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1. Simon Tam was the apple of his parents' eyes - until the day River was born.
2. He wasn't graceful and athletic like River, but he was artistic. From the moment he was able to hold a crayon or a pencil, he was able to draw the most amazing pictures. He told his parents one day that he wanted to be an artist when he grew up. They told him there was no money in it, and took away his art supplies. He still doodles whenever he has a pencil in his hand.
3. He obtained his education through private tutoring until he went to college.
4. Unlike many young people away from home for the first time, he hit the books, not the party scene, at college - until the night his roommate jokingly hired an unregistered Companion to seduce him.
5. Shortly after this experience, he learned to use sarcasm to cover-up his feelings of inadequacy.
6. He didn't really want to be a doctor; he would have preferred to be a research scientist. But his parents insisted, so he went to MedAcad to try to please them.
7. Once at MedAcad, he found that he had an affinity for the work, which surprised him. When he mentioned this to his parents, they told him that his maternal great-grandmother had been a healer. When he asked why he hadn't known that, they said it wasn't important since she'd had no training.
8. When River started talking about "The Academy," he checked it out with his colleagues and professors. He even went to visit the campus. He thought it seemed like a good place for her to go, and encouraged her to attend.
9. He could have graduated top of his class, but didn't take up the offer for extra "tutoring" by his psychology professor.
10. He wonders if he would have figured out that River was in trouble sooner if he hadn't been so tired from his workload as an intern.
11. He first learned of the underground group infiltrating "The Academy" when a patient overheard him expressing his concerns about River to a colleague.
12. He didn't give up just his way of life and his career to save River. He gave up the only serious relationship he'd ever had. Sometimes he wonders what happened to Giles.
13. He wishes he could contact his mother to let her know River's alive.
14. He wishes he still believed in Shepherd's God, the one who let the Alliance get away with experimenting on River and other children, but he can't.
15. He hates to admit it, but his parents were right to insist he go into medicine instead of research. At least this way he has a place, however tenuous, on Serenity. He'll have to remember to thank them - if he ever sees them again.
16. He misses swimming. It was the only sport he'd ever enjoyed, plus it kept him in shape. Now he has to settle for push-ups and sit-ups in his room, since weight-lifting never interested him. It's not the same.
17. He wishes Kaylee would find someone else to admire and leave him alone, because he's just not worthy of her.
18. He thinks he's a coward because he can't take a life, even when someone he loves is being threatened.
19. He wishes there were someone in the 'verse who could share his burden, who would love him for himself, insecurities and all.
20. He wishes that someone were Mal.
