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the blessed unrest by deathsweetqueen for Ruquas
Fandoms: Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies), Marvel, The Avengers (Marvel) - All Media Types, Iron Man (Movies), Captain America (Movies), Captain America - All Media Types
13 May 2020
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Summary
Captain America hates him.
He was sort of expecting that, but to have the man staring down at him with unbelievable contempt, well, he’s not lying, it does sting.
One moment, he’s blasting Loki into a well-earned sense of modesty, and then, Steve Rogers is facing him with that condemning smile on his face, saying that “you’re all about style, aren’t you?”
To be fair, they’re both giving as good as they get, and then, Rogers is retorting that “I’ve known men worth ten of you with none of that”, and suddenly, time is freezing all around them.
Tony curls his fingers around his right wrist, his thumb settling over where the words are written over his pulse point: James Buchanan Barnes.
“Yeah, I know,” Tony says, quietly, and then, the entire laboratory is burning.
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Bookmark Notes:
The characterisations are good.
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Bookmark Notes:
Reread 15 Nov 2025
Thank you for writing!
I love the heart dropping moment of hopless, "oh, he doesn't love me" and the reveal that they all love each other.
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“You’re in love with me,” he says after a moment.“I am,” Steve answers firmly.
“And you were in love with Bucky as well.”
“I was.”
“And you kissed me last night.”
“I did.”
“Is this…” Tony hesitates for an agonising moment. “Is this because you see me… like an extension of him or something?” he says, the humiliation of having to say this aloud stinging the back of his neck. “Is this because you can’t have him and so you’re... transferring those feelings onto me?”
“No,” Steve says, his voice sharp like flinders of metal. “What I feel for you has nothing to do with my feelings for Bucky.”
“You didn’t even like me at the beginning,” Tony points out.
“Because I saw you, and you were so handsome, and you were so… accomplished and intelligent and you… you leave everyone in the dust, Tony,” Steve says, with a passion that borders on madness. “I saw you, and I… I guess I wanted Bucky to desperately be alive, so he could have you, so he could have the life he should have had with you, and I thought… you didn’t care, you didn’t care that there was this man out there, who lived once and who used to touch your name on his skin and tell me about the life that the two of you would have together, how you’d buy a little house somewhere a little more family-friendly than Brooklyn–not Jersey, of course, but maybe Brighton or Kensington or something–how you might find some kids to take care of, all the little things that he wanted from life, and you didn’t… you didn’t seem torn by the loss because you never even knew him. You never knew how much he loved you without having to meet you, and I guess… I resented you for that.”
“Because he loved me, and you loved him, and he didn’t love you back?” Tony clarifies.
“No,” Steve says, fiercely. “Because he loved you, and he loved me, and you… you should have gotten the chance to fall in love with him. You never did, and that’s not your fault, but I just… I guess I always thought we’d mourn him together, and you didn’t even want to talk about him when I first met you…” he trails off. “I realised what a dick I was being pretty soon after that, and I started to see what a good, decent person you were and I tried, Tony, I really fucking tried,” he says wearily, like this has been burdening him for months. “Your Bucky’s, I know that, but I started falling for you too, with every day that passed, as we got closer. I fell in love with you before I even knew what was going on, and I guess that last night was the first time I felt brave enough to do anything about it.”
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Yeah, he, uh, we talked about some things that I didn’t know about and he didn’t know about,” Bucky says, rubbing the back of his neck, sheepishly.“Like what?”
“Like the fact that we’ve apparently been in love with each other since we were teenagers.”
“Oh,” Tony says lamely.
Maybe he was wrong. Maybe this wasn’t about the last time that Steve did some stupid, honourable thing. Maybe it’s always supposed to be Tony who gets left out in the cold in this relationship. Maybe this is the moment where Bucky and Steve realise that they’re the perfect pair, soulmates notwithstanding, and where Tony realises that the universe got it wrong, made a mistake, took pity on him, and in fact, Tony is still extraneous, even with a fucking soulmark on his wrist.
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Bucky nods. “I love you, Tony. I love Stevie too. I love you both
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“I want you both,” he says without missing a beat. “I have feelings for both of you. I want to have this with you. Do you want this with me?”“Yes,” Steve says immediately.
“Definitely,” Bucky replies.
Tony chews on his lower lip. “Yeah?”
Steve’s hand works its way into his hair. “Yeah, honey.”