want to.”
“I’m certain I can do hand-to-hand combat if you try to do anything. I’ll even win it” he says, extending his hand towards Buck.
Buck snorts. He raises his arm and is about to take Eddie’s hand, but he hesitates at the last second. Then he takes his and Eddie pulls him to his bedroom.
Eddie’s certain he’s lost his damn mind as he hands Buck a spare toothbrush and one of his spare t-shirts. Buck is sitting on the edge of the bed, looking as unsure as Eddie was feeling earlier.
“Eddie,” Buck says, but Eddie’s not hearing him. Eddie busies himself by closing the curtains. “Eddie.”
“Yes, Buck?” It takes him a lot of effort not to roll his eyes.
“You sure about this?”
“I am certain.” He walks to Buck, standing in front of him. “Unless you’re not.”
Buck reaches for his hand, playing with his fingers. He’s looking at him, with sincerity in his eyes. “I do. I’ve been certain about this since I first saw you.” He scoffs. “That’s so cheesy. But I also had years to deal with this, to process this, not just… what, less than a week?”
“This is a pillow talk topic, I think.”
Eddie is about to walk away, but Buck is still holding onto him by his fingers so he can and does easily pull him back.
“Don’t tease me, Diaz.”
Eddie smiles at him, gently cupping the sides of his face. “I’ll forever tease you, Buckley.”
He leans down, kissing him slowly, happy that he can do it. After that, Buck lets him go.
Ten minutes later, they’re in bed. It feels so odd for Eddie to be sharing his bed with someone other than Shannon and Christopher, but he also feels this is where Buck needs to be right now.
The lights are off, only the pale moonlight illuminates the room through the thin curtains. Eddie can just about see Buck’s features, even though they’re about a foot apart.
“This is probably the earliest I’ve gone to bed in years,” Buck says quietly. “It’s like… 10. I haven’t had that early bedtime since like 7th grade.”
“Sorry,” Eddie chuckles. “When you have a kid, you need to get all the sleep you can get.”
Buck faintly smiles but doesn’t say anything. Eddie wonders if this was the right decision. He knows it was because this is what he wants, but he can’t possibly know what Buck is thinking. Is he expecting something? Is he waiting for Eddie to say or do something? Is he regretting saying yes?
Deep down, Eddie knows that if they had to restart the evening, he’d still ask Buck. It feels odd, not because this is awkward or uncomfortable, but because of how good it feels. For so long, he’s been missing something he never really understood. He’s been questioning a lot of things lately: himself, his marriage that fell apart, his career choices. But this thing, Buck in his bed, is, without doubt, the most self-explanatory thing that happened in the past year.
“Are you okay, Eddie?”
“Why are you asking?” he says, but it ends up coming out sharper than he wanted it to. “I am,” he promises, his hand finding Buck’s in the dark. “I know it seems fast and trust me I know it’s fast, but… it feels right. Don’t tell me it doesn’t feel right for you.”
“It does.” Buck squeezes his hand. “This is so embarrassing, but when we were in school I had this letter drafted for you telling you about my feelings. It’s... cringy.”
Eddie tries his best not to laugh. “That’s just adorable.”
“Shut up.” Buck snickers. “How long have you known?”
“About you being adorable? Well, we were 15 and…”
“Eddie.”
Eddie can feel Buck giving him a look, he doesn’t even need to see it. He knows it’s the ‘come on, I’m serious.”
“I don’t know. A while, I guess. Or maybe all along, but I didn’t really understand. When you kissed me I think you… I think you lit the match. I’ve never really had feelings for any other guys.”
“Who’s the adorable one now? Were you gonna say that it’s always been me?”
Eddie barely, but he sees the smug smirk on Buck’s face. He knows the best way to wipe that smirk off and he does exactly that.
It’s so easy to kiss Buck. They fit together perfectly, lips moving in perfect harmony. Eddie’s hand cups Buck’s jaw, thumb still admiring the slight stubble Buck’s got. In all fairness, it’s doing things to Eddie’s head. He can’t believe just how much he likes it.
Buck puts his hand on the back of Eddie’s neck, pulling him closer. It’s a hot and heavy kiss, one that Eddie now realises how much he’s missed. He feels like a teenager, making out with his crush. Their chests are pressed together, as Buck kisses him deeper, leaving him breathless. Eddie runs his fingers through Buck’s hair as Buck’s hand wanders to his upper arm, gripping him as if he’s trying to find leverage.
It’s easy to get lost in a kiss. Buck kisses along his jaw, before kissing him again. Eddie moves closer to Buck, their bodies are now fully against one and other. He feels Buck’s hard chest and stomach as their legs get tangled together.
Eddie pushes Buck away, just a bit, when he feels he needs to catch his breath. Fuck, he’s missed it, the making out, how heated it can get.
“We should stop,” Buck whispers.
“What? Why?”
Buck doesn’t say anything for a few seconds, but then he rolls onto his back, turns the bedside lamp on and rolls back onto his side, looking at Eddie. Eddie sees his red, well-kissed lips, his messy hair, the fire in his eyes and he’s about to kiss Buck again, but Buck puts his hand on his chest.
“You know why.” His voice is quiet and soft, and Eddie’s feeling a lot of things. Buck lifts his hand, stroking Eddie’s forehead gently. “Since meeting you at the reunion, all I wanted was to make out with you. I’ve wanted to make out with you since I realised I had a crush on you. But you need time. I don’t want you to jump into the deep end.”
Eddie nods. He knows Buck’s right. Considering a day ago, he was confused and unsure, this was a big leap. It’s been a weird week, so out-of-character for him.
“Who are you and what have you done to the confident and funny Evan Buckley?”
“Oh, he’s still there, but currently he’s pretty satisfied with the amount of kissing he’s done.”
Eddie laughs. “Speaking of, does anyone call you Evan? It feels so weird to be thinking of you as Evan instead of Buck.”
Buck opens his mouth, then closes it smiling to himself. He must’ve had an amusing thought and Eddie wants to know but he doesn’t ask. “My captain does if I’m in trouble. Which is, let me tell you, very often.”
“I mean, duh.”
“Hey!” He shoves at Eddie, just a bit. He yawns, hiding his face in the pillow. “Man, what a long day.”
“Sleep, okay?”
Eddie moves, so he’s half above, half on top of Buck to turn off the light. On his way back to his side of the bed, Eddie kisses his forehead. Buck reacts by grabbing Eddie’s face and kissing him.
“If you told Buck a decade ago that he’d be able to do that, he would’ve punched you in the face.”
“Well, I’m glad that 10-year-post-graduation Buck is not punching me in the face, but kissing me instead.”
“10-year-post-graduation Buck very much likes kissing you.”
“Good, cause I like kissing him as well.”
Buck doesn’t say anything else after that. He watches Eddie for a few minutes with a gentle smile, before closing his eyes and drifting off to sleep.
It comes much harder for Eddie however. He can’t fall asleep, not because he’s overthinking things, no. He’s just happy. So happy. So for a while, he watches Buck, knowing that tomorrow will be a great day.
Eddie wakes to his alarm. He instinctively swats at his bedside table, hoping he’ll hit the ‘OFF’ button on the clock. He stretches a bit, eyes still closed and rolls on his front. His nose hits the pillow he doesn’t use and is welcomed by an unfamiliar scent. His eyes fly open, immediately realising that he did not sleep alone. However, Buck is nowhere to be found.
He checks his phone. It’s Christopher’s wake up time, too, so as much as he’d like to stay in bed for longer, he’s got a kid that needs to go to school.
He gets up, dragging himself out of the bedroom, only to be greeted by… Chatter and laughter, coming from the kitchen. So he makes his way there, seeing Christopher sitting at the dining table and Buck holding a spatula. He’s also got an apron on, one that Christopher got his dad last year, that reads ‘World’s Best Dad (but worst cook)’.
“Morning,” Eddie says, to both of them.
“Dad!” Christopher says with a grin as Eddie makes his way to his son. He kisses his forehead and ruffles his hair as Christopher continues, “Buck’s making eggs.”
“Oh, yeah?” Eddie walks to Buck. He lowers his voice as he says, “Good morning,” and leans in to kiss him, but Buck pulls away, looking at Christopher. “Chris is fine, don’t worry.” He presses a kiss on the lips of the stunned Buck. “I hope you spared Buck, Chris.”
“Dad, did you know that he’s a firefighter?” He looks at Buck with big eyes. “He told me I can try his helmet!”
“I only let very, very, very special people wear my helmet,” Buck tells him with a wink.
Christopher laughs. “I like him, dad. Can we keep him?”
“Yeah, can we keep Buck?” Buck says with a grin, but it doesn’t reach his eyes.
Eddie smiles at Chris but then looks at Buck. He sounded and looks confident, but underneath that facade, he’s scared. He’s trying to mask it, but Eddie still sees the worry.
“Well, based on his cooking, he looks like a very sloppy dog, even though he’s not a dog… but yeah, I’d like to keep him as well.”
Christopher cheers and Eddie steps closer to Buck. Buck slips his arm around his waist, planting a kiss on his shoulder.
“Eggs and toast?”
“Sounds great.” Eddie kisses his cheek. “That apron looks really good on you.”
“Mm, I thought so myself.”
Eddie walks away, letting Buck finish their breakfast. He pours himself some coffee and sits across Christopher, listening to him talking about fire trucks. Eddie can’t help but look between Buck and Christopher, knowing this is what he wants. He knows it’s soon, but he’d like to imagine that there’s a future where Buck makes breakfast every morning, wearing an apron that says “World’s Best Dad #2 (but okay-est cook)’. Eddie really likes that image.