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When Sam was possessed by Lucifer, it was hell for Dean, seeing Sam’s body but not Sam. Now that Sam was Sam again, it was even worse. When Lucifer left his brother’s body, Sam didn’t remember anything, he was diagnosed with amnesia. It was Sam’s body but still not Sam. Dean spent every second of the day trying to do or show Sam things that would trigger his memories but nothing was working and Dean was starting to lose hope.
It was a Thursday night, Sam and Dean were in the bunker, sat in the kitchen. Dean was showing Sam pictures to see if he’d remember anything. Luckily, Sam mostly remembered Dean and the fact that they were brothers but not much else. Dean thought if Sam had a girlfriend or something then he might remember but even when he showed Sam a picture of Jess, he didn’t recognise her. Dean flipped through a few more pictures before he came to one of himself, Sam and Gabriel except they all had their arms round each other and looked happy, like friends. Dean and Gabe were both looking at the camera but Sam was looking to his left down at Gabriel with a loving smile plastered on his face, his eyes were sparkling in a way Dean had never seen before. Dean had come across it in the alternate universe that Balthasar had thrown them into, where their lived were a TV show, he’d picked it up and pocketed it and apparently kept it ever since. H e went to flip past the picture when Sam placed a hand on his wrist to stop him, taking the small card and studying it intently before looking up at Dean and speaking.
“Who is this?” Sam asked, tilting his head to the side slightly like a confused puppy.
“That Sammy, is Gabriel. The Archangel, bad guy.” Dean said plainly, scowling a little as he took a bite from the sandwich he’d made earlier.
“I remember him.” Dean froze mid-bite and stared at his brother.
“You what?” Dean mumbled with his mouth full.
“I-I remember him, I remember a building with green spirals on the wall maybe? I’m not sure.”
“Mystery Spot. You remember Mystery Spot, we investigated a disappearance and The Trickster showed up and put you in a time loop. How the hell do you remember him and that but not even Cas?” Dean was trying to comprehend how Sam’s memory was remembering all that but not Cas or Bobby or even their dad. ‘At least it’s something’ he thought.
“Wait, was he not important to me?”
“Uh no Sammy he wasn’t, he wasn’t much to either of us except a pain in the ass.” Dean took another bite of his sandwich as Sam continued to stare are the photo.
“Urm Dean… If that’s true then why do I feel love when I look at this picture?” Dean froze once again, he had to be hearing things. Sam’s expression was one of awe and adoration as he looked at Gabriel’s face.
“Did you just say you love him?”
“I guess so but I also can’t help but feeling sad when I look at him.” Sam looked up from the photograph and into Dean’s eyes, Sam’s were filled with hurt and lined with tears.
“Sammy…uh…” Dean hesitated, Sam didn’t technically know Gabriel was dead and he also didn’t need to, it would obviously hurt him… but he deserved to know.
“Gabriel died Sam.” Dean said softly, watching his brother’s reaction carefully. Sam’s eyes widened as memories of his entire life flashed through his mind, a throbbing headache coming on within seconds, right before everything went black.
Sam came to in his bed a few hours later, his head pounding as he sat up. He slowly stood and began walking towards the kitchen but when he arrived in the doorway, Dean wasn’t there. Just as he was about to turn and go back to his room he heard hushed voices from the library, he walked down the hall and stopped a few metres down, he walked closer, recognising one of the voices as Dean’s. The other voice sounded familiar but he couldn’t place it, the two seemed to be arguing but whispering, obviously not wanting to wake Sam or for him to hear. Just then Sam heard his name.
“Sam remembered you. YOU of all people.” Dean hissed.
“Well don’t you think I should get to see him then?!”
“After what you did? After you supposedly died and left him hopeless and depressed to go to Monte Carlo with pornstars, just to show up now when he has a chance of getting over you?! No way!”
The voice was so homely to Sam that he couldn’t take it anymore, he needed to find out who it was. Sam stepped out into the library as Dean stopped talking and stared at him, the other man was a smaller figure, a signature green jacket hugging his figure perfectly and slicked back hair neatly combed to its usual style. Dean’s expression said it all and the smaller man turned around to look at Sam.
“I remember everything.” Sam breathed out, not once taking his eyes off Gabriel.
“Hey Kiddo…” He smiled warmly and Sam felt dizzy, he stumbled slightly, almost passing out again but managing to grab onto a chair in time for Dean to rush over and catch him. Dean looked over at the archangel and scowled.
“I think you should leave Gabriel.” That name sent all sorts of emotions spiralling through Sam’s head but he quickly got them under control and took a few deep breaths before letting go of his brother and standing on his own, intently staring at the heart wrenching memories stood in front of him.
“Y-You can’t be here… You d-… you d-died.”
“Well I kinda faked my death, left to start a new life but-”
“You left us? You left me Gabriel?!”
“I know and I’m sorry Sam! I thought I didn’t care about you and you didn’t care about me and it was only after I left that I realised that I-… th-that I’m... that I’m in love with you! Okay? There. I said it. I’m in love with you Sam and I regretted leaving every single day.”
“But not enough to come back, huh?” Sam had tears in his eyes as he turned and headed for the door.
“I was scared, okay?!” Gabriel exploded, stopping Sam dead in his tracks.
“I was scared Sam. Scared of coming back and you rejecting me or… or that you’d have forgotten me.”
“Forget you? Gabriel I loved you and you left me alone to clean up your mess. That’s not something you forget.” Tears were now falling freely down Sam’s cheeks as he turned and left, heading straight for his bedroom. Dean stared at Gabriel with murderous eyes, a low growl escaping his lips as the angel looked at him helplessly.
“You fix him. Or I break you.” Dean said through gritted teeth as he stepped out of the doorway to let Gabriel through who immediately rushed down the corridor after Sam, catching up to him about half way down the hall.
“Did you really mean that? That you loved me?” Gabriel asked. Sam stopped and slowly turned around before nodding. A small smile crept onto the angel’s face before it quickly vanished again and the word ‘loved’ swam through his head.
“Wait… loved as in past tense?” The smaller man’s voice broke as the possibility of Sam no longer loving him hit him. Sam chuckled lightly.
“No Gabriel…I still do.” Sam spoke softly. His own smile appearing as Gabriel’s did once again. Gabriel took a few steps closer so that the pair were as close as possible without being pushed up against one another. The angel leant forward on his tiptoes as his arms wrapped around Sam’s neck. One hand tangled in his long hair while the other gently pushed on Sam’s head until their lips met. Sam didn’t react at first but after a few seconds kissed back, his tongue forcing itself between Gabe’s lips and into his mouth. Sam gripped Gabriel’s wrists and spun them around and pressed the archangel up against the wall, kissing him passionately. They stayed like that for a few minutes before they had to pull away for air. Sam looked deep into Gabriel’s eyes, silently speaking to him. Gabriel knew what Sam needed to hear.
“I’m never leaving you again. I love you Sam.” He promised before capturing Sam’s lips again and jumping up to wrap his legs around the taller man’s waist. Sam carried him into the bedroom and its safe to say that Dean didn’t get a lot of sleep that night. Gabriel is loud.