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🍭Malcolm🍭 @The2ndMalcolm just tweeted
my psychiatrist told me having a twitter account would heal my Trauma™ by gaining validation from strangers online
Dante @MyOwnInferno replied to @The2ndMalcolm
Yikes and u pay them for what?🍭Malcolm🍭 @The2ndMalcolm replied to @MyOwnInferno
why not?Dante @MyOwnInferno replied to @The2ndMalcolm
why?🍭Malcolm🍭 @The2ndMalcolm replied to @MyOwnInferno
why not?
🍭Malcolm🍭 @The2ndMalcolm just tweeted
Wow just had my first online interaction.. I can feel my childhood trauma dissipating already. Gotta make a mental note to thank my psychiatrist
🍭Malcolm🍭 @The2ndMalcolm just tweeted
Guys.. how do I delete tweets??? Just found out she's going to be checking my twitter!!!
Dante @MyOwnInferno replied to @The2ndMalcolm
Its what you deserve🍭Malcolm🍭 @The2ndMalcolm replied to @MyOwnInferno
I already dubbed you as a potential friend you cant be mean to me
🍭Malcolm🍭 @The2ndMalcolm just tweeted
getting kidnapped by a serial killer was a lot easier to deal with than my most recent break up
Melanie @harrysqueen replied to @The2ndMalcolm
wait what?????🍭Malcolm🍭 @The2ndMalcolm replied to @harrysqueen
Oh yeah but it wasn't too bad I was only being held in my childhood home's basementKelly Moon @KM_007 replied to @The2ndMalcolm
huh??🍭Malcolm🍭 @The2ndMalcolm replied to @KM_007
Like I said ot wasn't too bad.. I just had to break my hand to free myself from the restraintsAndre @AndreIsGay replied to @The2ndMalcolm
Do the cops know????🍭Malcolm🍭 @The2ndMalcolm replied to @AndreIsGay
I work with them.. it would be kinda awkward if they didn't know
Jay Jay @NotTheJetPlane just tweeted
Is anyone else getting that Malcolm guy's tweets on their TL ??
Melanie @harrysqueen replied to @NotTheJetPlane
Me!! I cant figure out if he's serious or notAndre @AndreIsGay replied to @NotTheJetPlane and @harrysqueen
Ive seen the tweets and I think he's legitDante @MyOwnInferno replied to @NotTheJetPlane @harrysqueen and @AndreIsGay
he's definitely a troll
🍭Malcolm🍭 @The2ndMalcolm just tweeted
Contrary to popular belief the morgue is the best place to have a picnic
Jen the Fren @JennyJenny replied to @The2ndMalcolm
ar- are you having picnics in a morgue??🍭Malcolm🍭 @The2ndMalcolm replied to @JennyJenny
yupJen the Fren @JennyJenny replied to @The2ndMalcolm
at this point I feel like I should ask why you are having picnics in a morgue🍭Malcolm🍭 @The2ndMalcolm replied to @JennyJenny
it's cold in there which helps the meat not to go bad plus the dead are good company
🍭Malcolm🍭 @The2ndMalcolm just tweeted
I feel like I should clear things up.. I don't sneak into morgues I work with the police
Kelly Moon @KM_007 just tweeted
did you guys see Malcolm's recent tweet? I think he does work with the police
Monica QT @BigGirlBiggerDreams replied to @KM_007
I did! I think he's telling the truthstan taylor @MattieHearts replied to @KM_007 and @BigGirlBiggerDreams
He could be lying 🤷♀️Jen the Fren @JennyJenny replied to KM_007 @BigGirlBiggerDreams and @MattieHearts
im divided it could be a bit but something about him seems genuine
🍭Malcolm🍭 @The2ndMalcolm just tweeted
534 people now follow me.. I think this should be a great milestone in my mental health recovery but everything feels the same
🍭Malcolm🍭 @The2ndMalcolm just tweeted
I'm at this crime scene and I just came to the conclusion id do anything to be able swap places with a corpse for a day.. for science reasons of course
Dante @MyOwnInferno replied to @The2ndMalcolm
For science suuuuuuuuuuuuure🍭Malcolm🍭 @The2ndMalcolm replied to @MyOwnInferno
Dante people are mean to me in real life I dont need this from you
🍭Malcolm🍭 @The2ndMalcolm just tweeted
The dentist? Adults don't go to the dentist that's only for kids
Monica QT @BigGirlBiggerDreams replied to @The2ndMalcolm
yeah we do🍭Malcolm🍭 @The2ndMalcolm replied to @BigGirlBiggerDreams
lying on the internet is illegal i'll have you arrestedAinsley Whitly ✔ @AW_official replied to @The2ndMalcolm
I can't wait to force you to go to the dentist🍭Malcolm🍭 @The2ndMalcolm replied to @AW_official
Ains can't you read? I just said the dentist isn't for adults
🍭Malcolm🍭 @The2ndMalcolm just tweeted
Due to personal reasons I will be having night terrors for the rest of my life
🍭Malcolm🍭 @The2ndMalcolm just tweeted
meh tier: criminal attempting to kill me
ok tier: criminal attempting to kill me as classical music plays in the background
good tier: criminal attempting to kill me as 80s pop plays in the background
god tier: criminal attempting to kill me as Britney Spears' "Toxic" plays in the background
Ken the Clown🤡 @Kenny215 replied to @The2ndMalcolm
hey, um, completely off topic.. can I have your psychiatrist's phone number
PhilCantDance @FeistyFreak just tweeted
ya'll Malcolm just gained 1K followers from his last tweet
Melanie @harrysqueen replied to @FeistyFreak
I'm so proud to see him flourishJay Jay @NotTheJetPlane replied to @FeistyFreak
A lot of people are in for a good oneDanny boy @MyKindaFridayNight replied to FeistyFreak and @NotTheJetPlane
I can’t wait for more
🍭Malcolm🍭 @The2ndMalcolm just tweeted
pro tip 1: wear gloves if you wanna commit crimes that way you won't get in trouble
🍭Malcolm🍭 @The2ndMalcolm replied to @The2ndMalcolm
never mind Gil said you'll still get in trouble
🍭Malcolm🍭 @The2ndMalcolm just tweeted
what do you mean when you say my time management is bad? At 6 am I wake up. I have breakfast and brush my teeth. Then from 7 am to 10 pm I stab or get stabbed.
Laila @Laila_Is_Here replied to @The2ndMalcolm
stab or get stabbed???🍭Malcolm🍭 @The2ndMalcolm replied to @Laila_Is_Here
yeah that what I just saidTatiana ❤ @coffeebabe replied to @The2ndMalcolm
How do you know which one its going to be?🍭Malcolm🍭 @The2ndMalcolm replied to @coffeebabe
I don't and that what makes it so thrilling
Camille @ImNotSorry just tweeted
hey @The2ndMalcolm is it a crime to thrash on the floor and yell about crime?
🍭Malcolm🍭 @The2ndMalcolm replied to @ImNotSorry
that depends .. did you commit the crime?Camille @ImNotSorry replied to @The2ndMalcolm
....no🍭Malcolm🍭 @The2ndMalcolm replied to @ImNotSorry
then you're good I would hate to have you arrested for illegal activity
🍭Malcolm🍭 @The2ndMalcolm just tweeted
It's finally my time. I have completed my collection of 18000 pieces of human interactions and now I can finally be free of this app. I single handedly defeated mental illness.
Melanie @harrysqueen replied to @The2ndMalcolm
you'll be missedMonica QT @BigGirlBiggerDreams replied to @The2ndMalcolm
👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼Kenny the Clown 🤡 @Kenny215 replied to @The2ndMalcolm
no u gotta stay twitter was starting to get interesting againAndre @AndreIsGay replied to @The2ndMalcolm
take me with you!!!
🍭Malcolm🍭 @The2ndMalcolm just tweeted
Funny story.. turns out you can’t defeat mental illness after gaining 18000 followers on twitter. I looked it up and google said I need 5 million followers.
Taffy Queen @InTaffyWeTrust just tweeted
Ya'll heard the man make him reach 5 mil
Dante @MyOwnInferno replied to @InTaffyWeTrust
let's try to get #Malcolm5Mil trending🍭Malcolm🍭 @The2ndMalcolm replied to @InTaffyWeTrust and @MyOwnInferno
I knew you like me DanteDante @MyOwnInferno replied to @The2ndMalcolm
Nah I just want you gone🍭Malcolm🍭 @The2ndMalcolm replied to @MyOwnInferno
JT that you?
🍭Malcolm🍭 @The2ndMalcolm just tweeted
"Criminal" by Britney Spears doesn't feel the same after recently finding out my ex is, in fact, a criminal
Jen the Fren @JennyJenny replied to @The2ndMalcolm
Yikes thats tough was your team the one that arrested him🍭Malcolm🍭 @The2ndMalcolm replied to @JennyJenny
He wasn't arrestedVijay Chandasara @HeyItsVijay replied to @JennyJenny and @The2ndMalcolm
Yeah I wasn't arrested🍭Malcolm🍭 @The2ndMalcolm replied to @HeyItsVijay
Vijay!!!!!
Pepper Kay @MamaPepper just tweeted
The MCU (Malcolm Cinematic Universe) just expanded
Minnie 😈 @LucifersBaby replied to @MamaPepper
there's a universe?!?!Marshall Good @MG_isGood replied to @MamaPepper and @LucifersBaby
Yup Gil, Ainsley, and now Vijay... Did anyone find anything on those people to help find out if malcolm is a character or an actual person?Vinnie @VIPVinne replied to @MG_isGood
Ainsley is a reporter Vijay is a dead end and Gil has no social media presence (that I found)Bonnie @BoboIsFine replied to @MG_isGood
I think I found a JT on intsagram but im not 100000% sure yet
🍭Malcolm🍭 @The2ndMalcolm just tweeted
I didn't go to Harvard and earn a PhD is Psychology to be disrespected like this
Kell Moon @KM_007 replied to @The2ndMalcolm
What happened this time🍭Malcolm🍭 @The2ndMalcolm replied to @KM_007
the vending machine ate my dollarKelly Moon @KM_007 replied to @The2ndMalcolm
that isn't too bad🍭Malcolm🍭 @The2ndMalcolm replied to @KM_007
the disrespect happened after I punched the vending machine shattering the glass and getting the stitches as the nurse laughed at me
🍭Malcolm🍭 @The2ndMalcolm just tweeted
Dani stole my jalapeno Cheetos because "I'm too white for spice"... on an unrelated note how do I tell a certain woman im no longer her friend due to racism?
Vinnie @VIPVinne replied to @The2ndMalcolm
I have never met Dani and I know for a fact she's too good for you anyway and that you didn't deserve those cheetos🍭Malcolm🍭 @The2ndMalcolm replied to @VIPVinnie
... you're right and you should say it
🍭Malcolm🍭 @The2ndMalcolm just tweeted
Mental Health update! My psychiatrist forbid me from talking about you guys during our sessions
🍭Malcolm🍭 @The2ndMalcolm just tweeted
pro tip 2: wear a bigger size shoe when committing a crime... it throws me off my rhythm but damn I do love the chase
🍭Malcolm🍭 @The2ndMalcolm replied to @The2ndMalcolm
Never mind. Dani said she'll be taking my own advice if I keep this up. I don't feel like dying todayTally @TallyT replied to @The2ndMalcolm
I'd hate to see you go so soon🍭Malcolm🍭 @The2ndMalcolm replied to @TallyT
Tally! Hey, by any chance can you tell what "JT" stands for?Tally @TallyT replied to @The2ndMalcolm
nope
🍭Malcolm🍭 @The2ndMalcolm just tweeted
@TallyT is it Jason Todd?
Tally @TallyT replied to @The2ndMalcolm
not even close. Keep trying tho
Whitney @MonicasGF just tweeted
yall lets give a warm welcome to Dani and Tally to the Malcolm Cinematic Universe