Chapter Text
"B B B B B B B B"
Gordon rubbed his temples and let out a short snort. This was his life now. He glanced over towards Benrey, not daring to let his gaze linger for too long, least Benrey decide to take Gordon's momentary interest in whatever the fuck he was doing as a signal to come 'socialise' with him. No matter how weird it was, do not look for more than a second. To be fair, this time it was one of the least bizarre things he'd seen Benrey doing. He was just tapping away at the same spot on his phone while making a bunch of 'B' noises with his mouth. It was oddly harmless. That still unsettled Gordon somewhat. It didn't seem right.
He took a moment to glance around the room in its entirety, still making sure not to stare at any member of the team. He really needed a break right now. Though he may love them, even that couldn't disguise the fact that sometimes, heck frequently, they were really really really irritating. As it was, Dr Coomer was going on some tangent. Probably about his ex-wife. Or how he was certain they had wiped out 100% of the bug population within the building. Or a Wikipedia article about bugs. Bubby was sat nearby. It was hard to discern if he was feigning interest or genuinely listening to Coomer, but Gordon resisted the urge to try to find out. Limited eye contact was key. Tommy appeared to have fallen asleep, Sunkist lying next to him, somehow both lazily and protectively. How that was possible, Gordon couldn't work out, and least not without risking conversation. And then Benrey again. Tapping away on his phone in his own little corner, making some stupid sound and some stupid face, filling the air with Black Mesa Sweet Voice.
Gordon pressed a hand into his head, as though trying to squash the buzzing and ringing in his skull. It would have been so easy. So easy to never deal with that shit again. He lay face down, squeezed his eyes shut, both hands now clamped on top of his head. But even in his frustration, in his own imagination, he couldn't picture himself actually doing it. And for a moment he focused on those memories, trying to sift his feelings out of the throbbing in his head.
The sound of each footsteps echoing distantly, vanishing off into the distance, kept him going. He took slow steps, glancing towards the sky, open and looming. They had escaped. There was something beyond Black Mesa, beyond the party and after-party. He wasn't certain that they should have escaped, but it was done now. The repercussions could chase them down, but the sweet taste of fresh clean air that he was never meant to breath would make it just about worth it.
He glanced back towards the abandoned building they had 'requisitioned' under 'Science Team Fucks Good' rules. It was some distance away now. He had seen glimpses of society when he was walking, but kept that information to himself. For now, the 'Science Team Beyblade Fuck Dome' would be the best place for them all. God he wished he'd used a different system to name the place. 'Everyone contributes a word' is not something that always works.
His mind was wandering, as were his legs, but that journey seemed to shatter as his eyes subconsciously locked on something. And before Gordon had managed to snap out of his thoughts, overwhelming rage and terror was already taking effects. Through the haze of emotions, he forced himself to actually connect eye to brain and comprehend what he was seeing.
A guard body
No no no no fuck no shit fuck no no no no NO NO NO
Gordon let out an inhuman sound and pressed his hands to the sides of his head. Closing and opening his eyes over and over, in the hope the body would vanish. They hadn’t seen any of the clones since they got here, heck they hadn’t really seen other people, this wasn’t Black Mesa, there weren’t just guards lying around. But it couldn’t be, it couldn’t be, maybe one of the guards followed them though? Maybe everyone in this world just looked like guards! Maybe it was a rock that looked like a guard? Each attempt to convince himself that it wasn’t him failed and they were only getting more ridiculous. Eventually Gordon accepted there was only one thing to do. He knelt down besides the body. He knew the moment he got closer.
Benrey.
And he was still alive. His chest was moving up and down, taking shallow breaths. The motion made Gordon sick. Did the bastard even need to breathe? What kind of sick mockery was going on here? He wasn’t human! He didn’t need what they needed. Yet… he looked so oddly weak. Every few breaths he’d make a strangled noise, as though he were suddenly breathing syrup. It was a struggle. A genuine one perhaps. Was this all that was left of him?
Gordon thought back to the battle. He was sure Benrey had died… but he hadn’t actually got to see the body. That stupid suit wearing Chuck E Cheese debating dude had whisked him away… IT'S A FUCKING RESTAURANT! And then he hears that voice…
"Dr Freeman...Ah, it appears a mistake was made with the…. Trash disposal. Perhaps a simple matter of using the wrong part of a trash compactor. I'm sure you can rectify this…"
Gordon glanced around for suit man, but he was nowhere to be seen. Perhaps he could still speak here? Or fragments of him echoed within Gordons fractured mind? Or perhaps it was the voice of the anger that was boiling in his chest. An attempt to cover his desires with the excuse of following orders? Gordon placed his hand over Benrey's neck. This was it. He wanted this. He wanted this. He wanted this… he took a deep breath, swallowed… and his hand continued to hover.
"Fuck… why… why can't-"
His words were cut off by a stream of brightly coloured Sweet Voice flooding into his mouth, almost choking and burning as it flowed into his lungs. He felt a sense of revulsion take hold of him, a deep nausea within his stomach. He gritted his teeth, and pushed himself away from Benrey, placing his hands on the ground to stabilise himself. He glanced over, Benreys mouth still leaking that bizarre substance. He was still though, this was no attack. An uncontrollable stream, released in response to Gordon's voice. Gordon forced himself to keep breathing, even though each breath seemed to push the Sweet Voice further into his lungs, letting it invade his body. The feelings grew more intense, he felt like he was going to be sick, going to explode, tears stung at the corner of his eyes and his body was shaking. And then with one, sharp breath, enough of it permeated into his body that he was snapped into understanding.
Benrey had known the whole time. He had known Gordon would be the one involved in the test. That Gordon was the one the 'G-Man' (the… suit dude???) had sent to take care of Benrey. Every stupid thing, the passports, the following, the comments, the arm, it was some desperate, pitiful attempt to get Gordon to stop, to give up. He had to stop Gordon. If he didn't he was going to die going to die going to die going to die-
Gordon jolted back, slapping at his face and the now golden brown Sweet Voice surrounding him. Benrey was still spewing it, like some kind of disgusting fountain. The voice hung in the air, a sense of dread seeming to waft from it… and each second that he lingered in the cloud brought new ideas to his head. Cracking Benrey’s skull, crushing him, bludgeoning him with a rock, carrying him to a cliff and hurling his pathetic body...Gordon pushed himself out of the cloud and away from Benrey, trying to process the feelings and memories inflicted on him.
"Mr Freeman? I know you wanted to be out here alone for a bit, but it's been-"
Tommy's voice stalled at the sight
"That's a lot of...Is that-"
"It's Benrey… Tommy what does all this mean" Gordon waved his hand in the air, gesturing at the Sweet Voice.
"Golden brown like rye means he's expecting to die…"
"Is that what he wants?"
"I don't think so Mr Freeman I uh think. I... think he just thinks he will?"
Gordon looked over Benrey. Benrey was expecting this. He'd done everything he could to stop it… short of straight killing Gordon. Gordon had to wonder if he could have done that at any time. If there was some tiny fraction of mercy within Benrey… or if he just hadn't had the power at the time.
Well fuck all that. Fuck everything that was planned, fuck Black Mesa, fuck suit dude, fuck doing what he was 'meant' to do.
Yet he still hesitated. He turned towards Tommy, slowly, as his body still seemed to be suffering from Sweet Voice overdose.
"What should we do with him, Tommy?"
'I uh, I'm not in charge anymore, Mr Freeman'
Gordon let out a sigh through his nose. He could tell Tommy just didn't want to force that choice on him. But that's exactly what Gordon wanted him to do. He didn't want to make it himself.
"We're the Science Team, right? Team. So. I'll listen to your thoughts and consider them. What do you think we should do, Tommy. I trust you"
Tommy fumbled with his hands, mimicking the action of letting rip a Beyblade. Gordon would have to make sure he got him one when there was a chance. He deserved something to make him happy.
"I think… I think he needs help and.. we should help him, Mr Freeman"
Tommy avoided looking directly at Gordon as he said this, his voice shaking somewhat. Gordon pushed himself up and walked over to Tommy, gently placing a hand on his shoulder.
“I think you’re right Tommy. I think we’ll do that. Yeah, sure, why fucking not! Come on, let's have a look at him”
They knelt over Benrey, who’d finally stopped his impression of a Soda Machine.
“He looks in a really bad way, Mr Freeman!”
“Don’t worry Tommy, we’ll change that! We'll grab some needles and shoot up his veins with Soda. Slap a medkit on his head. Shove another stick up his ass, see if that gets his mouth running again"
"Uh I'm not really a medical doctor Mr Freeman but I don't remember reading about any of that. I'm not sure that will help!"
Gordon couldn't help but laugh. Tommy had a sweet naivety about him when it came to certain topics. It was somewhat grounding. Tommy gave him a confused look.
"Well, neither am I! But I'm sure we can work it out. Or he'll fix himself. He always managed to do it when it was inconvenient… no doubt he’ll be an extra inconvenience now and expect us to handle it all"
Gordon reached down to scoop up Benrey. He made sure to be a little rough, digging the nails of his regenerated hand into him. Wanting to whisper 'Just be fucking grateful I don't have a gun for an arm still'. He kept that thought to himself though. It would be fun to be the one shifting around the sleeping idiot for once.
It didn’t take long to reach the STBFD (it wasn’t even a dome ), even with Benrey being carried in every undignified way Gordon could manage, and some pictures taken along the way for… documentation. Tommy ran ahead, to be greeted by Sunkist and the rest of the team.
“Look who Mr Freeman found!”
"Oh finally. I was wondering when he would get back". Bubby seemed almost annoyed that they were making him pay attention. It was as though Gordon had brought back a rock, instead of the body of the otherworldly alien they thought they had killed.
Gordon just stared at Bubby. He needed a few moments to process- no ok he’s got it.
“Back? Back from where?!”
“Hell! We sent him there. He took a long time to get back. I hope he had a good holiday!” There was almost a sense of joy in his voice. Almost. And then back to irritation and looking elsewhere.
“Hello Gordon- Hell! Hello-”
Gordon just buried his head in his hands, letting out a choked laugh. True death and the consequences of it were such an alien concept to all of them.
“Hey Doctor Coomer. Listen, I’m going to head back out on my walk, I need… ugh… something, after all this. See what you can do about…”
He just gestures vaguely at Benrey. This walk had not given him what he needed and like Hell he was going to be around when Benrey woke up. He turned around and started to head out the door, before Doctor Coomer called out.
"You just went for a walk- Hello- Have a nice walk Gordon"
God they were not ready for normal contact yet… Would they ever be? Would this bunch of questionably human things ever-
“YO GORGONZOLA FREEMAT, I GOT A QUESTION FOR YOU”
Gordon was snapped out of his memories, back to the present time. Lying face down, on the floor of the STBFD, and oh God, Benrey was coming over. Gordon just lay as still as possible. Benrey had seen him sleep, watched him sleep, the thought almost made him shudder, and he knew Benrey would know he was faking…
“Yo, Idiot?”
He didn’t move. Just waited for the inevitable kick or punch, as Benrey loomed over him.
“....yo… baby boy Feetman having a little nap in his special sleepy spot… haha… yeah ok, I don’t want advice from sleepy babies... bro, you rest for now. .”
He walked away
He walked away...