Work Text:
Nie Huaisang worked diligently in the small garden outside his house in the Unclean Realm.
He knew his brother, if he had still been alive, would have rolled his eyes and called it more of his nonsense, but it was soothing and restful, and if he tended it well, ensured these new budding tendrils clung to the wooden trellising he had built, he would be blessed with a beautiful, fragrant backdrop of jasmine.
The sweet scent would float in through the windows when he opened them in the mornings, and, with the other plants he’d carefully picked, including the blue and purple azalea, it would create a gorgeous blend of colours which he could translate to his paintings.
He hoped Jiang Cheng appreciated the addition of the purple, something that had been made as a bow to the man he loved. Maybe in future a lotus pond would be something he added, then Jiang Cheng would always have a little something to remind him of Lotus Pier when he visited. Times like now, for example.
The fair-skinned Sandu Shengshou sat out of his way, in the shade. Nie Huaisang knew from that idyllic summer in Cloud Recesses the other was careful of too much sun when he could be. It invariably made his nose burn pink, or brought out his freckles; sometimes both.
Personally Nie Huaisang had thought that freckles on the younger man were ridiculously adorable; but apparently ridiculously adorable was something the Sandu Shengshou was averse to being thought of these days.
Some men were so precious about their reputations, Nie Huaisang thought.
Although, as he had discovered himself, a reputation was a useful thing; something to hide behind, to plot from the safety of. Perhaps, similarly, it was a safety net for Jiang Cheng.
Once upon a time the Jiang Sect leader had cared, Too deeply. And he had paid the highest price. Now he presented a cold, unfeeling and bitter facade to the world that had beaten him down; if he didn’t care for anything anymore then it couldn’t be taken away from him.
Nie Huaisang knew he did still care though, he had eyes, sharper than most, and had seen how Jiang Cheng had reacted to Wei Wuxian each time they had encountered the other.
It had been like an old wound freshly opened again for Jiang Cheng every time they had met, raw and bleeding and so much more painful because it had been assumed the injury had healed over, only to have it torn open again.
Nie Huaisang understood; he thought he had been prepared to face Nie Mingjue again at the Guanyin Temple, but it had been like a fresh stab through his heart; years of practice at killing his reactions had been the only thing that had kept the agonised keen of torment from his lips. So yes, Nie Huaisang understood.
He had tried to offer his well-meant advice many months ago, and suggested, in an indirect way, that Jiang Cheng consider repairing his relationship with his shixiong, in order to let the past go and begin to move on.
Nie Huaisang had thought, hoped, it was time both he and Jiang Cheng stopped living in the past and looked forward to a future.
It might have been selfish of him, but Nie Huaisang wanted that future, wanted to be the future Jiang Cheng, that snarky, grumpy, yet deeply caring boy he had fallen in love with in their teens, wanted.
He had buried those sweeter feelings many years ago, as deeply as Jiang Cheng had buried his own, in order to survive. Impossible to think of love, of passion and tenderness, when you carried a heart full of secrets; a heart full of poison; a heart full of schemes.
But now, all accounts were settled, everything had played out, the world, or at least a select few in it, had seen through his facade to his rotten core, and all revenge was had. It was time for him to return to the precious things he had put aside during his quest for vengeance, and live his life for himself once again.
Jiang Cheng deserved that chance too. If he wanted it to be with Nie Huaisang, then even better.
The Jiang Sect leader had been, and was still being, encouragingly receptive to the tentative overtures he had made.
His gifts hadn’t been rejected, and indeed Jiang Cheng had sent some in return. He actively sought out Nie Huaisang’s company still; they had spent a lot of time together at the Lotus Pier discussion conference earlier that year, where he had offered his unsolicited advice on Wei Wuxian, and Jiang Cheng kept up that part of their relationship. He had even visited Qinghe more than had been strictly necessary, but so had Nie Huaisang visited Yunmeng.
It was promising, if he continued to build up their relationship as carefully as he did the jasmine, urge the tendrils of their mutual respect and regard to cling to the trellis of their continued interactions, perhaps he would eventually have a love bloom as beautifully as the jasmine he planned.
Like that jasmine, nothing would be grown overnight, however, it would require patience and careful tending. Jiang Cheng was a damaged man, indeed they both were, although in different ways. But Jiang Cheng had to be allowed to heal and grow his own feelings for them to have any genuine chance at the future Huaisang wanted.
If time had shown anything, however, it was that Nie Huaisang was willing to be a patient man, and play every move carefully.
He brushed the dirt from his hands, Jiang Cheng had been allowed enough time to brood this morning in the shade of his magnolia tree.
Nie Huaisang moved to the water butt and washed the dirt carefully from his hands. He wore some of his oldest, least beautiful robes for digging about in his new garden, and he longed to be armoured in his finest, and for a fan in his hand to hide behind. Unfortunately he needed a bath, and he wouldn’t sully any of his prized, precious fans or sumptuous robes with dirt from the garden.
And he genuinely needed to stop relying on them, at least in Jiang Cheng’s company. It would help to show his sincerity. And it was too late to hide his regard, he had played that tile already and if the other wasn’t aware then he was as beyond redemption for stupidity as his shixiong.
He walked over to Jiang Cheng, untying his sleeves. The other didn’t notice his arrival, so deep in thought he was.
“Jiang Cheng” he wasn’t sure when in their relationship they had dropped formality in private, but he liked it; he’d always thought of the other by his birth name anyway, probably due to hearing Wei Wuxian use it constantly in the Cloud Recesses.
The other startled a little and looked up, “Huaisang?” he sounded like he’d just woken up, and Nie Huaisang might have thought he’d been napping, except he’d had sight of him all morning and his eyes had always been open, just staring off into nothingness.
“Want to talk about it?” he knew the answer.
“Not really. I just...I did try to talk things over with Wei Wuxian, but I think I said something I shouldn’t have. I think he probably hates me more than ever. I...forget about it, please. Maybe I’ll be able to tell you later, when I’ve had more time to think on it”
Jiang Cheng had actually said more than Nie Huaisang had ever expected him to. Perhaps he too was trying to be a little more open. Nie Huaisang hoped so.
“Alright” he agreed, and reached over to touch Jiang Cheng’s wrist lightly. “You received a letter from A-Ling this morning?” he changed the subject, and Jiang Cheng nodded.
“Yes, some ghost or ghoul someone petitioned the Jin clan to deal with. I’ll have to leave tomorrow morning”
Of course, Jiang Cheng wouldn’t allow Jin Ling to act unchaperoned, even if he only watched from the shadows. Again, Jiang Cheng cared too much, and his nephew was his whole world, even if they bickered and argued and threatened each other constantly.
“Of course. Where will you go, afterwards?”
Jiang Cheng shot him a look, dark eyes half masked, “Likely back to Yunmeng, I’ve been away a while, and there will be things that need my attention”
I’m one of those things, Nie Huaisang thought, although there was no resentment in it. There couldn’t be, they both had myriad responsibilities that weren’t to each other; balancing those, and their courtship, was going to be one of the many difficulties they faced.
But no one had ever claimed life was simple.
“I could likely make time in a few months to join you” he suggested tentatively.
A ghost of a smile touched Jiang Cheng’s normally harsh mouth, “Please do, Huaisang, I’ll be looking forward to it”