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“Move.”
“What’s wrong?”
“I’m leaving.”
“What? You can’t leave, man. You split, we all die.”
“Yeah, I’ll take my chances. I’m gonna die anyway.”
“Rich,” Ben tried to protest, turning to give Beverly a hopeless look. “I’ll go talk to him.” He ran upstairs and quickly knocked on Richie’s door, rocking back and forth on his toes hopefully.
A muffled, “what?” could be heard from the other side, and Ben rolled his eyes, opening the door without another thought.
“Jesus, man, you can’t just barge in like that. What if I was changing?” Richie tried his best to be defensive.
“Sorry, sorry,” Ben held his hands up in surrender as a way of physically apologizing. “You can’t leave, man. Like I said earlier, we’ll all die if you aren’t here with us. And before you say anything,” Ben cut Richie off before a word could escape his mouth. “you stand a way better chance at living with this fucker dead than you would with him alive. You know that, right? Tell me you know that.” Ben crossed his arms, giving Rich a stern look.
“W-well yeah, I know that, but it’s more than that, okay? This fucking clown, whatever you want to call it, it fucks with me, okay? It--”
“It fucks with all of us, you dick,” It was Ben’s turn to get defensive. “look, Rich. I love you, but I think it’s time that you realize this really isn’t all about you . If it was, we’d all be with you 24/7, and this whole thing could be over by now, but it’s not. It’s not over, and it won’t be over until you stay to help us.”
“I’m not fucking staying, Ben! The motherfucker knows things about me that no one else does! And yeah, I’m sure it’s that way for all of you, but some of us just handle these things better than others, and unfortunately, I suck.” Richie threw his hands in the air exaggeratingly before slamming them back down at his sides, avoiding Ben’s stare.
“Then talk to me about it,” he began, earning a blank look from Richie in response. “tell me what nobody else knows. Maybe you’ll feel better.” He lowered his voice, trying to comfort the man standing in front of him.
“I-I can’t do that.” Was all Richie said.
“You can, you just don’t want to. Usually, I’d give you a choice, but right now, I don’t think any of us are gonna have much of a choice soon, so you might as well spit it out.” Ben repeated his actions from earlier, rocking back and forth on his feet in a nervous way.
“You’re not giving me a choice?” Richie practically spat out. “That's such a shitty thing of you to say, Ben. Really. That’s shit.”
“Well?” Ben didn’t move a muscle.
“Well what?”
“Well, tell me what’s gotten you so shaken up that you’re trying to bail on us.”
Richie bit his lip and sighed, rubbing his forehead in frustration. “Look, it’s just something with my dad, okay?” He tried bullshitting. “we didn’t get along when I was younger, and those memories are just coming back all at once, and it’s a lot.”
“I know it’s a lot, Rich. Thanks for telling me that,” Ben paused, carefully watching Richie’s movements. “Please, please just stay. We can’t do this without you.”
Rich stood still with his hands at his sides. He glanced at his suitcase, then back at Ben. “Fine.” He huffed out, trying to sound as believable as possible.
“Thank you, man. We’ll get through this together, I promise.” With that, he left the room to go tell Beverly about his accomplishment, but passed Eddie along the way.
“Oh my God, what happened to you?” Could be heard from Beverly, followed by an extremely worked up Eddie.
“Nothing, I’m fine, I’m fine, everything’s fine.” He hurried up the stairs, covered in God knows what, earning a blank stare from both Beverly and Ben.
“Where’s Bill going?” Ben asked quickly.
“I- I don’t know, Ben, Bill’s leaving, everyone’s leaving, I--”
“It’s okay, it’s okay, he’ll come back. At least I got Richie to stay.”
Richie was packing up his suitcase quicker than ever, not caring what clothes went where, and what toiletries touched the other. Just as his hand reached the doorknob in an action to twist it open, the door to his room swung open in a hurry, revealing an extremely frazzled Eddie.
“Eddie?” Rich paused his movements, his heart beating a bit faster. “Eds, what the fuck?” He mumbled at the sight of the man in front of him, who was covered in absolute filth.
“Don’t. Say. Anything. Sorry, I thought this was my room.” He began to back out, closing the door behind him when Richie protested.
“No, wait,” Eddie paused, giving Rich a look of confusion. “I, uhm. Don’t go. What happened? You wanna, uh, talk about it?” He stuttered a bit while trying to find the right words to say.
“Not really, no.” Eddie murmured, standing still in his place.
“Okay… Just, don’t leave.” He could hear the slight beg behind his voice, cringing at himself.
“Why? Is everything alright?” Eddie showed concern of his own, now.
Richie shook his head, feeling disappointed in himself for how close he was to leaving before Eddie had opened that door. Honestly, if he wouldn’t have, he probably would have gotten in his car and left.
“Rich, what happened? If you really want to know, I got puked on by a leper. That’s all I’m fucking saying about that, don’t ask anything else.” He pointed a finger as a sign of warning, and Richie nodded.
“The fucking clown, uh. He just,” Richie paused, realizing how ridiculous he sounded. “Jesus.” Richie backed up and sat on the edge of his bed, resting his elbows on his knees and his face in his hands, rubbing up and down in exhaustion.
“Rich,” Eddie came inside now and closed the door fully behind him, leaning against it. “What happened with you? You know IT knows just how to get to you, right? So everything he says isn’t true. Only you know those things about yourself. IT’s just a, a, fuck. A type of conduit I guess. It needs a way to get to you, so IT’ll say whatever the fuck it needs to to make you feel weaker.”
“Eddie, I’m gay. I’m-- I’m gay,” Richie didn’t move an inch while saying this. “And IT fucking knows that, so no, not everything IT says is false. IT knows everything IT needs to about me, apparently, because here I am: a big fucking homo who’s scared to even admit that to himself.” His words became slightly muffled by the end of his rant due to his mouth being pressed against his hands.
The silence was deafening after that, which made Richie feel even more agitated than he already was. He stole a glance at Eddie, who had an expression that he was pretty sure he’d never seen before.
“Look man, can you either say something or just get out? I’ve got other ways to waste my fucking time.”
“How long?” Eddie asked, slightly out of the blue.
Richie blinked at this, “huh?”
“How long have you known that you’re, um.”
“Gay? I don’t know, for a while, I guess. I think I knew throughout high school because I had this huge crush on a dumb kid, but I never admitted it to myself until college, which was an absolute shitshow, by the way.”
“You had a crush on a boy? How did I not know this?” Eddie’s expression was priceless, but the look Richie gave him in response to his question caused a change in Eddie’s demeanor. “No way.” Eddie sounded like he wasn’t sure what to do with this piece of information.
“Eds, listen--”
“You had a crush on me?”
“Yes, but just hear me out--”
“You fucking asshole!” Eddie exclaimed, a look of disbelief crossing his face.
“Woah woah woah, what?” Richie stood up from his seat on the bed as a reflex of sorts.
“I liked you-- no, I fucking loved you-- from freshman year up until we graduated. Did you ever think about the fact that maybe I wasn’t interested in girls? Or were you too caught up in making jokes about me being a “single, probably gay boy” to realize it?” Eddie looked mad. He looked mad, but he also looked soft, to an extent.
“You loved me?”
“No shit, you dick. I thought I made it obvious.”
“I thought that was just our friendship, if I’m being honest…” Richie let himself trail off, which allowed for the silence to return.
Eddie chuckled, “Listen, I’m not mad, okay? Just… I don’t know, Jesus Christ, man.” He placed his hands on his hips and shook his head, looking anywhere but at Richie.
“You seemed pretty mad for a second there.” Richie laughed nervously.
“I wasn’t mad at you, per say. I think I’m just mad that you liked me and I didn’t know, or the other way around, I don’t know.” He sighed, making a face of disgust at the realization that he was still covered in leper shit.
“So wait, you’re gay?”
Eddie shrugged. “I don’t know, honestly. I married a woman, but I only did that because I felt so fucking pressured into it. If I’d had a choice, I wouldn’t have--”
“You had a choice, Eddie.”
“But I didn’t. You wouldn’t get it, you weren’t there, you aren’t me. She’s just as fucking possessive as my mother.”
“And from what you’ve told me, she weighs about the same.”
“I swear to God I’ll kill you, Tozier. I don’t care what the consequences are.”
Richie cackled at this, “Sorry, sorry. Too soon.”
“So.” Eddie said this so quietly.
“So?” Richie raised an eyebrow.
“You liked me?”
“W-well, yeah.”
“Do you still like me?” Eddie asked this as if he were a child in elementary school, running around and asking girls if they liked his friend.
“What the fuck, man?” Richie laughed once again to cover up his nerves, but Eddie didn’t buy it.
“I’m not just asking that to make you uncomfortable, you know. You’ve just been giving off signs here and there… well, you were in my head at least.” Eddie looked down to the floor in defeat.
“Eds,” Eddie’s head snapped up. “If I’m being honest with you, I don’t think much has changed since high school.”
“Really?” Eddie bit his lower lip, hoping to God this wasn’t a dream.
“I mean, yeah. You’re still a fucking dweeb who’s grossed out by just about everything, and thinks he’s allergic to everything, and--”
“Okay, I get it. Thanks a lot. Way to get my hopes up, Tozier.”
“You didn’t let me finish,” Richie spoke in a more stern tone than before. “You’re all of those things, yet I’m still stupidly in love with you.”
“If you’re fucking with me--”
“I’m not fucking with you, Eds.”
Richie finally moved himself from his previous placement in the room, walking towards the smaller man, hands in his pockets and ignoring the fact that his glasses were sliding down the bridge of his nose in an uncomfortable manner.
“Richie,” Eddie took a deep breath in, shakily, and bit his lip. Richie was the closest to Eddie that he’d been since all those years ago, 27 to be exact.
“Eds.”
And then it was quick, but meaningful. The press of Richie’s plumper lips onto Eddie’s thinner ones fit like a key in a lock. People describe fireworks when having that first kiss that is just right, but this was more than that. It was beyond fireworks. Eddie froze momentarily, but quickly placed his hands on both sides of Richie’s face to return the kiss to the best of his ability with the stance he was in. When Richie pulled away, Eddie kept his eyes closed for just a moment longer, not wanting the feeling to go away.
“Sorry, but you smell like shit.” Richie said with the best serious look that he could muster, earning a slap on the arm from Eddie.
“You’re a piece of shit.”
“I’m a piece of shit that is loved by Eddie Kaspbrak.” Richie replied cockily.
“Who says I still love you? How do you know I’m not just holding on to some feelings or some shit? What if I just like you?” Eddie squinted his eyes, testing Richie.
“If you just liked me, you wouldn’t have been willing to kiss me while you’re covered in all of this.” Richie gestured all over Eddie’s body.
“Oh, fuck.” Eddie groaned as he remembered what their current situation was, and why he smelled the way he did.
“Well, I love you.” Richie said this in a hopeful tone.
“Rich,” Eddie spoke, causing Richie’s eyes to snap up and meet his own. “don’t worry, I love you too.”