Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

Karasuma Tadaomi has added Kataoka Megu, Isogai Yuuma and 24 others to Class 3-E

Karasuma Tadaomi: Welcome everyone.

Karasuma Tadaomi: Many studnets have come to me to ask for a way for us to communicate with each other more efficiently so I have made a group chat to allow the class to go over assassination plans without the knowledge of the target.

Yada Touka: Aww

Yada Touka: Just for assassination?

Yada Touka: (sad emoji)

Kurahashi Hinano: Yeah, Sir

Kurahashi Hinano: Can’t we also use this to bond with each other

Nakamura Rio: Yeah

Nakamura Rio: Consider it team building

Nakamura Rio: If we want to be able to assassinate the octopus, we should be able to work better as a team

Karasuma Tadaomi: I see

Karasuma Tadaomi: You are all free to use this as a place to chat if you wish

Karasuma Tadaomi: Make sure that you don’t forget the aim 

Nakamura Rio: Don’t worry Sir

Nakamura Rio: Nothing on Earth will make me forget about that sweet sweet reward money

Nakamura Rio: (winky face emoji)

Karasuma Tadaomi: Isogai, Kataoka, as Class Representatives I’m leaving you two in charge.

Karasuma Tadaomi has made Kataoka Megu and Isogai Yuuma chat admins

Karasuma Tadaomi has left the chat

Kayano Kaede: HELLO EVERYONE

Kataoka Megu: Kayano, why are you shouting

Kayano Kaede: BECAUSE IT’S SO EXCITING TO SPEAK TO EVERYONE

Kayano Kaede: IT’S SOOOO BORING HERE AT HOME

Isogai Yuuma: Alright, let’s start thinking of possible assassination plans

Shiota Nagisa: Great idea Isogai (blushy smiley face)

Maehara Hiroto: Morning M************

Kataoka Megu: LANGUAGE MAEHARA

Shiota Nagisa: It’s 4 in the afternoon...

Akabane Karma: ‘Sup

Akabane Karma: (devil face emoji)

Kurahashi Hinano has changed the group name to KOOL KIDZ SQUAD

Kurahashi Hinano: Alright B*****

Kurahashi Hinano: LET’S GET THIS BREAD!!

Maehara Hiroto: HAH YES

Maehara Hiroto: GET REKD

Kataoka Megu: SERIOUSLY GUYS

Kataoka Megu: LANGUAGE

Maehara Hiroto: YOU CAN’T TELL ME WHAT TO DO MUM

Kataoka Megu: what

Isogai Yuuma: uh oh

Shiota Nagisa: Now he’s done it

Kataoka Megu: What :) Did :) You :) Just :) Say :)

Akabane Karma: hah

Akabane Karma: he’s so dead

Sugino Tomohito: Maehara I suggest that you chose your next words carefully

Okano Hinata: Nothing can save him now

Okajima Taiga: Yeah dude

Okajima Taiga: You’re done for

Maehara Hiroto: What are you guys talking about

Maehara Hiroto: Kataoka won’t actually kill me

Maehara Hiroto: Right, Kataoka

Kataoka Megu: :)

Maehara Hiroto: oh s***

Akabane Karma: Well

Akabane Karma: he lived a nice life

Maehara Hiroto: I’M FIFTEEN

Akabane Karma: i said nice not long

Nakamura Rio: Let’s all press F for Maehara

Hayami Rinka: F

Chiba Ryuunosuke: F

Sugino Tomohito: F

Shiota Nagisa: Wait guys stop

Hazama Kirara: F

Yada Touka: F

Shiota Nagisa: GUYS

Akabane Karma: F

Shiota Nagisa: GUYS PLEASE

Shiota Nagisa: Kataoka if Maehara apologises can you please forgive him

Kataoka Megu: Maybe

Shiota Nagisa: C’mon Kataoka. I know that what he said wasn’t nice but if we want to assassinate Koro-Sensei before March, we need to work together. Karasuma-Sensei made this group chat so that we can keep each other up to date with assassination plans so if we spend the entire time roasting each other we won’t be getting anywhere

Shiota Nagisa: So please please can we stop fighting with each other

Kayano Kaede: Aww Nagisa

Kataoka Megu: Alright Maehara. I won’t kill you

Kataoka Megu: But only because Nagisa said not to

Maehara Hiroto: THANK YOU SO MUCH NAGISA

Maehara Hiroto: YOU ARE MY SAVIOUR

Shiota Nagisa: No problem Maehara

Shiota Nagisa: (smiley blushy face)

Sugino Tomohito: Wow Nagisa

Sugino Tomohito: You’re just like Koro-Sensei

Shiota Nagisa: Huh

Isogai Yuuma: Yeah, you really are

Isogai Yuuma: Karasuma-Sensei should’ve made you in charge as well

Shiota Nagisa: Thanks guys but I don’t think I’m that great at being a teacher. 

Fuwa Yuzuki: Yusei Matsui would not agree

Shiota Nagisa: Who’s that

Isogai Yuuma: What are you talking about

Maehara Hiroto: Never heard of him

Fuwa Yuzuki: Hehehehe

Fuwa Yuzuki: (winky emoji)

Fuwa Yuzuki has left the chat

Shiota Nagisa: (confused face)

Shiota Nagisa: Anyway...

Shiota Nagisa: I don’t really have good grades to begin with

Kanzaki Yukiko: Being smart isn’t the only thing you need to be a teacher

Sugino Tomohito: Yeah. 

Sugino Tomohito: You’re super good at reading people

Sugino Tomohito: Which is why you’re always writing down Koro-Sensei’s weaknesses

Maehara Hiroto: You’re always giving great advice and calming people down

Nakamura Rio: Scroll up to see example

Maehara Hiroto: You’re practically the class therapist

Yada Touka: Yeah

Yada Touka: Remember when he was able to calm down Terasaka when he was really mad

Maehara Hiroto: Yeah

Maehara Hiroto: I thought that Terasaka would have given him a black eye

Akabane Karma: He better not have

Maehara Hiroto: Woah

Maehara Hiroto: Cool it with the scary demon-ness Karma

Isogai Yuuma: Plus my siblings really like you. They really appreciate you hanging out with

Maehara Hiroto: Nagisa’s met your siblings?

Isogai Yuuma: Yeah, when he comes over to study 

Isogai Yuuma: Speaking of which, you are coming over today right Nagisa.

Shiota Nagisa: Yeah I’m walking there now

Shiota Nagisa: Be there in 10 (smiley face)

Isogai Yuuma: (thumbs up)

Nakamura Rio: Ahh Isogai and Nagisa

Nakamura Rio: The only responsible sane boys in our class

Kataoka Meg: Yeah the rest of the boys should learn to follow by their example

Nakamura Rio: Yeah.

Nakamura Rio: Karma, Maehara your boyfriends are literal Prince Charmings

Akabane Karma: WHAT!!!!

Maehara Hiroto: BOYFRIENDS

Maehara Hiroto: asdfghjklkjhgfdszx5fr3evijkr35ow

Nakamura Rio: Oh come on Karma you’re supposed to be the class genius

Nakamura Rio: everyone knows that you are whipped by our little blue munchkin

Kurahashi Hinano: True that

Nakamura Rio: And Maehara I’ve seen Isogai’s contact name on your phone

Nakamura Rio: Y’all aint fooling anyone

Akabane Karma deleted 9 messages

Chapter Text

Isogai Yuuma has added Sugino Tomohito , Akabane Karma and 23 others to Is Nagisa Alright?

Isogai Yuuma: Hey guys

Isogai Yuuma: I’m worried about Nagisa

Isogai Yuuma: He seems kind of

Isogai Yuuma: off

Kayano Kaede: What do you mean?

Isogai Yuuma: Well in the changing room after PE I saw that he had a bruise and when I asked about it he got all weird about it

Isogai Yuuma: I think he’s hiding something

Maehara Hiroto: Dude, it’s Nagisa

Maehara Hiroto: He’s ALWAYS hiding something

Akabane Karma: What’s THAT supposed to mean

Maehara Hiroto: Woah

Maehara Hiroto: I’m just saying that he has a habit of keeping things to himself you know

Maehara Hiroto: trust me I would never insult your boyfriend

Akabane Karma: FOR GOD’S SAKE

Akabane Karma: NAGISA AND I AREN’T DATING

Nakamura Rio: U sure about that hun

Nakamura Rio: (smirk emoji)

Terasaka Ryouma: Yeah Akabane

Terasaka Ryouma: It’s actually kind of pathetic how whipped you are for him

Akabane Karma: YOU WANNA SAY THAT AGAIN TO MY FACE A******

Yada Touka: Alright guys

Yada Touka: Putting Karma and Nagisa’s complete denseness aside

Maehara Hiroto: It really is kind of obvious

Maehara Hiroto: And painful to watch

Kataoka Megu: Like you're one to talk Maehara 

Isogai Yuuma: Guys can we get back on track this is serious 

Isogai Yuuma: And Maehara, you like someone?

Isogai Yuuma: again?
Maehara Hiroto: NO I DONT

Sugino Tomohito: Anyway I guess you’re right about the whole hiding thing

Sugino Tomohito: The dude’s got really low self-esteem

Kayano Kaede: Yeah he always puts himself in danger to help all of us

Kimura Masayoshi: No kidding

Kimura Masayoshi: remember his first assassination attempt

Kimura Masayoshi: with the grenade

Sugino Tomohito: how can I forget

Akabane Karma: what

Okuda Manami: yeah I was so scared

Akabane Karma: what is this about a grenade

Kayano Kaede: I thought he died

Maehara Hiroto: Yeah thank god for Koro-Sensei 

Akabane Karma: CAN SOMEONE PLEASE TELL ME WHATS GOING ON BEFORE I GO TO EACH OF YOUR HOUSES AND STAB YOU

Okajima Taiga: you

Okajima Taiga: you don’t even know where we live 

Akabane Karma: ILL FIGURE IT OUT

Maehara Hiroto: How is it that I can feel his bloodlust even when he’s not even physically near me

Akabane Karma: WELL

Akabane Karma: I’M WAITING

Okuda Manami: Well Karma

Okuda Manami: Terasaka made Nagisa wear a grenade filled with Anti-Sensei BBs and made Nagisa go up to Koro-Sensei to blow both of them up

Okuda Manami: Nagisa was saved by Koro-Sensei using his molted skin as protective coat

A few seconds pass

Sugino Tomohito: Karma

Maehara Hiroto: Karma…

Hazama Kirara: Hah

Hazama Kirara: Terasaka is soooo screwed

Hazama Kirara: (smirk emoji)

Isogai Yuuma: Karma 

Isogai Yuuma: Nagisa is all right okay

It has been a whole minute since Okuda’s text

Akabane Karma: TERASAKA

Akabane Karma: HOW F****** DARE YOU EVEN THINK ABOUT MAKING NAGISA COMMIT SUICIDE LIKE THAT

Akabane Karma: YOU BETTER F***** WATCH YOURSELF

Terasaka Ryouma: Akabane

Isogai Yuuma: Karma please don’t hurt Terasaka

Isogai Yuuma: Yes what he did was terrible but you cant hurt him

Isogai Yuuma: He already got punished for it

Nakamura Rio: too late

Nakamura Rio: Don’t worry Terasaka

Nakamura Rio: I’ll remember to bring cherry blossoms for your funeral

Akabane Karma: JUST F****** WATCH ME

Nakamura Rio: I can already see the writing on the headstone

Nakamura Rio: ‘He may not have been smart...

Nakamura Rio: That’s it’

Karma Akabane has left the chat

Karma >> Blueberry 

Karma: Hey Nagisa….

Blueberry: Hey Karma (smiley blushy emoji)

Blueberry: How are you?

Karma: Oh I’m fine…

Karma: Just wondering something

Blueberry: What is it?

Blueberry: (confused face)

Karma: Oh you know just wondering why you never told me that you attempted to blow yourself up 

Blueberry: What!

Blueberry: How do you know about that?

Karma: I know everything

Blueberry: right 

Blueberry: Please don't hurt Terasaka please Karma

Blueberry: please

Karma: No way

Karma: that a****** is going to pay for almost killing you

Blueberry: BUT IM FINE

Blueberry: I DIDN'T EVEN GET HURT OR SCRATCHED OR ANYTHING

Blueberry: It was a long time ago

Karma: But what would’ve happened if the octopus didn't save you 

Karma: I would’ve lost you

Blueberry: Karma..

Karma: Yeah I mean I would’ve lost someone to prank and watch Sonic Ninja with

Blueberry: As if you don’t tease everyone else

Blueberry: And I’ve already forgiven Terasaka for giving me the grenade

Karma: Well I haven't

Blueberry: but I’m also at fault for going through with the plan

Blueberry: he only gave me the grenade

Blueberry: I chose to wear it

Karma: he still tried to blow you up

Blueberry: You’re not going to let this go are you

Karma: No

Blueberry: Alright then you can get back at him if you really want to

Blueberry: But please dont hurt him too badly please

Blueberry: for me

Karma: Ugghhhh

Karma: Fine

Karma: By the way 

Karma: We are going to have a chat about your martyr complex and self preservation skills

Group Chat: KOOL KIDZ SQUAD

Shiota Nagisa: Terasaka, I am so sorry

Group chat: Is Nagisa Alright?

Isogai Yuuma: Anyway 

Isogai Yuuma: Can we go back to talking about Nagisa please

Isogai Yuuma: Because is it just me or does he get scared to go home

Sugino Tomohito: Yeah

Sugino Tomohito: He does seem to be overly scared of his mother

Sugino Tomohito: Like I know everyone is scared of their parents to some extent but he seems to be REALLY scared of her

Sugino Tomohito: I know that she’s a tough one but maybe more than I think

Maehara Hiroto: Well what are we supposed to do

Maehara Hiroto: just walk upto him and say ‘Hey Nagisa is your mum abusing you?’

Akabane Karma: No of course not idiot

Akabane Karma: confronting him would only push him away

Isogai Yuuma: Karma’s right

Isogai Yuuma: the best course of action would be to make sure that he’s okay and let him know that we’re there for him

Hara Sumire: should we tell a teacher though

Kataoka Megu: perhaps we should voice our concerns once we have more evidence

Kurahashi Hinano: yeah but maybe we could tell Mr K to do like a check up on the class

Kurahashi Hinano: to see if he’s hiding any injuries without making us look suspicious

Sugino Tomohito: yeah Nagisa’s really observant and really good at reading people

Sugino Tomohito: so we should try to act as normal as possible

Hara Sumire: Maybe we should keep him away from his house for a bit you know

Hara Sumire: Like invite him over for like a class get together or something

Kayano Kaede: we could have a party

Mimura Kouki: what do you mean

Kayano Kaede: not like something really full on but make an excuse to hang out somewhere and just have fun

Maehara Hiroto: If were going with the party idea i vote we do karaoke

Maehara Hiroto: and a pinanta

Yada Touka: why do i get the feeling that part of the reason youre suggesting a party is because of the sweets

Muramatsu Takuya: we could have an after school study session in my dad’s restaurant after closing hours or on a slow day

Muramatsu Takuya: we dont actually have to study

Kanzaki Yukika: I know a really good arcade we could visit

Kanzaki Yukika: I used to go there a lot when my parents were mad at me

Fuwa Yuzuki: WE CAN ALL BINGE-WATCH AN ENTIRE ANIME TOGETHER

Fuwa Yuzuki: I've been meaning to find someone to have a Haikyu!! marathon with because SOMEONE refuses to commit

Kimura Masayoshi: Fuwa I can't sit for like 4 hours and watch an entire series at once

Fuwa Yuzuki: At least read the manga

Kimura Masayoshi: Fuwa I have a life

Fuwa Masayoshi: BLASPHEMY

Sugino Tomohito: Can't you just split the show over a week instead of watching it all at once

Fuwa Masayoshi: ANIME IS A COMMITMENT DAMNIT

Fuwa Masayoshi: IF YOU DONT HAVE THE STRENGTH TO SIT THROUGH AMAZINGNESS FOR A FEW HOURS THEN YOU DONT DESERVE TO LIVE

Fuwa Masayoshi: THIS IS THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN THE STRONG AND THE WEEK

Kataoka Megu: Anyway 

Kataoka Megu: Lets try not to all just gang up on him and throw all this on him at once okay

Kataoka Megu: Just make him feel safe enough to talk to us about it

Hayami Rinka: and then if we find out that she’s hurting Nagisa we kill her

Sugaya Sousuke: HAYAMI WTF

Sugaya Sousuke: We can’t kill her

Nakamura Rio: sure we can we’re assassins

Akabane Karma: yeah but if blood makes you squeamish we could always have Okuda cook up something

Okuda Manami: I’m not sure I can actually poison a real human Karma

Hazama Kirara: I could summon an army of the undead to slaughter her if you guys aren’t upto task

Hazama Kirara: or just curse her

Sugaya Sousuke: WHAT IS UP WITH YOU PEOPLE

Hazama Kirara: My mum’s not easy to deal with either so i know how to handle it

Hazama Kirara: Nagisa doesnt seem like the type to stand up for himself though

Nakamura Rio: or we could just kidnap him

Nakamura Rio: but we still need to make sure she learns her lesson about  messing with a member of 3-E

Okajima Taiga: We don’t even know if she’s even hurting him though

Yada Touka: the boy flinches when there’s loud noise that’s pretty compelling evidence

Kayano Kaede: don’t most people do that though

Yada Touka: yeah but he also gets scared when people raise their voice

Yada Touka: or at least it looks like he does

Akabane Karma: and I’ve known Nagisa since first year

Akabane Karma: trust me there’s something weird about her and Nagisa’s home life

Sugino Tomohito: yeah I’ve been over to his house once

Sugino Tomohito: he does act different around her

Sugino Tomohito: like he’s scared of setting her off or something

Kimura Masayoshi: he is very secretive about his home life

Nakamura Rio: YEAH CMON GUYS LETS PROTECT KARMA’S FUTURE HUSBAND

Kayano Kaede: YEAH

Maehara Hiroto: LETS DO IT

Akabane Karma: WERE NOT EVEN DATING

Nakamura Rio: Shut up I’ve already planned the wedding

Chapter Text

Group chat: KOOL KIDZ SQUAD

Kataoka Megu: Is everyone aware of the class field trip tomorrow

Yoshida Taisei: I still don’t get what a zoo has to do with assassination (meh face)

Okano Hinata: It has nothing to do with our mission Yoshida

Okano Hinata: Remember it’s our treat for doing well on our mock exam

Okano Hinata: The class voted to go to the zoo

Okajima Taiga: I still stand by my idea of going to a maid cafe

Yada Touka: Okajima, no one wants to go to a maid cafe

Takebayashi Koutarou: I mean…

Takebayashi Koutarou : I thought that it was a good idea

Fuwa Yuzuki: Yeah maid cafes have so much fan-service potential

Fuwa Yuzuki: Just ask the creators of the Shojo anima/manga Maid Sama!

Kimura Masayoshi: Fuwa not everything has to relate to anime/manga

Takebayashi Koutarou: I like that anime as well Fuwa

Fuwa Yuzuki: THANK YOU FELLOW OTAKU

Fuwa Yuzuki: WORRY NOT ABOUT THE IGNORANCE OF OUR CLASSMATES 

Fuwa Yuzuki: TOGETHER WE SHALL RISE AND ANIME AND MANGA SHALL TAKEOVER

Takebayashi Koutarou: uhhh

Takebayashi Koutarou: (sweatdrop)

Nakamura Rio: Well I was down for the maid cafe idea as well

Kayano Kaede: Rio, why do I have a feeling you only agreed to the maid cafe idea so that you could force Nagisa to cosplay

Nakamura Rio: Because you know me so well Kayano dear ;)

Nakamura Rio: (winky face)

Shiota Nagisa: WHAT

Shiota Nagisa: OH MY GOD REALLY?!?!

Shiota Nagisa: (annoyed face emoji)

Akabane Karma: Well I wouldn’t have minded that view (smirk)

Shiota Nagisa: (-_-)

Shiota Nagisa: Of course you wouldn’t

Hara Sumire: I still would’ve loved that camping idea though

Hara Sumire: Too bad we all couldn’t stay overnight

Yada Touka: Don’t worry Hara

Yada Touka: we can go camping another time

Mimura Kouki: Yeah as long as Karma and Hazama don’t tell any horror stories during the campfire

Akabane Karma: (devil face)

Hazama Kirara: But sending people to therapy is one of my favourite past times

Hazama Kirara: Second only to seances and curses

Mimura Kouki: (scared face)

Kataoka Megu: Just remember to be in groups of three or more for the trip alright

Kataoka Megu: Good Night everyone

THE NEXT DAY 

Sugaya Sousuke: OH MY GOD

Sugaya Sousuke: CHECK OUT THAT COACH

Kurahashi Hinano: Mr K having connections to the Government really pays off doesn’t it

Kurahashi Hinano: He’s so amazing

Kurahashi Hinano: (heart eyes face) (heart eyes face) (heart eyes face)

Okano Hinata: Careful there Kurahashi your crush is showing

Nakamura Rio: It’s not as if she’s trying to hide it

Yada Touka: Yeah she doodles KH+TK in little hearts in her notebook

Sugino Tomohito: Uhhh you do realise he’s an adult and you’re a junior high kid right?

Kurahashi Hinano: WE’D MAKE IT WORK

Kurahashi Hinano: We’d be star-crossed lovers like Romeo and Juliet

Nakamura Rio: Umm

Nakamura Rio: Romeo and Juliet both died

Sugaya Sousuke: Uhh whats going on in the back there with Sugino and Karma

Kayano Kaede: They’re having an argument over who gets to sit next to Nagisa

“I’m just saying,” Sugino said in annoyance as he grabbed onto Nagisa’s arm, “that I’m Nagisa’s best friend so it would totally make sense that I get to sit next to him.”

“Guys, I really don’t think-”

Nagisa was cut off by Karma pulling on his other arm and then wrapping his arms around his chest.

“Excuse me,” Karma sneered, “But I’ll have you know that I’m Nagisa’s best friend so why don’t you run along and go sit somewhere else.”

“Guys, please. We’re holding everyone up.”

“I was his friend when he joined 3-E!”

“I was his friend in first year!”

“Quality over quantity.”

“What does that even mean?!”

“Guys, you’re both my best friends.”

“Hey Nagisa,” Rio sang with a smirk behind her phone (that was recording the entire kerfuffle), “why don’t you just sit on Karma’s lap. It would save everyone a lot of time.”

“RIO!” Nagisa and Karma yelled, both of their faces suddenly turning bright red as the entire bus suddenly burst into laughter.

“Well it’s obvious that the three of us can’t sit on two seats - it’s just not safe,” Nagisa pointed out as he pushed himself out of Karma’s hold, trying to calm down his flaming cheeks as he took no notice of the way the devil incarnate seemed to deflate, “so I’ll sit with Sugino on the way there and Karma on the way back. Alright?” 

He fixed both of them a look as they reluctantly agreed.

Kurahashi Hinano: AHH GUYS!

Kurahashi Hinano: I can’t wait to get there

Kurahashi Hinano: I heard that there’s a petting zoo and everything

Yada Touka: SAME

Kanzaki Yukiko: I’m excited to see the butterfly garden

Kanzaki Yukiko: I heard that it’s really pretty (blushy smiley face)

Hazama Kirara: I’m looking forward for the vampire bats

Hayami Rinka: Cool

Akabane Karma: I want to check out the monkeys and apes so I can see if I could find Terasaka’s twin brother or long lost family

Terasaka Ryoma: KARMA

Nakamura Rio: HAH

Shiota Nagisa: Karma…

Hara Sumire: So Hayami, what are you looking forward to

Hayami Rinka: The aquarium sounds interesting

Chiba Ryuunosuke: That sounds like fun

Maehara Hiroto: Just make sure not to bring Isogai

Maehara Hiroto: Otherwise he’ll try to catch them for dinner

Isogai Yuuma: MAEHARA

Maehara Hiroto: Dude, you fry goldfish

Isogai Yuuma: THEY WERE CHEAP

Shiota Nagisa: Uhhh guys

Shiota Nagisa: Why are we texting each other if we are all literally sitting in the same bus

Okajima Taiga: So that the octopus doesnt start getting ideas for his ‘Road Games’

Maehara Hiroto: Yeah

Maehara Hiroto: I love karaoke as much as the next person but if he starts singing I’ll assassinate him by stabbing his vocal cords

Karasuma Tadaomi has added Koro-Sensei to KOOL KIDZ SQUAD

Koro-Sensei: Maehara that’s mean

Koro-Sensei: (sad face emoji) (sad face emoji) (sad face emoji)

Maehara Hiroto: WHAT THE HELL

Okajima Taiga: HOW THE HELL DID HE GET HERE

Kurahashi Hinano: He stole Mr K’s phone and added himself

Shiota Nagisa: How does a state secret super-octopus even have a phone to begin with

Yada Touka: Too bad Mr K is driving otherwise he could’ve got it back

Maehara Hiroto: Wow look at B****-Sensei try to make a stab at him

Maehara Hiroto: Man, I love this class

Nakamura Rio: Isogai, Kataoka can one of you guys get rid of him

Kataoka Megu has blocked Koro-Sensei from KOOL KIDZ SQUAD

Karasuma Tadaomi has added Koro-Sensei to KOOL KIDZ SQUAD

Kataoka Megu has blocked Koro-Sensei from KOOL KIDZ SQUAD

Karasuma Tadaomi has added Koro-Sensei to KOOL KIDZ SQUAD

Kataoka Megu has blocked Koro-Sensei from KOOL KIDZ SQUAD

Karasuma Tadaomi has added Koro-Sensei to KOOL KIDZ SQUAD

Kataoka Megu: Well looks like we’re stuck with him

Koro-Sensei: Aww children

Koro-Sensei: Don’t be mean

Koro-Sensei: Think of all of the fun we could have

Okajima Taiga: More like torture

Terasaka Ryoma: CAN SOMEONE PLEASE TELL KARMA TO QUIT PUNCHING ME EVERY TIME WE PASS A CAR

Koro-Sensei: Karma….

Akabane Karma: I just wanted to play punch buggy sir

Akabane Karma: Isn’t that a normal game to play on the road

Akabane Karma: (Angel halo face emoji)

Shiota Nagisa: Youre supposed to do that whenever a specific coloured car passes, Karma

Shiota Nagisa: Can you please stop punching Terasaka, please

Akabane Karma: UHHHHH

Akabane Karma: FINE

Nakamura Rio: Ahhh young love

Nakamura Rio deleted a message

Fuwa Yuzuki: ANYONE WANNA PLAY GUESS THE ANIME OPENING WITH ME

Kimura Masayoshi: NO FUWA

Fuwa Yuzuki: AWW

Fuwa Yuzuki: Never mind

Fuwa Yuzuki: I’ve downloaded enough mangas to last me the journey here and back

(One (1) bus ride later)

Kurahashi Hinano: GUYS THEY HAVE BUNNIES IN THE PETTING ZOO

Kurahashi Hinano: IM IN LITERAL HEAVEN

Kurahashi Hinano: My_Children.png

Yada Touka: She’s literally trying to find a way to smuggle these bunnies onto the bus

Kurahashi Hinano: THEY ARE MY CHILDREN 

Kurahashi Hinano: (づ｡◕‿‿◕｡)づ

Yada Touka: THEYRE BUNNIES

Okano Hinata: You say that as if you weren’t rounding up those poor baby ducklings

Yada Touka: OH MY GOD GUYS A GOAT IS TRYING TO EAT OKANO’S DRESS

Yada Touka: Bested_By_A_Goat.png

Hara Sumire: aww check out Chiba and Hayami at the aquarium

Hara Sumire: Sniper_Squad.png 

Kayano Kaede: Aww you guys look so sweet

Hayami Rinka: Thank you Kaede

Chiba Ryuunosuke: we are having a fun time

Shiota Nagisa: Same here 

Shiota Nagisa: The snakes they have here are sure something (smiley emoji)

Sugino Tomohito: Yeah check this out

Sugino Tomohito: (picture of Nagisa smiling with a snake wrapped around his neck)

Maehara Hiroto: Wow

Maehara Hiroto: Never took you for the type to like snakes

Shiota Nagisa: I find them cool

Kataoka Megu: I’m more concerned with the fact that Karma is in the vicinity of live snakes 

Shiota Nagisa: Don’t worry

Shiota Nagisa: I’m keeping an eye on him

Yoshida Taisei: Guys come pick me up Hazama’s scaring me

Okuda Manami: What’s going on Yoshida

Muramatsu Takuya: She’s standing directly in front of the glass of the bat enclosure and whispering under her breath and staring at them

Hazama Kirara: I’m trying to become one with my people

Yoshida Taisei: HOW ARE YOU TYPING WITHOUT LOOKING AT YOUR PHONE

Hazama Kirara: (smirk)

Hazama Kirara: I’m increasing the ranks of my army

Okajima Taiga: Where are our teachers though?

Kayano Kaede: Koro-sensei is with me at the dessert cafe, B****-Sensei is flirting with the Zookeepers and Karasuma Sensei is babysitting both of them

Kayano Kaede: Poor_Man_Never_Gets_A_Break.png

Rio Nakamura: Wow 

Rio Nakamura: He looks so done with life

Kataoka Megu: Guys we’re about to eat lunch so meet up at the cafeteria

Hara Sumire: Kurahashi, Yada, Kaede, Okuda and Hayami at the gift shop

Hara Sumire: (a picture of the girls with their arms stuffed with small animal plushies)

Yada Touka: I’m so getting all of these

Sugaya Sousuke: HOW MANY STUFFED ANIMALS DO YOU GIRLS NEED

Hayami Rinka: All of them

Rio Nakamura: Those girls weren’t the only ones who got toys though

Rio Nakamura: Nice snake, Nagisa ;)

Shiota Nagisa: TBH Karma’s the one who bought it for me

Kayano Kaede: Awww

Kayano Kaede: That’s so sweet

Akabane Karma: Whatever

Akabane Karma: I just felt like gettin it

Yada Touka: Today was fun

Kurahashi Hinano: Yeah totally

Kurahashi Hinano: Even though I had to abandon my children

Terasaka Ryoma: I would have had more fun if Karma didn’t try to shove me into a lion cage 

Okajima Taiga: Alright next field trip we’re definitely going to the beach

Kataoka Megu: Well see...

Nakamura Rio: Guys guys Nagisa and Karma are sleeping on each other’s shoulders

Nakamura Rio: Oblivious_Idiots(42).png (Yes, Nagisa has the stuffed snake toy wrapped around his neck)

Fuwa Yuzuki: AHHH

Fuwa Yuzuki: OTP

Okano Hinata: And look at our class Ikeman resting on the resident playboy

Okano Hinata: Pure_And_Player.png

Maehara Hiroto: DELETE THAT IMMEDIATELY

Chapter Text

Maehara Hiroto: Guys, guys

Maehara Hiroto: Guess who just beat Isogai at UNO!

Maehara Hiroto: (selfie of him and Isogai in sleeping yukatas with cards in between them)

Okano Hinata: I’m pretty sure Isogai let you win 

Okano Hinata: He doesn’t like using plus fours

Maehara Hiroto: HEY

Maehara Hiroto: I WON FAIR AND SQUARE ALRIGHT

Maehara Hiroto: (grumpy face emoji)

Nakamura Rio: so what are you two lovebirds doing together this late anyway 

Nakamura Rio: (winky smirk face)

Isogai Yuuma: We’re having a sleepover

Isogai Yuuma: WAIT ‘LOVEBIRDS’????????

Shiota Nagisa: OMG

Shiota Nagisa: SAME

Maehara Hiroto: ?

Maehara Hiroto: what do you mean Nagisa

Sugino Tomohito: Nagisa is having a sleepover at my house as well

Sugino Tomohito: (selfie of him and Nagisa cooking with a mixing bowl)

Sugino Tomohito: we’re making cookies

Shiota Nagisa: to eat in our blanket fort

Kurahashi Hinano: YOU GUYS MADE A BLANKET FORT

Yada Toka: OMG SEND PICS

Okajima Taiga: wait wait wait

Okajima Taiga: Those wouldn’t happen to be the cookies that Nagisa made for that celebration party last month that tasted like HEAVEN, right

Shiota Nagisa: yeah, it’s the same recipe

Okajima Taiga: OH CMON NO FAIR

Okajima Taiga: HOW COME SUGINO GETS TO HAVE MORE

Okajima Taiga: HE PRACTICALLY HAD ALL OF THEM AT THE PARTY

Sugino Tomohito: Best Friend Privileges, dude

Okajima Taiga: NAGISA SAID TWO EACH DUDE

Okajima Taiga: YOU ATE FOUR

Sugino Tomohito: Again

Sugino Tomohito: Best Friend Privileges

Shiota Nagisa: so we put the cookies in the oven so we’ll show you the blanket fort

Shiota Nagisa: pillow_fort.png

Kimura Masayoshi: HOLY S*** GUYS

Kimura Masayoshi: THAT’S AWESOME

Sugino Tomohito: yeah we’re going to eat cookies and binge-watch those sports dramas Koro-Sensei recommended us

Sugino Tomohito: We’re gonna have so much fun

Shiota Nagisa: (smiley emoji)

Shiota Nagisa: yeah we had sushi and everything

Nakamura Rio: Wow looks like a blast

Nakamura Rio: @Akabane Karma thoughts?

Akabane Karma: why should I have thoughts

Nakamura Rio: just asking

Akabane Karma: BTW you didn’t tell me that you were sleeping over at Sugino’s Nagisa

Shiota Nagisa: oh didn’t I?

Akabane Karma: no, you didnt

Shiota Nagisa: it’s not really a big deal

Shiota Nagisa: we hung out a lot before you joined E Class but we never really had a sleepover so Sugino suggested that we should have one at his place

Kurahashi Hinano: Sleepovers sound so fun

Kurahashi Hinano: we should have one together as a class

Yada Touka: It does sound interesting

Sugaya Sousuke: OK but how are we supposed to have a class sleepover

Sugaya Sousuke: there’s over 20 of us

Akabane Karma: yeah and how would any of us sleep if Terasaka’s gonna be there snoring like a tractor

Terasaka Ryouma: OI 

Terasaka Ryouma: WATCH IT

Fuwa Yuzuki: Oh I know a place

Fuwa Yuzuki: My Uncle’s on holiday and his house is kinda big and close to the school so I can ask him if I can host a sleepover there

Fuwa Yuzuki: He’s super chill so he’ll most likely say yes

…

Fuwa Yuzuki: I texted him and he says sure as long as we don’t disturb the neighbours and clean up after

Kayano Kaede: Wow

Kayano Kaede: What are the odds that you just happened to have a place free

Fuwa Yuzuki: It’s most likely because the author wanted a reason for us to have a slice of life fun sleepover so they are hoping that that the reader would suspend their disbelief and not raise any eyebrows for the clearly rushed and not well thought out excuse for this plot-convenient scenario 

Hara Sumire: huh

Kimura Masayoshi: what are you talking about

Fuwa Yuzuki: hehe

Fuwa Yuzuki: anyways we could all go there next Friday if everyone’s free

Sugino Tomohito: I’d totally go

Sugino Tomohito: It’s fun having group sleepovers

Sugino Tomohito: we used to have them back when I was in the baseball club

Sugino Tomohito: Shindo used to get so annoyed because he likes to sleep early but Hashimoto would stay up until 1 am

Shiota Nagisa: I’m game 

Shiota Nagisa: (thumbs up)

Akabane Karma: Yeah, sure, I’m down

Kurahashi Hinano: I CAN COME :)

Okajima Taiga: ARE YOU SERIOUSLY ASKING

Okajima Taiga: OF COURSE I’M COMING

Kataoka Megu: I guess I should come to make sure the boys behave themselves

Isogai Yuuma: Same here

Maehara Hiroto: Oh come one Isogai we know how to behave

Maehara Hiroto: And I’m coming BTW

Okano Hinata: I asked my parents and they said yes (happy emoji)

Kimura Masayoshi: I can make it
Kayano Kaede: Same here

Nakamura Rio: ^
Mimura Kouki: ^

Yada Touka: ^

Takabayashi Koutarou: ^

Hayami Rinka: ^

Kanzaki Yukiko: ^

Yoshida Taisei: ^

Hara Sumire: I’m coming

Sugaya Sousoke: Count me in

Okuda Manami: me too

Chiba Ryuunosuke: same here

Hazama Kirara: I’ve got nothing better to do

Muramatsu Takuya: I’m in

Terasaka Ryouma: yeah whatever

(*French Spongebob Narrator Voice* A few days later…)

Hara Sumire: so should we bring money to order takeout or bring food or what?

Fuwa Yuzuki: No need

Fuwa Yuzuki: My mother let me order dinner

Fuwa Yuzuki: So I got five boxes of large pizzas and a few large platters from that sushi place near the train station next to Kunigogaoka 

Shiota Nagisa: I LOVE SUSHI (yum face)

Nakamura Rio: We know Nagisa (smirk face)

Fuwa Yuzuki: So we meeting at the address at 6:00 pm

Yada Touka: YEP

Yada Touka: CAN’T WAIT

Kurahashi Hinano: So question

Kurahashi Hinano: which animal should I bring?

Kurahashi Hinano: my_babies.jpg

Okajima Taiga: HOLY S***

Okajima Taiga: How many stuffed animals do you have

Kurahashi Hinano: not enough

(A few hours later)

Nakamura Rio: Hey Nagisa come here quick the girls are planning a runway fashion show and we want you to join

Shiota Nagisa: uhh, no thanks Rio (-_-)

Nakamura Rio: no fair

Okajima Taiga: FASHION SHOW

Okajima Taiga: CAN I JOIN

Yada Touka: NO WAY IN HELL

Kataoka Megu: It’s going to be a long night

Shiota Nagisa: BTW Isogai, Hara, Muramatsu and I are bringing cooking/baking stuff 

Hara Sumire: We’re planning on making the greatest dessert ever

Hara Sumire: and so that Nagisa will make more cookies

Kayano Kaede: YES

Kayano Kaede: YOU GUYS ARE AWESOME

Okano Hinata: Can one of you guys make sure Okajima or Maehara don’t peek

Okano Hinata: we’re planning on changing into our pyjamas

Maehara Hiroto: I’VE NEVER EVEN DONE ANYTHING

Isogai Yuuma: I’ll keep an eye on the boys

Terasaka Ryouma: ALRIGHT WHO HID MY BAG

Shiota Nagisa: Karma, give Terasaka back his bag

Akabane Karma: What made you think it was me

Shiota Nagisa: Karma... 

Maehara Hiroto: Guys in the kitchen, cmon to the living room we’re doing karaoke and playing games

Fuwa Yuzuki: Okay for the Karaoke we all have to do one of ‘Seishun Satsubatsurou’, ‘Jiriki hongan revolution’, or ‘Question’

Hazama Kirara: I don’t sing

Sugino Tomohito: SOS

Sugino Tomohito: ISOGAI NAGISA HELP

Shiota Nagisa: What’s going on?

Sugino Tomohito: Rio and Karma have started a pillow fighting war 

Sugino Tomohito: Everyone’s turned feral

Sugino Tomohito: Nowhere is safe

Mimura Kouki: I’m hiding in a closet with a handful of cookies until this all blows over

Sugino Tomohito: Holy c*** Fuwa has started playing epic dramatic anime songs and quoting probable manga/anime sayings as she beats up Kimura with a pillow

Sugino Tomohito: Fuwa_has_lost_it.mp4

Shiota Nagisa: Is that Takabayashi in the background playing ‘Um whatcha say’

Yada Touka: GUYS GUYS GUYS

Yada Touka: LOOK WHAT I’VE FOUND

Yada Touka: (picture of Maehara sleeping, slouching against a wall with Isogai asleep, resting his head on Maehara’s lap)

Okano Hinata: AWW SWEET

Okano Hinata: I’m so adding this to my collection

Nakamura Rio: How about I do you guys one better

Nakamura Rio: (picture of Karma and Nagisa asleep with Karma’s arm wrapped around Nagisa)

Fuwa Yuzuki: AHHHH MY SHIPS ARE SAILING

Fuwa Yuzuki: THIS SLEEPOVER WAS THE BEST IDEA EVER

BONUS:

Every student woke up to find these messages on their phones:

Koro-Sensei: I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU HAD A PARTY WITHOUT ME :(

Koro-Sensei: AM I NOT COOL ENOUGH FOR YOU

Chapter Text

Nakamura Rio has added Kayano Kaede , Sugino Tomohito and 22 others to URGENT BUSINESS

Nakamura Rio: Guys I’ve got some urgent business

Sugino Tomohito: Yeah I kind of got that from the group name

Kayano Kaede: Same here

Fuwa Yuzuki: Yeah what’s going on Rio

Fuwa Yuzuki: I was in the middle of watching Bungo Stray Dogs 

Nakamura Rio: Weeellllll

Nakamura Rio: Everyone’s aware of the sparks flying between Karma and Nagisa 

Maehara Hiroto: duh

Sugino Tomohito: Yeah

Kayano Kaede: they're not really doing much to hide it

Nakamura Rio: You’re absolutely right guys

Nakamura Rio: which is why I think that we, as their loving classmates, should help those oblivious idiots

Okano Hinata: oooh

Okano Hinata: I see where this is going (smirk face)

Kurahashi Hinano: Me too (smiley face)

Nakamura Rio: WE SHOULD INVESTIGATE THE NATURE OF THEIR RELATIONSHIP

Kataoka Megu: …

Kataoka Megu: you mean stalk them

Nakamura Rio: what no we’re not going to stalk them

Fuwa Yuzuki: Well I was planning on finishing my Kagehina slow burn fanfiction but this is definitely is more important

Fuwa Yuzuki: I can feel my real life OTP become canon 

Nakamura Rio: we’re going to gather research on our classmates thats all

Nakamura Rio: think of it as assassination training

Maehara Hiroto: I’m in (thumbs up)

Isogai Yuuma: how is stalking Karma and Nagisa assassination training

Nakamura Rio: we’d be practicing our intelligence gathering skills

Nakamura Rio: you know, so we can use them on the octopus later

Nakamura Rio: and we can find out if those two are closer than they say they are

Kayano Kaede: YES

Kayano Kaede: I know that Karma’s planning on taking Nagisa to the mall to see the new sushi place that opened up at the food court

Kayano Kaede: and they were going to check out some stores as well

Maehara Hiroto: how do you know that

Sugino Tomohito: It might have something to do with the fact that when Kayano invited Nagisa to come to the cafe with us, Karma just started loudly bragging about how he already invited him that day 

Kayano Kaede: whilst hugging him

Okajima Taiga:  oooooohhhhhh 

Sugaya Sousuke: how would we even know if their dating tho

Sugaya Sousuke: it’s not like we know anyone who’s in a relationship

Hayami Rinka: Chiba and I are dating

Sugaya Sousuke: oh really

Sugaya Sousuke: how did you guys get together 

Chiba Ryuunosuke: She asked me if I wanted to date and I said yes

Sugaya Sousuke: huh

Isogai Yuuma: You know I really don’t approve of you guys stalking our classmates

Maehara Hiroto: but we stalk you at the cafe

Isogai Yuuma: I know

Okajima Taiga: IM SORRY IS NOONE GOING TO REACT TO THE FACT THAT CHIBA AND HAYAMI ARE DATING

Okajima Taiga: AM I THE ONLY ONE HERE THAT NEVER KNEW

Mimura Kouki: It’s not that we didnt know Okajima

Mimura Kouki: It’s just that we never questioned it

Nakamura Rio: YEAH

Nakamura Rio: UNLIKE SOME PEOPLE, THEY DON’T MAKE THEIR PINING AND ROMANTIC TENSION  KNOWN TO THE HEAVENS AND SPEND THEIR DAYS DENYING THEIR FEELINGS AND TURNING OUR CLASSROOM INTO SOME DRAMATIC SOAP OPERA/K DRAMA

Okano Hinata: @Maehara Hiroto @Isogai Yuuma

Maehara Hiroto: WHAT THE HELL, OKANO

Isogai Yuuma: Why am I tagged?

Okano >> Nakamura

Okano: Okay, once we do Karma and Nagisa, Playboy and Ikeman are next

Nakamura: (thumbs up emoji)

Group Chat: URGENT BUSINESS

Nakamura Rio: So it’s decided that we go and watch Karma and Nagisa’s date

Yoshida Taisei: I dont think its a date, Nakamura

Nakamura Rio: YES IT IS

Okano Hinata: YES IT IS

Fuwa Yuzuki: YES IT IS I SWEAR TO GOD YOSHIDA IF YOU EVEN THINK ABOUT SINKING MY SHIP I WILL GO FULL ON SEBASTIAN MICHAELIS ON YOUR SH*TTY MOTOR-CYCLE LOVING A** YOU HEAR ME

Yoshida Taisei: (scared face emoji)

Muramatsu Takuya: The hell 

Yoshida Taisei: Yes Fuwa

Kimura Masayoshi: Note to self: do not mess with the otaku

Fuwa Yuzuki: DO NOT RUIN THIS FOR ME

Fuwa Yuzuki: I feel like I’m in a Shojo Manga (heart eyes emoji)

Nakamura Rio: So here’s what’s going to happen:

Nakamura Rio: We split ourselves into groups and place ourselves in different areas around the mall and switch positions every half hour

Nakamura Rio: we text our observations into this group chat so we all know what’s going on

Nakamura Rio: Takabayashi is going to hack into the mall security cameras so that we can get live feed of them

Takabayashi Koutarou: why me

Nakamura Rio: Because you’re the best hacker/computer whiz kid

Mimura Kouki: why cant you just ask Ritsu to do it

Nakamura Rio: she says that it’s ‘against the law’

Yoshida Taisei: Wait if glasses is going to going to hacking into live CCTV cameras why do we need to spy on them

Takabayashi Koutarou: CCTV cameras only provide visual recordings and I assume that Nakamura would also like to hear what they’re saying

Yoshida Taisei: then why not just bug them

Maehara Hiroto: you have met Karma and Nagisa, right?

Yoshida Taisei: noted

Yoshida Taisei: what about having Ritsu listen in on their phones

Sugino Tomohito: again

Sugino Tomohito: you have met them, right?

Fuwa Yuzuki: ALRIGHT GUYS

Fuwa Yuzuki: OPERATION KARMAGISA IS A GO

Kimura Masayoshi: Karmagisa….?

Nakamura Rio: just go with it

A FEW DAYS LATER...

Nakamura Rio: Alright the Terasaka squad are with Takabayshi looking over the CCTV footage

Terasaka Ryouma: I still dont see why the whole class has to be in on this

Nakamura Rio: because Teriyaki 

Nakamura Rio: Ohana means family and family means no one gets left behind or forgotten

Maehara Hiroto: plus dont you wish that the two of them would stop dancing around each other

Terasaka Ryouma: i suppose its getting a bit painful to watch

Okajima Taiga: but if they did get together, wouldnt we just have to deal with Karma flirting with Nagisa even more 

Maehara Hiroto: I

Maehara Hiroto: I did not think of that

Fuwa Yuzuki: YOU BETTER NOT BE BACKING DOWN WOMANIZER 

Maehara Hiroto: NO IM NOT I SWEAR 

Takabayashi Koutarou: Nagisa and Karma have entered the mall

Okajima Taiga: I still dont see why we have to wear fake mustaches and sunglasses

Fuwa Yuzuki: So that we dont get recognised

Okajima Taiga: but why are you wearing them…

Mimura Kouki: yeah if anything were standing out

Fuwa Yuzuki: oh hush you I’ve been waiting for this moment

Nakamura Rio: SHUT UP EVERYONE THEYRE HERE

Kayano Kaede: AWW 

Kayano Kaede: Karma opened the door for Nagisa

Kataoka Megu: that doesnt really say much

Yada Touka: alright whats going on now

Okajima Taiga: nothing much

Okajima Taiga: they ordered and just went to get seats

Okajima Taiga: theyre just talking about school 

Fuwa Yuzuki: Alright now Karma’s flirting with him

Nakamura Rio: OH MY GOD NAGISA’S BLUSHING SO HARD

Fuwa Yuzuki: WHEN THEY DO GET TOGETHER KARMA BETTER NOT HURT HIM OTHERWISE I WILL MAKE HIM FEEL THE WRATH OF A P*SSED OFF OTAKU

Sugino Tomohito: get in line

Terasaka Ryouma: Not before I get to him first

Maehara Hiroto: Fuwa I think we all will make sure Karma gets his dues if he were to ever hurt our precious cinnamon roll

Hara Sumire: :)

Okajima Taiga: Okay did anyone else almost pee themselves or was it just me

Kimura Masayoshi: no i did as well

Sugaya Sousuke: God Hara

Sugaya Sousuke: you can be scary sometimes

Sugaya Sousuke: I got literal chills

Hara Sumire: as the class mum, i have unofficially adopted Nagisa as my son

Hara Sumire: anyone who tries to hurt my child must face the consequences :)

Nakamura Rio: GUYS GUYS GUYS YOU WONT BELIEVE WHAT JUST HAPPENED

Nakamura Rio: SO KARMA STOLE A PIECE OF NAGISA’S SUSHI AND WHEN NAGISA GOT ANNOYED KARMA SAID “HERE WHY NOT TRY ONE OF MINE’ AND THEN HE FRICKIN USED HIS OWN CHOPSTICKS TO HOLD THE SUSHI IN FRONT OF NAGISA’S FACE

Fuwa Yuzuki: AAAAAAHHHHH THIS REALLY IS LIKE A SHOJO MANGA

Kayano Kaede: OMG I CANT EVEN

Fuwa Yuzuki: NAGISA ACTUALLY ATE IT OH MY GOD KARMA LITERALLY JUST FED NAGISA SUSHI USING HIS OWN CHOPSTICKS WAIT A MINUTE WONT THAT COUNT AS AN INDIRECT KISS OH MY GOD THIS IS AMAZING

Okajima Taiga: Holy sh*t Karma’s actually blushing now because Nagisa said thank you

Okajima Taiga: i didnt even know that he knew how to blush

--------

“Uhh, Karma?” Nagisa asked the red head, his brows furrowed despite his still flaming cheeks, “do you hear squealing?”

---------

Nakamura Rio: Alright they paid and left

Nakamura Rio: groups near the comic book and video game stores stay alert

Takabayashi Koutarou: they’re headed towards the video game store next to the water fountain

Maehara Hiroto: Roger that (thumbs up emoji)

Blueberry >> Karma

Blueberry: hey Karma

Karma: Yeah Nagi?

Blueberry: Is it just me or did we just pass someone that looks a lot like Fuwa wearing a fake mustache

Karma: You think the class is spying on us

Blueberry: I kept on sensing that we were being spied on back at the cafe

Karma: Yeah i felt like something was off as well

Blueberry: why would they be here though

Blueberry: you don’t think that they wanted to check out the opening of the new sushi restaurant as well

Blueberry: we could’ve invited them 

Blueberry: they knew we were coming here since you decided to yell about it back at school

Karma: Don’t worry about it

Karma: lets just go see if they have that Sonic Ninja video game that we saw in that magazine you showed me

Group Chat: URGENT BUSINESS

Maehara Hiroto: alright team Karmagisa has entered  the store

Fuwa Yuzuki: YES THATS WHAT IM TALKING ABOUT

Isogai Yuuma: Theyre going to be so mad when they realise that we are spying on them

Maehara Hiroto: Oh hush you this is fun

Kanzaki Yukiko: They seem to just be browsing through like theyre looking for something

Kanzaki Yukiko: oh wait they got a game

Kurahashi Hinano: aww Karma got a game for him and for Nagisa thats so sweet

Kurahashi Hinano: Nagisa looks so happy

Yada Touka: wait where are they going

Takabayashi Koutarou: they seem to be leaving

Kurahashi Hinano: so soon?

Takabayashi Koutarou: they left the mall

A FEW HOURS LATER

Group Chat: Is Nagisa Alright?

Akabane Karma: Alright you idiots have three seconds to explain why you were stalking me and Nagisa back at the mall

Isogai Yuuma: told you

Nakamura Rio: we just wanted to see if you guys had fun on your date

Nakamura Rio: (smirk face)

Akabane Karma: IT WASNT A DATE

Fuwa Yuzuki: Not even a little one

Okajima Taiga: Yeah we saw the way you guys were looking at each other

Fuwa Yuzuki: and how you got that indirect kiss

Fuwa Yuzuki: oh PLEASE TELL ME YOU GUYS KISSED

Akabane Karma: we didnt

Maehara Hiroto: bet you wanted to

Akabane Karma is offline

Fuwa Yuzuki: OTP

Meanwhile:

Nagisa lay on his bed, dazed eyes fixedly staring at the ceiling. His hand was pressed against a flaming cheek, still feeling the slight pressure of soft lips that had burned an invisible mark there seconds earlier. Slowly, he closed his eyes and smiled.

Chapter Text

Kimura Masayoshi: Guys what if oxygen is slowly killing us but it just takes 75-100 years to fully work

Sugaya Sousuke: Kimura WTF

Kimura Masayoshi: on the other hand what if everyhting we see is just a hallucination caused by the inhalation of oxygen

Kimura Masayoshi: which explains why everything goes black when you pass out - WHICH IS WHEN YOUR BRAIN DOESNT HAVE ENOUGH OXYGEN

Sugaya Sousuke: Kimura it’s 11:30

Kimura Masayoshi: but what if

Fuwa Yuzuki: you guys go to sleep before 1 am

Fuwa Yuzuki: cute

Sugaya Sousuke: I was trying to sleep but when I get texts my phone lights up like its harnessed the power of the sun so now I’m up

Hara Sumire: What are you doing up Fuwa

Hara Sumire: you shouldnt stay up too late if you want to be alert in class

Fuwa Yuzuki: Oh you know just rewatching Yuri!!! On Ice for the 50th time

Sugaya Sousuke: Fuwa…

Fuwa Yuzuki: Yeah yeah I know I should finish reading up on the Boku No Hero Academia manga

Fuwa Yuzuki: but I WAS BORN TO SHIP VICTUURI (heart eyes emoji)

Kimura Masayoshi: (sweatdrop emoji)

Shiota Nagisa: Yeah I cant sleep either

Nakamura Rio: why’s that Nagisa

Shiota Nagisa: Just have a lot on my mind that’s all

Sugino Tomohito: do you wanna talk about it

Shiota Nagisa: no thanks Sugino, its nothing really

Shiota Nagisa: but thanks for offering (smiley face)

Sugino Tomohito: no problem (smiley face)

Okano Hinata: OMG THEIR BROMANCE IS SO SWEET

Okano Hinata: YALL IM GETTING DIABETES

Hara Sumire: Do I need to ask Chiba and Hayami to snipe you guys with tranquilisers to make you go to bed

Fuwa Yuzuki: They wouldnt do that

Fuwa Yuzuki: They don’t even know where we live, right @Hayami Rinka @Chiba Ryuunosuke 

Hayami Rinka: :)

Chiba Ryuunosuke: Yeah sure, whatever

Fuwa Yuzuki: Uhh guys…

Kimura Masayoshi: Okay but does anyone else get the feeling that those two are like super secret spies or something with how good they are at sniping

Maehara Hiroto: I wouldnt be surprised

Chiba Ryuunosuke: That information is confidential

Hayami Rinka: We could tell you but then we’d have to kill you :)

Fuwa Yuzuki: I get the feeling that she’s not joking

Okajima Taiga: yup

Maehara Hiroto: totally agree with you

Kimura Masayoshi: not gonna argue there

Terasaka Ryouma: EVERYONE

Terasaka Ryouma: GO THE F*** TO SLEEP

Hayami Rinka: Terasaka mind your own business and let us have fun

Terasaka Ryouma: SHUT THE HELL UP

Hayami Rinka: What the f*** did you just f***ing say about me, you little b****? I'll have you know I graduated top of my class in the Navy Seals, and I've been involved in numerous secret raids on Al-Quaeda, and I have over 300 confirmed kills. I am trained in gorilla warfare and I'm the top sniper in the entire US armed forces. You are nothing to me but just another target. I will wipe you the f*** out with precision the likes of which has never been seen before on this Earth, mark my f***ing words. You think you can get away with saying that s*** to me over the Internet? Think again, f***er. As we speak I am contacting my secret network of spies across the USA and your IP is being traced right now so you better prepare for the storm, maggot. The storm that wipes out the pathetic little thing you call your life. You're f***ing dead, kid. I can be anywhere, anytime, and I can kill you in over seven hundred ways, and that's just with my bare hands. Not only am I extensively trained in unarmed combat, but I have access to the entire arsenal of the United States Marine Corps and I will use it to its full extent to wipe your miserable a** off the face of the continent, you little s***. If only you could have known what unholy retribution your little "clever" comment was about to bring down upon you, maybe you would have held your f***ing tongue. But you couldn't, you didn't, and now you're paying the price, you goddamn idiot. I will s*** fury all over you and you will drown in it. You're f***ing dead, kiddo.

Terasaka Ryouma: WHAT THE F***

Okajima Taiga: WHAT THE HELL

Nakamura Rio: YASSSS

Nakamura Rio: SLAY HAYAMI YOU BEAUTIFUL QUEEN

Sugaya Sousuke: So is Terasaka like?

Sugaya Sousuke: dead?

Sugaya Sousuke: or?

Okano Hinata: yeah he super dead

Chiba Ryuunosuke: Nice work Hayami

Hayami Rinka: thank you Chiba

Maehara Hiroto: GUYS I CANT BREATHE THIS IS GOLD

Kimura Masayoshi: so do we like press F now or later when the rest of the class is awake

Sugaya Sousuke: IM SORRY BUT IS NO ONE GONNA COMMENT ON KIMURA’S WEIRD A** TEXTS FROM EALIER

Maehara Hiroto: Nah he has a point

Shiota Nagisa: Yeah I go through a lot of conspiracy theories with Fuwa when we hang out so I’m kinda used to it

Shiota Nagisa: It’s fun hearing them

Fuwa Yuzuki: YES MY CHILD

Hara Sumire: I’ll have you know that Nagisa is actually MY child

Fuwa Yuzuki: excuse me I happen to be his mother okay. I signed the adoption papers when we watched Detective Conan together

Hara Sumire: EXCUSE ME

Hara Sumire: I AM CLASS 3-E’S MUM OKAY AND ANYONE WHO TRIES TO TAKE MY CHILD WILL HAVE TO GO THROUGH ME

Shiota Nagisa: Guys I aready have a mum

Fuwa Yuzuki: SHHHHHH NAGISA

Fuwa Yuzuki: just let us have this

Fuwa Yuzuki: @Hara Sumire alright, i’ll settle for joint custody

Akabane Karma: Alright, listen up you little s**ts.

Akabane Karma: Not you, Nagisa. You’re an angel and we’re thrilled you’re here.

Akabane Karma: My phone has been pinging so much that it looks like its having a seizure

Akabane Karma: If yall don’t shut up I will shoot you

Maehara Hiroto: why not just turn off your phone notifications tho?

Nakamura Rio: I bet he keeps them on just incase he gets a text from Nagisa

Shiota Nagisa: Oh Karma, I’m so sorry

Shiota Nagisa: I didnt realise we were disturbing you

Akabane Karma: nah its okay Nagisa youre alright

Nakamura Rio: haha whipped

Akabane Karma: wait I scrolled up

Akabane Karma: Hayami that was beautiful

Okano Hinata: Now we know what to do when Okajima starts acting up

Okajima Taiga: WHY DO YOU ALL HATE ME

Hayami Rinka: because you’re you

Shiota Nagisa: We don’t hate you Okajima (smiley face)

Shiota Nagisa: I think you’re really cool 

Shiota Nagisa: you’re a really good photographer when you’re not taking pictures of the girls 

Okajima Taiga: THANK YOU NAGISA (crying face) (crying face)

Okajima Taiga: AT LEAST SOMEONE APPRECIATES ME

Nakamura Rio: thats because Nagisa is a smol sweet cinnamon roll who likes everyone

Nakamura Rio: he is literally incapable of being mean

Okajima Taiga: thats true

Shiota Nagisa: HEY

Shiota Nagisa: What’s wrong with being nice anyway

Nakamura Rio: which is why we must protect him

Shiota Nagisa: I dont need you guys to protect me

Nakamura Rio: everyone who would give their lives for Nagisa say aye

Nakamura Rio: aye

Sugino Tomohito: aye

Akabane Karma: aye

Shiota Nagisa: NO

Fuwa Yuzuki: aye

Maehara Hiroto: aye

Okajima Taiga: aye

Okano Hinata: aye

Shiota Nagisa: GUYS STOP

Hara Sumire: aye

Kimura Masayoshi: aye

Sugaya Sousuke: aye

Terasaka Ryouma: aye

Nakamura Rio: hey Nagisa’s cinnamon rolliness has brought Terasaka back from the dead

Shiota Nagisa: NO

Shiota Nagisa: Don’t endanger yourselves because of me - i dont want you to get hurt

Shiota Nagisa: I’m not worth that much

Sugino Tomohito: YES YOU DO 

Akabane Karma: YOU DO AND I WILL KILL ANYONE WHO DARES SAY OTHERWISE

Nakamura Rio: YOU DO SHUT UP AND ACCEPT OUR LOVE

Koro-Sensei: as much as I love you all bonding with each other

Koro-Sensei: I do have to ask you all to go to sleep

Koro-Sensei: It would be hard for you to assassinate me if you aren’t alert during lesson time

Koro-Sensei: not that you would be able to kill me if you were ;)

Maehara Hiroto: YOU WERE HERE THIS WHOLE TIME

Koro-Sensei: Of course I was

Hayami Rinka: Sir I dont know how that text got sent I swear I dropped my phone and that just got messaged by accident 

Hayami Rinka: I’m going to bed

Shiota Nagisa: same here

Kimura Masayoshi: right behind you

Chapter Text

Yoshida Taisei:  HOLY F***

Yoshida Taisei: I read up and WTH HAYAMI

Yoshida Taisei: I dont know whether to laugh or crawl away in fear

Kimura Masayoshi: I say both

Hayami Rinka: (smiling cat emoji)

Hazama Kirara: The ONE time I go to bed on time and I miss THAT

Hazama Kirara: My life is truly a pinata and the Universe is a six year old birthday boy whose parents have announced their divorce

Isogai Yuuma: Hazama are you alright

Hazama Kirara: no

Maehara Hiroto: Hey @Isogai Yuuma I’m outside, let’s go 

Isogai Yuuma: (thumbs up emoji)

Isogai Yuuma: On my way

Okano Hinata: Oh you guys walk to school together

Okano Hinata: how cute

Okajima Taiga: why won’t you walk to school with meeeee Maehara

Maehara Hiroto: Are you Isogai?

Okajima Taiga: *gasp*

Okajima Taiga: rude (angry face emoji)

Maehara Hiroto: Don’t worry dude, you’re still my bro

Okajima Taiga: Bro

Maehara Hiroto: Bro

Okajima Taiga: Bro

Maehara Hiroto: Bro

Okajima Taiga: Bro

Maehara Hiroto: Bro

Okajima Taiga: Bro

Maehara Hiroto: Bro

Okajima Taiga: Bro

Maehara Hiroto: Bro

Okano Hinata: FOR GOD’S SAKE WILL THE TWO OF YOU SHUT UP

Okajima Taiga: But we’re not even talking

Okano Hinata: ONE MORE WORD FROM THE TWO OF YOU AND I WILL KICK YOU GUYS OUT OF THE CHAT

Maehara Hiroto: But you cant ;)

Maehara Hiroto: because you’re not an admin ;)

Okano Hinata: Alright then ;)

Okano Hinata: I ;) will ;) kick ;) you ;) out ;) of ;) this ;) earth ;)

Okajima Taiga: ?

Okano Hinata: Because ;) I ;) Will ;) F***ING ;) KILL ;) YOU ;)

Okano Hinata: ;)

Isogai Yuuma: Okano please it’s too early in the morning for death threats

Isogai Yuuma: and you two stop annoying her

Akabane Karma: It’s never too early for homicide

Akabane Karma: (smiley face emoji)

Isogai Yuuma: (-_-)

Fuwa Yuzuki: Ha Isogai’s such a tired dad 

Isogai Yuuma: ?

Okajima Taiga: #IsogaiIsTheDadFriendConfirmed

Nakamura Rio: Honey, we been knew

Mimura Kouki: If Isogai is the dad friend, then who's the mum friend

Hara Sumire: ….

Mimura Kouki: Never mind

Maehara Hiroto: I always got the feeling that Nagisa is a dad/mum friend

Maehara Hiroto: 1. He always listens to our worries and gives us advice

Maehara Hiroto: 2. He always carries around a first aid kit so that he can patch us up when we get hurt - he’s practically the class medic as well as the class therapist

Okajima Taiga: One time I got a paper cut and he gave me a Spider-Man plaster, an ice pack and a lollipop 

Maehara Hiroto: and 3. He always tries to keep peace and stop fights from breaking out and can calm anyone down when they’re angry

Kimura Masayoshi: You know, I’ve always wanted to know how he’s so good at that

Kimura Masayoshi: cause he doesnt have any younger siblings or cousins so I have no idea how he’s so good at calming people down

Mimura Kouki: Yeah he is really good at it

Kanzaki Yukiko: It’s probably because he’s really good at reading people

Mimura Kouki: true

Sugaya Sousuke: I suppose Nagisa really is a dad/mum friend

Nakamura Rio: but how can Nagisa be a parent friend if he is b a b e y 

Fuwa Yuzuki: yeah and Hara and I have joined custody of him

Hara Sumire: I did not agree to that

Fuwa Yuzuki: Oh hush you can have him on the weekends and alternating holidays

Hara Sumire: EXCUSE ME

Okajima Taiga: yeah he’s so uwu

Hayami Rinka: never say that again

Okano Hinata: yeah that was super weird coming from you

Okajima Taiga: (crying emoji)

Shiota Nagisa: Okajima don’t be upset we dont really think youre weird

Kataoka Megu: yes we do

Shiota Nagisa: Alright well I dont

Shiota Nagisa: sure you can get a bit …. passionate about girls and stuff but you’re also super nice and fun to be around

Okajima Taiga: OML GUYS IM CRYING (crying emoji) (crying emoji) (crying emoji)

Okajima Taiga: NAGISA YOU ANGEL

Nakamura Rio: honestly what did we ever do to deserve you, Nagisa

Okano Hinata: He really is the best of his kind 

Maehara Hiroto: WHAT ABOUT ISOGAI THE IKEMAN

Okano Hinata: I love how you didn’t even argue the fact that Nagisa is better than you

Kataoka Megu: that’s because he knows it’s true

Nakamura Rio: Nah

Maehara Hiroto: HEY (angry face emoji)

Nakamura Rio: He was just preoccupied with defending the honour of his beloved

Maehara Hiroto: SAY WHAT NOW?!

Yada Touka: To be honest, I think that Nagisa and Isogai are both at the same level when it comes to gentlemanliness and cinnamon roll pureness 

Sugaya Sousuke: Yeah, they both are a standard we can never even dream of reaching

Kimura Masayoshi: agreed

Shiota Nagisa: @Isogai Yuuma you know what they’re talking about?

Isogai Yuuma: No idea

Shiota Nagisa: you guys don’t have to make a big deal about what I said

Shiota Nagisa: I was just telling Okajima what I honestly thought

Okajima Taiga: just when I stopped crying you made me cry again

Okajima Taiga: Nagisa I love you

Shiota Nagisa: Aww thanks Okajima I love you too

Maehara Hiroto: *gasp*

Akabane Karma: Okajima….

Akabane Karma: you better hope I don’t find you

Fuwa Yuzuki: OKAJIMA YOU BETTER START RUNNING BOY YOU THINK YOU CAN BLOW HOLES IN MY SHIP

Nakamura Rio: Do you really mean that Nagisa

Shiota Nagisa: Of course I do

Okajima Taiga: HAHA YES

Nakamura Rio: Oh come on 

Nakamura Rio: I thought that if he was going to be with anyone apart from the obvious it would’ve been me

Sugino Tomohito: I’m pretty sure he bats for the other team

Okajima Taiga: He can bat for my team any day he wants ;)

Kayano Kaede: But but Nagisa….

Shiota Nagisa: I love all of my friends/classmates

Okano Hinata: OOOOOHHHHH DAMMMNNN

Nakamura Rio: Oh thank god

Fuwa Yuzuki: Oh that’s a relief

Shiota Nagisa: ?

Shiota Nagisa: What are you guys talking about?

Kayano Kaede: Dont worry about it Nagisa

Fuwa Yuzuki: Also Okajima you’re dead

Akabane Karma: YOU DAMN RIGHT HE IS

Okajima Taiga: what you jealous that I’m gonna steal your man

Maehara Hiroto: OOOHHH HE DEAD

Yoshida Taisei: So dead

Akabane Karma: Okajima, I hope you’re aware that I am currently carrying five weapons on my person, I have Okuda on speed dial and she can create a formula that can dissolve your body so well that not even worms would be able to find it and enough cleaning supplies to make sure that the police would never be able to find a single clue that explains how you mysteriously disappeared

Okajima Taiga: what the hell

Shiota Nagisa: Karma don’t threaten to kill Okajima

Akabane Karma: But he started it

Shiota Nagisa: Karma no violence

Shiota Nagisa: if you threaten him or harm him again I won’t come over to your house today

Akabane Karma: ...

Akabane Karma: fine

Okajima Taiga: THANK YOU 

Akabane Karma: BUT YOURE ON THIN F***ING ICE

Shiota Nagisa: Karma….

Akabane Karma: alright

Akabane Karma: Okajima, I’m sorry for threatening to kill you and destroying your body. I swear I’m not going to hunt you down when we get to class 

Kataoka Megu: Holy s*** he actually got Karma to apologise 

Shiota Nagisa: thank you Karma (smiley face emoji)

Akabane Karma: you’re still coming over right?

Shiota Nagisa: Yes, of course

Akabane Karma: sweet

Maehara Hiroto: I swear Karma is so whipped it’s not even funny anymore

Maehara Hiroto deleted 1 message

Shiota Nagisa: what was that?

Maehara Hiroto: nothing

Okano Hinata: I don’t mean to sound cringey on main but if Nagisa and Isogai straight up assassinated the Prime Minister and Vice Prime Minister of Japan and took their jobs, I would legit cry from happiness

Yada Touka: same

Nakamura Rio: OMG I KNOW RIGHT

Maehara Hiroto: It would truly be a blessing

Shiota Nagisa: Wait WHAT

Isogai Yuuma: I’m sorry what

Akabane Karma: does this mean that we can assassinate Japan’s leaders

Shiota Nagisa: KARMA

Shiota Nagisa: WE CANT DO THAT

Akabane Karma: Course we can (smiley face)

Akabane Karma: were a classroom full of assassins and have a teacher that can move at Mach 20, a teacher that’s a super badass government agent and a teacher that is one of the top assassins in the world that has connections to Lovro

Akabane Karma: and if all else fails, we can have Chiba and Hayami snipe anyone that opposes you

Akabane Karma: you guys are cool with that right

Hayami Rinka: sure

Chiba Ryunosuke: yep

Shiota Nagisa: NO NO NO

Shiota Nagisa: WE ARE NOT KILLING ACTUAL HUMAN BEINGS 

Fuwa Yuzuki: But Nagisa

Fuwa Yuzuki: If you or Isogai become Japan’s leaders you can change the national anthem to the Shingeki No Kyojin (Attack On Titan) OP Shinzo Wo Sasageyo!

Shiota Nagisa: uhhhhh

Shiota Nagisa: I really don’t think that that justifies homicide Fuwa

Kimura Masayoshi: You guys would be better than the current people in power anyway

Shiota Nagisa: Isogai I can get 

Shiota Nagisa: But I’m not really leader potential

Isogai Yuuma: Of course you are Nagisa

Isogai Yuuma: You just need to have more confidence in yourself

Isogai Yuuma: You’re one of the most amazing people I know

Sugino Tomohito: Oh my god guys he’s blushing so hard

Sugino Tomohito: we’re walking towards the mountain together and he legit just stopped in place and turned bright red

Sugino Tomohito: You_Guys_Broke_Him.png

Akabane Karma: wow he can not handle a compliment

Nakamura Rio: Awww

Nakamura Rio: He’s such a blushy little baby

Shiota Nagisa: NAKAMURA

Nakamura Rio: Reminds me of the time he got kissed by B****-Sensei

Shiota Nagisa: I’ve been trying to erase that from my mind actually 

Shiota Nagisa: Thank you for bringing that up again 

Nakamura Rio: you’re welcome Nagisa (smiley face emoji)

Nakamura Rio: but I dont think youre going to forget it anytime soon

Nakamura Rio: they say that your first kiss is the most memorable

Shiota Nagisa: CAN SOMEONE PLEASE CHANGE THE SUBJECT

Kurahashi Hinano: ohh guys I found out a fun fact

Hara Sumire: What is it Kurahashi?

Kurahashi Hinano: did you know that most laughs you hear on TV shows were recorded in the 1950s? That means, technically, you’re most likely hearing dead people laugh :)

Yoshida Taisei: What the hell

Hazama Kirara: that may be a pretty interesting fact for most people but I already hear dead people laughing

Yoshida Taisei: Hey Hazama

Yoshida Taisei: What the F*** does that mean

Hazama Kirara: :)

Muramatsu Takuya: alright then

Chapter Text

(25 unread messages) 

Akabane Karma: Hey there Nagi :) HAPPY BIRTHDAY BLUEBERRY! I can’t believe you are officially older than me. But don’t get your hopes up, just because you’re my elder, doesn’t mean that I will start listening to you. Just to show you how awesome I am, I decided to stay up late so that I can text you exactly at 00:00. But for real, I hope you have an awesome day and I promise to beat up anyone that ruins it for you ;) Nagisa, you are honestly the most amazing person I’ve ever met and you’re seriously like such a sweet and kind and honest and good person and I have no idea how someone as nice and forgiving as you ended up befriending someone as crazy and violent as me. You’re the only person who's never been scared of me and even though you hate violence you still stood by me and never tried to change me and you liked me for me. No one’s ever liked me without expecting me to change and I’ve never felt as comfortable being myself with someone as I have with you. Can’t wait to see you at school today - I got you a present. No I won’t tell you what it is and yes, you’ll definitely love it. See you soon.

Sugino Tomohito: Happy Birthday Nagisa! Hope that you have fun today! I just want to tell you that you are the best best friend that I could ever ask for and I am truly grateful for everything that you have done for me. When I first got kicked down to 3-E and was forced to leave the baseball club, I thought that it was all over but you came along and was the first person to actually sit down and listen to me and you offered to practice baseball with me and honestly, that really made my day. Dude, you are like this amazing blue ball of kindness and like seriously you are brilliant but you don’t nearly give yourself enough credit. I don’t know where you get your low self esteem from or what it is that makes you think that you are worth so little but I promise to remind you that you are cared for every single day until your next birthday and for the rest of your life. Okay, that probably sounded super weird but it’s early and my brain is like 60% baseball memes at this point. At first I hated losing my baseball friends and getting sent to this abandoned building on top of a death mountain but meeting you has made me realise that our crazy assassination classroom™ is the best thing that’s ever happened to me. From the day I’ve met you, you’ve been nothing but loyal and caring. You are the person I can talk and rant to and you’ll never judge me and you always know how to make you smile. And honestly, you are worth 1000 baseball teams. Don’t let your mother get you down. See you in class! Oh, BTW, my little brother says Hi.

Kayano Kaede: HIIIIII NAGISA! HOPE YOU HAVE A HAPPY BIRTHDAY FROM THE BOTTOM OF MY HEART! I got you a gift and I hope you like it and no it’s not pudding but you will be getting some cake from that cafe we visited over the weekend. It’s not easy being the new girl and ever since I’ve joined the class, you’ve been nothing but an awesome best friend and you have always been by my side since the day we decided to have matching hairstyles (which might I say looks so much better on you than it does on me - UNFAIR!) I hope the rest of the year is filled with pudding and happiness and sweets and smiles and everything else you love 

Nakamura Rio: Happy birthday to our resident blueberry cinnamon roll! Have a wonderful day ‘Gisa. I’m sure you will when you see what I have in store for you ;). You are seriously the most mature, innocent, pure little bean I have ever met - and definitely the most fun person to play pranks on! Dont worry, as the birthday boy, you shall spend 24 hours completely prank free. Yes, yes I know, I’m the best classmate ever. Dont need to tell me something I already know, sweetie. See you later, my fellow English lover!

Maehara Hiroto: Yo, dude, Happy Birthday! Hope you have fun and enjoy what we’ve got in store for you (no hints!). Like seriously you are legit the most awesome person ever cause you’re so sweet and innocent and can turn into this super awesome secret badass whenever you want to. Youre like the class therapist/medic/person we can always rely on and you never complain when we drive you crazy (cause I know that we do). I’m super proud of you man. Never change Nagisa. See you at school. (BTW - We still up for karaoke next week?)

Isogai Yuuma: Happy birthday Nagisa! Hope you have a wonderful day! I can’t wait to see you in class later. When my siblings found out that it was your birthday, they insisted that they make you a card.You are an irreplaceable member of our class and I’m so happy that you are part of it. Seriously, if it wasn’t for you and your ability to calm people down and talk people out of doing whatever crazy idea they came up with, I’m pretty sure I would’ve lost my mind. You’re always smiling and always participate in class without complaining and you always see the best in everyone. Keep on doing what you do Nagisa, the world could use more people like you. ( Oh and come to the cafe later, I got an iced bun on the house for you)

Fuwa Yuzuki: AAAAAHHHHH HAPPY BIRTHDAY NAGISA! CONGRATULATIONS ON SUCCESSFULLY SURVIVING THIS LONG ON EARTH! OOHH IM SUPER EXCITED FOR YOU TO SEE WHAT I’VE GOT YOU! Thank you for always going along with and listening to my crazy anime/manga rants even when you have no idea whats going on. It’s so much fun hanging out with you cause youre chill and youre always up for anything and apart from Takabayshi you’re the person in the class that get my references the most. Youre an amazing main protagonist and you deserve all of the screentime and lines you get - heck even your own spin-off show. For someone who loves heroes so much, youre doing an amazing job of being one yourself. Youre the best Watson a Sherlock like me could ever ask for and a really good friend for this manga obsessed Otaku! Love you and see you later!

Kataoka Megu: Happy Birthday Nagisa. I hope that you enjoy the rest of the day. As someone whose job is to watch over our … interesting class, having you around makes everyone else bearable. I’m sure that if you aren’t here to keep the peace I would’ve murdered Okajima months ago. You have always been really respectful and kind and I appreciate having someone as hard-working and loyal as you in my class. I always enjoy having our talks about equal rights and you have always been like a little brother to me (honestly, I prefer you over my actual older brother). See you later and please continue to stay the way you are.

Okano Hinata: Hey there Nagisa. Happy Birthday! How’s it going, little dude! Hope you enjoy yourself and have lots of fun today. Thank you for being one of the only boys that I can actually stand. You are such an amazing person to have in the class and you’re amazing at being someone that we can all come to when we’re upset. Plus you let us brush your amazing godly hair (seriously I’m jealous at how nice it is). If any main campus kids try to ruin this special day - come to me and I’ll sort them right out :)

Kurahashi Hinano: HAPPY BIRTHDAY NAGISA! I HOPE YOU HAVE LOTS AND LOTS AND LOTS OF FUN TODAY AND EVERY SINGLE DAY OF YOUR LIFE! CAN’T WAIT TO SEE YOU SO THAT I CAN GIVE YOU YOUR PRESENT IN PERSON AND THE BIGGEST BIRTHDAY HUG EVER! YOU ARE AN AMAZING PERSON AND I (AND EVERYONE ELSE) LOVE YOU SOO MUCH OKAY I HAVE TO GO NOW BUT BYEEEE 

Kimura Masayoshi: Hey Nagisa! Happy Birthday! Can’t wait to see you at school!
Mimura Kouki: Happy Birthday Nagisa :) wish you the best :)

Yada Touka: Happy Birthday Nagisa! I hope you have a fun-filled day! You are a really sweet and nice person and I enjoy hanging around with you - especially when you join us girls on our girl trips to the mall. You’re like a little brother to me and I always feel comfortable when I’m with you. Love you and hope you have a nice day <3

Takabayashi Koutarou: Happy Birthday Nagisa. I hope that you enjoy yourself.

Hayami Rinka: Happy Birthday Nagisa

Okajima Taiga: Happy Birthday Nagisa. You are such an incredible person to have in the class. And thank you for always saving me from the girls when they get mad at me. Hope you have fun. I was going to give you some really cool magazines but when the girls figured it out they slapped me and said that they’d tie me up in the middle of the mountain and leave me there if I did so I’m just gonna give you something else that I made (with Sugaya’s help). I’ll show you it at school - I hope you like it.

Kanzaki Yukiko: Happy Birthday Nagisa. I hope you have a nice day and thank you for being such a good and reliable friend. See you at school.

Yoshida Taisei: Happy Birthday Nagisa! I’m so sorry for the grenade incident earlier and I am so happy Koro-Sensei saved you. Also like you are one tough guy, you know that right? Cause what happened with Takaoka, man you couldve beaten any of us up with your eyes closed any time. Stay awesome dude. See you at the mountain

Hara Sumire: Happy Birthday Nagisa. I’ve made some sushi just for you. I hope you like it. As your official unofficial mother, I hope you have fun today and I can’t wait to see you later. 

Sugaya Sosuke: Happy Birthday Nagisa. Thank you for being around and seeing the good in all of us even when we don’t see it ourselves. You always know how to inspire us and you are going to be an awesome grown up when you’re older. You always appreciate everyone and you know exactly how to pick us up when we’re down. I hope you like your present (you’ll get it later)

Okuda Manami: Happy Birthday Nagisa! I hope you have a wonderful day today. I just want to say thank you for being my friend and always encouraging me and helping me. You always know how to cheer me up and include me. See you at school.

Chiba Ryuunosuke: Happy Birthday Nagisa

Hazama Kirara: Happy Birthday fellow literature lover. I really enjoy talking about gothic literature with you - your analysis of themes and context is always very insightful and interesting and I enjoy spending time with you. If you ever need to escape, you can always come to me. PS - my offer to curse your mother is still up.

Muramatsu Takuya: Happy Birthday Nagisa. Hope you have fun. I made you some ramen (don’t worry its not my dad’s recipe so you’ll be good)

Terasaka Ryouma: Sup Shiota, Happy Birthday. I just want to say that I’m really sorry for being an a**hole and treating you like a jerk - especially forcing you to wear that grenade at the beginning of the year. You’re really good at assassination and you’ve got some serious moves. I dont really know what to say but you can always hang out with my gang whenever you want.

Chapter Text

Nagisa >> Sugino

Nagisa: Hey Sugino

Nagisa: are you free?

Sugino: Sure

Sugino: What’s up?

Sugino: Is something wrong?

Nagisa: I just

Nagisa: I don’t know

Nagisa: I’m so confused

Sugino: ?

Nagisa: about Karma

Sugino: did he do something?

Nagisa: NO

Nagisa: no he didn’t do anything

Nagisa: I think I might like him

Nagisa: like

Nagisa: like like him

Nagisa: you know

Sugino: you think you might consider him as more than a friend

Nagisa: yeah

Nagisa: I think

Nagisa: I don’t know if I do or not though

Sugino: alright

Sugino: why don’t you try to explain what you feel

Nagisa: ?

Sugino: when youre around him what do you think

Nagisa: that he’s amazing

Nagisa: that he’s smart and brilliant and incredible 

Nagisa: but I admire all of my friends

Nagisa: I think that every one of them is amazing

Sugino: but do you think that Karma’s amazing is different to the amazing that you think say Isogai is

Nagisa: yeah

Nagisa: everyone is different so that makes sense

Nagisa: But with him I feel like I’m on air

Nagisa: like everything makes sense

Nagisa: when he talks to me I want him to keep on talking because every word he says just fills me with happiness 

Nagisa: when he holds my hand I feel all warm and tingly like I’ve been electrocuted 

Nagisa: But a good electrocuted

Nagisa: and when he smiles at me my heart races and my stomach feels like it’s going to burst 

Nagisa: do you

Nagisa: do you think I have a crush?

Sugino: dude you definitely have a crush

Nagisa: oh no

Sugino: that’s not a bad thing

Nagisa: YES IT IS

Nagisa: It could ruin everything 

Nagisa: he’ll think I’m weird and stop hanging out with me

Nagisa: or he’ll feel sorry for me and start pitying me

Sugino: Nagisa you’ve got to tell him I’m sure he feels the same

Nagisa: I really don’t think so

Sugino: yes he does

Sugino: dude I’ve seen the way he looks at you when he thinks you’re not watching 

Sugino: I didn’t even know that he’s capable of looking like that

Sugino: he even flirts with you like all the time

Nagisa: no way

Nagisa: he doesn’t 

Sugino: man he’s always making you blush and goes out of his way to touch you

Nagisa: that’s just how he is

Nagisa: he teases everyone 

Sugino: yeah but he only hugs you

Nagisa: we’re close friends it’s normal for friends to hug

Sugino: he lets you do things that would normally make him threaten other people if they did it

Nagisa: like I said we’re close

Nagisa: and he has some trust issues

Nagisa: But 

Sugino: yes?

Nagisa: he did do something that made me wonder

Sugino: which was?

Nagisa: well you know that day the class spied on us at the mall

Sugino: sorry about that BTW it was Nakamura’s idea

Nagisa: oh I’m cool with it

Nagisa: you all should have just told me that you wanted to join us

Sugino: that’s not

Sugino: anyway, you were saying

Nagisa: well after that Karma didn’t want to stay at the mall any longer so we went to his place to hang out

Nagisa: when it was getting late he walked me home and then he

Nagisa: he gave me a kiss 

Nagisa: on the cheek

Sugino: HOLY S***

Sugino: HE KISSED YOU

Nagisa: on the cheek

Sugino: STILL

Sugino: THAT MEANS HE FEELS THE SAME DUMMY

Sugino: WHAT DID YOU DO AFTER

Nagisa: I didn’t know how to handle it so I opened the door and ran inside

Nagisa: I didn’t know what to think so I’ve just been ignoring it

Nagisa: he didn’t bring it up either so maybe he didn’t think much of it

Sugino: dude that was two days ago

Sugino: you haven’t said anything out it since

Nagisa: I don’t know what to say

Nagisa: I don’t want to make things weird between us

Nagisa: everything could change for the worse and I don’t want to lose him

Sugino: But it could change for the better

Sugino: did you like it when he kissed you

Nagisa: I did

Sugino: would you want him to kiss you again

Nagisa: I would

Sugino: then tell him that

Nagisa: But I cant 

Nagisa: I just don’t know how

Sugino: you could tell him that

Sugino: that you don’t know what to say

Sugino: listen Nagisa, you’re my best friend and all I ever want for you is for you to be happy

Sugino: if anyone deserves happiness it’s you

Sugino: you always help others and put everyone else first before yourself but you deserve to think about what you want as well

Sugino: if you want to be with Karma in a romantic sense and if being his boyfriend is what would make you happy then go for it dude

Sugino: if you’re fine with being friends then don’t say anything but if you’re not then you’re only going to get hurt by not confessing and I don’t like seeing you hurt 

Sugino: HE was the one that initiated it so he definitely knew what he was doing

Sugino: Listen I dont think anyone can understand what goes on in his head but if there’s one thing about him thats obvious its obvious that he really cares about you

Nagisa: so you definitely think I should say something

Sugino: yes

Nagisa: even when this is all new to me and I don’t even understand what’s going on myself

Sugino: yes

Sugino: he wont reject you I promise

Nagisa: all right I’ll text him and ask to meet up with him

Sugino: good luck dude

Sugino: you wont regret it

Nagisa: thank you

Nagisa: you’re the best friend ever

Sugino: no problem

Chapter Text

Yoshida Taisei:  CAN SOMEONE PLEASE GET FUWA TO QUIT YELLING SHE’S GIVING ME A HEADACHE

Fuwa Yuzuki: DON’T YOU DARE SAY ANYTHING CITY BOY DO NOT RUIN THIS MOMENT I CANT BELIEVE THAT MY OTP IS NOW CANON AAAAAHAHHAHHH

Fuwa Yuzuki: KARMA NAGISA THANK YOU SO MUCH MY CROPS ARE WATERED MY SKIN IS CLEARED MY HOTEL IS TRIVAGO GOD BLESS EVERYONE

Shiota Nagisa: uuuhh thank you Fuwa

Shiota Nagisa: honestly though I didn’t really do anything

Shiota Nagisa: it was Karma that announced that we are dating

Akabane Karma: you are very welcome Fuwa (smirk face)

Fuwa Yuzuki: YEAH BUT THE TWO OF YOU CAME INTO CLASS WHILST HOLDING HANDS LLIKE ASDFGHJKLLOKIUYTREDCFVGBHJUYHTRGFRD

Nakamura Rio: alright but can you blame the girl

Nakamura Rio: all of us have been waiting for the day the two of you would stop dancing around each other

Shiota Nagisa: I just can’t believe that the entire class was betting on us

Shiota Nagisa: Even Koro-Sensei and B****-Sensei

Nakamura Rio: Yep! (smiley face)

Nakamura Rio: And mama just got 4000 yen richer

Mimura Kouki: don’t remind me

Maehara Hiroto: yeah, couldn't the two of you have declared your undying love for each other a month earlier or something

Shiota Nagisa: uhh sorry?

Akabane Karma: You know what I find even more unbelievable?

Akabane Karma: the fact that the two of you had party decorations to celebrate us getting together hidden in the back closet

Kurahashi Hinano: Oh we had those for weeks

Yada Touka: We could tell that you two liked each other so we were saving them for when you would finally get a clue

Shiota Nagisa: oh yeah, Sugaya, what’s with the banner that says ‘Congratulations Karma and Nagisa For Getting Your Heads Out Of Your A**es’?

Akabane Karma: I think it’s tasteful

Akabane Karma: the red and blue party blowers and party hats were a surprise though

Okajima Taiga: just saying that someone blew a party popper in my eye and it still stings 

Koro-Sensei: Alright class (smiley face)

Koro-Sensei: I’m aware that this is very new and exciting news and that we are all very happy for Karma and Nagisa

Koro-Sensei: However, I must ask that all of you please put down your phones so that we can start the lesson

Nakamura Rio: uuugggghhh fine

Nakamura Rio: @Akabane Karma @Shiota Nagisa we’ll talk wedding plans later

Nakamura Rio: As long as I’m Maid Of Honour, I’m cool

One (1) day of learning later…

Nakamura >>> Partner In Crime

Nakamura: Hey Karma

Partner In Crime: Yeah

Nakamura: What are you doing after school?

Partner In Crime: Nagisa and I are going to walk to my house together

Partner In Crime: Why?

Nakamura: Cool cool cool

Nakamura: Just before you go, stay behind for a bit

Partner In Crime: Why? (suspicious face)

Nakamura: Oh you know

Nakamura: Now that you are dating the blueberry cinnamon roll, the class have a few words for you

Nakamura: And we’d very much like for you to hear them

Partner In Crime: …

Partner In Crime: So you're giving me the shovel talk

Nakamura Rio: Yep!

Partner In Crime: Alright then…

Partner In Crime: But how are you going to distract Nagisa

Partner In Crime: Oh I see

Partner In Crime: Getting Koro-Sensei to talk to him about books 

Partner In Crime: Very clever

One (1) shovel talk later…

Group Chat: KOOL KIDZ SQUAD

Fuwa Yuzuki: Hey Nagisa, Sugino, I just found out that I have to go visit my cousin at the hospital tomorrow so can we reschedule our hang out for the day after

Sugino Tomohito: sure thing (thumbs up)

Shiota Nagisa: sure, no problem (smiley face)

Shiota Nagisa: are they alright, though?

Fuwa Yuzuki: Yeah

Fuwa Yuzuki: He’s just getting his appendix removed so he’s staying overnight

Muramatsu Takuya: I’ve had appendicitis once it was not pretty

Muramatsu Takuya: but then my parents let me laze around and have ice cream afterwards so I was cool

Yoshida Taisei: cool

Kayano Kaede: What were Nagisa and Sugino gonna do with you Fuwa?

Sugino Tomohito: Oh we were gonna watch this baseball anime called ‘Ace Of Diamonds’

Sugino Tomohito: I read a few chapters of the manga and it looks good

Shiota Nagisa: I haven’t read it but it looked interesting plus they invited me so I joined in

Fuwa Yuzuki: I hope your mum would be alright with the change in plans

Shiota Nagisa: she’ll need some convincing but it’ll be fine

Shiota Nagisa: She lets me go to Karma’s because she can’t stop him from inviting me 

Akabane Karma: I’d like to see her try

Shiota Nagisa: but other times she gets a bit upset so I need to really space out whenever I chose to hang out with others

Shiota Nagisa: it’s alright really, I just do more chores to keep her happy

Kataoka Megu: I see

Kimura Masayoshi: Good to know

Mimura Kouki: Anyone know how to do question five for the maths homework

Okano Hinata: yeah wait a sec I’ll show you my working out

Akabane Karma: The answer’s 42

Shiota Nagisa: KARMA

Isogai Yuuma: KARMA

Kataoka Megu: KARMA

Akabane Karma: What, I’m just helping a classmate out

Koro-Sensei: You can’t just give the answers to people

Akabane Karma: Why 

Koro-Sensei: Because they need to understand the question

Akabane Karma: Why

Koro-Sensei: So that they can answer similar questions

Akabane Karma: Why

Koro-Sensei: SO THAT THEY CAN GET HIGH MARKS AND GOOD GRADES

Akabane Karma: ….

Akabane Karma: Why

Koro-Sensei: BECAUSE

Shiota Nagisa: Don’t worry Sir I’ll handle this

Shiota Nagisa: Karma, if you don’t stop saying ‘why’ I’m banning cuddle time for today

Okajima Taiga: Oooh DAMN

Akabane Karma: NAGISA WHYYYY! 

Okano Hinata: Nagisa really went there huh?

Maehara Hiroto: yep he’s pulling out the big guns

Kimura Masayoshi: He truly is a killer

Nakamura Rio: haha YES NAGISA SLAY 

Nakamura Rio: *wipes tear* I’m so proud

Kayano Kaede: Oh Karma’s definitely gonna stop now

Kayano Kaede: No one wants to be denied cuddle time with Nagisa

Kayano Kaede: It really is a top tier experience 

Sugino Tomohito: #CanConfirm

Akabane Karma: Alright I’ll stop

Shiota Nagisa: thank you Karma <3 (blushy smiley face)

Akabane Karma: You’re welcome, Nagisa

Fuwa Yuzuki: OMG YALL NAGISA SENT A HEART EMOJI

Nakamura Rio: Oh my heart I cant even

Okano Hinata: Shiota Nagisa: The Karma Whisperer

Maehara Hiroto: Coming soon to cinemas near you

Nakamura Rio: Karma you lucky lucky man

Isogai Yuuma: Hey guys

Maehara Hiroto: hey Isogai what are you upto 

Isogai Yuuma: I’m just at work

Okano Hinata: Oooh is Maehara looking for a mind at work

Nakamura Rio: AYE

Nakamura Rio: WORK WORK

Maehara Hiroto: ANGELICAAA

Kurahashi Hinano: WORK WORK

Nagisa Shiota: ELIZA

Shiota Nagisa: Nakamura why did you text me to send that

Okano Hinata: WORK WORK

Okajima Taiga: And Peggy

Mimura Kouki: what are you guys doing

Yada Touka: Oh, honey ^-^

Nakamura Rio: WHAT YOU WAITIN FOORRR

Okano Hinata: WELCOME TO MY CANDY STOOOORRRREEE

Kayano Kaede: TIME FOR YOU TO PROVE YOU’RE NOT A LOSER ANYMOOORREEE

Yada Touka: AND STEP INTO MY CANDY STORE

Terasaka Ryuoma: Why are all of you singing English broadway musicals

Fuwa Yuzuki: Because the author doesnt know any Japanese broadway musicals

Takebayashi Koutarou: what 

Fuwa Yuzuki: what

Muramatsu Takuya: At least they aren’t singing Disney songs this time

Kurahashi Hinano: Speaking of Disney songs look what I found

Kurahashi Hinano: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xBCGVqyWrSQ

Sugaya Sousuke: WHAT THE HELL

Terasaka Ryouma: THE F*** IS THAT

Nakamura Rio: OH MY GOD ITS SOO BEAUTIFUL

Okano Hinata: GUYS IM CRYING IM SOO TOUCHED RIGHT NOW

Okajima Taiga: I can feel it calling me

Maehara Hiroto: It’s speaking to me

Mimura Kouki: It’s making me want to rethink my whole career

Hazama Kirara: It’s a majestic, graceful dance that touches on more hidden parts of the human psyche. The fish head symbolizes nature, and the human legs moving the body of the fish shows human’s perceived mastery of nature. However the fish sings to a decidedly human song with its own unique voice, showing that nature still permeates and has meaning in our lives. This dance is a fitting representation of humankind’s complicated relationship with the natural world, and as such is a masterpiece. (I got this from a comment from the video)

Nakamura Rio: I vote that we all do this for the play thing 

Nakamura Rio: I’m sure that the main campus would love it

Maehara Hiroto: I second that

Fuwa Yuzuki: Aww but I really wanted to do a recreation of the Death Note Musical (Yes, this is a thing and yes you should listen to the soundtrack because it is a BOP)

Shiota Nagisa: Well no one cares what the f*** you think you otaku

Fuwa Yuzuki: WHAT

Sugino Tomohito: NAGISA

Kayano Kaede: NAGISA WHAT ON EARTH

Akabane Karma: WHAT NO THAT ISN’T ME IM NAGISA KARMA STOLE MY PHONE

Hara Sumire: Oh phew

Maehara Hiroto: For a second there I thought that Nagisa got corrupted

Nakamura Rio: Yeah, I thought that our baby was tainted

Akabane Karma: Nakamura, I’m older than you

Akabane Karma: In fact I’m older than like half the class and KARMA GIVE ME BACK MY PHONE

Shiota Nagisa: Hi I’m Nagisa and I’m so small that once I got trapped when I tried to get into Karma’s house by climbing through a window

Akabane Karma: KARMA

Akabane Karma: YOU PROMISED THAT YOU WOULDN’T MENTION THAT

Nakamura Rio: Pics or it didn’t happen

Shiota Nagisa: No Nagi, I promised that I wouldnt show anyone the pictures

Nakamura Rio: Awww

Shiota Nagisa: I’ve got to say, it made a lovely view

Akabane Karma: KARMA!!!

Akabane Karma: Well I can do that too

Akabane Karma: Hi I’m Karma and I’m mean

Nakamura Rio: That’s it?

Kayano Kaede: He tried?

Okano Hinata: Oh sweetie

Shiota Nagisa: Yes I got my phone back

Shiota Nagisa: So as I was saying I’m older than Yada, Yoshida, Sugino, Muramatsu, Kurahashi, Sugaya, Okuda, Kayano, Maehara, Isogai and Karma so I’m not really the class baby

Nakamura Rio: yes you are

Fuwa Yuzuki: Yes you are just dont question it

Akabane Karma: Hey Nagisa quit cheating

Shiota Nagisa: Karma, we’re playing chess how can I cheat

Kataoka Megu: You know how to play chess, Nagisa

Shiota Nagisa: I used to play it with my grandpa when I was younger

Akabane Karma: THIS IS THE FOURTH TIME IN A ROW YOU’VE WON HOW ARE YOU DOING THIS

Shiota Nagisa: Maybe you’re just not as good as you thought

Nakamura Rio: oof

Akabane Karma: oh really

Shiota Nagisa: uh hu

Akabane Karma: Alright you asked for it

Shiota Nagisa: Waitguyshelpasxdfrgtthyjufndfgvzsdcvfgbhnjyuki7tu

Sugino Tomohito: NAGISA

Isogai Yuuma: NAGISA 

Kayano Kaede: NAGISA ANSWER US

Hara Sumire: KARMA WHAT THE HELL DID YOU DO TO MY SON

Fuwa Yuzuki: KARMA WHAT ARE YOU DOING TO MY SON

Mimura Kouki: KARMA OH MY GOD WHATS GOING ON

Okano Hinata: NAGISA ANSWER US

Maehara Hiroto: HOLY S*** GUYS I THINK KARMA KILLED HIM

Akabane Karma: guys don’t worry he’s fine

Yuzuki Fuwa: you have three seconds to explain yourself before I find you and make Chiba and Hayami shoot you

Akabane Karma: he’s just passed out 

Kataoka Megu: WHAT

Hara Sumire: WHAT DID YOU DO TO HIM

Akabane Karma: I kissed him and he passed out

Kataoka Megu: Let me get this straight

Kataoka Megu: You forcefully kissed your classmate with enough force for him to lose consciousness

Akabane Karma: I was just making out with my boyfriend

Akabane Karma: He’ll be fine

Okajima Taiga: Damn

Sugino Tomohito: Did you really have to make my best friend pass out

Akabane Karma: Hey have you met the guy

Akabane Karma: How can anyone look at the beautiful creature known as Shiota Nagisa and not want to suffocate him with love and kiss him breathless

Okajima Taiga: He is pretty cute

Akabane Karma: I swear Okajima one more word and you’re done

Terasaka Ryouma: Yall make me wanna die

Akabane Karma: Then go die

Akabane Karma: Literally go die what’s stopping you

Maehara Hiroto: Nagisa

Kimura Masayoshi: Yeah Karma, if Terasaka dies then Nagisa will be sad 

Akabane Karma: …

Akabane Karma: I swear Terasaka you better not die if you die I’ll make sure to resurrect you so that you can spend you can spend your entire second life being my torture technique guinea pig

Sugaya Sousuke: I don’t even know what this class is anymore

Chapter Text

Shiota Nagisa: Hey guys

Shiota Nagisa: I need advice

Fuwa Yuzuki: Look no further, young grasshopper

Fuwa Yuzuki: I am here to offer you my wisdom

Kayano Kaede: What is it Nagisa?

Nakamura Rio: Yeah, Nagisa, spill the tea

Shiota Nagisa: My boyfriend is too tall for me to kiss him on the lips. What should I do?

Okano Hinata: Punch him in the stomach and when he doubles over in pain, kiss him

Kayano Kaede: Kick him in the shins

Sugino Tomohito: Dump him

Akabane Karma: You could just ask me to lean down

Hazama Kirara: Nah, I’m with Sugino

Akabane Karma: I thought you guys wanted us to be together

Kayano Kaede: That was before you made his life difficult by being too tall

Akabane Karma: I can’t control my height

Kayano Kaede: Suffer 

Nakamura Rio added Fuwa Yuzuki, Okano Hinata and 22 others to ‘Pining Idiots 2.0’

Nakamura Rio: I’m sure that you’re all aware why I gathered you here today

Shiota Nagisa: No?

Sugino Tomohito: Yeah, you just added us to another group chat for no reason

Okano Hinata: Wait

Okano Hinata: Nakamura is this what I think this is

Fuwa Yuzuki: OOOHHH

Fuwa Yuzuki: I smell plot progression

Chiba Ryuunosuke: What are we doing here?

Hayami Rinka: You’re interrupting our date

Hara Sumire: You guys are on a date

Hara Sumire: That’s so sweet (smiley face)

Chiba Ryuunosuke: Thanks 

Chiba Ryyunosuke: We’re watching trick shot fails and cute cat videos

Hayami Rinka: The cats are very adorable

Muramatsu Takuya: That is literally the cutest thing ever

Sugaya Sousuke: What’s going on?

Nakamura Rio: I’M GLAD YOU ASKED YOU AMAZING ARTIST

Nakamura Rio: We are here to 

Nakamura Rio: Drumroll please

Fuwa Yuzuki: Drumroll.mp3

Nakamura Rio: Thank you, Fuwa

Nakamura Rio: SET UP OUR RESIDENT CLASS REP WITH THE PLAYBOY

Muramatsu Takuya: You want to push Maehara together with Kataoka?

Kataoka Megu: WHAT

Kataoka Megu: NO WAY IN HELL

Nakamura Rio: WHAT NO

Nakamura Rio: I’m talking about Isogai

Muramatsu Takuya: Oh yeah, that makes more sense

Okano Hinata: YES

Okano Hinata: I’VE BEEN WAITING FOR THIS MOMENT

Fuwa Yuzuki: You and me both sister

Fuwa Yuzuki: Maeiso is literally everything

Yoshida Taisei: I thought you were team Karmagisa?

Shiota Nagisa: What?

Akabane Karma: Team what now?

Fuwa Yuzuki: I mean yeah, obviously Karmagisa is my OTP

Shiota Nagisa: Fuwa what are you talking about?

Fuwa Yuzuki: But Maeiso is my OTP as well

Shiota Nagisa: Am I the only one here confused?

Sugino Tomohito: Nope

Kimura Masayoshi: But doesn’t the O in OTP mean one

Fuwa Yuzuki: HAHAHAHAHHAHAHA

Fuwa Yuzuki: CHILD

Fuwa Yuzuki: AS IF ANYONE CAN EVER HAVE ONLY ONE SHIP

Fuwa Yuzuki: Especially in the Assassination Classroom fandom

Shiota Nagisa: The what fandom?

Shiota Nagisa: I’m so confused

Hara Sumire: You’re not the only one

Akabane Karma: Aww Nagi 

Akabane Karma: Does your head hurt?

Akabane Karma: Do you want me to kiss it better ;)

Shiota Nagisa: uhhh

Terasaka Ryouma: Can yall not flirt in the group chat

Okajima Taiga: Yeah Karma

Okajima Taiga: Slide into his DMs like the rest of us

Hara Sumire: WHAT

Fuwa Yuzuki: SAY WHAT NOW

Akabane Karma: Okajima you have three seconds to explain yourself (knife emoji) (knife emoji) (knife emoji) :)

Okano Hinata: @Shiota Nagisa does Okajima send you weird messages

Shiota Nagisa: What no

Shiota Nagisa: Karma stop sending Okajima threatening messages

Akabane Karma: But Nagi (sad face)

Shiota Nagisa: Karma…

Akabane Karma: Fine

Shiota Nagisa: Nakamura, what do you mean about getting Maehara and Isogai together

Nakamura Rio: I mean that we should help our classmates get together

Shiota Nagisa: I mean I get that

Shiota Nagisa: It’s just…

Shiota Nagisa: Should we do it?

Shiota Nagisa: They might not appreciate it

Nakamura Rio: Sure they will

Nakamura Rio: So guys

Nakamura Rio: Any ideas on how we could get them together?

Fuwa Yuzuki: We could do the drunken confession route

Mimura Kouki: WHAT

Fuwa Yuzuki: You know

Fuwa Yuzuki: Spike both of their drinks with alcohol and let their undying love for each other handle the rest

Mimura Kouki: WE’RE UNDERAGED

Kimura Masayoshi: I’m pretty sure that that’s illegal Fuwa

Fuwa Yuzuki: The end justifies the means, Kimura, the end justifies the means 

Okano Hinata: I vote that we shove the two of them in a broom closet, lock them in and don’t let them out until they confess

Nakamura Rio: That sounds promising

Fuwa Yuzuki: Yeah, I can get behind that

Sugaya Sousuke: SERIOUSLY GUYS

Yoshida Taisei: There’s no way we could get away with that

Fuwa Yuzuki: You guys are so uncreative

Shiota Nagisa: Uh Fuwa

Fuwa Yuzuki: Not you, you adorable little fluff ball of blueberry cotton candy sweetness

Shiota Nagisa: ???

Kayano Kaede: Don’t question it

Shiota Nagisa: It’s just that they are the best pair up in assassination class

Akabane Karma: Excuse you Nagisa

Akabane Karma: THEY ARE NOT THE BEST PAIR WE ARE

Terasaka Ryouma: Oh my god

Sugino Tomohito: You guys are seriously gonna do this, aren’t you

Akabane Karma: Well at least their ideas are better than stalking me and Nagisa in a mall

Shiota Nagisa: I normally don’t approve of meddling with our classmates’ lives but since you guys are stuck on this and I can tell that those two like each other I suppose I can’t stop you

Kurahashi Hinano: Yeah, that's the spirit Nagisa

Yada Touka: So got any ideas. Since you’re so good at reading people you might know the best way of getting through to them

Shiota Nagisa: Well there is a way to make people fall in love

Kayano Kaede: REALLY

Nakamura Rio: Say what now

Shiota Nagisa: Well I read about it in a psychology book

Shiota Nagisa: basically this psychologist called Arthur Aaron made a bunch of people pair up ask each other these specific questions whilst staring into each other’s eyes and then they continued to stare into each other’s eyes for about 4 minutes straight

Kimura Masayoshi: Did it work

Shiota Nagisa: Yep, they all came out of the study with positive feelings for the stranger that they just met

Shiota Nagisa: One couple even got married

Okajima Taiga: Wow

Shiota Nagisa: But I didn’t think it’s going to work on them 

Okano Hinata: Right

Okano Hinata: So locking them in the cupboard it is

Kimura Masayoshi: But how are you going to pull it off

Okano Hinata: Don’t worry ;)

Mimura Kouki: That looks ominous

Nakamura Rio: Okuda, any chance you have some of that chloroform on you (smirk face)

Okuda Manami: Umm, I mean I never leave home without some

Okuda Manami: but

Kataoka Megu: Nakamura, you are not drugging your classmates

Nakamura Rio: Aww 

Nakamura Rio: Well, looks like we’re doing this the harder way

Nakamura Rio: Nagisa, can you sneak up on them and do your assassin stuff

Shiota Nagisa: As in???

Nakamura Rio: IDK 

Nakamura Rio: Stun them

Nakamura Rio: Find their pressure points to knock them out 

Nakamura Rio: Whatever rocks your boat

Shiota Nagisa: I’M NOT DOING THAT

Sugino Tomohito: You can’t use Nagisa as a weapon

Kataoka Megu: Nakamura

Nakamura Rio: Fine, fine

Okano Hinata: Don’t worry, girl, I got you

Okano Hinata: My work here is done

Fuwa Yuzuki: You mean…

Okano Hinata: Yep

Okano Hinata: They were making out when I unlocked the door 

Okano Hinata: Took_Em_Long_Enough.png

Fuwa Yuzuki: AHHHHHHHHH

Fuwa Yuzuki: ASDFGHKKSIEHCDLQWDJ

Fuwa Yuzuki: FINALLY

Nakamura Rio: You are a queen

Nakamura Rio: No homo but can I kiss you?

Mimura Kouki: How is it no homo if you’re kissing her

Nakamura Rio: It’s no homo cause I’m bi

Mimura Kouki: I see

Mimura Kouki: Continue

Okajima Taiga: Soo hot

Kataoka Megu: OKAJIMA I SWEAR TO GOD

Nakamura Rio: You know what?

Nakamura Rio: @Hayami Rinka @Chiba Ryuunosuke 

Okajima Taiga has left the chat

Shiota Nagisa: What just happened

Nakamura Rio: Nothing sweetie 

Nakamura Rio: Don’t worry your pretty little head about it

Shiota Nagisa: Umm

Group Chat: KOOL KIDZ SQUAD

Fuwa Yuzuki: Sooooo

Fuwa Yuzuki: @Maehara Hiroto @Isogai Yuuma

Isogai Yuuma: Yes, Fuwa 

Maehara Hiroto: What is it

Fuwa Yuzuki: Took_Em_Long_Enough.png

Fuwa Yuzuki: Care to explain (smirk face) (winky face)

Isogai Yuuma: Oh my uh (embarrassed face) 

Nakamura Rio: Yeeeeessssss……

Maehara Hiroto: OKANO FFS

Okano Hinata: Why what’s the matter

Maehara Hiroto: HOW COULD YOU

Koro-Sensei: EXACTLY

Fuwa Yuzuki: Huh?

Koro-Sensei: HOW COULD YOU GET INFO ON MY SHIPS BEFORE ME WITHOUT INFORMING ME

Shiota Nagisa: Seriously, sir?

Maehara Hiroto: NOT THE POINT

Maehara Hiroto: YOU SWORE THAT YOU WOULDN’T POST THAT

Okano Hinata: I didn’t

Okano Hinata: I just shared it to every single one of our classmates except you

Nakamura Rio: We weren't surprised TBH

Fuwa Yuzuki: Yeah we all know that you make each other’s Kokoros go doki doki

Okano Hinata: What she said

Fuwa Yuzuki: Just tell me

Fuwa Yuzuki: Has the SS.MAEISO set sail (face with heart eyes)

Isogai Yuuma: If you’re asking if Maehara and I are dating 

Isogai Yuuma: Then yes

Maehara Hiroto: Yeah

Fuwa Yuzuki: ASDFGHJYGFRDEDXDJE 

Fuwa Yuzuki: OTP

Fuwa Yuzuki: I NEED TO KNOW EVERYTHING

Fuwa Yuzuki: WHO CONFESSED TO WHO, HOW LONG HAVE YOU GUYS BEEN PINING FOR, WHEN WILL YOU GET MARRIED, WHAT COLOUR ARE YOUR CURTAINS AND BEDSHEETS GONNA BE WHEN YOU MOVE IN TOGETHER, WHOSE GONNA PICK UP THE KIDS FROM SCHOOL, ARE YOUR WEDDING COLOURS GONNA BE EYE-COLOURS OR FAVOURITE COLOUR

Kimura Masayoshi: Fuwa chill

Mimura Kouki: Not even Okano is fangirling this much

Okano Hinata: YES MY PRAYERS HAVE BEEN ANSWERED

Mimura Kouki: Never mind

Nakamura Rio: I am so proud of myself

Mimura Kouki: But you did practically nothing apart from suggesting we drug/knock out Maehara and Isogai

Isogai Yuuma: WHAT

Maehara Hiroto: WAIT WHAT THE HELL NAKAMURA

Nakamura Rio: SHHH I didn’t actually do it

Okano Hinata: Anygays

Sugaya Sousuke: You mean ‘anyways’ right?

Okano Hinata: Lol, nope

Okano Hinata: Anygays

Okano Hinata: I know that we’re all very happy that those two are finally together but Maehara if you even think about hurting the Ikeman, you’re dead :)

Okano Hinata: Got it :)

Maehara Hiroto: Y-yes ma’am

Okano Hinata: Good :)

Hara Sumire: I second that

Hara Sumire: No one hurts my children

Maehara Hiroto: Aren’t I your child too

Hara Sumire: I like Isogai more

Maehara Hiroto: TBH same

Fuwa Yuzuki: Same here

Fuwa Yuzuki: WOMANIZER I SWEAR TO YATO THAT IF YOU MAKE THAT PRINCE CHARMING OF AN IKEMAN SHED A SINGLE TEAR I WILL END YOU

Maehara Hiroto: Fuwa, if I do anything to hurt Isogai you have my permission to end me in any way you wish

Isogai Yuuma: Hiroto, no (sad face)

Fuwa Yuzuki: OMG THEY CALL EACH OTHER BY THEIR GIVEN NAMES HGFDFGHNBGHYTGBGFGBHN

Shiota Nagisa: Guys, what have I said about death threats in the group chat

Akabane Karma: Does that mean that we can make death threats out of the group chat

Shiota Nagisa: No Karma

Akabane Karma: Worth a shot

Shiota Nagisa: I don’t want any of you guys to die

Shiota Nagisa: I care about each and every one of you

Kayano Kaede: Nagisa…

Nakamura Rio: Aww, ‘Gisa

Hayami Rinka: Even Okajima? (thinking face)

Akabane Karma: I care about you too Nagisa

Okajima Taiga: HEY

Yada Touka: We care about you too, Honey

Okano Hinata: Seriously what did we do to deserve him

Shiota Nagisa: Of course I care about you as well, @Okajima Taiga

Nakamura Rio: You best love and protect him with your life Karma because if you don’t I’m claiming dibs

Shiota Nagisa: Hey Guys (smiley blushy face)

Kayano Kaede: Hi Nagisa

Sugino Tomohito: What’s the matter, dude

Shiota Nagisa: Nothing

Shiota Nagisa: Isogai and I have something to say

Kurahashi Hinano: Really (smiley emoji)

Isogai Yuuma: Yes we do

Nakamura Rio: Alright, spill the tea boys

Shiota Nagisa: Okay

Shiota Nagisa: 3

Isogai Yuuma: 2

Shiota Nagisa: 1

Shiota Nagisa: @Akabane Karma

Isogai Yuuma: @Maehara Hiroto

Akabane Karma: Hey Nagisa

Akabane Karma: Whats up

Maehara Hiroto: Yuuma, whats the matter?

Shiota Nagisa: You can be the peanut butter to my jelly

Akabane Karma: Huh

Sugino Tomohito: ???

Kayano Kaede: Nagisa, are you alright

Nakamura Rio: If you need help just send a random emoji

Okajima Taiga: Since when do you eat peanut butter?

Isogai Yuuma: You can be the butterflies I feel in my belly

Kurahashi Hinano: I LOVE BUTTERFLIES <3

Yada Touka: Me too <3

Fuwa Yuzuki: Wait a minute…

Maehara Hiroto: Yuuma?

Maehara Hiroto: Are you sick

Maehara Hiroto: Do you want me to come over?

Shiota Nagisa: You can be the captain and I can be your first mate

Terasaka Ryouma: Literally what the f*** is going on

Yoshida Taisei: IDK man I’m so confused 

Fuwa Yuzuki: OMG I GET IT NOW

Fuwa Yuzuki: KEEP ON GOING BOYS I NEED TO SCREEN RECORD THIS S**T

Akabane Karma: Nagisa is this some code or something

Akabane Karma: Have you been binge watching DC, Marvel and Sonic Ninja fan theories again

Sugino Tomohito: Captain?

Sugino Tomohito: First mate?

Nakamura Rio: Why would you go on a boat with Karma

Nakamura Rio: He’ll probably set fire to the thing

Isogai Yuuma: You can be the chills that I feel on our first date

Maehara Hiroto: I always get chills when I’m with you

Yada Touka: That’s adorable

Maehara Hiroto: I mean we always hang out but we’ve never been on our official first date yet

Shiota Nagisa: You can be the hero and I can be your sidekick

Fuwa Yuzuki: YOU ARE MORE THAN A SIDEKICK NAGISA.

Fuwa Yuzuki: YOU ARE THE GODDAMN MAIN CHARACTER

Akabane Karma: You dont need to be my sidekick Nagi

Akabane Karma: I’ll make sure to never leave your side anyway

Kayano Kaede: AWWW (heart emoji) (heart eyes emoji) 

Sugino Tomohito: I’ll always be there for you as well Nagisa

Isogai Yuuma: You can be the tear that I cry if we ever split

Maehara Hiroto: NO YUUMA

Maehara Hiroto: I SWEAR I’LL NEVER SPLIT WITH YOU OR MAKE YOU CRY

Okano Hinata: YOU BETTER NOT

Kataoka Megu: I WILL COME FOR YOU

Hara Sumire: ^^

Maehara Hiroto: IF I DO I WILL YEET MYSELF OFF OF A CLIFF

Shiota Nagisa: You can be the rain from the cloud when it's stormin'

Sugino Tomohito: But Nagisa you don’t like storms

Nakamura Rio: As if you can get wet by the rain

Nakamura Rio: You’re so pure that the drops will just avoid you

Akabane Karma: Don’t worry Nagisa if you get wet and I’ll fight the sky

Kimura Masayoshi: But you can’t-

Akabane Karma: I’LL FIGHT THE SKY

Isogai Yuuma: Or you can be the sun when it shines in the mornin'

Maehara Hiroto: But how can I be the sun if you are my sun?

Maehara Hiroto: Actually Yuuma, you’re brighter than any star in the sky

Okuda Manami: This is so wholesome and pure (happy face)

Kataoka Megu: Yeah

Kataoka Megu: Someone better make sure that Okajima doenst come and ruin it

Okajima Taiga: I DIDN’T EVEN DO ANYTHING

Hayami Rinka: Yet

Shiota Nagisa: Don't know if I could ever be

Isogai Yuuma: Without you 'cause boy you complete me

Maehara Hiroto: You complete me too!

Akabane Karma: Yeah Nagisa I don’t know what I’d do without you

Yada Touka: Oh my heart <3

Nakamura Rio: Probably running from the cops

Shiota Nagisa: And in time I know that we'll both see

Isogai Yuuma: That we're all we need

Kurahashi Hinano: This is so sweet and cute (heart eyes emoji)

Okano Hinata: Karma, Maehara, you guys are so lucky

Terasaka Ryouma: Eww

Okano Hinata: SHUT THE HELL UP TERASAKA

Fuwa Yuzuki: Don’t worry guys I got you

Fuwa Yuzuki: I’ll back you up (thumbs up emoji)

Shiota Nagisa: 'Cause you're the apple to my pie 

Fuwa Yuzuki: pie

Kanzaki Yukiko: You like apple pie, Nagisa?

Hara Sumire: I can make you some, sweetie (smiley emoji)

Kayano Kaede: I can buy you some from the cafe

Akabane Karma: I can feed it to you

Isogai Yuuma: You're the straw to my berry

Fuwa Yuzuki: berry

Maehara Hiroto: Don't worry Iso, I'll give you all the strawberries you want

Shiota Nagisa: You're the smoke to my high 

Fuwa Yuzuki: high

Hara Sumire: HIGH!

Sugino Tomohito: Are you doing drugs

Okajima Taiga: Can you hit me up

Okano Hinata: Guys it’s Nagisa, of course he’s not doing drugs

Terasaka Ryouma: He’s dating Akabane so I wouldnt blame him

Akabane Karma: SHUT UP BEFORE I STAB YOU

Isogai Yuuma: And you're the one I wanna marry 

Fuwa Yuzuki: marry

Maehara Hiroto: I wanna marry you too

Okano Hinata: I call dibs on Maid of Honour

Yada Touka: Is this a proposal

Mimura Kouki: We’re literally Junior High kids????

Akabane Karma: So what

Akabane Karma: Hey Nagisa wanna get married?

Nakamura Rio: Not with that sort of proposal he’s not

Shiota Nagisa: 'Cause you're the one for me 

Fuwa Yuzuki: for me

Okano Hinata: Really?

Okano Hinata: You sure about that?

Kayano Kaede: Out of everyone

Sugino Tomohito: Literally everyone

Kayano Kaede: You had to choose Karma

Akabane Karma: HEY

Akabane Karma: YOU WERE THE ONES THAT WANTED US TOGETHER

Kayano Kaede: Yeah because Nagisa liked you and you made him happy

Kayano Kaede: But the moment you stop making him happy…

Kayano Kaede: :)

Isogai Yuuma: And I'm the one for you 

Fuwa Yuzuki: for you

Maehara Hiroto: That you are Yuuma (smiley face) (heart eyes face)

Kurahashi Hinano: AHH CUTENESS OVERLOAD I CAN’T TAKE THIS

Hayami Rinka: It is very sweet

Okajima Taiga: IT’S SO PURE I CANT EVEN SAY ANYTHING

Muramatsu Takuya: Guys I’m crying

Yoshida Taisei: Same, bro, same

Shiota Nagisa: You take the both of us 

Fuwa Yuzuki: of us

Isogai Yuuma: And we're the perfect two

Maehara Hiroto: We are (heart eyes face)

Shiota Nagisa: We’re the perfect two

Akabane Karma: Damn right we are

Shiota Nagisa: Okay we’re done now

Isogai Yuuma: That was fun

Okuda Manami: What was that

Takebayashi Koutarou: It was a lyric prank

Maehara Hiroto: Wait

Fuwa Yuzuki: Takebayashi you knew

Takebayashi Koutarou: I know my fanfics

Akabane Karma: THAT WAS A PRANK

Maehara Hiroto: Yuu, you don’t want to get married? (sad face)

Isogai Yuuma: I mean not now

Isogai Yuuma: But in the future, maybe?

Maehara Hiroto: YES

Akabane Karma: Nagisa..

Shiota Nagisa: Karma of course I think those things about you

Shiota Nagisa: Just because the song was a prank doesnt mean the lyrics aren’t true

Shiota Nagisa: I’ll always think of you as my other half (smiley face)

Nakamura Rio: ‘Gisa you angel

Akabane Karma: I was just gonna ask if I could still feed you pie

Akabane Karma: But that’s good too (smirk face)

Shiota Nagisa: KARMA

Sugino Tomohito: Really?

Kayano Kaede: Again

Kayano Kaede: Literally ANYONE

Mimura Kouki: I’m going to bed

Chapter Text

Kurahashi Hinano: SCHOOL TRIP SCHOOL TRIP SCHOOL TRIP

Okano Hinata: I don’t know about you guys but I think that Kurahashi is excited for our upcoming overnight school trip

Yada Touka: I think so too (smiley face)

Kurahashi Hinano: SORRY GUYS I JUST LOVE GOING ON SCHOOL TRIPS

Kayano Kaede: Same here

Kayano Kaede: I just love spending more time with this class and getting to know each other better

Kayano Kaede: It makes this class feel more like a family

Shiota Nagisa: We love spending time with you as well Kayano

Shiota Nagisa: I definitely consider you a part of my family (smiley blushy face)

Kayano Kaede: BRB gotta go cry because an angel just texted me

Shiota Nagisa: ??

Kayano Kaede: Treat him right @Akabane Karma or I’m coming for your intestines 

Akabane Karma: Noted

Nakamura Rio: Hey girls, where are you, I’ve just arrived

Hara Sumire: Fuwa, Hazama and I are at the bookstore near the entrance

Kayano Kaede: I’m with Nagisa and Okuda

Kayano Kaede: We’re nearly there

Kataoka Megu: Okano, Hayami and I are at the sports store

Kataoka Megu: It’s next to the pancake stand on the second floor

Kurahashi Hinano: Yada and I are just arriving 

Kurahashi Hinano: Where should we meet up 

Hara Sumire: I vote the fountain on the round floor

Kataoka Megu: Yes that seems like a good landmark

Nakamura Rio: Gotcha

Kayano Kaede: (thumbs up emoji)

Maehara Hiroto: Uhh what’s going on

Maehara Hiroto: What are you girls up to

Akabane Karma: and why is Nagisa with you

Kurahashi Hinano: We’re at the mall

Kurahashi Hinano: We’re having a girls day out and we decided to invite Nagisa with us because he’s nice

Nakamura Rio: And in dire need of a wardrobe change

Shiota Nagisa: WHAT

Shiota Nagisa: What’s wrong with the way I dress

Kayano Kaede: Nagisa you’re my best friend and I love you but you dress like a grandpa

Shiota Nagisa: No I don’t

Okano Hinata: You’re clothes are really baggy

Okano Hinata: And I’m not saying that those sweater paws aren’t as adorable as hell but wouldn’t it be nice to not have to roll your sleeves up 24/7

Shiota Nagisa: I buy them loose so that I’ll grow into them in the future

Shiota Nagisa: It saves money

Nakamura Rio: Sweetie I don’t think you’re going to grow THAT MUCH

Shiota Nagisa: My growth spurt is coming okay

Shiota Nagisa: I still have at least two years until puberty stops

Kayano Kaede: I’m willing to bet my entire supply of pudding cups that you spend at least 80% of your clothing budget on socks

Shiota Nagisa: What’s wrong with liking socks

Shiota Nagisa: They’re comfortable

Sugino Tomohito: Dude, you’ve got like a thousand pairs

Shiota Nagisa: Okay, that’s definitely an exaggeration 

Shiota Nagisa: But my clothes are nice

Akabane Karma: Nagi if I had to draw a pie chart to describe your clothing budget it would look like this

Shiota Nagisa: That

Shiota Nagisa: That is not entirely incorrect

Shiota Nagisa: But they keep me warm so I don’t see the issue

Akabane Karma: I can keep you warm

Shiota Nagisa: It’s okay the clothes are enough

Maehara Hiroto: ANYWAY Nagisa’s terrible fashion choices aside

Okajima Taiga: WHY WEREN’T WE INVITED

Hayami Rinka: Because you’re not Nagisa

Kimura Masayoshi: Alright that’s fair

Chiba Ryuunosuke: But babe

Hayami Rinka: It’s the truth

Shiota Nagisa: It’s okay Chiba you can come and hang out with us as well

Shiota Nagisa: I don’t have a problem with it

Akabane Karma: I’M COMING AS WELL

Kayano Kaede: NO

Fuwa Yuzuki: NO WAY 

Nakamura Rio: ABSOLUTELY NOT

Okano Hinata: Karma we don’t need your overprotective boyfriend tendencies ruining our shopping trip

Akabane Karma: I’m not overprotective 

Sugaya Sousuke: Two days ago you threatened to kill me because I got a speck of paint on Nagisa’s face

Shiota Nagisa: WAIT WHAT

Akabane Karma: THAT PAINT COULD’VE GOTTEN IN HIS EYE AND PERMANENTLY BLINDED HIM A*HOLE. MY BEAUTIFUL BOYFRIEND COULD'VE BEEN CRIPPLED FOR LIFE

Shiota Nagisa: …

Shiota Nagisa: Karma if you don’t come I’ll spend the night at your place 

Akabane Karma: Or how about I do come and you spend the night at my place anyways

Shiota Nagisa: Or how about you come and I don’t go to your place for a week

Okano Hinata: OOHH

Maehara Hiroto: Man I am LOVING this 

Kimura Masayoshi: Yeah this drama is better than cable

Akabane Karma: …

Akabane Karma: Fine

Nakamura Rio: And Nagisa the Karma Whisperer strikes again

Fuwa Yuzuki: Hah ‘strikes’

Shiota Nagisa: ?

Fuwa Yuzuki: Get it

Fuwa Yuzuki: Cause snake

Fuwa Yuzuki: Strikes

Mimura Kouki: What

Hara Sumire: Don’t mind her she had like five boxes of tic tacs earlier

Fuwa Yuzuki: I can feel the power surging through my veins

Kayano Kaede: Okay guys we’re here

Kataoka Megu: I see you look to your right

Shiota Nagisa: Can someone with sense please stop the girls from buying the whole store

Shiota Nagisa: They’ve already filled like three baskets with things they want me to try on

Fuwa Yuzuki: We told you that we’re revamping your wardrobe Nagi

Akabane Karma: HEY 

Akabane Karma:  ONLY I GET TO CALL HIM NAGI

Fuwa Yuzuki: Besides

Fuwa Yuzuki: Mama needs to make sure her son gets the best

Hara Sumire: What do you mean ‘your’ son, Fuwa :)

Fuwa Yuzuki: I-I mean OUR son, Hara

Hara Sumire: Good

Shiota Nagisa: You guys know that you aren’t actually my mums right?

Nakamura Rio: Ooooh

Fuwa Yuzuki: You’re grounded young man

Shiota Nagisa: WE’RE THE SAME AGE

Yoshida Taisei: You know there’s something I don’t get about this whole family thing

Yoshida Taisei: Hara, you’re our mum, right?

Hara Sumire: Well, yeah

Fuwa Yuzuki: I’VE GOT JOINT CUSTODY OF NAGISA

Yoshida Taisei: Well, doesn’t that mean that Karmagisa and Maeiso are technically incest

Hara Sumire: …

Fuwa Yuzuki: …

Shiota Nagisa: …

Akabane Karma: …

Maehara Hiroto: …

Isogai Yuuma: …

Sugino Tomohito: Dude

Sugino Tomohito: What the hell

Fuwa Yuzuki: Are you trying to blow holes in my ships

Shiota Nagisa: What…

Sugaya Sousuke: ONE DAY

Sugaya Sousuke: CAN’T WE HAVE ONE DAY WHERE EVERYONE ACTS LIKE NORMAL SANE HUMAN BEINGS

Kurahashi Hinano: SCHOOL TRIP TODAY WHOOO

Isogai Yuuma: Remember to pack for two days

Karasuma Tadaomi: I would just like to inform everyone that you’ll be separated by gender into rooms of four and six

Karasuma Tadaomi: Due to the nature of this class I have decided to allocate the rooms myself 

Karasuma Tadaomi: The rooms will be divided as so:

Room 1: Sugaya, Maehara, Okajima, Nagisa

Room 2: Chiba, Terasaka, Kimura, Sugino, Muramatsu

Room 3: Yoshida, Isogai, Karma, Mimura, Takebayashi

Room 4: Nakamura, Okuda, Fuwa, Hazama

Room 5: Kanzaki, Hayami, Kataoka, Kayano

Room 6: Yada, Kurahashi, Okano, Hara

Maehara Hiroto: WAIT WHAT

Akabane Karma: HOW

Maehara Hiroto: YOU’RE SEPARATING ME AND ISOGAI

Akabane Karma: WHY CAN’T I ROOM WITH NAGISA

Terasaka Ryuoma: I’m just glad that I don’t have to share with Akabane

Karma >>> Maehara

Karma: You are switching with Nagisa right

Maehara: Well duh

Group Chat: KOOL KIDZ SQUAD

Karasuma Tadaomi: And let me say now that absolutely no one can switch rooms

Karma >>> Maehara

Karma: Well dang it

Group Chat: KOOL KIDZ SQUAD

Shiota Nagisa: Well this could be fun

Shiota Nagisa: It will be fun sharing a room with the three of you, Sugaya, Okajima and Maehara

Sugaya Sousuke: I’m looking forward to it as well

Fuwa Yuzuki: Okajima you better keep your pervy hands away from Nagisa alright

Hara Sumire: @Okajima Taiga you even think about corrupting my child and you’ll regret it :)

Okajima Taiga: I HAVEN’T EVEN DONE ANYTHING

Kayano Kaede: :)

Okajima Taiga: Okay geez

Kurahashi Hinano: AHH WE’VE GOT BUNKBEDS

Kurahashi Hinano: THIS PLACE IS AMAZING

Kayano Kaede: So Nagisa, what’s happening in your room?

Okajima Taiga: Maehara and him are singing musical duets

Nakamura Rio: WHAT

Okano Hinata: WHAT

Akabane Karma: WHAT

Isogai Yuuma: WHAT

Fuwa Yuzuki: OMG SEND PICS

Yada Touka: Wait a minute I know that song

Kurahashi Hinano: Yeah, it’s from that movie about the circus

Nakamura Rio: You mean The Greatest Showman

Yada Touka: Yeah it’s called The Other Side

Yada Touka: My brother loves the songs from the movie

Akabane Karma: I didn’t know that Nagisa even knew musicals

Kayano Kaede: Yeah, he was really confused when we were singing Hamilton a while back

Isogai Yuuma: Oh Maehara introduced him to musicals 

Isogai Yuuma: They do karaoke together

Akabane Karma: Wait WHAT

Akabane Karma: Why didn’t I know about 

Nakamura Rio: You getting jealous

Akabane Karma: No

Nakamura Rio: Alright Jealabane

Akabane Karma: Don’t call me that

Nakamura Rio: Okay Jealabane

Sugino Tomohito: Nagisa is a really good singer

Sugino Tomohito: He sings with my brother when we watch disney movies together

Sugaya Sousuke: I’m getting a fully choreographed performance here 

Okajima Taiga: Yall wish you were us right now huh

Nakamura Rio: Karma right now: Let me in meme

Takebayashi Koutarou: That is not incorrect

Mimura Kouki: Yeah Isogai and Yoshida have literally tried to restrain him like five times now to stop him from escaping

Okajima Taiga: So what’s happening in the other rooms

Muramatsu Takuya: Kimura and Sugino are talking about sports stuff and reading their sport magazines

Muramatsu Takuya: Terasaka and Chiba are playing board games with me

Hara Sumire: Yada, Kurahashi and Okano are playing twister

Nakamura Rio: Yall brought TWISTER

Nakamura Rio: Fuwa, Hazama and Okuda are talking about the scientific accuracies in literature and manga

Nakamura Rio: I’m just vibing

Kayano Kaede: @Okuda Manami pls tell me you didn’t bring your chemistry set

Okuda Manami: I did

Akabane Karma: Nice

Kataoka Megu: Okuda

Okuda Manami: I never really leave home without it

Okajima Taiga: Oh by the way @Sugino Tomohito

Sugino Tomohito: What

Okajima Taiga: SUCK_IT.png (Okajima’s picture is a selfie of him with an arm around Nagisa and a bowl full of Nagisa’s handmade cookies between them. Maehara and Sugaya are also eating cookies in the frame)

Sugino Tomohito: WHAT THE HELL DUDE

Okajima Taiga: This is what happens when you take too many cookies during the class party

Okajima Taiga: Who’s got privileges now

Okajima Taiga: (sunglasses smirk face)

Kayano Kaede: NAGISA BROUGHT COOKIES

Shiota Nagisa: Yeah just in case we got hungry on the ride here

Yoshida Taisei: Oi Okajima sharing is caring

Fuwa Yuzuki: Hey is that a snake tattoo on Nagisa’s arm

Shiota Nagisa: No

Shiota Nagisa: Sugaya just painted it on earlier 

Shiota Nagisa: It’s so cool that I feel too guilty to wash it off later 

Maehara Hiroto: Speaking of snakes

Maehara Hiroto: @Akabane Karma

Maehara Hiroto: You know he brought that snake plushie you bought him back when we went to the zoo

Okano Hinata: Aww really (heart eyes face)

Shiota Nagisa: It helps me sleep

Yada Touka: That is so cool

Kurahashi Hinano: I brought my stuffed animals as well

Sugaya Sousuke: Finally a normal conversation

Fuwa Yuzuki: GUYS I HAVE A BAG FULL OF TIC TACS WHO WANTS IN

Sugaya Sousuke: F***

Chapter Text

Maehara Hiroto: GUYS 

Maehara Hiroto: GUYS

Maehara Hiroto: @Everyone

Maehara Hiroto: Can SOMEONE PLEASE explain to me how it’s possible for a human to wake up flawless

Maehara Hiroto: Like I already have to deal with the literal beauty that is my boyfriend and love of my life who owns my heart and can do no wrong whatsoever, Isogai Yuuma (aka a literal prince charming) god bless

Isogai Yuuma: HIROTO (embarrassed face)

Mimura Kouki: Just to let you guys know - Isogai did in fact scream and is now hunched up in a ball

Mimura Kouki: Why_You_Guys_Always_Breaking_People.png

Terasaka Ryouma: This class makes me sick

Terasaka Ryouma: Literally

Terasaka Ryouma: Y’all make me wanna throw up

Maehara Hiroto: Yeah yeah whatever

Maehara Hiroto: BTW thank you Mimura for my new screensaver

Maehara Hiroto: N E WAYS back to the topic at hand SOMEONE JUST EXPLAIN

Shiota Nagisa: Explain what Maehara?

Maehara Hiroto: YOU

Shiota Nagisa: ???

Maehara Hiroto: HOW THE HELL DO YOU WAKE UP LIKE YOU’VE JUST COME BACK FROM A PHOTOSHOOT

Maehara Hiroto: The_Hell_Do_You_Eat?.png (https://pin.it/3UAAOQe this isn’t the actual picture bc Nagisa has bedhead in it but it’s still a really cute piece of Nagisa fanart)

Shiota Nagisa: This is why you took a picture of me waking up

Akabane Karma: YOU DID WHAT

Yoshida Taisei: He says as he saves that picture to his photos

Maehara Hiroto: Like I always wake up like a zombie but you’re like 

Maehara Hiroto: Bedhead? I don’t know her

Maehara Hiroto: Skin creases? Never met her

Fuwa Yuzuki: Hotel? Trivago

Maehara Hiroto: I need at least five minutes in the bathroom to avoid looking like a zombie and here you are fresh as a daisy off the bat. 

Maehara Hiroto: PLEASE TELL ME YOUR WAYS

Shiota Nagisa: I don’t really do anything

Shiota Nagisa: I really do just wake up like this

Nakamura Rio: We know this and we love you

Sugaya Sousuke: And now Nagisa’s broken

Sugaya Sousuke: Congratulations guys you just rendered the only responsible boys in this class that can actually handle you crazies

Kayano Kaede: WE’RE NOT CRAZY

Sugaya Sousuke: Two words Kayano

Sugaya Sousuke: Pudding

Sugaya Sousuke: Bomb

Kayano Kaede: That

Kayano Kaede: That is a fair point

Kayano Kaede: But it’s not our fault that he’s the definition of perfection

Shiota Nagisa: KAYANO PLEASE ASDDFGTYRKEQK

Sugino Tomohito: Normally I would be against you guys making Nagisa uncomfortable but he clearly hasn’t been given enough positive reinforcement in his life so compliment away

Okano Hinata: Sugino be like:

Okano Hinata: ‘It’s loving Nagisa Hours 24/7 365 days a year’

Akabane Karma: As it should be

Maehara Hiroto: rt

Sugino Tomohito: Well, yeah. He’s my bro

Hara Sumire: Guys remember the day Sugino and Nagisa became friends?

Okano Hinata: Yeah, Sugino didn’t you burst into the classroom carrying Nagisa bridal style and said that you only became friends with him a minute and a half ago but if anything happened to him you’d kill the whole class and then yourself?

Kimura Masayoshi: I remember that

Kimura Masayoshi: I was so confused

Akabane Karma: You did what?

Nakamura Rio: Yeah I got a picture of it 

Nakamura Rio: The_Bromance_Is_Real.jpg

Maehara Hiroto: Nagisa’s face is literally 

Maehara Hiroto: (• - •)

Shiota Nagisa: It was a very confusing experience

Shiota Nagisa: But I had acquired one (1) friend so I was happy

Sugino Tomohito: Dude, we’re not friends

Sugino Tomohito: We’re frickin BESTIES 

Shiota Nagisa: Oh I got scared there for a second

Sugino Tomohito: DUDE I’M SORRY

Shiota Nagisa: NO IT’S OKAY I LOVE YOU (＾◡＾)

Sugino Tomohito: I LOVE YOU TOO (＾◡＾)

Okano Hinata: This is so sweet (´⌣`ʃƪ)

Okano Hinata: Protect them

Kayano Kaede: I will :)

Muramatsu Takuya: Well, that’s not ominous at all

Yoshida Taisei: *sweatdrop*

Fuwa Yuzuki: Don’t worry guys, I’ve already got my Death Note ready and waiting for the names of those who wronged them

Hazama Kirara: Nice

Akabane Karma: (thumbs up)

Shiota Nagisa: Alright 

Shiota Nagisa: 1) Fuwa, Death Notes don’t exist and definitely don’t work

Fuwa Yuzuki: That’s what you think :)

Muramatsu Takuya: Mum come pick me up I’m scared

Hara Sumire: Sorry sweetie I’m stuck here as well

Shiota Nagisa: 2) PLEASE FOR THE LOVE OF GOD DON’T KILL ANYONE FOR ME

Akabane Karma: Why not

Kayano Kaede: You deserve nothing less

Fuwa Yuzuki: We will slaughter the entire nation if it would keep you safe 

Sugino Tomohito: I don’t agree with murder but I will use my baseball bat in not baseball ways to protect you

Shiota Nagisa: NO PLEASE DON’T

Shiota Nagisa: I know that I’m not the best at combat but you guys don’t need to protect me

Shiota Nagisa: Sugino I get because he’s awesome 

Sugino Tomohito: No you are

Shiota Nagisa: But ME??!!!

Nakamura Rio: Nagisa, it’s because you’re b a b e y

Fuwa Yuzuki: ^^^

All of the girls: ^^^

Shiota Nagisa: WHAT

Shiota Nagisa: I’M NOT A BABY

Kayano Kaede: Nagisa, last week I saw you bump into a table 

Kayano Kaede: AND THEN APOLOGISE AND BOW 

Kayano Kaede: TO THE TABLE

Shiota Nagisa: You guys literally call me the Dad Friend 

Kurahashi Hinano: Awww that’s so cute (heart eyes)

Sugino Tomohito: Yeah, and whilst I am aware of how you hold like half of the brain cells of this class and are one of the only responsible people apart from Isogai and Kataoka I can confirm that you are cute

Shiota Nagisa: SUGINO

Sugino Tomohito: Dude just let it happen

Sugino Tomohito: I have a picture of that group of kittens from the animal shelter following you around like they had imprinted on you and have claimed you as one of their own

Kayano Kaede: Sugino

Kayano Kaede: My dear dear friend

Kayano Kaede: I will give you the answers for our maths homework for a week if you send me that photo

Shiota Nagisa: SUGINO NO

Kataoka Megu: No one is giving anyone the answers

Isogai Yuuma: You do realise that our teachers can see this chat right?

Kimura Masayoshi: Also, I’m pretty sure that Koro-Sensei gives all of us different homework assignments depending on our skill level

Kayano Kaede: Damn you right

Kayano Kaede: @Sugino Tomohito I’ll buy you a baseball themed water bottle

Sugino Tomohito: Deal

Shiota Nagisa: NO

Kayano Kaede: But-

Shiota Nagisa: :(

Sugino Tomohito: ...

Sugino Tomohito: Alright fine I won’t

Yoshida Taisei: Well damn

Mimura Kouki: The power he holds

Nakamura Rio: Well, what do you expect

Nakamura Rio: It’s NAGISA

Akabane Karma: True

Maehara Hiroto: I’m just glad that he’s on our side

Maehara Hiroto: Like just imagine if he went dark

Everyone: …

Okajima Taiga: Oh hell no

Kayano Kaede: I’d join him ngl

Okano Hinata: Yeah same here

Shiota Nagisa: GUYS IM NOT GOING TO GO DARK

Nakamura Rio: We know that Nagisa

Nakamura Rio: You’re too nice for that

Nakamura Rio: But if you ever do, you’ve got the whole class behind you

Shiota Nagisa: Thanks...I think?

Kayano Kaede: You’re welcome (blushy smiley face)

Okajima Taiga: Yeah, man, don’t worry

Okajima Taiga: And if you ever need to collect data on your enemies I happen to be amazing at gathering intel

Okajima Taiga: Like how Mimura practices air guitar behind the shed after school

Okajima Taiga: Shot_Through_The_Heart_And_You’re_To_Blame.png

Mimura Kouki: I WILL FRY YOU LIKE A TEMPURA OKAJIMA

Nakamura Rio: Damn you are getting into it, huh?

Mimura Kouki: I hate it here

Terasaka Ryouma: So do I yet do you see me complaining

Akabane Karma: Yes we do

Terasaka Ryouma: AKABANE I SWEAR

Isogai Yuuma: Karma please

Akabane Karma: Why is it that I’m always the one getting told off?

Akabane Karma: Even when we go on trips I’m the only one who always has to be told to ‘behave’ 

Sugino Tomohito: Probably because you’re always unnecessarily provoking people

Akabane Karma: Come on I don’t provoke people unnecessary

Shiota Nagisa: Last Tuesday you ‘accidently’ spilt your milk on Koyama from the Big Five’s lap during our date in a cafe when you saw that people from Class A were also there

Kataoka Megu: You did what?

Isogai Yuuma: Really Karma?

Okano Hinata: To be honest though, he did make a jab at E-Class the day before so he did have it coming

Maehara Hiroto: HE HAD IT COMING

Okajima Taiga: HE HAD IT COMING

Nakamura Rio: HE ONLY HAD HIMSELF TO BLAME

Yada Touka: IF YOU’D HAVE BEEN THERE

Okano Hinata: IF YOU’D HAVE HEARD IT

Maehara Hiroto: I

Okajima Taiga: BETCHA 

Maehara Hiroto: YOU

Okajima Taiga: WOULD 

Maehara Hiroto: HAVE 

Okajima Taiga: DONE 

Maehara Hiroto: THE 

Okajima Taiga: SAME

Kataoka Megu: What the hell I can hear you boys screaming from my room

Okano Hinata: Did anyone else hear some loud banging noise or

Sugaya Sousuke: That was me shutting them up

Nakamura Rio: NO LET THE THEATRE NERDS THRIVE

Nakamura Rio: VIVA LA REVOLUTION

Nakamura Rio: DO YOU HEAR THE PEOPLE SING

Nakamura Rio: SINGING THE SONG OF ANGRY MEN

Okano Hinata: Why angry men

Okano Hinata: Are women not allowed to be angry

Nakamura Rio: IDK 

Nakamura Rio: Patriarchy stuff 

Okano Hinata: Ah

Kimura Masayoshi: Alright quick question

Kimura Masayoshi: @Fuwa Yuzuki WHY THE HELL DO I HAVE AN EMAIL FROM YOU WITH 40 FILES

Fuwa Yuzuki: Oh sorry Kimura, I was supposed to send those to Takebayashi

Fuwa Yuzuki: They’re just pdfs of this manga I downloaded

Yoshida Taisei: Holy sh*t 40!!!

Fuwa Yuzuki: Some of them have more

Yada Touka: How does your phone have so much storage

Fuwa Yuzuki: I worked hard

Kimura Masayoshi: What does that even mean?

Nakamura Rio: I mean I don’t blame the girl

Nakamura Rio: Some people are just really into fictional characters

Nakamura Rio: For example

Nakamura Rio: Nagisa, would you leave Karma for Peter Parker?

Akabane Karma: WHAT SORT OF STUPID QUESTION IS THAT

Nakamura Rio: Well, Nagisa?

Shiota Nagisa: ….

Akabane Karma: Nagisa?

Kimura Masayoshi: HE’S HESITATING 

Okajima Taiga: The tea here is piping 

Shiota Nagisa: ...No

Akabane Karma: WHY THE HELL DID IT TAKE YOU A MINUTE TO TYPE ONE WORD

Shiota Nagisa: The building has poor connection

Akabane Karma: MY ROOM IS LITERALLY RIGHT ACROSS FROM YOURS

Shiota Nagisa: ...

Shiota Nagisa: Bye everyone

Shiota Nagisa has left the chat

Akabane Karma: SHIOTA NAGISA YOU GET YOUR BUTT BACK IN HERE OR

Hara Sumire: Or you’ll do what Karma? :)

Kayano Kaede: (knife emoji) (knife emoji) (knife emoji)

Sugino Tomohito: :)

Fuwa Yuzuki: *clicks gun*

Akabane Karma: …

Akabane Karma has left the chat

Kataoka Megu: Guys, Karasuma has texted me to tell you guys to wake up

Kataoka Megu: So you all better be up and waiting in the corridor in ten minutes or I’m having Ritsu expose anyone still in their rooms

Okajima Taiga: You can’t touch me, I’m shameless

Kataoka Megu: Yes

Kataoka Megu: You streaking across the mountain after school is a testament to that

Okajima Taiga: There’s nothing wrong with trespassing the E-Class campus at night to engage in hobbies

Okajima Taiga: Right Mimura? (smirk face)

Mimura Kouki: When I become a serial killer you’ll be my first victim

Kimura Masayoshi: ‘when’?

Mimura Kouki: Trust me

Mimura Kouki: It’ll happen