Chapter Text
Behind her left temple, Minerva could feel the beginnings of a headache, as unavoidable as this staff meeting had been.
“There is nothing for it, we will simply have to think outside the box, and most likely should be taking a leaf out of the muggle’s books, with their expertise in communicating with each other over distances.” A sudden idea struck Minerva. “Severus, could you tell us more about this topic?”
In the resulting silence, Severus put his teacup back onto its saucer and narrowed his eyes slightly.
“And what,” he said silkily, “makes you think that I would be the ideal candidate to instruct the faculty in measures of muggle technology?”
The silence that followed was uncomfortable, with lots of throats being cleared and people stirring their teacups. Minerva met his eyes levelly.
“Because, as you well know, we do not have a muggle studies teacher anymore, Severus, and you and I are the only half-bloods with muggle parents on staff. I would help, but I doubt that my experience with the typewriter is going to be of much help.”
It had been an hour, and nerves were fraying all around. Severus did not reply, face closed. Minerva knew that she was likely the only one who saw the small clench in his jaw as she mentioned their blood status, and the way he tensed at the mention of Charity, whose chair remained empty, partly because she had not been able to hire anyone, partly to remember her. It had been a very strange year, and now that virus. She had a likely lad sent by Arthur Weasley fill in sometimes, as a favour to her, but the Department was busier than ever and he could only manage crash weekend courses to begin with. They would have to do without.
This conversation had been going around in circles for an hour now, Minerva had dismissed Poppy’s well-meaning suggestion of simply cloaking each student in the shield charm the teachers were using and renewing that every day several times, and reminded everyone of the Minister for Health and Magical Injuries’s stern warnings. This particularly curious strain of spattergroit had even entered the muggle world, which was more than puzzling, since it usually affected only witches and wizards, and Malcolm had had no kind words for the way this had been handled by his Ministry when she had talked about it with him. She ignored Severus and held out the plate of cookies for Pomona who obviously did not know where to look and took it gratefully.
“Well,” piped up Filius, gesturing with a ginger newt, “ideas taken from muggle technology notwithstanding, there must be other ideas we can pursue. Personally, I still do not understand why we do not simply issue weekly tasks and instructions via owl.”
“Don’t have enough owls, Professor,” rumbled Hagrid. “The school owls are used for a few deliveries per week each, that’s nothing to what you’re talking.”
“Muggle mail would work for a significant portion,” Severus said quietly, very closely regarding his teacup. Minerva shot him a grateful look. Everyone pretended not to be surprised at his contribution, thankfully.
“Those students are covered, you are correct, Severus.”
Septima looked at Filius, avoiding Minerva’s and Aurora’s eyes as always.
“What about portraits?”
The immediate snort that followed was undoubtedly from Phineas. Minerva briefly pinched the bridge of her nose to stave off the on-coming headache.
“Yes, please, Septima, by all means, what a brilliant idea,” he drawled, walking from frame to frame until he stood behind the pale witch who frowned at him. “Only that it will be very difficult to store your encyclopaedic knowledge of… witchcraft in a mere portrait.”
Both pause and the way his eyes flitted to Irma and Aurora were not lost on anyone, though everybody was once more busying themselves with their tea. Severus’s face was inscrutable, though Minerva could see a slight curl on the right-hand side of his mouth.
“That’ll do, Phineas,” she warned.
“What about magic mirrors?” Pomona asked, mouth half full of ginger newt.
“No,” Minerva eyed her best friend warmly. “Mirror magic is too unreliable at the best of times, and you’d have to teach on a one-on-one basis. For the same reason we have already discounted instruction through fireplaces.”
“We could use the thestrals to deliver tasks,” Hagrid offered. “They could do with the exercise and do not mind long distances.”
The pounding behind her eyes felt real now.
“Correct me if I’m wrong, Hagrid, but aren’t they a herd? Would they even go anywhere… without the others in the herd?”
Hagrid nodded.
“We cannot send a herd of thestrals flying across the country to call on just over seven hundred households, Hagrid, the Ministry would have fits, and they have enough to be getting on with.”
“I am still convinced that simply handing the tasks through fireplaces would do the trick,” Aurora said archly, not looking at Septima.
“Would not work for muggle students, Aurora,” Minerva reminded her gently, earning a dark look.
“They’d get that mail, wouldn’t they? Or what about House elves?” the witch said with some exasperation.
“Again, sending them to appear in other households would work in pureblood households, but not solve the problem of timeliness. We could hand-deliver ourselves, after all.”
Aurora made a curt gesture with her hands to indicate that she was done with the conversation. You and me both, Minerva thought darkly. She gave them all a look and put her hands on the table with some finality.
“So. It appears we are back to my original suggestion, then. We mail out parchments enchanted with a protean charm and then simply write out instructions and they could go in the same delivery as the beginning of term information letter,” she said. Everyone groaned. “It would work,” she insisted.
“Yes, but enchanting all those parchments would take hours,” Pomona said in a small voice. “And it’s been a while since my last protean charm,” she added in an even smaller voice.
“It’s not as though you are busy elsewhere,” Minerva snapped. “Yes, it’s cumbersome, but I don’t see anyone else have any bright ideas.” Her eyes were on Severus again, who avoided looking at her or any of his colleagues, though he appeared far more relaxed than during the first minutes of the meeting.
“Also, at least three of us have a good working understanding of that spell,” she added, “so we can easily go over it again.”
The headache started to pound as all her colleagues’ eyes, like magnets, were drawn to Severus’s left arm.
“I am talking about Filius, Septima and myself,” she snapped. “Though I seem to recall Aurora also had a certain aptitude for charms.”
Aurora toasted her with her teacup, somewhat mollified.
“Now, on to the necessary changes to the curriculum. I am assuming that given the students own proper equipment, practical work will not be gravely affected in Astronomy and Arithmancy, correct?”
Twin nods of faces turned pointedly away from each other. Give me first years over this lot any day, Minerva thought.
“Good. I’ve been working on getting permission for at least a part-time suspension of the Decree for the Suspension of Underage Sorcery for the period of two hours per day, lasting from eight to ten.”
A very pointed silence followed this announcement.
“Well?” She said, looking at Pomona, who had been the first to look at her again and was now scratching her ear reflectively.
“Well, Headmistress, that does seem… rather early. Given that ordinary lessons do not start until nine, usually, and they’re at home, after all.”
Minerva took a sip of tea to steel herself.
“Very well. Ten to twelve? The timing is immaterial to me, though I do think an early start and a bit of imposed self-discipline during this time might benefit the student body.”
Nobody replied.
“Ten to twelve it is,” she said with a deep sigh, sending a spike of pain through her left eyeball. She made a note and briefly pinched the bridge of her nose again.
“So. Curricular difficulties? Transfiguration does not require any changes, I take it?”
Penelope made to speak, then fell silent and shook her head. Minerva felt yet another stab of annoyance. That was the problem with former students teaching, they did not like to talk back to you.
“I do not foresee any difficulties for any subject,” Sybill said a little testily and Minerva fought the urge to roll her eyes skywards.
“Excellent, Sybill, I’m happy that you found that your students can be trusted to keep up their work with tea leaves and tarot cards. I am not sure that the same will go for the other subjects, especially the more practical ones,” she said, ignoring Sybill’s enraged tut and giving the other teachers enquiring looks.
“Charms will also not be difficult, I’ve omitted the more dangerous spells and intend to instruct my advanced course in individual sessions over the fireplace,” said Filius.
“Neville?”
The young wizard cleared his throat.
“Well, I don’t think it will be much of a problem up to OWL level if this lasts only for the first term, I’m having students create their own herbarium with easier plants I still have to put together, but for… more demanding flora they definitely will need instruction.”
Severus narrowed his eyes briefly and Neville looked at his plate. Minerva nodded encouragingly.
“Excellent, Lo- Neville, that’s the spirit. Pomona? Ideas?”
Pomona was looking at Neville and scratching her chin thoughtfully.
“Well, there are several seeds you could send out via any sort of post, but which still require supervision. We don’t want anyone growing their own venomous tentacula at home, after a- Oh! Sorry Minerva, that was in poor taste.”
Minerva shook her head gently.
“Don’t worry about it, Pomona,” she reassured, ignoring the younger staff members’s confused looks and how Pomona immediately patted Neville’s arm, indicating she’d tell him later. She could feel Severus’s dark eyes on her and gave him a very brief wry smile.
“Potions?”
His expression darkened slightly.
“As you well know, it is very … difficult to instruct students in the proper procedures and following recipes even under the closest of guidance. I for one think that this year will simply have to be repeated for all.”
The silence that met those words was deafening.
“Come now, Severus,” she admonished gently when no one else would say anything. “Surely, the easier recipes ought to work?“
“With all due respect, Headmistress, they still contain dangerous materials that are hard to procure, especially for muggle households. Where are they going to get powdered pixies?”
“Very well, what do you suggest?”
“As I said, they simply ought to stick to cookery and otherwise have to do over the Potions requirements.”
They locked eyes, Severus utterly serious.
“Very well, I defer to your professional opinion.”
And the staffroom erupted.
“Outrageous!”
“We cannot make students—”
“Even in a core subject—”
“Quiet,” Minerva snapped. “I am certain that Severus will be more than able to make up for the time lost once the students are back,” she said. “And every department will have to come up with solutions themselves, which brings me to Care of Magical Creatures. Hagrid?”
His huge beam took a lot of the tension out of the room.
“I’ve set them an observation task! They have to chart the appearance, diet, and habitat of the critters near their homes, there’ll always be summat close by,” he said.
“Thank you, that sounds like an excellent solution,” she said warmly. “Bathsheda?”
“I already sent out the translations required to all my students at the beginning of the month when it became clear this was going to happen,” the witch said with a cheerful smile, stretching in her chair. “They know what to do.”
Minerva ignored Phineas sniggering and mouthing ‘All seven of them’ behind her.
“Very good. I’m assuming that Defence Against the Dark Arts will be… equally difficult?”
Andromeda shrugged.
“They can still practice basic defence spells, so that’s what I’ll set them to do, and otherwise have them reading theory—yes, Severus, theory, it’s not as though it’s not necessary, too.”
Minerva ignored the two looking daggers at each other and that several others of her colleagues had quietly started whispering conversations with their neighbours.
“Very good. If there is nothing else, I will see you all tomorrow. Thank you for joining me.” She stood up and made a gesture to dismiss them.
Severus, having been seated closest to her, was the last to arrive at the door, and lingered, allowing Pomona to pass him by.
“Severus, a word?” he stopped in his tracks, turned, and wordlessly inclined his head towards her. “I was serious about needing input on muggle technology.”
“Then ask Andromeda or Arthur,” he said with quiet venom.
She scoffed and raised her eyebrows.
“Come now. Just go to the shops with me and let’s get ideas.”
He looked away, sighed, then suddenly shrugged and nodded, affecting a bow.
“Very well, Headmistress.”